Older guys, what is some advice you can give to younger guys?

faithinstrangers92 · 2020-11-08T20:13:44+00:00

Don’t waste any time and go for opportunities when you seen them. You can never get time back

jamaljonas · 2020-11-08T19:23:44+00:00

This isn't really a seduction tip but you have got to break out and meet people in college. There is straight up no down side to just talking to people, especially freshman. If you plan on living on campus meet everyone. Build deeper and stronger bonds with people. Trust me when i say you'll enjoy college way more having people you can count on.

For a seduction tip, just don't think with your dick. Also be comfortable with your sexuality.

Badenguy · 2020-11-08T21:35:42+00:00

Women like to talk, even the most shy and introverted are just looking for someone to talk to. Learn to hear and not just wait for your turn to talk. Ask personal questions. Practice on women who work in stores and such, engage in a conversation with zero expectations.

dboyfasho · 2020-11-08T21:36:11+00:00

Only way to get over our non-sensical fear of rejection is to go out and get shot down, biggest realization for me.

RottingAway90 · 2020-11-08T21:45:35+00:00

Figure out who you clearly are if you walked into the village with nothing external. What are your strengths that you’d bring to the group. Write them down. What are your beliefs and values. Once you’re clear on what you bring, believe it, strengthen it, practice it. Anything that distracts you, makes you have self-doubt, etc, go back to the list and see if it lines up. If it does not, it’s garbage, and you can throw it out and keep moving.

Or...think of your ideal woman. Write down on one page of paper everything you’d want your ideal woman be, how she’d appear, how she’d behave, her values, her beliefs, her interests.

Next, circle the top ten.

Read over and memorize those top ten attributes and become that person.

Patopatoduck · 2020-11-08T22:54:52+00:00

Talk to fucking everyone, hot girls, ugly girls, cool guys, weirf guys, befriend everyone and game everygirl, you will have an oppirtunity with everygirl and will give you experience and befriending everyone its just going to help you in life from help with homework to get jobs and get invited to clubs and cool party where you can game, so just aproach everything

Goldenpanda18 · 2020-11-08T22:43:15+00:00

The only real advice I would give my younger self is to think of women realistically. Don't fantasize about them solving all your problems, or making your life any better. Many times they add anxiety you don't need, they can cheat, and hurt you in many ways. Often times the "dream girl" you see in magazines comes with a huge price tag and the closest you'll get to being with a girl like that is paying for lap dances at a strip club.

appmanga · 2020-11-08T21:30:29+00:00

Lots of really good advice in here so far. Here's mine:

Know that women like sex just as much as men. If she trusts you, she'll have sex with you. If you seems like a trustworthy good dude, you're 70 percent there.

anon1880 · 2020-11-08T22:41:51+00:00

ask that certain girl out or you will regret this down the line

fabmarques21 · 2020-11-08T23:43:11+00:00

don't try.

flirt and if you're flirting admit it, never be shameful of what you're doing.

also be funny, nothing beats being funny, not even a hot body or face.

2020-11-08T22:52:13+00:00

Focus on improving yourself , on becoming a better person , on having a strong , good personality, fix your mistakes, and the seduction part will come crawling to you afterward .

ShyDatingftw · 2020-11-08T19:36:20+00:00

Save your fuckin money.

bittr_n_swt · 2020-11-08T20:35:36+00:00

If you think you want to do something, just do it.

Don’t think twice. Just fucking do it. You’ll be surprised what the answer will be or how far you’ll get.

Victory4Life · 2020-11-09T02:22:25+00:00

I should be asking you that, lol. Here’s what I’ve learned that has helped me:

1). Don’t put women on pedestals no matter how hot. You have to treat them like the nerdy librarian chick or the woman walking across the road. Women know when you’re kissing up to them and they’ll treat you like a fan or friend if you do.

2) Be in shape, and don’t have more than a slight gut/dad bod. If you’re overweight, unless you’re super wealthy or the funniest guy within 100 miles, you ain’t going to get the model or skinny waif like beauties. Sad but true. If you have to, take some months off to get that taken care of.

