The bar is on the ground

_bethiebabes · 2021-05-11T14:55:57+00:00

I see these posts all the time and comments are always so positive, and I just don’t get it. how can you read these posts and not immediately think “wtf is wrong with men that this behavior is so rare it has to be celebrated?” how is this not a slap in the face to everyone who reads it that the world is a seriously fucked up place? how could anyone find this encouraging, rather than a horrific indictment of life as a woman?

AcadiaLeather5071 · 2021-05-11T15:03:17+00:00

All men benefit from violence against women. The bar is so low that all you have to do is not be a rapist. Women are literally so grateful just to not be raped that they’ll put these men on a pedestal. And often these men are toxic in different ways, but she stays because “it could be worse.”

-pop-fizz-clink · 2021-05-11T14:52:19+00:00

So, she's glad he didn't rape her? Has she considered maybe he's the reason for these BV and yeast infections?

Mcccy · 2021-05-11T14:49:28+00:00

The bar is on hell. Most likely on 2nd circle.

Suspicious-Leg-1407 · 2021-05-11T15:09:48+00:00

Rape is felony, even in a committed relationship.

A FELONY.

spinsterchachkies · 2021-05-11T14:49:34+00:00

My boyfriend doesn’t rape me! Yay

bleda_princezna · 2021-05-11T14:58:39+00:00

It's really sad to be all gushy when a partner treats a woman like a human being.

And I recently realized I'm still guilty of this myself. I was so over the moon my bf is willing to do chores, cook or that he'll drive me if I need to go somewhere. Meanwhile I completely overlooked (or should I say forced myself to) the fact he's cold, not very attentive, incredibly shit at communicating about problems, doesn't really court me and is very selfish in bed.

So in the end I found someone who doesn't treat me like absolute shit as some of my previous partners did. That's nothing to be over the moon about. But I was, at first. Prior FDS, prior getting some of my confidence back.

Now I'm just disappointed with him. And myself especially, because I got myself into this mess despite the fact I was single for a long time before I started dating again (to prevent myself from getting into a shitty relationship). But at least I found myself and know what I want.

I found FDS by "accident" and I'm so grateful it happened. It opened my eyes and gave me motivation to work on myself.

ASeaOfQuotes · 2021-05-11T14:51:19+00:00

AKA Ladies, get yourself a man who does the bare minimum! 😩💦👌

millennialpink2000 · 2021-05-11T14:52:00+00:00

"I'm so grateful my boyfriend didn't rape me" isn't the relationship flex you think it is

basicbagels · 2021-05-11T16:26:52+00:00

Cringing at the use of the phrase “sexy times” in both posts

donttextme_k · 2021-05-11T15:21:35+00:00

Hello?? Do they not have friends?? Do they not know these are basic human decency

freelancepsychic · 2021-05-11T15:54:37+00:00

As I sit here sipping my coffee, realizing that many of my ex boyfriends raped me by initiating sex while I was still asleep or half asleep

ThrowRA020470 · 2021-05-11T15:05:27+00:00

This is the bare minimum.

The worst part is that she probably has been abused several times before entering this relationship. That’s why she’s so happy about it. She no longer recognizes what should be expected from a boyfriend/husband. Being treated like a human being is news to her.

orangeboobert · 2021-05-11T15:45:15+00:00

Ohhhh god this reminds of this trashy show on bravo called summer house. One of the stars, Lindsey, said to her obvs lvm “I won’t be mad if you finger me while I’m sleeping.” 🤢wtf why did this actually air? Non-consent isn’t sexy. And consent isn’t sexy, either... it’s to be expected. Like you know, wiping your butt or brushing your teeth.

ConstantNurse · 2021-05-11T16:13:41+00:00

I think what makes me the most depressed is even puppies understand the “Ouch, you’ve hurt me!” behavior and will stop what they are doing because they don’t want to hurt you.

It’s expected they should not want to hurt you. It’s expected that they should help when you are hurting. You know what’s above and beyond? Doing something like buying a new set of high quality tires for your car after you got a flat on they freeway that they came to help with and doing so before you got up in the morning.

Base level doesn’t deserve recognition.

starfighter07 · 2021-05-11T15:06:04+00:00

Imagine being such a clown you are proud to post on internet how your man is doing the strict bare minimum for you and how happy you are for it 🤡

Joke aside, I'm always deeply sad to read or hear this kind of stuff from woman. Some of my friends are like that too and I find it horrific how society has brainwashed all of us to celebrate the little sign of respect men show to us ... so depressing

Sallou9 · 2021-05-11T20:41:29+00:00

I'm sorry to keep being this person...

But what the living fuck is wrong with straight people? (No offence guys). This kind of thing in a lesbian relationship is almost unfathomable. To praise my partner for viewing me as a person and not raping me is... absolutely bonkers to me

ohmira · 2021-05-11T20:31:11+00:00

Male hygiene is responsible for a significant amount of BV (how does the bacteria get in there?) and yeast infections (why was there a ph imbalance?) yet it’s all taught as ‘female hygiene problems’. I haven’t had PIV sex in years and guess what? Zero issues with BV and yeast. Stay safe ladies.

sammytheforsaken · 2021-05-11T19:13:12+00:00

I STILL have this initial "oh he's a keeper" reaction when I read something like that and it proves how deeply rooted this issue is. The bar for men really is on the ground. It helps me to imagine myself in that situation and I would never force my partner to continue when they're uncomfortable. It's really not difficult to not be a rapist.

suspended_animation_ · 2021-05-11T18:48:02+00:00

Wow... she's not trolling right? It's a miracle if they don't manipulate you throughout the day when you simply aren't feeling it at any given time

excusemeILY · 2021-05-11T19:10:14+00:00

“Girls, my boyfriend doesn’t rape me. Im soooo lucky, he’s such a catch!!!1!”

/s dear lord save us all

WatermelonSugar47 · 2021-05-11T15:16:34+00:00

Jesus Christ

Chemical-Source-9600 · 2021-05-11T19:27:03+00:00

Uhhh...am I supposed to clap or something?! What kind of accomplishment is this

eveloe · 2021-05-11T16:43:25+00:00

The bar isn’t even on the floor tbh.

Saving themselves from jail isn’t admirable.

EffectiveHoneydew422 · 2021-05-12T11:08:53+00:00

these bare minimums are possibly a mirage anyway. With the first one, he probably cared about his pleasure more and a dry vag is not gon feel good for him either. With the second one, he probably kust had a fap-a-thon being home alone while she was out and didn't have it in him. Spun it the next day for easy brownie points. This seams more likely seeing as these women seam so overjoyed at some bare minimum shit, just seams like they are trying way too hard to convince the world that there bf is not a complete POS.

Jingoboi · 2021-05-11T21:16:38+00:00

Yay! Let's congratulate basic human decency!

basuragoddess · 2021-05-12T01:58:41+00:00

Like... how can you be so happy about that? It’d be disturbing if he didn’t.

roonil_wazlib_the2nd · 2021-05-12T17:45:41+00:00

Omg my boyfriend didn’t rape me, what a gentleman.

Title	The bar is on the ground
Author	shinyjewels
Upvotes	588
Comments	71
Date	May 11, 2021 2:45 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/n9yn39/the_bar_is_on_the_ground/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-bar-is-on-the-ground.757706 https://theredarchive.com/post/757706

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