I want your stories: Have you ever dated a guy who really looked up to guys like Elon Musk or Bill Gates & What was your experience?

Mysterious_Call_924 · 2022-01-15T02:51:07+00:00

Similar but slightly different: I had a guy (we'll call him X) who pursued me that idolized Jordan Belfort, the man Wolf of Wall Street is based on. He's X's life aspiration and the reason X went into finance.

I've never seen the movie but I was familiar with the general premise and thought he was joking. Why would you want to idolize a promiscuous drug addict who swindled people out of money?

Needless to say X threw a temper tantrum and talked about how drugs are his life?! It was nuts. And something about how he's basically a-ok with white collar crime because he likes "the challenge".

He has made all of his major schooling/career decisions based around his obsession with this guy. I was grateful that he came out and told me all of that so I could get the hell away from him. Not sure why he thinks crime and drugs are cool but I've learned to mostly avoid any business/finance "bros"

2340000 · 2022-01-15T01:14:29+00:00

Yes🤡. I was 21, so forgive me.

He was a software engineer and porn addict. Obviously obsessed with Elon Musk. His preferred communication style was memes or gaslighting. He also believed in "trickle down economics".

My experience: I reported him to the police for sexual battery.

notochord · 2022-01-15T03:19:41+00:00

My ZVX thought Musk was really cool and “living the life”, with the insinuation that he would treat people the way Musk does it he had enough money and resources. To the surprise of no one, my ex was a massive, flaming narcissist who was also really shity at life. Like he couldn’t even wake himself up on time for work and would get mad at me for his sleeping in.

Asking about their role models is such a good way to vet men.

AestheticStateofMind · 2022-01-15T04:57:37+00:00

I dated a guy who was really into Joe Rogan. And to be fair, I really liked the podcast episodes I was first introduced to by him. I mainly liked some of the guests he had.

When I was exposed to Rogan’s misogynistic tendencies and toxic masculinity I stopped listening to him. I came to see him as the pseudo-awakened type and I would start talking to my ex about this. He would causally put it off or dismiss some of this behavior (as LVMs tend to do). Sometimes he would hear me out and agreed with me in some instances, but it would be like half the time. I would get so frustrated and start to feel like I needed to defend my stance, which you should never waste your time with as I’ve come to learn (thank you FDS).

Overall, it exposed my BF as a porn addict with subtle patriarchal-defending biases 🤮. He had PIED and an “uncontrollable” public porn stare toward random women and GIRLS everywhere we went. Destroyed my self-esteem. Then I was saved by FDS, changed my mind-set and left his ass back at his parents. The level-up was real. Yeah, fuck Joe Rogan and his influence on men. Huge 🚩

Edit: Spelling error

InspectorGadget07 · 2022-01-15T00:58:36+00:00

I would never. Especially not a guy who looks up to or idolize Elon Musk.

Not much was known about Gates less savory side until recently. Like he hid it decently well and had good PR.

But Musk has long been openly sketchy and no role model. You need only look to his ex wife’s account of his psychopathy in her magazine interview

He also stole largely from work of others to get where he is rather than it being the work of his genius. He just buys people out and claims credit

vbych76 · 2022-01-15T01:58:38+00:00

Aren't we forgetting someone on that list, a certain someone, that is bald and so rich, that he recently funded his flight in space, instead of eliminating world hunger?

On a side note, I recommend re-reading Germinal by Emile Zola. History usually repeats itself.

Platipus6 · 2022-01-15T03:28:48+00:00

An ex loved Bill Gates and thought Melinda was holding him back, just a stupid quota woman in tech who took his money.

Never mind she birthed his kids and propped him up in public, keeping his shit together because he's so socially awkward.

Guess who minimized all the social benefits I brought him (even though he preened about how much better he was being treated in public while next to me, what a mystery), amplified his own negligible contributions and treated me like a gold-digger for asking him to bring groceries on the weekends he came over and ate all my food.

