Young, hot (and submissive) women are at a major disadvantage when it comes to finding a LTR compared to older or less attractive women

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2022-09-12T15:15:36+00:00

The key word here is definitely “submissive.” Assuming the ideal path for a young woman to take in life through a RP lens is to vet and secure the most alpha man she can find with enough beta tendencies to provide for her, those women tend to focus too heavily on the trad/submissive part and less on the uncompromising vetting part (which credit where credits is due, FDS does/did well).

The delicate wallflowers waiting for their “captain” to come take charge either get wrapped up in some pretty…problematic relationships, wait forever, or just have difficulty securing the commitment they want. This is all mainly from my observation of RP Women and Christian culture.

_revelationary · 2022-09-12T13:36:50+00:00

I don’t know any actual statistics on this and I doubt any research exists, but I would have to agree this hypothesis tracks in many (not all) cases.

Girls who are “hot” from a young age get a TON of positive reinforcement from it. They are also the ones more likely to dress in an overly-sexualized way to play up this strength. Sometimes they prize their physical appearance over other traits and don’t make as much of an effort to be an interesting person or develop other skills — they don’t need to. People (guys AND other girls) naturally gravitate toward them. Edited to add - some of them are genuinely good people but I think the constant message is appearance > everything else.

Enter adulthood and dating. Some of them might enjoy casual sex for the fun of it, sure. Others might just view sex as the easiest way for them to get close to someone, since they’ve always been taught their looks/sexuality were their biggest asset. I also think men stereotype these women (hot, makeup, dressed a certain way = easy lay, but not the wholesome woman I want to take home to meet my mom).

It’s probably difficult to separate the men who are serious from the ones who are just attracted to their bodies. And sure, they probably tend to chase the cocky, fit, “alpha” dudes who don’t want or need to settle down because they’re also having their fun.

It’s a cycle that perpetuates. I witnessed this in my high school. I was NOT a hot girl in high school. I had a few boyfriends but I was strictly in the athlete/nerd/student council group. But through social media I’ve gotten to witness the hot popular girls I went to school with age over the past 10 years and less than half ended up in healthy relationships and married in their 20s (I’m early 30s for reference). I will say — I have absolutely 0 idea whether this was by choice or if they were having too much fun to settle down. But it’s been interesting, because most of my high school friends were in LTR that led to marriage by age 25.

JumboJetz · 2022-09-12T16:08:18+00:00

This is a revenge fantasy. Young, hot women generally grow up to get whatever they want.

Now people are sometimes shit at deciding what they want so sometimes it’s a monkeys paw situation. I.e yes I married a millionaire or a doctor, but now his career is so busy I never see him. Or yes I married giga Chad, but he cheats on me. However I’m sure just as many hot women get amazing partners or stay single by choice.

ashleyrose56 · 2022-09-12T19:39:46+00:00

I am not sure; as a young hot woman I can see how I can get more attention than your average girl, but that attention doesn't necessarily translate to stable relationships which is my ultimate goal. Plus, I used to date older men, and they obviously weren't looking for anything more than a trophy girlfriend. Being agreeable only lead me to find subpar men, so I kinda agree with your point.

But at the same time, that's where vetting comes in, you get more unfit leads, but because you also get more approaches, you have more to choose from to find "the one".

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-09-12T14:26:21+00:00

Young, hot and submissive woman gets to pick the man she actually wants.

Old, disagreeable woman gets to pick from weak, feeble men.

This post is an insane hamster.

Sad_Entertainer6312 · 2022-09-12T13:25:31+00:00

So young hot women = stupid? Is that your thesis?

fake7272 · 2022-09-12T13:47:02+00:00

This is a funny observation. Basically, too many choices and not smart enough to know what you want from relationships results in girls choosing guys that only want to fuck them.

I disagree ofcourse, as I know many MANY women who are submissive and are in monogamous long term relationships. This post seems like a cope honestly.

