Men who couldn't get any women to talk to them to getting women to sleep with you, what changed?

Standard-Metal3161 · 2024-08-16T02:31:52+00:00

Approaching women you find attractive a few times a week and learn the best way to do it, making it feel casual, friendly and not giving desperate vibes

poopiebuttcheeks · 2024-08-16T02:40:08+00:00

I practiced talking to random women with the intent on never hanging with them. The ones who are interested will let you know, so for those ones u put in more effort. If they still deny you, you move on to the next, and the next, and the next. If you talk to 10 women maybe you hook up with 1. So you just keep going and going but don't do it at the same spot. Move around a little. Don't excessively hit on people in one location. Diversify where you hangout and who you talk to

_islander · 2024-08-16T05:09:49+00:00

I started approaching women.

Yes, for years I was stuck in fear of rejection until I said fuck it. Little by little I gained confidence and got better at relating to them and being myself with them.

The sooner you say fuck it, the better.

Samuraibeb0p · 2024-08-16T09:18:15+00:00

I lost weight and started lifting weights

EmperorSillyBilly · 2024-08-16T10:43:23+00:00

Started saying what I want and what I'll do to them etc. In a fun way.

Went to the gym a lot

Apples_into_Snapple · 2024-08-16T11:48:47+00:00

Mentality, persistence, and practice. You need to follow a process that is more geared towards progress rather than “am I gonna be able to fuck this girl?”. Keep a positive mindset, and be forgiving of yourself if you do a bad approach (obviously don’t make bad approaches a habit, learn from them and improve). Most importantly, have fun.

Another very important aspect that I think most guys deny doing but do from time to time: Don’t simp and try to chase a girl. If a girl thinks she can have you whenever she wants, she’ll reject you and at best, she’ll just use you for validation. Don’t be afraid to put girls in their place and make it known that you are the price, and she needs to win you over as well.

MrWolffman · 2024-08-16T12:02:14+00:00

I'm still bad with women but still the most laid guy out of my circle. Now I'm in a relationship too.

The difference between me and my friends is that I take action, they don't.

I've tried to improve my game and social skills but I'm still clumsy. I've just brute forced my way to success basicly. When you shoot your shot on enough people, some of them will like you no matter what.

billoverbeck00 · 2024-08-16T12:26:11+00:00

Actually talking to them, it works wonders

BrutalLee_Honest662 · 2024-08-16T03:35:50+00:00

Having balls, being bold and fearless when it came to approaching, making the first move and going in for the kiss because from what i’ve experienced i realized women are bigger pervs than men and that they’re just as horny or even hornier than us. Thats why girls wear sexy shit in public showing off their massive cleavage & big boobs or booty shorts & yoga pants to show off their big butts. They want the attention so, why not be the guy who’s bold enough to give it to them?

Therefore, there was nothing to overthink anymore, no reason to be scared, no reason to be shy, no reason to be hesitant..The results were always 50/50 .. 50% i got rejected and 50% I was their type and got laid! Next thing I know i was out there unhooking and peeling off bras and pulling thongs to the side!

DaygameCode · 2024-08-16T14:02:31+00:00

You start tallin to many of them. That’s how it works. You grow balls and approach them. Women aren’t the ones who do the approach, it’s the guy who has to initiate everything. That is why you don’t wait for women to approach you or signal that they want you to approach. You simply approach because you are a man who goes after what he wants even when there is no signals of interests at all. That’s how all men who have success do it, by not caring if they get rejected or not and just doing it anyway, even when the odds do not seem to be in their favour.

czfreak · 2024-08-16T02:40:40+00:00

I lost a lot of weight and did steroids. I also partied alot so i was putting myself into situations that made it easy to meet those kind of girls

pouyamota · 2024-08-16T10:39:04+00:00

How many of the chics you approached cold have been rude?

Cactus2711 · 2024-08-16T06:54:12+00:00

I researched self esteem and how to build it. Once you do, no-one can take it away from you. I now understand my value and that is something women are extremely attracted to

aFalseSlimShady · 2024-08-16T03:21:12+00:00

I joined the Marines 😂

Ninjarro · 2024-08-16T03:37:38+00:00

Confidence

Pyroftw3 · 2024-08-16T14:34:49+00:00

i always had women trying to talk to me in some regard, but since i lost weight got some muscle and got better facial hair and haircut, as well as just being more confident/chill/approachable it is way easier now.