His preferred communication style (love it 2340000) was shrugging and stonewalling, because the only answer to "why did you just do that?" would be "because I'm an abusive asshole and I like abusing you" and he couldn't say that out loud.

cynthiaat92 · 2022-01-15T03:27:45+00:00

Annoying, always thinks they're the smartest person in the room. Would not recommend.

Catz10000 · 2022-01-15T01:12:28+00:00

Gates grew up privileged middle class. He was SO rude to his mother. I remember being young and reading an interview by his mother in the newspaper ( long time ago) when he was starting to be REALLY big. He was nerdy but condescending to people. I was surprised when he got married. I was not surprised when he got divorced. He's slightly better than Musk because of his philanthropy, but LV is still LV. Billionaires could be Batman and they choose to be the Joker.

Bot9813 · 2022-01-15T01:09:33+00:00

Never dated, but a coworker who also went to college with me idolizes them. He has this fantasy of becoming a multi-billionaire through investing, always bring up how he almost bought stock in GameStop. He spends his money on shit investments and has his gf pay for their shared expenses (except rent - that's 50/50 🙄)

Every single conversation he has with me ends up revolving around sex, even when I only respond to work-related things. He brings up Jordan Peterson a fair bit. He goes on and on about how his relationship is something to aspire to when actually he's just a misogynist who found his piece of play-dough

GeorgiaPeach_94 · 2022-01-15T06:16:08+00:00

Yup. He was a total narcissist living off mommy's money at 30 years old boasting about how he was intelligent like tony stark and would make big bucks with his genius business ideas he never actually did any work for.

Spoiler alert, as far as I know he's still in the exact same position 6 years later.

RevolutionaryNinja24 · 2022-01-15T04:10:58+00:00

I went on a date with this guy who was obsessed with Jeff Bezos. He spent the whole date talking about how people don’t know how to manage their money, shitting on 9-5 workers, the stock market - all that typical stuff. I’m a business owner myself and I guess he was under the impression we’d be some alpha entrepreneur couple but it was a hell no for me.

serpensurf · 2022-01-15T00:55:27+00:00

These days, I see someone who looks up to Elon Musk or Joe Rogan as red flags. I've tried dating guys like this and they were always a little sexist and condescending. It also just shows what their hobbies are and how mine don't align with theirs.

seattle-sushi- · 2022-01-15T02:21:13+00:00

Omg yes!

He idolized billionaires. And what did he do with his life you may ask? He tried to build some lame app with his friend. They didn’t have any skills so they outsourced it to India. Then he quit his job and relied on me to support him financially. I paid for everything all the time. He had some dream of the app blowing up and getting bought out, which was silly because there was nothing proprietary about it and he only owned like 5% of it anyway.

In short, he was a total bum who relied on his girlfriend to give him lunch money and he worshipped billionaires while calling wives of rappers “gold diggers”.

Skater_Babe_917 · 2022-01-15T04:22:28+00:00

My LVX idolized Trump and told me to vote for him and that he was “a solid guy”. He was extremely emotionally abusive, manipulative and disrespectful.

Maingurl · 2022-01-15T01:36:57+00:00

All losers.

I know a guy who worked close w/ Elon. He worshipped him. A complete asshole.

Side story: Back when it was hard to get the covid vaccine he called me and flat-out told me he lied about being an essential work to get first dibs on the vaccine. Then he had the nerve to tell me I should lie too.

I was on the other line like 😳😳😳😳😳????

No thanks asshole.

itsirrelevant · 2022-01-15T02:48:30+00:00

Yes and he's a self loathing self absorbed covert narcissist software engineer. He can barely take care of himself or manage daily activities, had me make phone calls for him, but to him his ilk truly are the elite members of society. If only everyone else would understand that he and Elon are really cool good guys, then they wouldn't have to destroy us.

iacint · 2022-01-15T05:42:52+00:00

Steve Jobs fan: biggest LVM ever. Was bragging how much he loved steve and apple, even watched the movies and then i pointed that he was shitty dad he was like : but he named computer after her.

