What's wrong with the trend of men who earn equal or perhaps less money than their wives?

reluctantly_red · 2020-01-11T18:55:32+00:00

Now that women are not dependent on men like they were before, a lot of men are not achieving as highly as they were before, why, well they don't need to any more, they no longer need to serve that gender role.

However the whole concept of dating down seems to bother women more than it bothers men.

I don't see there being a way out of this, just one of them things. If the women at the top struggle like these articles imply (Ive seen plenty of them), well shit happens, they got their money and career like they wanted, can't have it all I suppose.

CMOAN_MAYNE · 2020-01-11T22:21:40+00:00

It is hilarious, this meme where women simultaneously complain about the wage gap yet overwhelmingly select only for men who earn more than them.

Salty-Bastard · 2020-01-11T18:52:58+00:00

Same way it was a problem for years that men earned more than women. I would give the same advice to men, educate yourself and earn your own money so you don’t have to rely on women when everything goes to shit.

Mr_Smoogs · 2020-01-11T19:01:14+00:00

I think women are particularly averse to a lower standard of living than what they are used to.

I have a friend who left a guaranteed comfortable life with his parents business to move to Alaska. He lived in a dry cabin for a bit while he was obtaining a degree and certs for his career in oil. I think this is a unique case to the extreme, but the point being that not many women are willing to accept a lower standard of living than what they are used to.

I don’t think many women have a big problem going from being dependent on their family to being dependent on their husband (or government). However, many men want to make their own and that often means accepting a lower standard of living than how they were raised, whether that is through military service or whatever. Men also know that it is really unlikely that a woman is going to pick up the slack, while women certainly have it in the back of their minds that a well-off bachelor is theoretically possible.

BertTheWelder · 2020-01-11T19:06:47+00:00

Women want to earn the same as men. They also want men to earn more than them.

Very common that women want two mutually exclusive things at the same time.

Barneysparky · 2020-01-11T19:26:25+00:00

When have CEOs ever married their maids or secretaries?

Educated people want to be with educated people. People marry within their own class.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2020-01-11T20:44:35+00:00

Its ostensibly a problem because of the female hypergamic tendency

PennnyLame · 2020-01-11T18:55:39+00:00

Nothing?

All it means is these successful women should shoot for janitors and Cabana dudes within their own companies, much like a CEO his maid or secretary.

CEO’s don’t date/marry maids. The women I know who out-earn their partners are with men who have careers in nonprofit/academia/artistic realms. This is similar to rich men who marry dancers or women in philanthropy.

But, yeah, not a huge issue, if neither party makes it one.

XtoDoubt · 2020-01-11T18:52:59+00:00

Women are hypergamous, unlike men. If you don't know what that means, it means women date across and up, men will date across, up, and down. You do the math.

2020-01-11T20:32:02+00:00

I earn less than my wife - always have. Lots of my male friends earn less than their partners/wives. I don’t think it’s the problem you’re making it out to be.

And what’s with the CEO-janitor thing? Can’t it be CEO wife-middle manager husband? It’s so crazy it just might work!

Blue_Andre · 2020-01-11T21:00:04+00:00

It’s unnatural. Three words: Hypergamy, wife, motherhood. She’s hypergamous so she will want a man who is stable and earns more than her, if she works. Also, if he’s providing anyway, she should be a wife - ie do what a wife does and not just call herself a wife. Women are naturally mothers so that doesn’t go together with working a career. Career women are unnatural and it’s no wonder why they’re depressed and stressed, especially in the long run and when they get older and are childless and/or unmarried.

smokecheck1976 · 2020-01-12T10:13:26+00:00

The wage gap isn't gone. It's inverted depending on where you look. The problem, for women, is that they do not usually date down in terms of perceived job prestige or pay. They are slightly more likely to date when they perceive even, but they really want to date "up" in terms of income and prestige. So, in essence, in pursuing high education, prestigious careers, and being career and goal oriented, they became their own ideal mate. There aren't that many $100K+ jobs out there so there aren't that many men earning that much. The people conducting all the social engineering of the last five decades have not once, ever, taken into account what the individual wants and were more than willing to tell whatever lies were necessary to forward their desired goals.

You don't see the average little girl wanting to be a "career-driven, high earning woman". You don't usually see little boys playing tea party when they could be playing Cowboys and Indians, or whatever your generation and culture happens to call it.

Million-Suns · 2020-01-11T18:46:18+00:00

Women still judge their own status by that of their husbands and boyfriends. If their husbands and boyfriends are beneath them, then that means their status is lowered too.

Also women look down on anything traditionally feminine, and being traditionally feminine means being less than.

