TIL that if a 35 year old woman has sex with a 14 year old boy and gets pregnant, he despite being a minor will have to pay her child support. Start 3:42

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Does it really cause of lack of sensitivity?

Absolutely. Anybody who told you that it is untrue is highly misinformed. Haven't you ever heard uncircumcised guys talk about their foreskin in regards to sex? Hell, if you even search for your circumcision scar you'll find it's a lot more sensitive than the rest of the penis.

I thought it was done for health concerns such as for hygienic purposes?

Again, bullshit. Circumcision began in America due to an old wives tale that suggested it would prevent masturbation. Which it obviously doesn't, but people didn't know any better back then, so they figured they'd better go choppin' off body parts rather than let their pubescent sons do anything sexual. After that, the traditional "Well, I guess I want him to look like me" opinion from fathers and the infuriating "I don't like the way uncut dicks look" from mothers helped perpetuate the process. If you actually wash yourself properly, there is nothing more unhygienic about a foreskin than there is about an asshole or, more accurately, a vagina. We don't cut off labia so that women's vaginas are more clean, do we?

I suggest you read up some more here if you want a professional's take on this. Also, pay close attention to these two comments.

If you have a free hour or so while driving, I implore you to at least listen to this podcast. Even if you don't look at any of the links I'm giving you, please listen to this, even for a bit. It's heartbreaking. The guest on this podcast also wrote this book that I have yet to read, so I can't testify to it's effectiveness.

That's pretty much all of the material I have for you. Well there is one more thing, but it's unrelated to the negative effects of circumcision. The reason that hospitals and doctors tend to ignore all of this information on circumcision is pretty sickening. I've heard stories of parents who repeatedly told their doctors that they didn't want their son to be circumcised and yet the hospital still tried to schedule the operation. It seems that many hospitals sell human foreskins to lotion manufacturers.

If you go to other parts of the world, you'll learn that many countries, it is the norm to be uncut. Foreigners often think it's bizarre how all Americans practice circumcision.

What it all comes down to, though, is that you cannot make the decision for your infant son to be circumcised. You cannot force his consent and he cannot give it at that age. It's an unneseccary operation and it's barbaric that we still practice it in hospitals and clinics yet we decry the circumcision of women in third world countries. Female Genital Mutilation is certainly a big problem and needs to be put to an end, but we practice Male Genital Mutilation every day in one of the world's largest first-world countries, yet nobody even bats an eyelash.

Edit: Also, I recommend to anybody reading who is considering having their son circumcised, you must watch a video of a circumcision being performed if you're even considering it. I feel like that should be a requirement. It's soul-crushing.

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I'm new to the circumcision debate, but haven't made up my mind yet, I'll probably just not do it to my son. Anyways it's still somewhat more acceptable socially to have a circumcised penis I feel. I have heard much more instances of "I would prefer a cut dick" than "I would prefer one that was uncut." Although this is bias in that it is from personal experience and I assume most women won't care. I don't know, the jury is also still out on whether it feels better to be uncut (although I have seen much more evidence to show that it does feel better). I wish I could uncircumcise myself to see what it was like. Also in researching for this comment I found this article that suggests that I may have a strange aversion to my son looking different than me. But I can't shake the feeling that if he is circumcised he will never know the difference and will also be free from any locker room bullying or women getting weirded out by their lack of experience in the uncut department. Here's hoping that society will just go ahead and change before I have to make the decision so I don't have to worry.

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Yes, while the government tries to put the interests of the kids first

This is the mantra that gets repeated by all the defenders of unjust child support arrangements, that it's "about what's best for the child, not what's best for the parents".

The only problem is it's bullshit.

If we only cared about what was best for the child, the government would be making child support payments in place of ones missed by deadbeat parents...but no, that doesn't happen.

If we cared about what was best for the child, we'd require accountability as to how child support funds were spent. i.e. no spa days for mommy or sports cars for daddy, it would be receipts showing the money was spent on the kid. But we dont' give a rats ass how child support money is actually spent.

If we cared only about the needs of the child, there would be no variable support based on income...needs are needs after all.

So, yeah...this "what's best for the child" is a polite fiction. Everyone knows it's not true, it's just a way to say "shut up and pay what we tell you to pay" without admitting how broken the system is.

[–]Not_An_Ambulance 12 points13 points14 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Okay... read that article and then read the article it's discussing... neither actually asserts which states they're talking about. I'm an attorney and I'm going to explain how this works in my state.

Only women can choose to have an abortion. This is for the entire United States.

What the rape victim gets to decide though, is if the rapist is permitted to have parental rights or not. With parental rights comes the right to visitation and the obligation to support the child.

Now, this whole thing is only easily done if the rapist is already convicted. If they are, then it's an easy, rubber stamp type of thing. Even if they were paying for everything (the last one I did for free, honestly) it would probably come out to around $700 in attorneys fees to have this done.

If the rapist somehow is not convicted, there would be more problems though... because while there is a nice, long list of reasons one's parental rights can be cut off... the judge is going to want to see more evidence, and it would probably take more effort.

But, yeah... my state gives the victim choices.

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It's how the laws are written. Lawmakers focus a lot on money and enforcement of child support payments has been tied to welfare benefits for the child and custodial parent since the child support enforcement program was added to the social security act in 1975. Since then, lawmakers have spent a LOT of time and effort closing minor loopholes to make sure they pay as little welfare as possible while forcing as much child support payments as possible. There's just not much legal discretion in those decisions.

In contrast, there is a ton of legal discretion in custody and visitation cases because it's really hard to write laws that cover the ridiculously messy domestic situations and shades of dysfunction that show up in court. Judges have to choose who to believe and are legally supposed to find the least crappy resolution.

While a it's easy to talk about a rapist and visitation rights, each case is so complicated, the outcome probably hinges on boring details that would never make the news in most cases.

Anyway, my point is that child support enforcement is tied to welfare benefits and is a heck if a lot more black and white (legally) than visitation rights. That's probably not fair, but it will always be easier to track child support payments and tie them to welfare payments than to pick apart which of two parents has which mental health or addiction problems and should have what level of custody or visitation rights.

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You are effectively forcing a parental relationship between them

No, you're enforcing the rights the one parent already has by nature. And there's no reason for the parents to ever meet. Although of course in fact the courts simply do not enforce child visitation anyway. But they ought to. What you are arguing happens, doesn't ever happen.

not only is he in a forced relationship with his victim

Did you mean to call the boy a rapist there?

And again there's no relationship between him and his rapist. They never have to meet. Even if he wants to meet his child.

these situations are similar

Yes he was raped and he has a child by his rapist and the rapist has custody of his child and can hold that over him. THAT aspect is similar but much worse for the man (because nobody says a male rapist ought to get custody of the child, only visitation).

But the stuff about paying CS is all added on top of that and is dissimilar because there's no good reason to do it whatsoever.

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