3) Always have something going on and be busy in general; if not then fake it. If you’re sitting around answering her texts every 10 seconds or begging for a girls attention with nothing going on, she will reject you for looking like a loser. This actually helps you anyway since you can learn a new skills, get exercise, make friends in a hobby class, etc.

4) Have some guy friends and go out with the guys to just have fun, with or without women. You don’t know how many times I’ve been at a bar solo looking for a woman and barely got numbers, yet when I just wanted to chill with my guy friends at a club or bar, women would just come up naturally and flirt with the group. Also it adds a layer of masculinity by just joking it up with the dudes and that makes you more attractive.

5) One thing that can be controversial but is so effective is stop PMO’ing or looking at porn and “spanking the monkey” every single night. That will sap you of creative energy, hurt your social skills, and just make it hard for you to hit it off with women because you feel guilty all the time. Also women will pick up a creepy vibe about you which kills your attractiveness. If you don’t believe me, try to abstain for 10 days. You’ll notice you’re more confident and attractive around women. This is one of the quickest habits for self-improvement I think.

6). Listen to women more than you talking. Repeat back what they said and then ask another question. Can’t tell you how many first dates I blew because I didn’t listen and waited my turn to talk about myself the whole time. Ask her questions until she asks you the question, and make the answer quick. Then turn it into another question. Also remember her answers because you will be tested!

7). Have something to eat and drink at your place and clean glasses. Cheese, crackers, wine, etc. are good. Also fresh folded towels in the bathroom instead of wet towels. Have your bedroom, bathroom and kitchen at least clean. If you’re on a date, sooner of later she’s going to need to come by your place; snacks and drinks can give you an excuse to get you back to your place. A bathroom with wet towels is a turn-off and needless to say a crappy bedroom with clothes on the floor if your trying to seduce her. Common sense stuff really.

If you’re in college and you really want to date the smoking hot women, join a fraternity. I didn’t because I wasn’t the jock type but I know some normal guys who did fine in a fraternity. Almost a must if you want those “10’s”.
Nearly every woman particularly out of college wants a guy who has his s**t together. You need to have a game plan on your career and what you want to accomplish in life. If you’re in school, you’re working for it; if you’re just out of school you’re grinding away at it, etc. Do what you love and then push away the naysayers and go for it. If you’re working on your dream whether it’s account exec, plumbing or acting, and have that fire and passion, women will notice you, particularly if you aren’t too overweight. If you love what you’re doing, then the women are just an accessory not the goal anyway. You don’t know how many times women in these other forums are all saying they want a “captain with his shite together”.
Good hygiene, dress nice (duh!)
A cute dog can open up some doors if you like pets.
Post pics on social media of you doing cool things and surrounded by other people. Women will check out your profile early on so make it your social “resume”.

If you want a good book to open your eyes, I’d recommend Corey Wayne’s How to be a 3% Man; gave me so much insight into women and what I was doing right and wrong. Women are emotional creatures and you have to speak the language of emotions; this book will help you see the truth behind her words and actions. Highly recommend it. Hope that helps some.

TheDevilPutD · 2020-11-08T19:24:27+00:00

Find a father figure who knows a thing or two about women who can guide you through the process of becoming a man. Unlike girls, where the process of becoming a woman is part of nature (menstruating), for boys the process of becoming a man has to be facilitated by another male. It doesn't happen naturally.

The other thing would be to find something that is very challenging for you, something that will cause you to stretch, to experience pain and will help you find strength internally. It can be running a marathon, scaling a high mountain, going off by yourself on an adventure. Hey, even taking a survival class and being in the wilderness for a week. Anything goes. The key is to challenge yourself and get out of your comfort zone. You will come out of it with more respect for yourself and bigger balls than you can fit on your pants.

foundadeadthing · 2020-11-08T21:11:35+00:00

Just fucking do it

Lycantree · 2020-11-08T22:41:49+00:00

Do everything you can do, go for it, meet people, join clubs,date, break your hearth, have sex with strangers, drink, party EVERYTHING...Just enjoy it.

