Would you associate being single as a bad thing? Why or why not?

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-02-07T02:50:55+00:00

No oh, it also depends on the reason why, if somebody is single because they genuinely want to be single and enjoy their free time and not have to deal with the things that go into a relationship , awesome.

If somebody is an incel (like a real incel not one of these average-looking guys that just needs to dress better and do push-ups) they deserve our sympathy

swaggyquack · 2022-02-07T04:27:47+00:00

Nope, not bad at all

John_Oakman · 2022-02-07T02:36:47+00:00

Given the social nature of human beings, the answer depends on said individual's relation with the rest of society. It's fully possible to be lifelong single while still contributing greatly to society, and conversely it's possible for an individual to be in long term relationships while being a total detriment to all those around.

Sure-Vermicelli4369 · 2022-02-07T03:37:06+00:00

I don't think so, but there's still a stigma about it regardless.

42nanaimobars · 2022-02-07T03:16:33+00:00

I think being single for life without having casual flings is alright. (Think of Matthew in “Anne of Green Gables” (1985). He never got in a relationship. He never married. He ended up adopting a daughter and had a good life. He was an unusual, but kind movie character. Marilla, on the other hand, lived with some regrets in regards to dating. She was also a very kind person who got fulfillment in raising Anne.)

Bekiala · 2022-02-07T02:35:24+00:00

I am pretty much single for life but no casual flings. It is what works for me.

luv_ya · 2022-02-07T03:05:12+00:00

Just sounds very depressing. I know both sides of women and men like to hate on eachother and constantly fight over who needs the other more but honestly as a man just having no relationship or family in the future doesnt sound fun to me. Male loneliness hits hard, girls usually have greater social nets with friends and such so the only person I can truly depend on in the future would be my wife. Being single is very freeing as well though and takes away some stress of having to meet certain standards because only you are judging yourself, but I feel like going through the extra effort of bettering myself and getting a wife shows more rewards than being single does.

figuringMylife · 2022-02-07T16:26:41+00:00

if being single were so bad we’d be born in relationships

goatismycopilot · 2022-02-07T03:26:05+00:00

I have two words for you

LEONARDO DICAPRIO

I will follow in his footsteps and achieve greatness and success just like him while smashing 26 year olds for the rest of my life.

MedschoolStacy · 2022-02-07T08:34:53+00:00

My plan is actually to stay single for the rest of my life and focus on my career. I've found relationships to be detrimental to my mental health.

decoy88 · 2022-02-07T06:36:11+00:00

This is my perspective. I loved being single, until I met someone that offered to enhance my life by pairing up with them.

Single is a bad outcome I guess if you have life goals of wanting biological children. I think that’s overrated though.

chromie96 · 2022-02-07T08:48:42+00:00

For me personally, yes. While I loved the ability to have casual hookups, I am a romantic at heart. I've always wanted to find a person and settle down. Though not everyone feels the same. I wouldn't look at a single person and feel pity because that could be what they want in life

iamthemovie1992 · 2022-02-07T14:04:52+00:00

Nope. That sounds like a win to me tbh

ThisTimeForRealYo · 2022-02-07T17:44:54+00:00

It doesn’t matter what we think. Live your life the way you want. Noone will come barging down your door being all angry and upset that you’re single.

TonytheNetworker · 2022-02-07T02:48:23+00:00

I’ve been single most of my life and it’s been decent, more freedom and spontaneity .As a guy I think it’s a little more easier to have casual flings with no one judging your lifestyle.

Pola_Lita · 2022-02-07T02:35:01+00:00

It could definitely be better than a lot of lifestyles, but nothing in the world is better than the feeling of intimacy with someone who really knows you and vice versa.

DrinkItInMan11 · 2022-02-07T03:55:28+00:00

Single with casual flings I'd the perfect lifestyle, there's no benefits to getting into a committed relationship.

lonely_mixtape · 2022-02-07T05:31:37+00:00

No. Even though marriage and having a family has always been my dream, there's a lot more stuff I would be able to do if I was single for life. I could be happy both ways. I actually had a whole alternate "back-up plan" in case I never found the one for me. Might still have to fall back on it some day lol. I don't do flings tho.

Booexgirlfriend · 2022-02-07T03:41:39+00:00

Would you associate being single as a bad thing?

Yes, I would.

Why or why not?

