"They're like brother and sister"

Optimal_Grapefruit_5 · 2021-06-07T23:38:45+00:00

Lol anecdotal but the guy who kept going on and on about how I was "like a sister" to him one day candidly told me he was thankful I'd agreed to see him by ourselves because he could just rape me anytime - and then he tried to kiss me. With tongue. Idk that doesn't sound like sibling stuff to me.

Edit: he also knew I had a boyfriend

Pahapan · 2021-06-08T00:46:12+00:00

They don't get to watch incest porn and then use the ol' "she's like my sister!" line to excuse their weirdly close relationship.

GalsofWisconsin · 2021-06-07T21:11:00+00:00

Brother and Sister in question = Cersei and Jaime Lannister

EurasianEmpress · 2021-06-08T01:59:54+00:00

Every guy who referred to me as “like a sister” or “like my 2-year old” tried to get with me.

hologothic · 2021-06-07T23:05:39+00:00

Just gonna say, Hailey and Justin were like 'brother and sister' while he was still with Selena. 😂

The sister-friend is just a pickme waiting in the shadows to pounce when an opportunity arises.

amhran_oiche · 2021-06-07T22:22:17+00:00

So whose brother and sister are they like?

This SENT me. And the fact that your friend, along with every other woman in this situation, can't name a single brother and sister like this is TELLING. Men ALWAYS want something!!

throwawaypls2020 · 2021-06-08T00:48:51+00:00

I actually have another side to this view. I have a male friend that I've known since we were teenagers (we're both approaching 40 now). We never had any romantic or sexual tension, and of course never had sex/kiss/cuddling/holding hands, noone ever suggested any of these, it's weird even imagining it, and I know he feels the same. We go for lunch/dinner/movie/trips together, sometimes with other friends, sometimes without.

I grew up in an abusive household, so he's like a family I never had, we supported each other mentally & emotionally. There was never any jealousy/insecurity on either side, we're happy for each other to get into a relationship with others. Noone's stringing the other along, and the dynamic is very very consistent between us over the years (purely familial/platonic).

He's single now, but when he has a girlfriend or wife, I'm more than happy to take a step back from the friendship. And if she'll accept me, I would love her to be my family & my people too.

I do however, agree that this is extremely rare, but usually you'll know once you see them together (most notably if the woman is trying to bond with you or trying to dominate conversation/leaving you out or "assert dominance" in any other way).

HottPinkSlug · 2021-06-07T22:42:40+00:00

They've sexualized the word 'sister' now, so who the fuck even knows anymore

frustratedmarxistfem · 2021-06-07T21:34:42+00:00

I just posted about this actually but just came out of a dating situation with one of these. Dont do it. Very rarely, very very rarely, is a man ever friends with a woman he doesn't want to fuck.

They tell us all the time. The friend zone. The "orbiters". Men know they do this and tell on themselves. Think about it. Men don't waste time just for the company of women, they don't like us that much. They always want something.

berrylikeova · 2021-06-07T22:15:24+00:00

I have a brother. We don’t take trips together or have sleepovers! We briefly shared a 2 bedroom apartment and we argued every day 😆

My brother is my best friend. Everybody, ourselves included, note that we are closer than many siblings.

I quarantined with him and his family for 3 months at the beginning of the pandemic. I even moved states to be near them. I see his wife and kids once a week and him thrice a month because of work schedules.

So we’re close is the point. But what you’re describing with your friends husband and “like a sister” that is not a brother/sister dynamic.

souredskittles · 2021-06-07T21:59:41+00:00

Nah fam. They say it themselves: they can’t be just friends with women.

romancingthevoid · 2021-06-08T01:08:11+00:00

There's a Twitch streamer I've watched called Destiny (a guy) who once said women have two categories of men - ones they would fuck and ones who they consider friends, and those two groups never overlap. Men just have an order of which of their female "friends" they want to fuck first. Stay woke.

Lazy-Tax3986 · 2021-06-08T06:33:25+00:00

No "like-a-sister"s, no exes-turned-"best-friends" scenario, nope nope nope, not for me.

Thestral-glow6 · 2021-06-07T21:40:36+00:00

Exactly. It’s just an excuse for men to emotionally (and probably physically) cheat, flirt and get attention under the guise of “wE’rE jUSt FrIeNdS” .. They lose their sh*t if you even look in the direction of another guy though 🙃

thecrazywitch31 · 2021-06-08T09:01:50+00:00

Nah. I don't believe in Sister-Brother dynamic. Unless they are together like brothers and sisters since they were kids or something.

Most of the times the guys who are the so called brothers will hit on you when the opportunity arises. I used to talk to a guy who called me my "sister". He had a girlfriend at that time, but we hanged out a lot. Sometimes me with him and his gf, sometimes him and his other friends. Most of them knew me and he always introduced others to me as his "sister".