Letting women be educated and equal was probably a mistake because women want to desperately cling to every feminine advantage they have, but maybe future generations won't care either way.

Darkseeker_Mau · 2020-01-11T19:02:37+00:00

Some women see men as "economic classes", and those same women refuse to marry what they consider to be "lower class men".

Women also value themselves based on the kind of men they attract, so you can see that that kind of outlook on life can become disastrous, like the fearmongers in those articles.

reluctantly_red · 2020-01-11T20:28:39+00:00

The female CEO may bang an attractive subordinate but she's not about to marry him.

LeJacquelope · 2020-01-11T21:06:30+00:00

[deleted]

WIA20XX · 2020-01-11T19:59:26+00:00

There are plenty of low value men living off breadwinner wives right now.

"I'm gonna be the next Post Malone baby!".

Women love it!

rus9384 · 2020-01-11T20:51:47+00:00

I mean, these women just don't find another use for men than earning money and very rarely being semen providers that almost all men can be anyway.

So, they prefer to be single than with men that only are like anchors to them.

Willow-girl · 2020-01-11T20:25:24+00:00

The problem lies in the fact that a lower-earning wife is probably contributing in other ways, like domestic tasks and childcare. But men aren't really wired up to do those things, so the question then becomes, if he isn't working (or working very much) what IS he doing? If the answer in "lounging around the house, waiting for his wife to come home from work and fix dinner," well, that relationship probably isn't going to last very long. Women generally won't tolerate men who don't pull their weight in SOME way.

poppy_blu · 2020-01-11T19:42:03+00:00

Doom and gloom sells

eternitypasses · 2020-01-11T19:25:09+00:00

In my opinion as a woman, I still want a man that makes more than me me, why? Cause at the end of the day, simply due to biology, I have the responsibility if carrying a baby for 9 months and then giving birth to it and will have more responsibility raising it than my partner. Therefore, I still expect the man to have greater responsibility when it comes to making money.

Orange_Paisley · 2020-01-11T19:07:27+00:00

I make more than Mr. Paisley so no problem here. What he lacks in money he makes up for in charm, charisma and heart.

2020-01-11T18:48:07+00:00

It's not

CHAD_TDK · 2020-01-11T22:33:32+00:00

Wrong lies in the eye of the beholder. Statistical data shows that there are more women entering and graduating from college than there are men; and that leads to a lot more women making more money than men.

That is a fact. Forget on the why, since that's another ball of wax; but it's the trend and it's increasing along the same lines.

Now, is it wrong? There's no right or wrong in reality, is it? It is what it is.

You don't like that your SO makes more money than you? Find someone who makes less and it's ok with you making more.

You don't like that your SO makes less money than you? Find someone who makes more and it's ok with you making less.

I don't see anything wrong.

CentralAdmin · 2020-01-11T23:20:28+00:00

Isn't the fact the wage gap alone is essentially closed or near that point a good thing

Just a point on this, the wage gap doesn't take into account personal choices. It implies women are earning less for the same work, thanks to feminist obfuscation and distraction. However, a teacher is not going to earn as much as an engineer. An arts degree is not going to earn as much as a business degree. Women tend towards the humanities which earns less than business or science.

As to the rest, women are pricing themselves out of the market. They wanted to have their cake and eat it too, but are finding it rather difficult. Men are mostly okay with dating up, barring the more traditionally masculine men who may find it threatening. But millennials are not like the older generation. I read an article saying that 43% of dads in the 80s had never changed a diaper, but today that's down to 3%. They're spending more time with their kids and some want to be stay at home parents.

Women need to decide what they are willing to give up to have what they want. They cannot have it all because no one gets it all. They wanted to cut out the middle man to get access to money and status, which is great. But they either do not understand what men find attractive (and claim it's sexist) or they simply aim too high and would rather be alone than not have Chad. This is an issue they need to figure out.

TheMarbleSlab · 2020-01-12T16:27:33+00:00

I make around $80k a year. Rent is $4500 a month in my area for a house.

Do you think that I can afford this on my own? Nope.

Do you think that if I married someone making $80k a year, totaling us to $160k a year, we could afford rent together? Well....we would be able to afford it, but it would be a strain.

Now imagine I married someone making $150k a year. We would be fine. Not only that, if I needed to take time off to take care of our children, I could do it without risking homelessness.

So there we are.

majani · 2020-01-12T21:08:13+00:00

It's a big problem because the majority of men have ingrained provider instincts. But something tells me that if men were willing to be the hot and popular house husband to a career woman, it could still work. A lot of these career women run around with hot guys on the low

mistresswhat · 2020-01-11T21:28:54+00:00

All the handwringing about how women won't date men who earn less than them is completely overblown.

