Why do men stare?

BlessdRTheFreaks · 2025-05-11T21:16:37+00:00

Why do people look at beautiful paintings

Grow_peace_in_Bedlam · 2025-05-11T21:43:14+00:00

That doesn't sound like a well-adjusted man. I'm a bit autistic, and even I know that that's not normal behavior.

I channel my staring instincts to checking out my wife's ass when she wears a tight midi skirt.

-DidYou · 2025-05-11T21:21:31+00:00

I can't say, he could've been zoning out, he could've been a creep, or maybe it really was that burger. I don't think I have ever consciously stared at a person for 20 minutes, or have really seen anyone else do that, so no idea.

KayRay1994 · 2025-05-11T20:51:12+00:00

If you’re offering a burger i will happily take your burger

BobtheArcher2018 · 2025-05-12T04:13:03+00:00

Staring at various things, including people, is natural for humans. So is not liking being stared at, thus we socialize people not to do so.

The instinct to stare is probably stronger in men as the primary 'hunters' (though, yes, women did hunt). And men are harder to socialize than women in general, but need it more. If external socialization is not working well in a place, the negative impact on men is more pronounced. Women socialize themselves and each other more naturally. Plus, male variation theory cuts both ways. More rocket scientists. More Jack the Rippers. Males are natures experiments, and many experiments fail.

Then, if we are talking about staring at the opposite sex, male desire is more purely visually driven than female on top of all the stuff above. Men shouldn't stare at women, but it is always gonna happen more than the other way around. How much it happens depends on how strong/effective the cultural policing and overall socialization. Men won't stare at women much if they know her brothers and uncles might be around the corner and will come beat the fuck out of him. But not sure you want that setup.

LAKings55 · 2025-05-11T22:49:20+00:00

Creep without any awareness of social cues or norms.

SherbertDense1415 · 2025-05-11T23:02:06+00:00

Its usually an overreactive response. The otherside of the spectrum is being a passive bitch, being afraid of women, afraid to look in their direction, like when we are in second grade playing cooties.

Staring like a freak is a way to take back the power, feel less impotent for these men.

abaxeron · 2025-05-12T01:40:08+00:00

An eyeball is just a clump of cells.

JohnaldJr21 · 2025-05-11T20:52:37+00:00

Sometimes I just zone out and might accidentally stare at someone not realizing it

Kreeps_United · 2025-05-11T21:43:36+00:00

Weird that you posted this because I've had women do this to me all the time.

MrNotSoFunFact · 2025-05-12T01:23:58+00:00

I'm talking about parking/sitting next to people and staring for 20 minutes with eye contact.

Yea this for sure happens to you a "Couple times a month"

Women will gas each other up about the dumbest, most obvious bait

Edit: SOME women, I was proven wrong. my mistake

RayAP19 · 2025-05-11T21:06:50+00:00

How often does this happen to you?

Impressive-Baby5068 · 2025-05-12T20:00:34+00:00

I don’t. I look at a woman if I notice she has a nice ass or something, maybe for 2 or 3 seconds, then I never look at her again.

The men who stare are socially retarded, or fishing for eye contact way longer than they should.

Puzzleheaded_ghost · 2025-05-20T15:34:38+00:00

I scanned through some replies, and I'm shocked

This is an EXTREMELY high-risk situation. Yes EXTREMELY.

I've been in fist fights and worked with individuals already challenging me—this is part of a pattern. If you are not required to maintain respect, this is a signal to de-escalate and increase the safety of your interactive position. Have you not heard of contests of will where the loser blinks? Trust your instincts, for God's sake.

If it's the same person, it's even higher risk. Yes, people stare, but you are still correct to ask. Everyone here missed the boat. Safe in the wilderness with a bear—shit like that. Saying anything else is potentially murder.

If it's a predator animal, DO NOT RUN unless you want to excite them to chase. Don't do it. I didn't. Do not stare down, but make them aware you see them. Look away, but maintain enough contact to make them aware that you see them. Make yourself look bigger. Do not turn your back. If attacked, fight back. Bears avoid loud noises. If there's a cub, you are in a very bad situation. Dont be stupid.

If it's a human, sociopaths use an "interview" to assess. Look away, but break eye contact strategically.
Trust your gut - the book by Gavin de Becker is a good read

Trust Your Gut (Gavin de Becker's PINS): Recognize the manipulation tactics (forced teaming, charm, too many details, discounting "no"). Your unease is a critical signal.
Do NOT engage in their script: Don't answer intrusive questions, explain yourself, or try to be polite if they are violating boundaries.
Assert Boundaries (if safe): A clear, firm "No," "I'm not interested," or "Please leave me alone." Then disengage.
Create Distance and escape: This is paramount. If possible, remove yourself from the interaction and the environment. Move towards safety (other people, well-lit areas, secure locations).
Do NOT reveal personal information.
Do NOT worry about being "rude." Your safety is more important.

The interview before the assault:

This isn't a formal sit-down interview. It's a process where a predator:

Selects a potential target: Often based on perceived vulnerability (distracted, alone, looks lost, appears submissive).
Tests the target:
- Non-verbal: Prolonged stares, encroaching on personal space.
- Verbal: Using PINS (Forced Teaming: "We need to figure this out"), charm, intrusive questions, discounting "no."
Gauges reaction:
- Do they ignore their intuition?
- Are they overly polite or compliant?
- Do they give away information?
- Do they seem easily intimidated?
- Do they fail to assert boundaries?

If you hate ChatGPT answers, I would counter - why the hell has no one said this!!!!!!!!

maplehobo · 2025-05-11T21:15:34+00:00

He was a creep.

Is this a regular occurrence for you? You might be hot and be giving introvert vibes to the point only creep and/or awkward guys are trying to approach you.

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Acrobatic-Writer7734 · 2025-05-12T09:15:52+00:00

I mean I'm not going to pain all women with the actions of one if she sat in the car and stated at me...

Some people are psychos lol. That's all there is to it. I don't think this is a man/woman thing.

midnight_blue77 · 2025-05-14T02:18:13+00:00

It's an instinctive and compulsive reflex.

But doing it for 20 minutes is definitely not normal. Even for 20 seconds is not normal. Zoning out while looking at a girl is a thing, kinda like ASMR. Sometimes I do it with my gf when she's combing her hair or when she's scribbling and typing on her laptop. There's something strangely soothing and calming watching women doing normal things that put me in a very chill mood. But of course, I don't stare! I just glance and notice what they're doing and then I just mellow out while listening to them in the background.

Parrotsandarmadillos · 2025-05-11T23:05:49+00:00

We have eyes??

No-Rough-7390 · 2025-05-12T01:01:53+00:00

Men’s brains make them look at everything as an object for tool use. Find a great enough site, game over.

Title	Why do men stare?
Author	-DidYou
Upvotes	0
Comments	137
Date	May 11, 2025 8:49 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1kkb05x/why_do_men_stare/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-do-men-stare.1551928 https://theredarchive.com/post/1551928

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