SpiteTomatoes · 2022-01-15T15:22:44+00:00

I casually dated someone obsessed w Elon Musk, he actually worked for Tesla (as a salesman, nothing spectacular). He definitely was a devil's advocate kinda guy. The kind that questions any progressive policy in defense of billionaires continuing to be billionaires. You know the type. His house also smelled like wet dog 🤢

indywol · 2022-01-15T04:58:07+00:00

Unfortunately, yes, and it wasn't a good experience. He treated everyone like an emotional punching bag and thought he was smarter than everyone else. Why'd I date him? The damn honeymoon thing that abusers do right at the beginning. All nice and wonderful until they feel comfortable.

Personally I think anyone male or female that idolizes ppl like Musk etc raises a huge red flag about their values.

CompetitiveTerra · 2022-01-15T03:17:57+00:00

Not someone I dated personally but he my boss!

As a boss he was a toxic, opportunistic POS. Very stingy. It was a very small company so we only had 4 employees & 2 of my colleagues (women) have been gaslit & manipulated so bad their pay is way below the minimum wage for over 2 years. It was a stressful working environment. He tried to convince me into doing the same (being paid less while doing the extra mile for his benefits) by gaslighting me, saying I should be grateful for the job & my pay (VERY low, because it was an internship turned part time job) is deserving since I don't have a degree in the field (graphic design). When there was a guest he forced me to make coffee for him. I didn't drink coffee so I barely knew how to do it and it was a bit cold. He said, "You're a woman, how's your husband going to live with a cold coffee?" What? He also refused to hire women for certain positions because he said the communication between two employees of that position will be hard if one of them is a woman (basically non-sense). Forces his employees to work even during paid leaves & holidays and they're barely compensated.

Now as a husband, I know his wife personally. And she's so gullible I feel so bad for her. She was told to stop working & take care of their baby (obviously he doesn't take care of his child), because he was barely home. He'd stay working very late and when we joked about this (saying his baby is gonna call him uncle if he continues working too much) he mentions it's fine since that happened to Bill Gates & he aspires to be him. And he says this in multiple occasions. (eh???) When we're in an outing and his wife comes, he always feels the need to quantify everything he's bought for his wife.

SearchLightsInc · 2022-01-15T03:47:42+00:00

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MissGalaxy1986 · 2022-01-15T10:41:54+00:00

(Oops this was meant as a reply to someone’s comment that gates grew up middle class). He grew up upper-middle class at the minimum. Father was an attorney who founded a law firm and his mother was a board member for United Way. A fellow United way board member had a high role in IBM and this man was a major reason for Gates’s success thanks to his mother’s connection to IBM this way.

Eschkolit · 2022-01-15T05:29:24+00:00

When my ex started talking to me about Tony Robbins, I resorted to hara-kiri.

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2022-01-15T05:34:17+00:00

Any man who idolises the disgustingly rich while the world burns is a block and delete.

elainejay82 · 2022-01-15T16:08:45+00:00

The only guy I knew who idolized Elon Musk was 45, a grandpa, and dating a 26 year old. She had to play wife, mom, and grandma. They weren't married and had been dating for years. He hired her at his plumbing company and they were also living together for years. Last I heard about them, he proposed during our hardest lockdowns and said, "We will have to wait for the wedding until Covid blows over."

Oh, the dude also idolized Joe Rogan. 🤣

burnedasawitch · 2022-01-15T05:03:58+00:00

Yes. He loved Elon Musk. We weren't living in the same world or speaking the same language. I'm realizing that the sex was really good in comparison to normal sad expectations and the kind of sex most women put up with. Unfortunately, he had narcissistic personality disorder.

Keepers12345 · 2022-01-15T03:43:37+00:00

I wouldn't date a man who idolized the former, who I see as someone who openly admits to using drugs and who spits out pubic statements that are generally emotionally immature, arrogant, and ego-centered.

I had an ex who idolized a religious figure as the ideal human who he wished to be. My ex also used religion as an escape, while living a double and triple life. Even the man who my ex idolized was more human than he gave him credit for. The fact that he aspired to be perfect, sinless, and selfless may have still been a relatively better option than choosing a hedonist.

