Please explain this behavior - meanness after sex

ohdiddly · 2022-09-17T00:17:37+00:00

I’ve never experienced anything like this 🤨 I imagine it’s probably because they were fucking men who were always assholes but faked being nice until it was no longer necessary for them

risdeveau · 2022-09-17T00:46:40+00:00

They got what they wanted

Complex-Glass-8539 · 2022-09-17T02:57:44+00:00

3 main possibilities:

(I probably did this while young, but don’t think I’d be seen as mean, but was tempted to act mean) Post nut clarity hit and they realized they don’t like her, they thought they liked her, but were wrong. The easiest way to get someone who likes you to not like you is to be mean…..and them not liking him is the goal.
(I’ve probably done this myself) The relationship wasn’t defined and was never intentioned to be going towards anything serious, however sex happened and she is now acting in a way that is pointing her expectations towards serious. He doesn’t want to be overt and embarrass her, so does little things to indirectly establish boundaries and set expectations. In doing so he misses the mark and overshoots which comes across as mean….this would not apply to overt meanness, but coldness, and tone, which can be perceived as meanness.
(I know I’ve done this). He liked her, they had sex, and she then opens up more of her personality, often directly after sex in the form of pillow talk…..what he finds is someone that is almost counter to the person he believed he slept with. I’ve had this happen multiple times. Fucking drops the act and the real her comes out. In my case, it’s talking about the ex after sex, even if it’s to say how much better the sex was with me, fuck off….I’m not a prop to help you get over him.

toasterchild · 2022-09-17T00:21:50+00:00

Sounds like your friends are into assholes.

YasuotheChosenOne · 2022-09-17T01:01:08+00:00

Perhaps to make it clear that they’re casual?

I imagine it’s how some girls will treat you worse after rejecting you. Like they want it to be clear they have no interest.

dbz19_kai · 2022-09-17T04:36:43+00:00

Post nut clarity.

Horniness fizzles and away and the thing that made you drop your standards to rock bottom disappears, now you're faced with a reminder of how low you dropped your standards

Sudden_Substance7914 · 2022-09-17T03:07:33+00:00

I’ve never done this. Post nut clarity can make me feel a little sad or indifferent but never mean

anaguar · 2022-09-17T03:56:27+00:00

I personally think men do this so they don't get attached to the sex partner. They want to be the man who gets all the women but doesn't give to any women. This is hook up culture in it's most reactionary state.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-09-17T06:05:41+00:00

It probably happens because these men have sex with women that they don't find very attractive because they're horny, and then afterwards they don't want to interact with her.

Me personally I love cuddling every bit as much as sex, and I'd rather not have sex at all then do it with someone I'm not attracted to/excited to hang out with.

JawdropperMGR · 2022-09-17T10:44:09+00:00

Because sometimes our dick fakes out our brain. Us being horny makes us think we actually like and care about that girl, after cumming we sometimes realize that we don't actually care about her.

It's not even faking cause it's real till the orgasm.Can be unfair to the girl, but im sure the opposite happens too.

edit: post nut clarity

DerekMorganBAU · 2022-09-17T00:21:01+00:00

When having sex, women release oxytocin which triggers bonding and leads to deeper emotions. But, men release dopamine which leads a bigger crash and that “post nut clarity” that we men all know about

Next thread it’s over mods close this

Playful_Art_5364 · 2022-09-17T02:04:07+00:00

Post nut clarity. Every dude after jerking off gets disgusted to what he just jerked off to and the act itself.

I assume the same applies here.

Or atleast that’s how my roommate describes it. I don’t do this dating bs

dukesaces · 2022-09-17T02:24:49+00:00

Those men were only interested in the woman for sex. Once they got the sex they wanted, the onus to treat the woman well or even like a human being disappeared.

What's also probably true is that these women are far below that man in terms of attractiveness or SMV and these men have no desire for repeat sex with these women.

The women you've spoken to are picking shitty men who's only redeeming trait is that they're hot or that they're able to seduce her and who are only in it for the sex. Then they're surprised when they get treated like trash after the man has gotten what he wants. Those women need to grow up.