College life is the mid term between adulthood and that teeneager years. It means you still have the energy, the time and the health to do every type of shit you want but with more liberty than you had in high school, more possibilities.

mmwako · 2020-11-09T02:06:43+00:00

This a very personal discovery that I dont’t see much around:

If you have a deep, recurring issue in your life, that you feel is impossible to surmount, set out to solve it NOW, not in the future. It can be done. Everything can be solved with patience and will.

Why is this important? You can have a deep personal issue (examples: rejection by females, depression over an ex, feeling you don’t have a purpose, crushing low self-worth, etc), and it can be a part of for life for YEARS (think 15 years or more, maybe all your life), even become your identity, just by postponing it.

In my case, after being depressed over an ex for 10 years, and turning 30, i finally had the thought “shit, if I don’t do something now, this can be my reality forever”. It took me a solid year of introspection and seeking out help to finally grow out of that.

Don’t wait till you are 30. Better your life now. You can do it!

Edit: obviously, emotional issues (called sometimes inner game) get in the way of your seduction skills!

pjwhynot · 2020-11-08T22:09:33+00:00

Get to know as many people as possible. Explore different social circles. Learn about different women and what makes them who they are.

The_James_Bond · 2020-11-08T23:09:31+00:00

When I was 19 my cousin said that at that age women will be with you because of what you want to be, where as at his age 30 women will want to be with you based on what you have achieved.

SpinPlates · 2020-11-09T02:43:54+00:00

I'm 30 and I've been studying game and pick up since I was 20.

I think you should always say YES to invitations. Don't sit stuff out at home. Go out and make friends. Build your social circle. Get numbers and social media accounts from other men that are fun to be around.

My other advice may be looked down upon here but I think going out with the soul intention of gaming is stupid and downright lame. I believe you should know game so you can apply it in organic situations like parties or on dates. Nothing wrong with seeing a beautiful women and approaching her, but guys that walk out of their house on a mission to cold approach is a huge waste of time and is very outcome dependent.

I think you should dive into real hobbies. Especially physical hobbies like weight and endurance training (running or cycling) Just find hobbies to do that make you interesting. Girls don't want to talk to guys that cold approach as a hobby. Go ride motorcycles, or fly hang gliders. Jump into photography or building RC cars...whatever you want to do. Just get hobbies outdoors.

I think most younger guys make game and pick up into a complicated thing. Like there is some secret line of words you can say and bed any women. It doesn't work like that. A quote I always liked (forgot who said it) was "You cannot be a life altering force in one women's life without being a complete embarrassment to another" meaning you can't manipulate attraction with every women. You're better off building a solid base for yourself through fitness and hobbies so you can cast a wide net and attract the most amount of women.

When it comes to actually speaking with a women once you've got her attention I think you should escalate verbally as soon as possible. Establish that you're a man and you're a sexual man. It's better to just screen her early and not waste your time with a girl who just wants her ego boosted because her fuck buddy won't commit to her. Women know if they would sleep with you within the first 20 minutes of talking to you. You're not going to "scare" her off by escalating too fast. You're just saving yourself from wasted time.

TL;DR - Lift weights. Do cool stuff. Don't waste your time.

Jakeallenmusic · 2020-11-08T21:19:11+00:00

Don’t worry to much about women. Concentrate on yourself and work on yourself. They’ll come to you. Also, just because they’re pretty doesn’t mean they’re sexy. Too different things.

Dodechaedron · 2020-11-08T22:30:11+00:00

Study hard, work hard, workout hard and have fun.

CardinalPuff-Skipper · 2020-11-08T22:48:17+00:00

Read How to Win Friends and Influence People. This very much applies to relating to women.
Read the Subtle Art of Not Giving A F###.
Know that nice guys definitely do finish first, pushovers finish last. Be nice, but respect yourself first.
Learn the art of massage.
Learn how to make money and hussle. Money doesn’t create happiness but it sure takes away stress.

coming2grips · 2020-11-08T22:27:40+00:00

Be happy with yourself before trying to make others happy. Be safe, be aware of the baby trap and get tested regularly. Always have an exit strategy. Learn BJJ. Use BuJo. Save money when you can, even if you miss a few trips or parties.

