Nostalgia or was it simply better?

DannyBOI_LE · 2024-03-30T12:44:39+00:00

It was better. Clearly. The internet started with good intentions. But over time it lead to higher concentrations of power and authoritarianism not information utopia. Ironically people are more disconnected to community despite having the ability to be connected and social media amplifies the les than admiral aspects of humanity as a business model. Dating apps have gamified relationships and now people forgot how to properly flirt or be seductive in public places. Music and art used to be cultivated in local scenes, but have no become a series of one off marketing campaigns like lottery tickets for those who hope to go viral. Pre- internet was better, and AI will undoubtably push societies even further to the extremes.

GYN-k4H-Q3z-75B · 2024-03-30T13:14:54+00:00

It was better. For men and women.

The internet gives men infinite competition and women infinite options. Both make people unhappy.

The prevalence of cell phones and social media made plans unreliable and non-binding. Gone are the days when plans meant something.

banthaaa · 2024-03-30T12:46:01+00:00

I'm not old enough to even begin to remember pre-Internet, but the watershed moment for me was Covid. Many things have not gone back to being the same since.

arsenalfc4life1500 · 2024-03-30T14:28:16+00:00

I think it was because the competition was mostly people in your local area rather than across the globe and expectations were much more reasonable IMO. Having no social media definitely humbles people. With OLD/Instagram there's a lot more arrogance and exaggerations of ones own importance. Communities were also a lot closer in the 90'-2000's. If you were a millenial like me or even a older generation before mine it was a lot better.

oldjar7 · 2024-03-30T19:34:48+00:00

None of this red pill, blue pill crap even existed back then, nor was there a need for it. I think that alone signals things were simply better, especially before social media took off.

alotofironsinthefire · 2024-03-30T15:08:12+00:00

Honestly I will say the problem with OLD now is that the companies (or company) that run it. Doesn't care about making its customers happy, it instead tries to make them unhappy so they will keep using the program and paying more money and attention to it.

Siliconmage76 · 2024-03-30T15:37:23+00:00

Hell the early to mid aughts OLD was awesome. PoF was actually a great way to meet women and they even sponsored singles dances and other events locally around the country.

Now it's a wasteland but I still manage a date once every month or two through it even though the vast majority of my dating is IRL.

baiser_vole · 2024-03-30T17:29:44+00:00

We used to know who the shitty people were, because we all knew each other in our communities. We had to be somewhat decent to each other cause of our reputation. Catching feelings used to be a thing. It is as if we have forgotten that we are human. I think there was a golden era of enough prosperity but not too much technological advancement and big city life.

ushfid743hfsdk3 · 2024-03-30T19:12:21+00:00

It was better.

SwaySh0t · 2024-03-30T19:38:26+00:00

It was better because you were held accountable by your social circle/community. Reputation meant a lot, way more than the facade of the character people created for themselves online. Moreover the dating world was localized instead of globalized which means you had to put your best foot forwards because rejection was much more punishing. Everyone put in more effort.

AreOut · 2024-03-30T20:02:30+00:00

I think it's both. It was better and people are nostalgic because it was better so there.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-03-30T13:04:19+00:00

It was better unless you were an outcast. Then it was both better and worse.

The good: those groups (in school at least) would find each other and become real close small groups of friends. The bad? Bullying and being mocked and teased and openly declared a “freak or loser” were not only way more accepted, even some teachers would be in on it because “maybe it would make them more normal”.

So if you were obsessed with things like anime, video games, superhero’s, D&D or that Magic: the gathering game (or were gay!). Be prepared to picked on and bullied by the people that thought that was “kid stuff” and “nerd shit!”

Cethlinnstooth · 2024-03-30T14:04:38+00:00

It is worse for introverts who go with the flow, accept the options that result in them being alienated from society and then leave it real late to do anything about that.

Everyone else is better off.

Whoreasaurus_Rex · 2024-03-30T13:06:24+00:00

Doesn't really matter. You can't unring that bell.

(Wait, aren't you the same guy who said a few hours ago: "I’m a good looking rich white dude, I’ve never had to pursue a woman." Then what do you know about swiping and having problems meeting people?)

Good_Result2787 · 2024-03-30T14:15:32+00:00

It's probably worse for the demographic who will only go out and try to meet people if "forced" to do so. It's even the first part of your own post, that the lack of choice or options resulted in the person or group being "forced" to do otherwise.

These kinds of people still exist and the internet made it worse for them because they now don't have to force themselves to go out there and thus they will not. For people who don't do social interactions outside of the internet simply out of some kind of requirement, things are better.

lastoflast67 · 2024-03-30T15:23:15+00:00

It was better, most guys never had any shot at attracting the avg woman off purely upfront displays alone, like what you get on dating apps, he always relied on the social proof of being known as a respectable guy within the social circles he shared with the women he courted. Also becuase social circles where larger women's hypergamy was necessarily kept in check by each other becuase women would give untold amounts of shit to other women that are on chads roster out of jealousy. Whereas now girls can be on chads roster but they will tell their friends their in a "situationship" or there just dating a guy and its kind of just not addressed that chad prolly has other women.

spaffjizz · 2024-03-31T12:14:03+00:00

I find the world is now split into people who go out, and people who don't.