Or its assuming that ugly guys have less options so they go for ugly girls and thus they can be happy together. It's always those darn thots in the dms that cause people to cheat and not their values as people.

kokorwqac · 2022-09-12T16:31:17+00:00

i've had guys that want to fuck me and be done even though they thought i was ugly

DeJuanBallard · 2022-09-12T18:09:12+00:00

Where do you people come up with this shit 😒

hungrychick404 · 2022-09-12T18:52:09+00:00

I think it depends on the woman.

I entered a relationship in my mid teens with a guy who I had a lot in common with and who liked me because I liked lizards and was nerdy like him. I glowed up a bit and ended the relationship our first year of college because of differing interest in social life (I was excited to meet people in college and make friends, while he preferred to keep to himself).

Once single and getting attention from men that I never have had before, I had trouble navigating things. I’m neurodivergent, socially anxious sometimes, and grew up in a religious household, so I found the college dating scene confusing to navigate. I ended up in some sexual situations I didn’t want because I didn’t understand consent as well as I should have at that age and had trouble expressing my boundaries. There were a few guys who I thought were my friends would make passes at me when I was drunk and I wouldn’t understand due to my inebriation either.

I found the process of sorting guys who just wanted my body from guys who liked my personality difficult due to my aforementioned differences in personality/upbringing, but I also have neurotypical friends who also found it difficult to tell if a guy actually liked them for them or for their bodies either. I think part of the problem is that men sometimes don’t know themselves

Edit: forgot to add this part earlier but I know a lot of attractive women who probably do find dating easier. They are often good at multiple things and are smart and they have found a perfect dude. I also know that it’s harder for unattractive women to find people to even acknowledge and respect their existence, which is unfair. I was just wanting to say there can be downsides, especially for people who are more submissive like OP said

Apprehensive_Cut_146 · 2022-09-12T13:49:25+00:00

What’s the matter with men here and having a submission kink?

Slipthe · 2022-09-12T13:29:43+00:00

And where does the skill of vetting people come from?

Gravel_Roads · 2022-09-12T13:29:45+00:00

Attractiveness does not correlate to social intelligence. A hot person (man or woman) is just as likely to be a blithering idiot as an ugly person.

A socially intelligent person just knows not to rely solely on their looks, no matter how attractive they are, as there are many circumstances where it will do nothing for you, and once looks have inevitably faded, social graces will be paramount to not fall between the cracks into dumbass anonymousness.

ohheyhi99 · 2022-09-12T14:44:28+00:00

Being unattractive is still worse. Unhappy unattractive people exist, but most people don’t pay attention to what’s going on with them, and they may have to settle.

Gigamon2014 · 2022-09-12T14:46:14+00:00

Also, I gotta be honest, I've not really seen this immense correlation with being hot and being this terribly entitled person. Met plenty of hot bimbos as well attractive women with intellect and integrity to spare.

I think this speaks to the immense insecurities a lot of redditors have about looks.

Hoopy223 · 2022-09-12T14:36:37+00:00

Where do you guys come up with this crap. It’s almost like you have never dated or even interacted with other human beings.

Ugly older women find love easier? What????

I don’t know where to begin its so off the wall lol.

prizefighterstudent · 2022-09-12T13:34:27+00:00

The demographic young hot women gun for are their looks match -- young, hot men. The thing about young hot men are:

They have options
They're likely to stay young and hot for a while

They'd be fools not to exercise those options in today's free-for-all, and can probably do so for long periods of time if they choose. So for certain naive, impressionable, or otherwise emotionally immature young women, this poses a problem. I've witnessed this firsthand.

Then again, nothing in this life is for sure, and every relationship entails risk. More astute young women could seek counsel and mentorship when it comes to navigating the space, since there are real risks present they might not be aware of.

midwesternMD · 2022-09-12T14:52:41+00:00

Disagree.

In fairness, I’m a man, so this is speculation. Then again, you verbiage implies that you’re not of a submissive/agreeable temperament. If that’s the case, we’re both just speculating.

Being submissive/agreeable isn’t inherently a disadvantage, and it also is a totally separate trait from the critical thinking skills to identify a good partner.