ImportantWords · 2020-11-08T20:14:24+00:00

Fat girl pussy feels the same as skinny bitch. Except that fat girl is gonna actually do some work while the hot bitch is just gonna starfish.

All I’m saying bro, is don’t get too caught up in it. Pussy is pussy. It’s all about the person connected to that shit.

Also, anal without a condom is gross. Your just asking for a UTI and a stank-y dick.

And finally, join a Frat in college. 90% of Men’s struggles with women stem from simply not knowing how to meet them. Cold opens, bars, that shit has a low probability of success. You will have a higher chance of success by simply being in the right place.

DaedricLord1995 · 2020-11-08T21:40:11+00:00

Don’t watch porn

REHuntJr58 · 2020-11-08T23:27:28+00:00

Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Fuck a lotta women, kid, I have no reason to lie to you. Not just one, a lotta women. Richard: Okay, dad, I think we get it. Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Are you getting it? Is it going in anywhere? No, don't show me the pad. I don't wanna see the fucking pad.

Ducharbaine · 2020-11-09T03:16:38+00:00

Life is too short for bad relationships. Never stay with someone just to avoid being alone. Crazy is not worth it. Learn the red flags of emotional abuse and run at the first sign of legit crazy. Its better to ask a girl out and be shot down than to chicken out. More girls like you than will ever let you know about it.

Women are not tender porcelain dolls. Most actually do like to be fucked rough, to some extent. Toss them around, make them feel your strength, once they have consented enthusiastically. Learn how to touch them the way they like, ask them and find out. Learn where the flit is, the gspot, and m spot. Learn that tits are sensitive in more places than just nipples, go for sides and under sides too.

Meet women by doing activities not just sitting around hoping. There is nothing wrong with wanting and liking sex. Refuse to feel guilty about wanting it.

2020-11-09T03:29:32+00:00

Get fit, pursue your career, & build up your finances.

This is the advice we need to be telling to every teen who comes to this sub with a story of a broken dating life. The earlier you start this shit the better. I'm 24, and despite some career progress, I'm just starting on the rest. I'll probably be 26-27 before I'm even close enough to the person I want to be to date the type of women I want to. If you start this stuff as a teen, you'll have you're life figured out by the time you graduate college. This is rare as fuck. Of all the people I met in college, I know only one who is muscular, has a strong career, budgets well, and has a social life he considers fulfilling. Only reason he's single is because he's focused on the aforementioned things and doesn't want to date unless he finds someone great for him (he rejects girls from his social circle all the fucking time). This is a nerdy engineer who plays a shit ton of overwatch and yugioh. He has this kind of female interest in him because he is muscular, career oriented, financially smart, and has a social group with lots of women in it. Doing those 4 things really puts you in the top 10% of men, and it's really all you need to succeed with women. Imagine yourself as a muscular man with a stable career & finances, who has a fulfilling social group, then turn that vision into a reality (tbh the social group is just a bonus, the main focus should just be on fitness, finances, and career, and maybe a reliable hobby or two).

RedEyeBlackEye1 · 2020-11-09T07:23:31+00:00

Looks aren't everything...

But LOOKS CAN MAKE EVERYTHING A HELL OF ALOT EASIER(unless dealing with VERY insecure chicks or golddiggers).

1)haircut and facial hair a must

2)groom Religiously

3)macros and water

4)cardio and lifting...do them

5)never chase,just replace

6)work hard and always stack some bread

7)don't buy shit just bc your eyeballs see it

8)she doesn't really care about you

9)she's not yours,it's just your turn

10)80% of chicks are either too insecure/neurotic/or egotistical to give YOU the time of day

OR

they're time wasting attention whores who only want your attention,NOT you.

Good luck

Ballatrax · 2020-11-09T02:25:06+00:00

If you don't really feel it, it is not worth it.

