'Narcissist' the most over used word of 2023/2024

alifeofpeace · 2024-12-06T00:25:22+00:00

People with cluster B personality disorders are more likely to end up in divorce. And they are also far more likely to end up in high conflict divorce. Hence, cluster Bs tend to me overrepresented in high conflict divorces.

blackmelancholydog · 2024-12-05T22:32:10+00:00

I think the pandemic/last couple years messed a lot of people up and internally they live curled up with barbs out like porcupines at this point.

blackmelancholydog · 2024-12-05T22:30:51+00:00

Between 1 in 200 and 1 in 20 people meet the criteria (psychologically), so if someone has had less than 20 romantic partners and describes more than 1 as a a narcissist...

Boolit_Tooth_Tony · 2024-12-05T19:45:01+00:00

Anything they can use to avoid accountability, they will use.

drtij_dzienz · 2024-12-05T16:23:45+00:00

Basically, for every man saying their ex “has BPD” there is a woman saying their ex “is a narcissist”.

Pro-IDGAF · 2024-12-05T13:49:21+00:00

i agree and in fact, during my thankfully brief window of being single after D, the women i met where always rattling on about their narcissistic ex husband and then would turn the conversation to themselves and what they want out of life, everything would be centered around them. who’s the narcissist?

BatGuano52 · 2024-12-05T13:28:07+00:00

I saw a good meme on TV the other day:

"There is no "I" in "team" but there are three in "narcissistic"."

MindfulKid · 2024-12-05T13:18:05+00:00

Psychologist here… the problem is that people doesn’t know what they are talking about. They don’t care to really know, the only thing they want is a a word that helps them “validate” whatever point of view they have; they don’t seek to understand, they want to be right.

The other point is that social media has F’ed things up. Yesterday I was discussing with my students how social networks has turned self-diagnosis a problem. Same has happened with ADHD, autism, multiple personality disorder. It seems that people is prone and desperate to find something to define others and themselves, whether is destructive or not.

Sea_Emu_4259 · 2024-12-05T11:27:54+00:00

I heard more often gaslighting.
the general weak trend is that anything unpleasant is called violence
used to be physicals viokence, now in DV, now they aded up phycological violence, economical violence (no joke)
Soon we will have:

Culinary violence (you asked he to cook homemade meal instead of junk food)
Digital violence: you asked her/kids to reduced their screen time
Kinesthetic violence: Forcing kid to walk to school instead of using your car or reducing the Temperature of the house bc gas price is too high for you in Winter.
Travel violence: You did not let them go to that Paris trip. Being broke is no valid reason !

Joke aside, How about some specific female violence? I will call it Marital Prostitution: she asks something in exchange for sex. Sounds similar to the opposite: marital rape.

LashkarNaraanji123 · 2024-12-05T09:51:20+00:00

"Narcissist" is often used when "Selfish butthead", "Solipsistic", and "Stuck in 3rd Kohlberg Stage" are more appropriate.

PeerSifter · 2024-12-05T08:42:27+00:00

Narcissist is clearly the World Heavyweight Champion.

Other competitors:
- gaslighting (it now simply means 'disagreeable')
- pedophile (a man who shows interest in any woman under the age of 25)
- incel (despite the "celibate" origin, it's now a generic insult hurled at any man, even a married man with children actively having penis-in-vagina sex literally at this very moment)
- abuse (anything she didn't agree with)
- financial abuse (you put reasonable and practical limits on household spending)
- emotional abuse (you hurt her feelings)
- emotional labor (a fancy way to say 'thinking')
- consent (you raped her, no matter what)

I'm sure I can think of a few more...

Pluto1911 · 2024-12-05T06:44:07+00:00

Women can be/are some of the biggest narcissists. Just look at social media

Brave_Quantity_5261 · 2024-12-05T05:15:26+00:00

Very few people are actually diagnosable narcissists, but people can have narcissistic tendencies. I’ve heard it argued that many people have some degree of narcissistic traits, yet fall short of diagnosis.

Also important to remember and remind people that only a mental health professional can diagnose someone as a narcissist, and they will only do so in a proper doctor-patient situation (i.e. my ex wife can’t tell her psychologist all about me then I get diagnosed a narcissist)

ashtag916 · 2024-12-05T04:30:37+00:00

I hate that word more than shit. We all know people who are like this… let’s call them selfish psycho pricks who think it’s fun to torment those they love with a smile on their face ? Thought you married one? My mom was classic! But also you have that alcoholic crazy thing that comes out and let’s just call them sociopaths instead. Losers. That’s what they really are. Joy suckers.

But yes not every one is a narcissist Karen. Maybe bill got sick of Mary posting on tik tok instead of getting rowdy in bed. Maybe he got grossed out when she gained 120 pounds and told him everything he did was wrong. Got drunk and embarrassed him in front of friends and family while maxing out the credit cards at target on a bunch of plastic bs. Maybe he just wanted to find the remote but it was under 20 loads of laundry. But yeah he was a narcissist.

aj357222 · 2024-12-05T04:22:04+00:00

TikTok is fkn wild place, man.

aquatone61 · 2024-12-05T04:05:04+00:00

That word has been around for a long time. People are waking up to behaviors that are narcissistic and realizing it is a lot more common. Would my EX be considered a full blown narcissist? Probably not but she definitely has tendencies towards it. I think most people do but they control the urges and deal with it.

dnbndnb · 2024-12-05T03:37:06+00:00

I grew up with a full blown NPD mother. Didn’t figure it out until my 50’s. I believe I’ve met four true NPD personalities in my 60+ years on this planet, two male & two female.