For one, being constantly swarmed by men from a young age should expose a given woman to more variations of seduction/personalities. And I would expect that exposure to this very quickly allows her to hone in her bullshit and asshole meter. Surely nothing is 100%, but I’d bet that a young attractive woman drowning in attention has more skills at sussing this out than say a young unattractive woman languishing in loneliness.

For two, I still maintain that dating is a numbers game. You’re compatible with perhaps 1-5% of the population from a personality standpoint. Unless you’re sampling said population, the odds of finding and engaging with someone in that cohort is small.

I don’t think I apply to the manosphere part of your post, but I do think that it’s misdirected. I think the manosphere praises young, hot, submissive, and agreeable because that’s what they think constitutes a good partner for them. And I don’t see anything wrong with that. It can certainly be a little cringeworthy in some contexts, but merely expressing what you want is generally something that should be embraced.

For me, I know that I desire someone attractive (everyone does), young-ish (don’t want to be rushed by her biological clock), and agreeable (as in… “not a bitch.”) I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with wanting that. Hell, I think most people looking for LTRs/families want that. Depending on the context of submissive, I might want that too. I like women who know what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it in general. But in the bedroom, I find that I enjoy the D/s kink dynamic. Even then, it’s not absolute.

chingness · 2022-09-12T13:40:30+00:00

This actually makes a lot of sense

grummthepillgrumm · 2022-09-12T14:05:48+00:00

You are starting with the presumption that young hot women want LTRs. Also when addresing an extremely attractive young woman thats submissive and agreeable....... thats just nitpicking hypotheticals. Like men who shit on scenrios with women who were ran through by 70 guys but now want them. Cant say it doesnt happen but its extremely rare.

Very hot people (especuially women) are usually entitled af. I worked with a cousin as a security guard at a club (i have zero experience im jusy big and bulky and his colleague stepped out) and let me tell you that theres is not a single people group thats worse to deal with that attractive women. Its like they cant do anything wrong, they yell and scream at you for any little thing and call you gay if you dont let them cut or something. Its anectodal evidence but so is your scenario.

For example i have seen and heard many scenarios where that type of woman simply dumps men who they have relationships with just to "enjoy their youth".

You pretend like all those women want relationships and they are just pursued for their body. Is that really the case?

Uglier and older women tend to have an easier time finding "the one" and love in general because the people surronding them are more likely around because they're genuinely interested in them, as a person, not a prize to seize.

I dont believe in the one. I think you find a person that meets your standards and you build a life with them. Ofc with some its easier than with others but you wont find someone that completely clicks with you in 99% of cases. Attractive women(and men but mostly women) simply have more choice when it comes to finding someone like that. They are much more priviledged than ugly women and have an easier time, its just they are much more picky. When you have all the optionsbits easy to be insecure whether youve picked the right one meanwhile when you dont have many and someone wants you and you want them you know its about as good as it gets so you embrace it.

NegotiationNo717 · 2022-09-12T14:22:33+00:00

This…… sounds like you dislike young and hot women. “Submissive” and “agreeable” women tend to end up with abusive men regardless of their looks. I’d actually say ugly women attract those men even more so because of their low self esteem.

You actually sound jealous of young beautiful women. You sound like ugly men who want people to think they’re good men and smart because they’re ugly. It’s giving not like other girls vibes.

melody_of_ · 2022-09-12T14:39:04+00:00

I see it time and time again, young, hot women often get messed around and left on the shelf (unmarried) longer than their less attractive and older counterparts because they have too many men swarming them for their body.

This gives them a lot more power and practice at vetting men and also as women like to claim here so often. Women crave sex just as much as men so if she has fwb she can seek out a relationship with them and in the worst case scenario she hasn't lost

Anything.

Also on top of all of that sexual interest is usually what guides people to try and get to know a person better.

And sexual intimacy and connection is pre requisite for most people to want to enter into something longer term.

in submission and agreeableness, chances they're going to end up with the wrong person because they will say yes to one of the guys swarming her,

Regardless of how agreeable a women is nearly all women are aware or their massive power in the dating market. Women dont just agree to date someone because they are submissive or agreeable they can still have their own agency even if they dont acting like abrasive entitled children.