2020-11-09T05:29:35+00:00

Never compliment a woman on her looks unless you're taking her out on a date and it's obvious that she put some time into her appearance and you want to compliment how she looks on that particular evening. Otherwise, it's a no-no for multiple reasons.

BurntYams · 2020-11-09T06:48:41+00:00

”If she wants to, she will”

If she REALLY wanted to go on a date with you, she would. She’ll move things around and make time. So if she gives an excuse not to without rescheduling, she isn’t interested. If she wants to see you, she would.

If she REALLY wanted to talk to you, she’d text you. It’s 2020 and chicks are ALWAYS on their phone. If it takes her hours to respond, chances are she’s not interested. If she wanted to talk to you, she’d respond.

”Women want what they can’t have”

and lastly

I wish I paid more attention to my art (film school) rather than to women.

iFeelLikeChiefKeef · 2020-11-08T23:05:45+00:00

Ooohh this one cuts me deeply.

I would say put in your work (approaches and openers) early in your game journey. The sooner you no longer need lines, routines, etc, etc. the better off you are. Once you gain confidence and you start to show it, you won't even need to open, women will make conversation with you first.

Do not exude thirstiness, think as if you were already married to the most beautiful woman in the world and thus no other woman would be worth your while. I say this because somedays when I just wasn't feeling it and wanted to just do my own thing, women would act really friendly and flirty. But when I was on the prowl, they would be a bit skittish. So looking back at actions I did back 10 years ago, I gotta say that sometimes there was so much effort for so little reward. Had I done the opposite, I would probably have gotten bigger rewards with little effort, so just let the woman come to you.
This is an interesting aspect of life and it might seem counterintuitive, but when you don't want something, you get it, when you want it, you don't get it.

Also the most important thing for young guys, assume that woman that smiled, stared, etc, etc at you wants you. This might seem a little cocky, but always assume the best scenario for you. Always. Never think that she's just being friendly, or whatever, let her be the one that makes the decision. I missed so many opportunities with very beautiful women when I was younger because I thought, "nah, I'm not that attractive, she's just being friendly." But when I look back now, some of these girls were giving fuck-me eyes and I was being an idiot assuming that I was not in their league or that they were just friendly. You are not a woman, you don't know what type of man she likes, do not make any assumptions that are detrimental to your confidence. ABC Always. Be. Chad... I mean Confident. It doesn't mean that I'm gonna walk up to her and be like "Sup babe? You know you want this hunk," but a woman doesn't stare at a man while playing with her hair just because she thinks he's ugly.

2020-11-09T01:40:52+00:00

Be interested in people. This is the secret to not just picking up women, but doing well at jobs, and making new friends. Be a GOOD LISTENER. You want somebody to be comfortable around you? Be a good, sincere listener. You want somebody to like you? Be interested in them. Don't cut them off. Don't constantly be waiting to interject with your version of their story. Don't judge them or try to explain to THEM what they are probably trying to say. Just be a generous listener, chuckle at their jokes, be sincerely interested.

I used to be hit or miss in social situations. Realizing I am super interested in people was a game changer. People worry too much about "making a great impression." They think that means being "nice" or "funny" or "memorable." It means none of those things. Just be cool, be a good listener, ask questions. You don't have to blow people away and, besides, if you try, 99% you're going to come across as needy, narcissistic, and annoying.

Fluid_Economics · 2020-11-09T02:14:39+00:00

1 - STAY OUT OF DEBT no matter what. This will give you a one-up on the herd.

2 - Cultivate a good friend network. You won't have another chance like this... where everyone is pretty much studying and living in the same places, on the same schedules. In your adult years it feels impossible to get the same. Most successful people I've seen often have a deep friend network stemming from school. From it you gets decades of work connections, love connections, housing & vacation connections, etc.

3 - Time is your most valuable asset. Don't waste it. Everyone has the same amount (e.g. 24/hrs a day)... some people use it wisely, some not.

4 - Lift weights, but correctly. Get a physio to analyze you now and then to make sure you stay balanced.

5 - Do regular cardio. This is your happy drug and amplifies your entire life.

