Most women choose among men that approach them first. By choosing strictly from men who approach, women are not selecting from the entire pool of available men. The pool of men who approach have a disproportionate number of men who seek sex as a priority. This is because sex can be a powerful motivating factor for some men and they often only need to use their eyes to see if the woman qualifies.

Meanwhile men who value connection aren't as motivated to approach women because they don't even know if they would connect with a woman based on appearance alone. This isn't to say that men who seek connection will never approach, just that it will be less frequent.

If women would instead approach men, they would be selecting from the larger pool of men that include many men that don't prioritize sex. The women I know who did the approaching are all now engaged or married. I realize that is a small sample, but I think this theory would apply on a widespread level.

Curious on what the community thinks of this theory. Note, I am not saying that this method is ideal for all women. I am just saying it could be useful for women who want men that don't prioritize sex. For women that prioritize sex, they should continue choosing among the men that approach them.