Which is what men really mean when they say they want someone agreeable and submissive. If they realllly wanted a trad wife they would live the trad husband life style. They are just trying to find women who treat them as equals instead of as replaceable which is a lot more common than you would expect.

Uglier and older women tend to have an easier time finding "the one" and love in general because the people surronding them are more likely around because they're genuinely interested in them, as a person,

The thing being overlooked here is that less attractive women are targeted very often specifically because men believe them to be easier. So they are more likely to get pumped and dumped or strung along until the dude can find better. Shit that's probably contributed to why the fds exists in the first place.

Manospherian types obsessed over this particular age group but tend to miss all the disadvantage

Well the manosphere is about leveling yourself up so you can gave agency even as a male.

don't seem to see this and hyperfocus on all their slips up.

I'm a bit confused what is being referenced here.

fetishize the looks and submissiveness of this group when those very attributes are what hold them back from securing a long term, compatible partner.

Younger women have less baggage from past relationship by virtue of being younger. They have had less partners so their less likely to hold you to a superhuman standard of the amalgamation of the best of every partner they had under the guise of "knowing what she likes in bed".

Also men seem to be taking longer to succeed economically then women so it makes sense to shoot down a few years if you cant match economic parity with women your age yet.

They fetishize the looks

Men preferring younger women is a fetish now? Nah men just find younger women attractive. And trp is about empowering men to gain the skills and attributes to gain access to the dating market in a way that allows them to maximize their chances with whatever women they prefer

infinitofluxo · 2022-09-12T15:11:56+00:00

Only if she has poor judgement. Most men that want relationships would take the beautiful young one if she was willing. Also, plenty of men would only accept a relationship if it was with a woman that is better than any other he could have.

If a young and hot woman is being used for sex she is still valueing Chad characteristics only which is the same problem uglier women have and that will cause the pump and dump behavior.

RahLyt · 2022-09-12T15:27:16+00:00

Lol by submissive men don't mean submissive to everyone. A girl that is submissive to every guy is a hoe.

alphasupremacy5555 · 2022-09-12T15:46:03+00:00

So men should only ever go after women who are ugly and up cheating on them with women they actually want? Yea I agree with some of this the rest of bullshit. One of the reasons men who cheat are cheating is because they're not really attracted to the women they have so they have side chicks they actually want. Only desperate and pathetic beta simps marry ugly and older women. They marry unattractive and abrasive women who they have to put with. I mean yes a lot of young and sexy submissive women are do end up they way you say they do after toxic bad boy alphas are finished having their fun with them but that's because they can't stop choosing those men. So many tons of women generally have the horrible taste in men and make the absolute worst choices when it comes to men. They help them make them into single mothers, take abuse as love and go for lie after lie. But not all young, hot and submissive are stupid like that. The pros of young, sexually attractive, submissive and aggreable women far outweigh the cons. Like it said before ugly and older women end up getting cheating with young and sexy women and turned into stepmothers. Some even get divorced for younger and way sexier women. A man isn't gonna marry a woman seriously date a woman let alone marry her if she's so goddamn ugly. Men value women for their looks and sex appeal before anything else. Men want women who are sexy and young which usually mean more fertile and more healthy and tighter. They want don't women who are ugly and older who are usually stuck in their ways, argumentative, and demanding. Ugly and older get oftentimes get friendzoned.

Seaker___ · 2022-09-12T13:51:49+00:00

Sounds like cope. Not true at all

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KissMyAsthma-99 · 2022-09-12T14:34:40+00:00

You're clearly wrong, unless you are also positing that young and hot is inherently tied to being an idiot.

Add in submission and agreeableness, chances they're going to end up with the wrong person because they will say yes to one of the guys swarming her, who is only pretending to be nice or interested in the same things as her due to wanting her body.

The only way she ends up saying 'yes' to the wrong guy is if she's an idiot. She simply needs to wait until he commits (marriage) before choosing to have sex with him. If he won't wait, he's not the right guy.

They fetishize the looks and submissiveness of this group when those very attributes are what hold them back from securing a long term, compatible partner.