However, one year later I lost some weight and I was suddenly "visible" to people idk. It was raining and he was in my area to ask for a notebook and I went to give it to him. Months later he confessed that on that day he wanted to kiss me. He said he never felt like that until THAT particular day.

And that cringed me to the core. I had a lot of pick-me tendencies then, so I didn't end it completely then. But yeah, after that, I refuse to be "like a sister" to someone. All they do is make us do emotional labour and make you a mediator between him and his gf. A lot of times I had been asked to "look after his gf because she isn't feeling well' and I went 🤡

My brother and I have a really good relationship, and also with my cousin brothers who are all very decent and care for me a lot. I refuse to give any scrote the status equivalent to them and pollute the pure brother sister relationship.

Praximaros · 2021-06-07T21:50:28+00:00

It’s bs the majority of the time. Men rarely form attachments or even pay attention to women they aren’t attracted to. Most men understand this when it comes to their own wives and girlfriends forming friendships with other men. You can trust that he won’t outright cheat on you, but don’t fool yourself into thinking “they’re like brother and sister” because almost every time he totally would if he could.

msromperstomper · 2021-06-08T07:45:10+00:00

So a guy I thought I was seeing told me after we had sex that we were "just like brother and sister" and he had no feelings for me. So either he was into incestuous relationships or chalk this up to some weird subcategory of porn.

ellaykim · 2021-06-08T00:08:47+00:00

I won’t date a man who has close female friends. In my experience there is always some questionable history (previous hook up or relationship). Most women intuitively know this but are gaslit to believe they’re “jealous and insecure” if they see it as an issue. My ex had a female friend and swore there was nothing between them. I didn’t want to be seen as “crazy” so I quieted my inner voice and assumed the CoolGirl role. I came to find out that yep, they hooked up! Men don’t want women friends, they want women to have sex with. There may be some exceptions but for me, it’s a no 🚩

Mysterious_Service_1 · 2021-06-08T04:28:35+00:00

This, this, this!

orangechickengeneral · 2021-06-08T02:16:21+00:00

Straight men don't do sleepovers or go on trips with women they don't want to have sex with.

haunted_vcr · 2021-06-08T08:48:52+00:00

I think there can be above board, close HV friendships between men and women.

Should these friends ever take priority over or have more intimacy than a spouse? No! That doesn't happen with close same sex friendships.

Also true opposite gender friendships are incredibly rare. If you get the vibe they want to bone, they do.

Bravenpeace1384 · 2021-06-08T02:49:40+00:00

I dated a guy who had a “sister” I was not a fan. It of course caused a problem when she would call him about her abusive ex and one night he ended up fighting with him when he showed up at her house and my bf got his nose broke. I got mad. Then his “sister” jumped in my inbox and told me how I should feel in my relationship, all about their special bond, and how she knew him better than I did. When I made it clear that wasn’t okay, he sided with her, assumed I was in the wrong when she was nasty to me. That is a NEVER AGAIN for me. Close female friends and relationships are just drama waiting to happen.

fireforestfairy · 2021-06-08T17:04:27+00:00

"Brother and sister relarionships" = emotional cheating disguised as platonic friendships. Scrotes will of course deny they've been emotionally cheating and hence label the relationship as "friendship".

starfighter07 · 2021-06-08T08:04:43+00:00

Well, I think I have this relationship with my only boy friend from nearly 10 years ! He is gay so I think it's not the same dynamic as the one you're describing which is clearly suspicious. I don't mean he is cheating of course but how many couples I see going on with a third wheel by their side, always making comments and judgement about what is happening in the relationship... definitely pay attention to iintrusive people.

BBQCoolRanchQueen · 2021-06-08T17:58:28+00:00

That's a line commonly used by male orbiters. They're faking a whole ass friendship in hopes of sex down the road. Bonus points if they use that line to quell any suspicions of cheating with said "she's like a sister" line.

vvioletwwitch · 2021-06-08T08:29:47+00:00

When I was a bit younger I was in a relationship with another woman and the two of us befriended a guy who we both became really close with. I considered him to be like a brother, we hung out a lot but it was always platonic and good fun. Turns out he had a crush on my girlfriend the whole time, after we broke up he started dating her and totally stopped speaking to me. Now I will always be extremely suspicious of men claiming to want to be a platonic friend.

_laufaeson · 2021-06-07T23:53:34+00:00

I’m interested in these comments because that’s the kind of relationship I’ve got with not only my ex husband but one of my best friends. I’ve never really thought it’s weird. And I’ve already gone down that path with the ex husband and I know nothing but unhappiness is down that way. BFF is married and I’ve never felt that way about him. So they’re both harmless to any new potential man in my life.

Title	"They're like brother and sister"
Author	Lost_Kale90
Upvotes	95
Comments	55
Date	June 7, 2021 9:09 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/nuno0t/theyre_like_brother_and_sister/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/theyre-like-brother-and-sister.781432 https://theredarchive.com/post/781432

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