Play_Muted · 2022-09-17T08:54:45+00:00

Why do you guys find it so complicated.

It is post nut clarity.

urbangoth · 2022-09-17T03:05:19+00:00

I've never had this happen. Never. I've never even heard about this happening to friends or women I know. Maybe some exes talk shit behind people's back, but that's it. Sounds unfortunate.

Teflon08191 · 2022-09-17T06:16:18+00:00

Could be any number of things, but the most common explanation will probably be that they finally got what they wanted and don't have to put on an act anymore.

The meanness may be explained by how hard they had to work for it, and how unrewarding it ultimately was. Could also just be annoyance with the woman suddenly becoming overly clingy. Or it could all just be in the woman's head because the guy isn't interested in cuddling all night after sex the way she wants to.

DisasterPeace7 · 2022-09-17T02:45:44+00:00

Cant relate 🤷‍♂️

2022-09-17T16:39:13+00:00

That's his true character.

He had to keep a lid on it and remain somewhat personable during the date or whatever, but now that he's got what he wanted there is no need for further pretense.

Geismos · 2022-09-17T07:50:04+00:00

The women are fat and/or unattractive and the guy took a fucking that he now regrets. Your friends should be happy because were they the opposite sex, it could just end up in a rape charge.

There's also a small % chance that he is just some religious freak who thinks you're now Satan's whore but generally it's probably got to do with the former. I've never seen a dude be mean to a hot girl he just fucked. Food for thought; but not for those women! :)

MyLastBestChance · 2022-09-17T00:30:44+00:00

They desperately want to be wanted by a woman but feel so shitty about themselves that they think less of any woman who will accept them. In other words,

https://images.app.goo.gl/xgmKMuKb9fvv6aDeA

Workaholiconew · 2022-09-17T00:24:48+00:00

Most men arent long term thinkers and are actually quite lazy.

They could keep the good behavior, in order to obtain future sexual returns,

However many forget that in the future they may need sex again, so they relax the grip their had in their behave

Thus, they behave in a more masculine way. aka, meaner to said woman.

greedyleopard42 · 2022-09-17T00:44:37+00:00

can’t relate at all that sucks

AcanthocephalaNew947 · 2022-09-17T04:09:45+00:00

Who… who do y’all be conversating with?!?

figuringMylife · 2022-09-17T03:47:42+00:00

post nut clarity?

wiz-weird · 2022-09-17T09:49:50+00:00

Post nut clarity (PNC) or post nut syndrome (PNS) hits hard.

Question to women here: do you ever have post nut clarity? I wonder if women can even comprehend the drastic shift in mindset and physiology guys can have after orgasming.

From fervent horniness to wallowing in self pity and self-hatred. From high energy to drowsy. From passionate and “in love” to cold and apathetic. These are real changes I and other guys experience after nutting and it happens in less than a millisecond. I am not exaggerating or joking. Has any women experienced similar? PNC also known as kenjataimu.

AstronautLoveShack · 2022-09-17T15:02:10+00:00

Because they got the sex. That's it.

abaxeron · 2022-09-17T19:30:22+00:00

Every single woman I know has spoken about a man's change in behavior after they had sex for the first time.

This is what happens when you have sex with men who had their heart broken too many times.

Probably all of the men I knew - fell in love with their first, and at least developed a strong bond with the second. After two betrayals, results started varying.

anonymousUser1SHIFT · 2022-09-17T23:42:36+00:00

As much as people here want to bash men.

This is actually a well documented thing as has been studied. It has to deal with the flooding of chemicals in the brain.

Women also get this as well.

CFTrillashawn · 2022-09-17T00:47:56+00:00

Post nut clarity, in my experience, if I didnt feel fully into her during the act, or I feel like shes clingy and willing to stay over when im clearly not, Im obviously calling her an uber since I arleady got what i wanted from her and wasnt as good as expected. It is what it is.

AreOut · 2022-09-17T08:57:34+00:00

"why is this fuckboy who has sex with other woman every week not showing positive emotions to me after sex when I'm sooo special"

FlyV89 · 2022-09-17T17:49:33+00:00

This is going to get nasty but... They are talking too much after sex. Just shut the fuck up.