Not even remotely.

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-09-12T15:23:57+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Lift_and_Lurk · 2022-09-12T18:04:14+00:00

Young and hot women are not at a disadvantage period. Hell neither are young and hot men.

Put it another way: how many people would trade places with them even if it meant being “submissive”

Ok how many of then do you think would trade places with you?

Yup.

Obvious-Rise9199 · 2022-09-12T18:10:39+00:00

To break it down - the most valuable resources are left aside because people assume they will cost too much without doing the research?

icefire54 · 2022-09-12T20:17:32+00:00

Well duh, obviously people who are ugly are more likely to find someone who likes them just for their personality. The vast majority of people aren't like that though and it's really hard to find someone like that.

2022-09-12T21:24:32+00:00

I would say that it's only true for submissive women.

The rest is fine.

Exotic-One3381 · 2022-09-13T03:40:22+00:00

This is absolutely true. It only attracts Chad's and guys after your body and looks who want a trophy or to gawp at you or gross modelizer types. Oh and married rich guys. The normal guys always assume you are taken or married even if you've been single for years avoiding the above types. They always assume you are lying about your n count even if it's low because you attract the bad types. For a very weird reason, nice normal but unattractive guys will gawp but on a deep level feel uncomfortable around a very hot woman and generally settle for a woman on the same level of attractiveness. Many many times I see my unattractive or average friends in long term relationships, or many long term relationships and marrying young to some equal guy. But the very hot and ex model women who were not partying or sleeping around seem to struggle to get decent guys and remain single last. Then guys assume there is something wrong with them because they "ought not be singl" and guys fixate on "why is she single? Something is wrong?" and dont want to have a relationship with them and spend ages fault finding to figure out why they are single. Meanwhile the rich guys trying to buy a temporary arm candy or trophy or living barbie doll just keep coming. Surprisingly depressing. Also just to clarify, I'm talking about the natural looking model types with conventional beauty, beautiful bone structure and face. Not the instagram selfie models or only-fans types.

Ohms2North · 2022-09-13T13:04:47+00:00

Yes, I feel so sorry for young hot women

2022-09-13T14:01:17+00:00

"Add in submission and agreeableness, chances they're going to end up
with the wrong person because they will say yes to one of the guys
swarming her, who is only pretending to be nice or interested in the
same things as her due to wanting her body."

Submission and agreeableness are not virtues. They are common in cowards, conformists, lazy people and are always doing more harm than good. Submissive and agreeable women are harmful for society and almost always end up supporting evil men with their resources and affection, so IMO they end up exactly with the people they deserve. TBH it is their business, but most of the time third parties suffer (friends, families, children). This submissive/agreeable gal is simply an enabler, although many here would call her a victim. Well, you are not a victim if you are not willing to take any moral action.

Not exactly sure if I'm trying to change your mind here. Well, hot women have it easy (on average) so I don't think hotness is a disadvantage in any combination. I think mostly character flaws are at play here. I agree that TRPers are wrong in desiring submissive women. Perhaps what they (or some better portion of them) mean by "submissive" or "agreeable" is simply "not being a narcissistic asshole"?

Affectionate_Sky960 · 2022-09-17T00:26:47+00:00

Hypergamy will price a lot of those women out of the market if you have inifinite options how would you behave. You’d become stuck up it’s better to walk a narrow path than many roads that’s attractive people dating issues.

YaffeAsks · 2022-11-29T05:20:08+00:00

Why do you think that these younger more attractive women will be more agreeable to any of the men swarming them? It is very possible that they will only submit to the man that will show them their value and how they fit within the the cipher of the man. You should check out this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUf6wHQofMo

Title	Young, hot (and submissive) women are at a major disadvantage when it comes to finding a LTR compared to older or less attractive women
Author	Salt_Mathematician24
Upvotes	32
Comments	112
Date	September 12, 2022 1:22 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/xccqzl/young_hot_and_submissive_women_are_at_a_major/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/young-hot-and-submissive-women-are-at-a-major.1131296 https://theredarchive.com/post/1131296

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