However, choosing this religious figure, an unattainable and impractical idol, wasn't helpful, imho. My ex's approach to becoming like this man was cycling between repressing his feelings and anger, praying fervently and reading religious texts to subdue his anger and frustration (even in the middle of grocery shopping and other times where I felt so alone next to him), and drinking nightly until he'd "quit" for 2-3 weeks.

Now, I do admire men who look up to various people in their life, such as family members and parents, as well as public individuals who've contributed to the benefit of society and who've had to overcome great challenges to get to where they are today.

thatshadywitch · 2022-01-15T20:34:07+00:00

Yep. My ex idolised Elon Musk and Bill Gates, and was also into Jordan Peterson and the king of all scrotes, aka Joe Rogan. Guys who look up to sketchy billionaires and celebrities are a big no. Needless to say, he was a developer, porn addict, covert mysoginist (he would throw temper tantrums whenever I talked about feminism and patriarchy), constantly worried about being an "alpha male", believed he was a genius and everyone around him was stupid, and dreamed of becoming world-famous and successful. Oh yeah, as a side note, he was also into idiotic movies with Seth Rogen and once claimed he wanted to become a stoner for life. Like, okay I guess? I feel pity for my former self.

ciciplum · 2022-01-15T18:54:47+00:00

It's a deal breaker for me male or female. The last woman I briefly dated turned me off by praising Elon Musk and Joe Rogan 🤡😭

What you can tell is that generally they prioritize status and projection thereof over having a moral compass. They also like to share in the accomplishments of the men they see these qualities in - so by knowing everything about say Elon Musk, they feel they elevate their own social status.

I find it tiring - I'm 25 and a few years ago men repeating whatever they heard Joe Rogan or Elon Musk say gave me the ick but I would indulge them. Now it's an immediate deal breaker. I know exactly what kind of conversations I can expect from these people, how gullible they are and how little of their own thinking they do. This goes for the people who openly idolize these public figures - not necessarily those who might listen to Joe Rogan or like Tesla but do not adopt these interests as personality traits.

Puzzleheaded_Pickle · 2022-01-15T12:10:54+00:00

These are the atheist gods.

Pyramidddd · 2022-01-15T06:48:37+00:00

I dated a guy worth $200M who likes Elon. Billionaires with aspergers are not cute. My boyfriend had aspergers and it was horrible. He was like an emotional cripple and he thought his money made him special. It’s the same with Elon but Elon is much more successful and is technically benefiting the earth

vivid_spite · 2022-01-15T08:16:24+00:00

on a side note: I used to really like Musk because of his business success (regardless of how much help he had). I feel like guys who like him separate his personality/morals from his company. But again that's still an indicator of low EQ on their part. Also I know a guy who loves talking about tech and Elon and he has good empathy (majority of his friends are girls) and he's genuinely a shy soft boi. So they do exist.

VS377 · 2022-01-17T07:19:17+00:00

Dated a guy ~6ish years ago who idolized Musk. To be fair I don’t think Musk was as well known as he is now, but this ex was AWFUL. Constantly gaslighting, controlling (over very small things), overly critical of my behavior when he couldn’t hold down a job nor go to college. He went out of his way to make me feel awful for liking a certain movie or musician (or whatever else I was interested in), basic negging.

He had a massive ego regardless of the fact that he had no real life plans, just a general plan to “invent and innovate” new technologies. Big words from a man who could barely work 3 months at Target because it made his feet hurt.

When I broke up with him and especially when I started dating someone else he flipped out and told me that I would deserve any future abuse the new guy unleashed on me, that he was so much better off without me, that he had been cheating on me the whole time with someone across the country. And yet… still messaged me relentlessly every few months for THREE YEARS, just to leave messages about how my life sucks, how I’m doing nothing with myself, etc (even though he was still very much unemployed and not going to school). I guess he finally took the hint that it wasn’t getting to me after I blocked him (he would find ways around the block to message me).

seekingcodingjedi · 2022-03-12T09:05:56+00:00

Most of the times it's plain silly, since they feel they are kind of close to these men with truckloads of money and false ego but they hardly have any success to speak of. It's some kind of syndrome where they have a grandiose view of themselves and are usually absolutely not worth anyone's time.

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