I don't want to know about your insecurities, your problems, your plans for the future (even less if you talk about it as "we") nor what you think we are...

And for fucks sake don't talk about the past. It's not the moment.

I KNOW you feel like it, I know you want to "open up", hell, I know why you do it... You want to bring some emotional closure to the convo so you start fooling around with "feeleeeengs" and "love", and somehow you think it's a good idea to talk about all the mistakes and failed relationships in your past so the dude knows you're "different" now, that you want something serious.

What the guy is hearing is "hey, you know, I've taken lots of dicks up in the ass. Like, LOTS. It's been so tyring, oh my Goshh there are so many dicks out there... I never thought I could have SOOO MANY DICKS in just one life..."

Fastest way to get your ass kicked to the curv.

Buggs my mind reading women here say "how do you know about her N-count" well it's because of you dumbass!

My advice is just to SHUT THE FUCK UP after sex. Women's brains can't mannage that rush of hormones. You never let hormones talk for you.

Besides... Men hormones are GONE after sex.

You know what that means?

The most RATIONAL, LOGIC MACHINE on Earth is laying right to your side. A fucking Terminator T-800 couldn't be more cold than that.

SHUT your DAMN mouth.

If you want to bring relationship, marriage, a bad bussines or a dirty secret, I would advice you to do it during sex actually, not after. During sex you can tell a dude you cheated on him with his best friend and 75% of the time they will say "ok" and just keep at it.

You know, there is something that happens to a lot of men during sex, that they let out an "I love you" without even mean it. Happened to me. Really weird, I was just banging the girl doggystyle and it was so good man I swear, it was so hot and sweet and "slippery"... I just rounded her with my arms, kissed her neck and then I just said...

"I love you".

I was just thinking "what the hell a just said" when she said "I love you more" and started going at it like crazy.

What the fuck? HELL NO. Wait a minute. We just met last week ok?

Control your emotions. And your hormones. That's what I'm saying.

jjlew922 · 2022-09-17T00:26:38+00:00

My guess is the sex made them feel vulnerable and it’s some insecurities on their end. It’s one thing for a man or woman to be turned off after sex, it’s another to be hostile. Sex is a vulnerable act and when it gets too close in intimacy it can trigger some people to push others away. Check out insecure attachment.

Laytheblameonluck · 2022-09-17T03:27:17+00:00

Maybe because of the way they treat guys in bed?

It's really not uncommon now to meet women who objectify men in bed and treat men like sh*t.

The crazy thing is, they come across as inexperienced, until you get in bed with them and realize they are a little too experienced and that it's just relationships with men that they have no experience with.

BeepBeepSaysTheJeep · 2022-09-17T03:35:22+00:00

"Post Nut Clarity" is just a cop-out for playing a shitty bait and switch game. That's probably what these guys are doing.

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boomershack · 2022-09-18T01:08:51+00:00

Post nut clarity. Some dudes feel regret/disgust at what their small head led their big head to do. Well who they did it with specifically.

Yes I linked joe rogan. But it rly do be like that.

Why do some men behave like this?

They never liked the women and "every single woman you know" has given the coochie up to a guy who never liked them.

I-wanna-GO-FAST · 2022-09-18T02:01:25+00:00

Some people who are are hungry enough will eat something they found rummaging through a dumpster. They will probably feel disgusted by the act afterwards, but the hunger made them drop all their standards to go through with it.

2022-09-18T18:40:55+00:00

It’s called post-nut clarity.

Dude thought he liked you, did what he had to do to have sex with you bc he thought it would be an amazing experience between you two.

He nutted, the experience ended, and now he maybe doesn’t see you as he thought he did.

IcarusKiki · 2022-09-19T04:17:32+00:00

Mommy issues

Title	Please explain this behavior - meanness after sex
Author	Academic_Snow_7680
Upvotes	16
Comments	101
Date	September 17, 2022 12:07 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/xg78kh/please_explain_this_behavior_meanness_after_sex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/please-explain-this-behavior-meanness-after-sex.1132758 https://theredarchive.com/post/1132758

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