6 - Travel and/or volunteer to get a sense of other peoples' lives.

Hi_From_London · 2020-11-09T11:46:06+00:00

Join clubs. Yoga. Language learning (some of the hottest girls I've ever met have been through language meetups, and there's zero competition). Even stuff like film clubs.

Musical instruments are magic. Teach a girl to play the duet from Heart and Soul and you're 99% of the way there.

Get female friends. How? Start with a few male friends. Find an excuse (Superbowl, birthday, friday post-work drinks, whatever) and say "Me and a few friends are hanging out at place X, come if you like" and she'll invite friends too.

When dating, don't sit opposite a girl. Sit beside her if possible. Avoid the "job interview".

Take the basic advice on this sub seriously. Work out 3x a week. Learn a language on Duolingo. Work on your hobbies. Being able to talk passionately about something is gold.

The most attractive thing you can be is: Busy, working on stuff you love. For a girl a relationship means buying into a new lifestyle. Is yours one she'd love to be a part of?

Get over your physical defects. Missing a hand? 5 foot two? No front teeth? Doesn't matter. Girls see you the way you see yourself. If you strut like a stud that's the energy you'll project.

Learn to handle rejection. If she says No. Just say Okay. Maybe throw in a compliment. But above all, retain your frame.

Check out r/creepypms. Avoid those errors!

Cut your texts by half. Nothing destroys your mystique like "the paragraph". Call her if you want. But avoid sending The Lord of the Rings by text.

Hot girls are just as available as more homely looking ones. There's logic behind this (trust me!). Their hotness means they attract confident older douche bags. This triggers (eventually) a defence mechanism, so they can be more stand-offish. Also, the guys they attract are looks-driven, so are disillusioned when the actual person doesn't match their shallow assumptions. Hot chicks can cycle through low-quality relationships as a result. Homely girls are different (waiting for be asked out), but hot girls are just as available in the end.

Retain frame. Girl shit tests you? Stay calm. Girls invites you to her place. Stay calm. Your trousers catch on fire? Stay calm. You are Clint Eastwood.

Travel. Even a weekend somewhere makes you more interesting. And travel increases likelihood of meeting a girl by orders of magnitude.

When ditching a girl, do it fast. The moment you know things are definitely not going to work out. Don't mess her around. Shower her with compliments, and just say you want different things. Never, ever say anything negative, and certainly not about how she looks! If you are lucky, you'll stay acquaintances, and be the sort of person she enjoys bumping into (not always possible, but I've observed how many great seducers have former lovers as confidents and friends).

Okay, final thing. Kissing a girl for the first time is the result of slow escalation. Flirting. Getting closer. Touching in sequence (elbow, arm, leg). Ideally it's a smooth transition. If she reacts uncertainly to the kiss, retain frame. If she's sees you are cool, she'll be cool too. If you are panicking, she'll pick up on clues that you are out of your depth.

You goal should be to be the kind of guy who knows lots of girls, and gets invited to social occasions by them. You'll meet all their friends, and have a constant supply of amazing people before you. Achieve that and the whole App dating and cold approach stuff can be avoided.

crabsis1337 · 2020-11-08T23:21:44+00:00

Emotional intelligence, embracing sensitivity and empathy instead of fighting it is incredibly attractive to HEALED women. The tough guy stuff is childsplay, don't invest in it, don't numb your soul.

Treyturbo · 2020-11-09T00:24:19+00:00

Get familiarized with the clitoris. Learn how to quickly find it with your fingers and how to make it respond.

You can be don Juan Casanova but if you suck at pleasing them then it'll be like being with a girl who sucks at pleasing you. Practice makes perfect!

mgenuine · 2020-11-09T02:14:06+00:00

Learn to de-program yourself from societal brainwashing and become a critical independent thinker. This is what's called a bad boy.