I believe is a bad thing when the decision is made by somebody else. A healthy relationship is better than being single.

If you could be single for life, and have casual flings, would you look at that as a bad outcome?

This is a good question. No, wouldn't be a bad outcome but is not what I want. My body will get ugly and wrinkled as I age.

For how long will I be able to get casual flings? Will my libido be so high as now? Would it matters?

Casual flings are not my style anyway.

PM_ME_ZED_BARA · 2022-02-07T04:25:15+00:00

I don’t consider it a bad outcome. It was how I was before I am in a current relationship. But I much prefer being in a relationship that satisfies me.

Ppdstillmental · 2022-02-07T04:46:14+00:00

For me it got old. My best life is with a partner.

DerekMorganBAU · 2022-02-07T03:26:02+00:00

That’s the best life to live.

You can get all of the benefits of being in a relationship with multiple partners and you’re not tied down to one.

Dream would be to live with 3 of them at once but oh well in my fantasies

TodTheRod01 · 2022-02-07T03:32:30+00:00

Male or female? What age? How good looking are they? Do they have a job? If so what? How long have they been single?

2022-02-07T04:31:13+00:00

I had only one unhappy relationship during which I wanted to be single but being in a good relationship is better in every way than single. So yeah it would bother me.

lady_ven0m · 2022-02-07T04:42:53+00:00

I’ve learned to appreciate both seasons. Relationships are nice when they work, and being by yourself is great too because you can just focus on yourself.

throwaway316stunner · 2022-02-07T05:41:19+00:00

I get the double whammy, single for life and not even good enough for casual flings.

ogsimpology · 2022-02-07T14:16:50+00:00

Yes. Why? Not because it's inherently bad, but it usually signals lack of sufficient value you provide, or the height of your standards. Either isn't really a gokd thing.

I don't know many interesting, smart, good looking people that are single. And the ones that are, are by choice.

ThisBoringLife · 2022-02-07T16:12:17+00:00

If you don't care for having a family, then it's not a bad thing.

If you do...then yeah.

I mean, having a degree of socializing and connection that goes beyond party pick up lines and one night stands I believe everyone should have.

Insidious-Sid · 2022-02-07T16:15:10+00:00

Any man who has the sexual relationships he desires without paying the incredibly steep cost (personal, financial, spiritual, emotional, physical) of cohabiting with a woman, I'd say that's a very very successful man.

Any man posing as successful who had to go the Beta Bux "Pay for Play" transactional relationship route is not successful but a loser dressed up as a winner.

A truly successful men commits to nobody yet still gets what he wants.

FilmStew · 2022-02-07T04:27:50+00:00

Yes, it might sound better when you’re younger but if you just continue on the path of casual flings the studies show that people who are alone in their 50’s are the most depressed.

nick1812216 · 2022-02-07T03:32:01+00:00

I would look at that as a bad outcome. I want a partner! And also, as a single guy society does regard you with suspicion/caution. People/society are a lot more accepting/forgiving/friendly if you have a gf or wife IMHO

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-02-07T04:17:14+00:00

Not at all. I'm married now, but it was never a goal in and of itself. I don't see the point in being in a relationship unless there's someone I actually want one with.

AutoModerator · 2022-02-07T02:21:01+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

thetruthishere_ · 2022-02-07T04:17:51+00:00

No, as long as they are good casual relations.

Im not into casual but I know good casual relations exist and I think you can still be very intimate even on a casual level.

heyitsjeape · 2022-02-07T05:10:47+00:00

No. I am single though. I’m sure a lot of people who are married are pretty miserable in their own way. I’m sure many seemingly happy married people are also in denial or feel pressure to outwardly misrepresent. That is not to say I’d want to be single if I could choose but there are some upsides.

TheElusivePeacock · 2022-02-07T06:51:35+00:00

Hell no, that’s my goal!

SwimmingAd9458 · 2022-02-07T08:26:24+00:00

Being single or taken have both their ups and downs. One should learn to appreciate the good parts that come with either being single or taken. I usually see many people being constantly sad about not being in a relationship/not being single anymore which is a bit immature I guess. Although imho there's nothing wrong with wanting and working towards having a relationship when you're single. Also if you don't feel good with your partner and want the single life back, maybe you should break up because your longing might make your partner feel bad.