Being like a person that people want to talk to helps a lot, downside is if you introverted like me random people trying to talk to you get a bit anoying

DreadlockMohawke · 2024-08-16T06:09:22+00:00

Basically, never gave up. Kept trying till I figured it out. Built myself to be the best version of me that I could, got my head on right (Inner game) and took it one step at a tike... I.e.: 1. Learn to open. 2. Hold engaging conversation. 3. Learn Kino. 4. Learn to Escalate etc...

All the information is out there. Have patience, have fun and be respectful. Everything will change.

CoBudemeRobit · 2024-08-16T09:17:21+00:00

Mostly mindshift change, first it was everyone has to like me. Second was I trust that Im not bad therefore take it or leave it

RedditSellsMyInfo · 2024-08-16T19:51:03+00:00

What helped the most was focusing less on pickup and worked on myself. Go to therapy. Work on being fulfilled in life. Don't try to chase "happiness" and "success" in the western sense. It doesn't work( there's research on this but I'm on a phone and can't find the paper) .

There's a few quick fixes that might help in the short term. That's the outer game tactics that are common on here. The rest is inner game. People want to be around happy, fulfilled, fun and kind people.

Also, having close female friends is super important to getting over feeling creepy. You should have at least one platonic female friend who you can talk about dating and feelings to. Even if she's really unnatractive and you just game with.

agentStag · 2024-08-16T14:46:23+00:00

I was never that bad but what improved my game drastically was becoming an overall nice person to be around then hitting the gym. Making money helps but only after the first few dates and if you wanna get into a relationship.

But ay, hit the gym guys! Don't believe the "dad bod is the new thing" B's. Get ripped and you'll see some wild shit happen to you(borderline SA to be honest).

No-Wolverine7793 · 2024-08-16T16:09:41+00:00

Just talk to everyone doesn't mater if it's the gal bagging your groceries or the person serving your drinks just talk to em

CalmEntrepreneur884 · 2024-08-16T16:18:46+00:00

You gotta be aware of the concept of covert and overt neediness, basically approach them without expecting anything to happen at all

TonyRavioli24 · 2024-08-16T18:28:10+00:00

Elevated confidence and self esteem. I see a lot of "approaching women" comments which is true, but chances are you probably won't even approach if you have zero confidence - and worse if you approach and get blown out you probably won't do it again or will approach from a frame of desperation and seeking validation. Get your mind right and most everything else falls into place.

r_gui · 2024-08-16T22:41:21+00:00

I had to change. Figure which styles make me look and feel best. Hitting the gym. Reading more and talking to people more. Not just women. Believe it or not, women are people, too. So, learning to make people laugh and feel comfortable around you is super helpful. I even noticed that now (especially in clubs), I get approached. Usually, after laughing and connecting with a group of people. Outside of that scene, just talk to random girls and speak with confidence. Complement from your chest. Don't just say "I like your eyes." Say something like "your eyes remind me of a peaceful world I've only dreamed of." Lean into your cheesy poetic side. So yeah, reading and being more human changed everything.

The-Royal-Fork · 2024-08-17T02:00:47+00:00

Only hit on the women who eye-fuck you across the rooms you’re in

Working_Potential_26 · 2024-08-16T16:15:55+00:00

Honestly bro … I was at rock bottom .. I couldn’t even text .. lol couldn’t even hold a conversation ..

I used to be a beast with girls in high school, middle school. until I went through chronic depression (childhood shit caught up to my mind )

I lost my own version of my self and that I call rock bottom… I had anxiety and depression .. before I was charismatic .. quick witted , and charming ..

I did shrooms.. had to rewrite my brain it seemed.. I took off all negative energy around me so I can rebuild myself.. I let go of the obvious fake friends .. I knew that to get the women I want .. to get the friends I want.. I have to be similar to my standards…

I also dropped real estate .. I was doing well out of high school but I hated it because I was going through this weird phase…

What helped me get my traits back was hanging out with men that knew what they were doing.. being around men that were magnets of abundance .. my cousins are like this and they’re older so I was able to see how they did things up close.. they shared their strategies when it came to touching on women.. talking to women and making bold moves on women.. both of these fellas … women gravitate towards them because they truly are unique men..very brave .. very bold.. all masculine.. great fighters.. even better labor workers.

I learned that I wasn’t doing nothing to set myself apart.. yes I was an athlete but not to any rewarding standards.. I knew how to fight and protect people around me but can people feel that aura off me ? Cause I knew I can see it in my cousins…

I also knew I was still very emotional towards rejection , words, and feeling left out..

