I guess what my real issue is you’ll hear plenty of women say ew don’t approach me at the so so location….Whatever that’s perfectly fine. But how in the hell am I supposed to know who’s willing to be approached or not? It’s quite literally a gamble talking to any woman if they’re open to being approached in the first place.

Let’s say we’re at the gym. You’re not wearing a Mixer style wristband (I went to a mixer/singles event recently where you wore red wristband for being taken/unavailable, grey for complicated, green for explicitly single) , you don’t have a sticker on your shoulder with ✅ or ❌ on it saying you’re open to being approached, yet just as many women say they’re open to being approached by the right one and more importantly, the right way like on the way out the gym or *not in the middle of directly working out, like on their phones *.

They also say don’t approach if she has headphones in….have you been to the gym? 97% of people in there are wearing headphones or earbuds. That 3% is usually the staff selling you shit or checking you in. There’s literally almost no reason nobody (male or female) wouldn’t have their headphones on in the gym. So, what then? That’s like if I said on the gym intercom “everyone not wearing underwear , come to the lobby to receive 100$!”. How in the fuck am I supposed to verify that without checking?Just don’t talk to women at the gym? You know what, okay let’s go with that.

When DO we approach then? Even at night clubs and bars plenty are quick to say they’re just out to have a good time with their girlfriends…. By all means that’s fine but again…. WHEN?? That’s literally as public and social as it gets. That’s the one location you do NOT go if you loathe being approached cuz what tf else do you expect to happen ? Chances are 7/10 one of the girls in your group is really good for getting free drinks off guys anyways so be fr dude.

I’m honestly of the opinion we shouldn’t listen to women regarding location for the most part (definitely not near their place of residence , or their car) , just keep it brief , try to make a decent impression , preferably approach when there’s a mutually established …public interest? Like idk waiting in line at a movie theater, walking around Bath and Body Works, in the toys section at Walmart where single moms go, that kinda thing. That’s what I wanna debate about.

And most of all don’t over stay your welcome and be willing to leave at the first sign of disinterest or uncooperative behavior. As long as it’s in an area where you both can disengage pretty easily , it’s best to leave her your number so she can decide if she’s interested and shows you’re confident enough to be okay with having gained nothing from this interaction if she didn’t like you. Women aren’t a monolith, but that won’t stop them from trying to speak for other women .

Don’t gimme wrong, I’m good on picking up “the look” at night clubs and approaching and disengaging when they seem disinterested, usually I’ll alleviate some of the pressure by saying “please don’t lemme ruin your time if I’m impeding or interrupting “ in a funny way to throw some humor in the air and let her confirm if she’s open to communicating or just wants to go have fun or isnt interested , it’s all good Lol. But location doesn’t matter as much as social context.