Gravel_Roads · 2022-02-07T09:15:36+00:00

I don't think it's a "bad thing", but it's not what I would want. I've done casual before, but not regularly because it frankly takes a lot of work to constantly be meeting new people, finding ones that are compatible with you, screening them for sanity, trying to decide if it's better or worse to bring them home or go to their place, or to blow money on a motel ect ect.

I'll take my LTR any day. I know I like them, that they like me, and we already know what one another likes.

RottingVillain666 · 2022-02-07T09:55:13+00:00

But even without casual flings, i would be happy single anyway. Sex is not my priority nor finding someone. My soon to be husband was the dude who made a crate fell on my feet. How we clicked? His mother told him to get me something as a way to say sorry as my bf is a anxious mess. So we began talking and it happened.

None0fYour8usiness · 2022-02-07T10:33:56+00:00

Bad? Not necessarily.

But I do want a LTR that eventually leads to family.

Profession_Mobile · 2022-02-07T12:34:30+00:00

At the moment (40f) I don’t see anything bad about being single. I really enjoy just doing my own thing when I want to. When I’m older though it would be nice to have some company but only if the feelings are mutual and the relationship is meant to be.

D00d00f4c3 · 2022-02-07T13:13:50+00:00

Not really. Doesn’t really cross my mind when I’m talking to men or women in pretty much any location. Bottom line: I’m usually chatting people up to be friends and don’t give a fuck of their relationship status. Though women in particular must think I’m flirting a lot since they often bring their boyfriend/husband/etc up within the first 15 min of meeting them. At least, my lady friend tells me that’s what it means,.

Edit: outcome is such a final word. If they’re like 70 something i don’t look at it as an outcome even. Seems like a lot of older people do remarry. Look at older people. They seem to be doing just fine getting ladies/dudes (id say “theys “ but Never met a “they” older than like early 30s 😂 A young single person just seems normal. Fuck all ages of single seem normal. Not like a failure, just where someone currently resides in life.

SaltyFatNuts · 2022-02-07T14:04:00+00:00

Bad thing? No for everyone? Also no I don’t judge if you want to be single for life but I’d rather die than live alone tbh

No_Regular1586 · 2022-02-07T15:16:33+00:00

If it's not a choice, then yes.

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2022-02-07T16:23:07+00:00

No negative association with the single life. I love my partner but were I to end up single again I would be fine with that too.

sarkington · 2022-02-07T16:47:02+00:00

I would hope I’d be ok with it, but you never know. No guarantees in life

-passepar2t- · 2022-02-07T17:00:06+00:00

No, it's pretty much what I do and I don't see it as a bad outcome.

Other people may consider me a loser but that's life.

S3542U · 2022-02-07T17:16:24+00:00

Nope. You do you.

Live and let live.

Cheers!

StacksFifthAve · 2022-02-07T17:18:05+00:00

Single is a default, so without context it is not good or bad.

I’d say a man who is perpetually single despite his attempts not to be would put being single in a negative light. Pre-selection notwithstanding, there’s something about him that repels women from desiring intimacy with him.

On the other hand, I would also say the Jennifer Lopez types puts not being single in a negative light. I just use her in this regard because we all probably know everyday women like this, but we all know who Jennifer Lopez is so it’s easier to get the point across; I’m talking about that woman who always needs to be seen with a man, is never happy to let their peers think they’re alone. This isn’t really what the question asked for but it’s in these situations that I would tell the woman she needs to spend some time alone because there seems to be some issues with being happy by oneself. I would suggest that her maximum contact with men be casual sex for the time being, but that she’d probably just be better off stocking up on her toys while she finds herself.

I somewhat find these perpetually single men and never alone women to be similar.

2022-02-07T17:59:00+00:00

not bad outcome, but I would prefer not to be single. rn its fine, im just chilling. but i dont want to be single in my 30s-40s.

chalkandapples · 2022-02-07T18:49:11+00:00

I loved being single in my early 20's. I never had a desire for casual flings either. I liked solitude more than dating. It was a nice time in my life that I'm really fond of and have great memories of. But I didn't want my life to stagnate, so I started dating my mid 20's.

Title	Would you associate being single as a bad thing? Why or why not?
Author	thoughtfulsoul10000
Upvotes	22
Comments	98
Date	February 7, 2022 2:21 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/smenis/would_you_associate_being_single_as_a_bad_thing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/would-you-associate-being-single-as-a-bad-thing.1100640 https://theredarchive.com/post/1100640

Comments