I earned thick skin … through putting myself in difficult situations.. that I was able to solve …

I joined football teams above my level and worked my way to gain my spot on the team ..

I got way better at fighting and wrestling

This helped me beat up a 6’4 dude that picked on me .. it truly changed my outlook on myself..

I felt brave again .. I felt calm .. composed .. I can think better under pressure..

On the soccer field it translated also .. I’m always one of the most aggressive player there .. but I’m smart and composed and know when to act .. when to make my move…

Read the body language of the player..

All this translates into my women..

It’s the same mechanics.. I didn’t think of my anxiety anymore .. why ?

Because I became a more attentive man .. calmer.. relaxed because I trust myself more than ever..

My thick skin helps me blow through the ladies NO’s..

I turn No’s into maybes .. and maybes into Yes’s..

They feel my aura .. they love my aggressiveness .. they love how bold I can be..

They love how well spoken I am .. (thanks to real estate) ..

They love that they feel secure and protected around me ..

Women look to my eyes and understand the type of man in front of them..

I also learned to choose the women that already have interest in me..

I’ve been laid so so so many times after I grew out of my cocoon.. no money involved …. I don’t spend money on expensive dates ever…

I know how to fuck them .. which is - #1 in setting you apart from the rest You better learn how to last long …

#2 know how to make them miss you Don’t be predicable and just text.. call them instead

-#3 always lead them .. and be a gentlemen for bonus points it will make em feel at ease ..

#4 don’t use labels.. forget about labels ( friends w benefits , girlfriend , wifey ) Let them know you’re there to enjoy their presence .. it doesn’t have to be a label.. both of you fuck with each other and that should be enough .

5. Don’t offer crazy dates in the first 1-2 months of seeing them.. chill .. let them understand that you’re setting the tone.. you gotta see their true colors and see if you even like them.

6 don’t let them know you’re exclusive to them.. let their mind wonder who else you might be talking to .. you don’t even have to tell them you talk to others.. they will always assume it .. and girls love to compete with others so

7 learn how to listen to them more than you wanna talk..

Girls will tell you how they feel about you .. in little hints..

Let them talk and talk and talk. They will know you’re listening to them and they’ll like it .. as a plus you’re learning the way she ticks ..

8 stay composed man .. be calm .. never be a pushover tho .. but relax when you’re with them.. choose women that make you feel at ease.. not the ones that make you feel like something’s not right

Litenpes · 2024-08-16T15:52:34+00:00

Personal growth through PUA videos. But essentially, it was by not taking things so seriously. Like, it’s not really your all that you are putting out there when attracting women. With a lighthearted attitude anxiety goes away.

Also, by not being simpy at all makes all the difference.

val_br · 2024-08-16T16:04:02+00:00

The country.
The US is absurd when it comes to dating, even going to visit my grandparents in Canada is a major difference.
All the advice on this sub is useless if women just don't give a shit.

Hamzeol_Murf · 2024-08-16T16:47:42+00:00

Keep Approaching Women, Make Notes After Each Interaction. My Friend Did This, I Used His Notes

Sandvicheater · 2024-08-16T19:38:38+00:00

Went from morbidly obese to about 13% body fat (to a point Abs are barely visible)

Holy shit its night and day difference. Like women actually respond attentively and engage in deep conversation even if its topic they have no interest in

Lot of people here hate this cold cruel hard fact: but physical attraction is your foot in the door upon first contact.

aeroaca9 · 2024-08-16T20:44:15+00:00

I started paying

kolko_tolko · 2024-08-16T22:26:48+00:00

Two things: 1. Change of perspective from “does she like me?” to “do I like her?”. Sounds simple, but changed the dynamic from many perspectives. Main ones are: being more focused on her than on myself; not looking desperate in chasing her. 2. Experience of a LTR that failed at the end. After it, I have a perspective of how much more there is in a relationship after the first approach, first date and first sex. So no matter if I want to stop there or develop something further, I can be relaxed about it. I realize this second thing is maybe not so helpful advice, except in a sense of “experience will show you the way”.

Third and generic thing would be, stop with porn. I’m not perfect in this rule by myself either, but the fact is it turns your brain in a “dreamer” instead of a “doer”.

tocepsijufaz · 2024-08-16T03:42:29+00:00

My frontal cortex matured.

hal64 · 2024-08-16T04:40:07+00:00

Stopped watching porn and jerking off and moved to a country with less fat and more feminine women. The motivation to approach became super real.