First off, a lot of men feel insecure about that situation and make it into an issue despite the fact that their female partners don't actually care.

Second, they still expect to be treated like a provider without doing any providing. A woman who has her lifestyle subsidized by a man will understandably take on more household tasks. A woman who pays most of the rent won't be happy when she comes home to a messy house and is expected to make dinner. If you're not bringing money to the table you need to improve her life in some way, and a lot of guys just... don't. Like beyond household stuff, they're bad in bed and bad at conversation and they don't provide much emotional support.

Legit half this sub is dudes mad it's no longer quite as easy to financially manipulate desperate women into putting up with their shit.

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DXBrigade · 2020-01-11T19:45:34+00:00

Whiners are gonna whine.

yoshimango97 · 2020-01-11T19:49:25+00:00

It’s because the wage gap that people refer to isn’t actually closed overall. It’s just closing in marriages.

From my experience it takes a special kind of man and woman to make a relationship with female breadwinners to work as well. Most people consciously or subconsciously know they’re not the type so this trend will be upsetting to them.

welcometothejl · 2020-01-11T20:31:26+00:00

I don't see anything wrong. I also would add that if those people get divorced I don't think the woman should have to pay child support or alimony, just like I don't think man should. This is assuming they are willing to share custody equally. It's 2020 and there is enough opportunity for each of us to make our own way through life.

beyond98 · 2020-01-11T21:36:03+00:00

No problem with that. The thing is to be wealthy enough whether wife or husband earn more

lilsaihah · 2020-01-11T22:03:36+00:00

I don't think anyone has a philosophical objection to women earning more money than men on an individual basis.

I think the problem is something of a sidestep; we should be looking more closely at education level rather than earnings level. The college application and completion rates for men and women are very skewed in women's favor; I think it's a 3:2 ratio.

I'm not convinced it's even that drastic of a problem anyway. It only affects women of the same class as the authors of the articles: women who study dog linguistics at college and aren't especially good prospects anyway.

Certain-Newt · 2020-01-12T00:18:25+00:00

There are lots of women in high earning positions, CEO's ,.Directors, Professionals etc, and quite rightly so. Personally my partner & I have lots of females in our social circle, but one who works full time as an employee (probably on min wage) , and one who has her own business. The vast majority work part time or not all all. At least they have the freedom of choice, but they choose not

Million-Suns · 2020-01-12T01:07:25+00:00

What's wrong with the trend of men who earn equal or perhaps less money than their wives?

It goes against the fantasy romantic novels instill in women's head. Whether it's Cendrillon or Ariel the siren, or the woman in 50 shades of grey, it's always the man who earns more.

Exception was Aladdin.

2020-01-12T01:25:26+00:00

(reading this thread)

Damn I should work harder and vet men better.

Kwint86 · 2020-01-12T02:06:03+00:00

Its just hard to do because I don't feel good spending someone else's money for the toys I want.

Feels like there are strings attached.

87AudreyHorne · 2020-01-12T10:16:33+00:00

Nothing is wrong with that. Most women I know dont care how much a guy makes at all

Jathrowaway97 · 2020-01-12T16:35:52+00:00

There’s a sizeable chunk of people that can’t handle that dynamic so of course they’ll be weary if that’s the direction things are going,

Something_Chronical · 2020-01-12T19:19:27+00:00

There's all that whining about finding a man that makes more money becoming difficult, then there's this shit...and all the male feminists hop all over this...smh

https://time.com/5690596/melinda-gates-empowering-women/

CatchPhraze · 2020-01-12T22:56:07+00:00

My take is that women are now duel roll filling. If they both do more unpaid labor and paid labor then he offers her far less the the reverse.

Men are pretty shit but getting better at closing their gap (housework and childcare). It just makes sense not to want a partner inferior in both ways.

Dora_Bowl · 2020-01-11T19:03:36+00:00

Nothing is wrong about it, but people have worries about it and those worries are often irrational.

k995 · 2020-01-11T22:56:59+00:00

Nothing Is wrong with that. As if the only way for a woman to.make more is to be with someone who.makes minimum wage. Plenty make.more who cares?

Are you really that insecure you need that for your fragile ego?

Title	What's wrong with the trend of men who earn equal or perhaps less money than their wives?
Author	IcyHotRoad
Upvotes	22
Comments	208
Date	January 11, 2020 6:42 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/enbaam/whats_wrong_with_the_trend_of_men_who_earn_equal/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/whats-wrong-with-the-trend-of-men-who-earn-equal.305450 https://theredarchive.com/post/305450

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