Like everything else this has become pop psychology, easy answer blame shifting. Every person has some narcissism in them. However by clinical definition, not may people fit the true psychological definition of a narcissist.

bkdad75 · 2024-12-05T03:27:17+00:00

You're behind the times my friend, all our exes have "avoidant attachment styles" this year. You're right, it's nonsense 🤣

Byass007 · 2024-12-05T01:55:01+00:00

They are all crazy

InternationalBag7290 · 2024-12-05T01:43:16+00:00

I’ll probably be downvoted, but, this is a “Trump” thing. Prior to him becoming president, I didn’t have any idea what a narcissist was. After he became president, the term was all over media. I think my ex wife might be one.

Anyway, it’s a spectrum. Everybody has some narcissistic tendencies.

Ancient-Homework7557 · 2024-12-05T01:11:40+00:00

That’s something a narcissist would say. 😆

St_petebiodiesel · 2024-12-05T00:57:40+00:00

It's just a word people use to blame other people's personalities that they don't like. People have been on this earth for millions of years. What did they call narcissists back before the word even existed?

You can't put someone in a box.

Positive_Rub_6696 · 2024-12-05T00:24:15+00:00

Quick Google listing traits, self-importance, for example, were probably recognized in early courtship as desirable masculine qualities.

UnimportantOutcome67 · 2024-12-05T00:24:11+00:00

I don't disagree, but my STBX never apologizes to the kids or I and is only focused on 'MY LIFE!!'. If she isn't a narcissist, she's pretty goddamn close.

Acceptable_Piano4809 · 2024-12-05T00:10:23+00:00

Why did my wife leave me? Of course, Im a narcissist.

WeathermanOnTheTown · 2024-12-05T00:05:16+00:00

The thing is this: a lot of people really do have narcissist exes (me included), because narcissists tend to ruin relationships. So I try to believe people at first when they say "my ex is a narc". It's absolutely true for me.

And you must be young, because the word narcissist has been around ever since Narcissus. Christopher Lasch wrote a bestseller in 1979 about America called The Culture of Narcissism.

Corvettelov · 2024-12-04T23:53:13+00:00

I know! The dating sites every single reject is a narcissist. No they’re not!

Tchalang0 · 2024-12-04T22:11:30+00:00

I think one very very close to narcissist is 'abuse'.

He dont want to buy ne a new car > he abuse me financialy

He dont want I sleep with my best friend > he abuse me emotionaly

GaeasSon · 2024-12-04T22:09:00+00:00

Opinion:
Relax... People say things to try to cope. Technically "Narcissist" is a self-obsessed person. "Narcissist" is also what a narcissist calls someone else who is finally learning to defend their self or to set personal boundaries. Sometimes it's a combination of the two.
It's just a noise people make to make themselves feel better. Don't let it erode your calm

dober88 · 2024-12-04T22:08:51+00:00

It's a tool magnified by social media to avoid accountability and consequence.

Steer clear of anyone who throws that accusation around like candy.

Puzzleheaded_War922 · 2024-12-04T21:42:59+00:00

The DSM defines it. And it's a legit ICD-10 diagnosis (F60.81).

Being bitten by a shark for the second time is also a legit ICD-10 diagnosis (W56.41XD). Just throwing that out there. I'd love to know if it's ever been used.

Therapy has really devolved into a weapon. Therapists are referees who just want the hour to end for God's sake. And everyone who attended a session of therapy gets a decoder ring and honorary PhD in Name Calling.

Disastrous_Age_1493 · 2024-12-04T21:37:08+00:00

That and gaslighting…he’s a narcissistic asshole and he’s gaslighting me. Wtf does that even mean?

THX1138-22 · 2024-12-04T21:33:47+00:00

Rates of narcissistic tendencies are slowly increasing, likely due to social media. Still, it is overused. We all need to have some narcissism to survive, but it becomes pathological in only a small percent. Many people who use the term loosely are also likely projecting—they are the narcissist and imagine the trait in others because they are uncomfortable acknowledging that they are the problem.

leaving4me · 2024-12-04T21:11:57+00:00

I agree. You can spell asshole without the extra letters.

Gullible_Rich_7156 · 2024-12-04T21:10:49+00:00

I’m sure it probably is overused, but for any woman who was ACTUALLY married to a Narcissist, I feel badly for them because my ex is textbook. Narcissism is also a spectrum…all of us are narcissists to SOME degree. In any event, being married to my ex was pure hell and being divorced from her isn’t much better. This is the Narcissist’s Creed-it describes my ex’s entire approach to interacting with other people:

That didn’t happen.

And if it did, it wasn’t that bad.

And if it was, that’s not a big deal.

And if it is, that’s not my fault.

And if it was, I didn’t mean it.

And if I did, you deserved it.

Now my focus is making sure that my daughters don’t grow up to be just like her due to the trauma they continue to suffer at her hands.

deuceice · 2024-12-04T21:04:46+00:00

Well, a bunch of them tend to have those tendencies as well. Perhaps "less than 1%" of the word are true clinical narcs, but our culture has bled the tendencies into our culture. I'd honestly believe more women have the tendencies due to what culture pushes. "My Princess" "nobody is happy if Momma is not happy" "Happy wife Happy Life" "PMS" I mean, they have a license for bad, self-prioritizaion behavior... the hallmark of narcissim.

qmoorman · 2024-12-04T20:56:49+00:00

Ironically that's exactly what those women wanted on the front end. Then they started seeing his "edginess" as what it really is: abuse.

Title	'Narcissist' the most over used word of 2023/2024
Author	TheBritishWay1985
Upvotes	78
Comments	66
Date	December 4, 2024 8:54 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1h6qw2x/narcissist_the_most_over_used_word_of_20232024/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/narcissist-the-most-over-used-word-of-20232024.1537616 https://theredarchive.com/post/1537616

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