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2024-08-16T06:25:05+00:00

I never listened to losers. I filled my mind with positive thoughts but to be honest I actually always could get women even at the age of 17 I had girls interested in me but I always wanted to improve become a better man.

TonyRavioli24 · 2024-08-16T03:53:56+00:00

I just talked to a girl today, and we exchanged Instagrams. She followed me on Insta. Then the same night, she unfollowed me. Fckin A.

PureFlames · 2024-08-16T14:57:31+00:00

Getting older, at 18 i struggled but at 23 its easy and i dont need to put in effort anymore for girls

thr0w4w4y69_ · 2024-08-16T17:35:27+00:00

As teenager: skinny, braces, buzzcut with weird head shape, no facial hair, eyebrows gone from eczema, no confidence, shy

In my 20’s: gained some muscle from weight lifting in the gym, grew hair out and kept it curly (something for girls to grab on to), grew a beard, braces came off, better fashion sense, chains, dog tags, rings, bracelets, colognes, improved skincare routine that grew back eyebrows

Got more confident and flirted with girls, accepted rejection and pursued the girls that returned interest. Watched stand up to learn how to be funny and make girls laugh. Made eye contact, stared at their lips, smiled at them.

Before losing my virginity I bought condoms and learnt how to put it on. Then I masturbated with it on to practise staying hard for 20-30 minutes. I also bought one of those fake vagina toys.

Literally practised fucking it with the condom on with lube. Then practised eating the pussy/clit, rubbing the clit and fingering the vagina. Money well spent to not feel as inexperienced during my first time (which was still nerve racking tbh).

FIVE_6_MAFIA · 2024-08-16T17:59:12+00:00

Stopped caring about the outcome

2024-08-16T18:24:45+00:00

Age, weight loss, gym, lexapro, dating abroad

JustNefariousness625 · 2024-08-16T18:25:48+00:00

Confident directness, BDE

AzizLiIGHT · 2024-08-16T20:06:50+00:00

You guys need to understand that literally all it takes is some basic grooming, hygiene and a modicum of social aptitude. That is all it takes. seriously

Kzo23 · 2024-08-16T21:25:08+00:00

Being more secure with yourself and having confidence

thebluefireknight · 2024-08-16T22:48:14+00:00

Exercised and got in shape. Felt more confident looked better.

PMA9696 · 2024-08-17T00:22:50+00:00

Losing weight, taking wayyy better care of my appearance, getting better hobbies...just lead to more organic interactions with women and better self esteem.

Hot_Celery5657 · 2024-08-17T08:44:12+00:00

I started paying for women to sleep with me

Melodic_Sir4414 · 2024-08-16T06:56:36+00:00

ive never asked a woman out in my life and been with many. they all approached or asked me. learning game is a meme

2024-08-16T18:09:12+00:00

Nothing, I haven't fucked in 10 years lol

Tipsy247 · 2024-08-16T23:25:32+00:00

Made more Money

2024-08-17T01:14:50+00:00

I got taller. Late growth spurt

snappop69 · 2024-08-17T01:38:43+00:00

Self Confidence is the key. Work on improving yourself to boost your self confidence.

Manapouri33 · 2024-08-17T04:59:12+00:00

You know it lol

timjohnbrad11 · 2024-09-09T00:56:13+00:00

Learning to be comfortable talking to strangers - literally just talk to everyone and you’ll see it’s not a big deal

aj_winnington · 2024-08-16T06:12:44+00:00

I started selling weed.

I also eventually realized what works for me and what doesn’t after trial and error.

Title	Men who couldn't get any women to talk to them to getting women to sleep with you, what changed?
Author	King_Rob77
Upvotes	278
Comments	154
Date	August 16, 2024 2:25 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1etdjke/men_who_couldnt_get_any_women_to_talk_to_them_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/men-who-couldnt-get-any-women-to-talk-to-them-to.1527382 https://theredarchive.com/post/1527382

Comments

5. Don’t offer crazy dates in the first 1-2 months of seeing them.. chill .. let them understand that you’re setting the tone.. you gotta see their true colors and see if you even like them.

6 don’t let them know you’re exclusive to them.. let their mind wonder who else you might be talking to .. you don’t even have to tell them you talk to others.. they will always assume it .. and girls love to compete with others so

7 learn how to listen to them more than you wanna talk..

8 stay composed man .. be calm .. never be a pushover tho .. but relax when you’re with them.. choose women that make you feel at ease.. not the ones that make you feel like something’s not right