LakersAreTerrible25 · 2020-11-09T03:15:25+00:00

I'm 22 and have my last year of software engineering to go in university. Even though I'm not extremely old I've certainly learned a lot from prior mistakes I've made. Keep yourself busy and accept potential sacrifices that need to be made. For me, I have to do 6 classes a semester, go to the gym for 3 full body workouts a week, on top of studying a fair bit. All while still having a 3.8-3.9 gpa in my program. Not to mention the cooking and cleaning that needs to be done on a daily basis. The cost for that is maybe being able to hang with only one friend or chick per week, if I'm lucky. There's only so many hours in a day and you just can't simply do it all, unless lacking in things like health and sleep. Don't listen to people saying you can party, stay fit, get good sleep and maintain a 4.0 at the same time. Thats just not possible unfortunately. Accountability is huge, especially when you're 18 years old and up

biscuit310 · 2020-11-09T05:00:28+00:00

Everybody is self conscious. Everybody has something about themselves they'd like to change. Don't worry so much about what other people might be thinking about you, because they're probably worried about what you're thinking about them. Be kind to people.

Most of us have stories we tell ourselves, and sometimes these stories limit us. "I'm not smart enough, I'm not rich enough, I'm not attractive enough, I'm bad with women, I'm bad at [x]." It's useful to sometimes consider how you might be fooling yourself, and how you're benefitting from that story.

Success is often the result of regular effort. Do the right thing even when it's hard. Courage isn't the absence of fear. It's ok to make honest mistakes.

Try to be joyful. Savour good things and the people you love.

big_thick1 · 2020-11-09T13:23:13+00:00

Never send a dick pic unless she ask for it.

theforgeproject · 2020-11-09T18:12:00+00:00

I’m 43 and have been around the block quite a bit. When my son goes to Highschool I’m going to tell him to do two things: develop self discipline (which I’m introducing now at 9) and learn what your codes are and live by them.

Self discipline is the heart of everything. Without it you let the environment and the people in it (including women) dictate what you do. There’s a lot to it but that’s all I can say for now.

To get an example for what codes are look up various warrior codes: Bushido, Marines, Army, Medieval knights etc. Then take some time and think about what your own codes are and live by them no matter what.

These two things will lay the mental foundation for everything else as you get older

JakeMullerRE · 2020-11-08T23:21:23+00:00

Let go of your ex and definitely do not try to get them back. It's not worth the effort. You wouldn't chew old, used bubblegum expecting it to taste fresh and new.
View women objectively, for what they truly are in the here and now. Not for who and what you want them to be.
Feel the fear and do it anyway.

VikrantPatel · 2020-11-09T02:13:49+00:00

Women go by what they hear, men go by what they see

MeeloP · 2020-11-09T02:15:27+00:00

Shoot your shot.

The1nonlyno1 · 2020-11-09T03:33:25+00:00

As a Father of 5...remember this...kids are costly as hell, not just for Christmas!

mgesczar · 2020-11-09T04:12:05+00:00

Treat women with the same respect you would demand towards your mom or sisters

4G3ntl3m4n · 2020-11-09T09:36:46+00:00

Don’t be nice to a woman just to sleep with her and then get upset that she won’t do it. It doesn’t make you a nice guy and it doesn’t work.

Check out r/NiceGuys and r/NiceGirls in case you’re confused as to what I’m talking about.

2020-11-09T11:49:43+00:00

Not every girl u meet you have to fuck, some times girls can do more for you then your own boys. Remember that.

Dwaynedibley24601 · 2020-11-09T13:48:54+00:00

Don't marry until you are 40 if at all. There is no upside for men in marriage anymore. Get a prenup. Enjoy your 20's and 30's they are the best years of your life... Do what you want, who you want, and travel. Put the legally allowed max into your 401K or 403 B or Roth IRA compound interest in a magical thing. Sleep with anything that catches your eye... you will regret the ones you didn't sleep with more than the ones you did. Wear a condom. Wear sunscreen. Get a checkup every year without fail. NEVER EVER EVER EVER send a dick pic to ANYONE no matter how much you are attracted to them you will regret it later. (No woman ever appreciated receiving a dick pic even if they ask). Learn to accept the word NO from love interests and MOVE ON, never be the creepy guy, women only want what they cannot have. Did I leave anything out?

