So I've been seeing this guy for a while now (3 months). He seems to be high value (has hobbies, tries to keep himself fit, polite, has a great career, plans and pays for high effort dates, etc). We've been on dozens of dates because we meet each other at least twice a week so I thought it's time to have the exclusivity talk as I'm starting to develop feelings. I don't want to develop feelings under the assumption that we are getting there. I want to make things clear before my feelings grow any deeper.
During our first date, he said he's looking for a relationship and specifically asked me if I plan on staying in the country for the long run because that's his plan and he wants to see if we have the same goal (which we did at that time). He even called us a "beginning of a couple" before we both went on a week-long holiday (separately). I figured after the trip is the best time to ask him what he thinks about us after we spent time away from each other.
Lo and behold after our holiday, he said he doesn't have plans to date exclusively anytime soon and just enjoys my company. He also mentioned that he's not sure if he wants to stay in the country where we're at in the long term. He then said he likes me and still wants to continue seeing each other. He already set up a next date which I have not accepted yet (no plans on accepting because what's the point?).
I don't understand why he will waste both of our time like this. Clearly, he can tell by the third or fourth date if we aren't suited for each other. We are very much alike and he keeps on saying we have great chemistry and that he likes me very much.
We haven't slept together so maybe he's playing the long game? I don't understand him at all. The red flag I noted is that he had just broken up from an LTR 4 months before we met but he explained that the relationship was dead long before the break up so I gave it a chance. I normally avoid guys who have just gotten out of LTR because most of the time dating them doesn't end well. Also, I recently learned that his ex is the same race as I am and my race is normally a fetish of white men.
I'm taking a break from dating (such a waste of time) and I'm never dating another guy who got out of a relationship recently again.
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