Town is full of people 18-50 who enjoy music and socialising. People make friends, swap numbers and go on the pull all the time.

purplish_possum · 2024-03-30T15:03:00+00:00

Dating has always been a struggle for a lot of people.

The early internet actually improved things. In the 90s the internet put like minded people in touch with each other. The internet back then was for finding out what was happening and then going in person. The early internet facilitated life but didn't take over.

RosieBarb · 2024-03-30T16:49:52+00:00

I am Gen X and social scenes were better, since you had to go out and have fun in person. Lots of roller rinks and bowling alleys and camping trips and silly house parties. It was fun.

But dating? Bleak. You only had whatever you could find at church or school, and it was limited. I like dark ethnic men but I had only white boys around me. Online dating changed that and I was able to finally fall in love.

Safinated · 2024-03-30T12:55:04+00:00

I’m sure it was better, for men

Nihi1986 · 2024-03-30T12:55:01+00:00

It was infinitely better. You wouldn't have such an abundance mindset so you'd be more patient and work extra hard on your relationship, so relationships worked better and for longer.

Solondthewookiee · 2024-03-30T13:11:57+00:00

Many relationships formed from friendships between two people that initially weren’t attracted to each other

Who told you this? Like sure it happened, but there's nothing to support it's any less common today.

thought dating was better then

The primary thing that has changed is not dating apps, but women becoming economically independent. Women rely on men less than ever for survival and, as a result, women are less willing to put up with an unsatisfying relationship.

wtknight · 2024-03-30T14:09:04+00:00

Before the internet one might be forced to just settle for someone whose personality wasn't really a match or whose looks didn't quite satisfy just because one didn't meet a lot of people. The internet gives a lot more choice, which is a good thing.

So yeah, I do think that people are glorifying the past too much. It wasn't perfect. The problem is that some people can't handle the vast amount of choice that the internet does give.

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RandomAttackHelpMe · 2024-03-31T01:33:44+00:00

A little bit of both I'd say. But yeah, you can't deny the impact and influence the internet has had on this sort of thing.

HTML_Novice · 2024-03-31T01:34:42+00:00

It was absolutely better. When I was 19 I’d approach girls all the time everywhere and I got so so many dates out of it. I wasn’t good looking either, I was slightly below average.

Back then though, the standards weren’t high because online dating wasn’t a thing yet. Now? I have to be peak looks wise to land dates and they’re way harder to land.

It was nicer back then… people felt more real

Ppdebatesomental · 2024-03-31T02:25:34+00:00

Here’s something to ponder. My late bil had 700 Facebook friends. He needed us to drive 400 miles to help him move.

Intrepid-Rip-2280 · 2024-03-31T10:46:44+00:00

Then I was dating real girlfriends, now I'm dating Eva AI sexting bot. It wasn't simpler at all, but it was simply better.

wolfloveyes · 2024-03-30T13:20:02+00:00

There are a few women who call me "most important guy" in her life after her parents. You know who they fuck? The guys who don't care much about them. They've gone through unreliable guys, narcissistic guys who made her life difficult.

If better looking guys are swipe away character doesn't matter, even if he's a demon - she will go for it.

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Sharp_Engineering379 · 2024-03-30T16:16:04+00:00

Many relationships formed from friendships between two people that initially weren’t attracted to each other, so much so, that this was a common occurrence, it simply was normal.

What evidence do you have of this? Other than shaming people who prefer dating others they find sexually attractive.

John_Oakman · 2024-03-30T13:49:27+00:00

Continued and perpetuated existence is justification for itself, but necessarily a justification of moral grounds.

The older (social) systems were/are capable of sustaining its own population, but often at hideous costs to those within.

Of course, the question for the modern moralists is how to face the reality that their moral virtues are not sustainable in the long run, and that the very immoral (but sustainable) forms will be around (or even reappear) after they're gone?

techr0nin · 2024-03-30T16:35:16+00:00

I think if you are attractive/wealthy, today’s dating environment is much more efficient. Particularly if you are a man looking for hookups.

For everyone else it’s probably worse.

GhettoJamesBond · 2024-03-30T13:50:15+00:00

Definitely better. You had a shot back then. Girls weren't so entitled. You can see how the internet or social media specifically really changed people for the worst. It made everyone stupid and antisocial.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-03-30T15:55:03+00:00

Irl dating was better. Now old is better but only because it's an all or nothing choice really. If anyone does old, old is superior to irl but irl only is the best choice. But when you tell me I can fuck a girl who ran through tinder by getting dressed and going to a bar and spending money OR I can get the same girl wearing sweat pants and watching TV and clicking an app... duh which will I pick? Gee whiz.

Ideally irl only is best because the women don't drop down in quality so much because they can't all meet the same men.

Title	Nostalgia or was it simply better?
Author	Ylduts
Upvotes	17
Comments	148
Date	March 30, 2024 12:30 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1brgrpk/nostalgia_or_was_it_simply_better/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/nostalgia-or-was-it-simply-better.1513448 https://theredarchive.com/post/1513448

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