Nayilenja · 2020-11-09T15:34:07+00:00

put on some muscle, dont get a baby, dont get yourself in debt over material bullshit, fuck as many girls as you can this will help you later on in life on how to screen for quality chicks. good luck bro.

faithinstrangers92 · 2020-11-09T16:02:55+00:00

A pretty important bit of advice I'm still learning is 'see people for who they really are, not what you want them to be"

Fantasizing is nice, but it can seriously lead you to waste time and energy, and set yourself up for disappointment.

Perhaps she just doesn't like you mate. Try to stop dwelling on it and recognise the reality so you can act accordingly.

wolfman86 · 2020-11-09T18:23:29+00:00

It’s get said far too much, but it is important, set up a saving plan. Nothing insane, just enough so that in 10 or so years you’ll have a house deposit, or will at least be close to it.

Your mental health is an insane priority. If you’re happy, it effects everything. Work, relationships, jobs....you can achieve so much more.

bongkiki · 2020-11-09T20:19:15+00:00

Best advice I can give younger guys is date older women in their 40-50's.

pg_rated · 2020-11-10T03:56:49+00:00

No one is coming to save you, not a man, woman, partner, mentor, whatever. You have to be your own hero.

Get rid of your negative self talk, treat yourself like you would a dear friend, be kind and patient and be constructive with yourself. Focusing on your short comings in a non-constructive way is destructive. Be honest, work on your faults and appreciate your strengths but those aren't what define you as person.

Women are attracted to people that are confident, happy and fun. If you don't feel that way about yourself then change your life to achieve that, women will naturally be attracted to you more as you achieve these goals. Looks and money don't matter as much as you think they do, and they matter more to superficial partners that you'll quickly tire of.

traviij · 2020-11-16T02:53:51+00:00

The world is better than the confines of your room & what the World Wide Web has to offer.

Get out there. Participate. Allow yourself to stumble out the gate and be awkward at times. Any skill & ability takes time and work, this is no different. It’s not a vindication or a knock against you, it’s part of the deal. Commit to the person you want to be completely. Make goals that challenge you, maybe even make you nervous. Once you understand that you desire it, it’s always in the back of your mind, and if you don’t start working towards it, you will feel guilty - this creates a healthy bit of anxiety.

Focus on constructive habits, that redeem and make you feel good about yourself, and are productive. Exercise, both aerobic and anaerobic are a necessity for any high-functioning human being.

Completely 86 social media, video games and porn. Get that out of your life, and I can’t stress this enough.

Step forward proudly into the world, and things will happen that will be magnificent. Good luck!

rover351g · 2020-11-09T14:52:54+00:00

I know if I wrote an advice letter to 18 year old me, 18 year old me would just laugh it off and say I didn't know what I was talking about. he was a jerk.

Anyway, I would say, talk to everyone, learn from everyone. Make friends with all kinds of people. Be confident and learn to be confident. All the fears you grew over your teenage years mean nothing - it doesn't matter what other people think of you. When you get past the lie that it does, you've almost become a man.

Be a gentleman, respect women. Don't watch too much porn, it'll warp your mind. Learn about what women expect and want, figure out what you want from them. There's so much more but that's a start.

The_James_Bond · 2020-11-09T00:12:54+00:00

Don’t waste any time on video games or anything of the sort. I made that mistake and I’m a lonely POS as a result

PhnX_RsnG · 2020-11-09T01:45:23+00:00

Stay single until you’re 59. Get married only if you want to be miserable.

veeeerain · 2020-11-08T23:27:46+00:00

You can join a frat if you want, but just make sure through the rush process if you think your cut out for it. And when I mean cut out for it I mean making sure you can balance partying with your classes etc. my buddy rushed a frat and he ended up doing horrible in classes cause of the constant partying, was also his decision but there’s that. Also he dropped the frat cause of how much they made him drink and he hated that too. So I’d be weary, if your not into partying ur not into partying and that’s fine. There’s always other places to meet people, clubs especially. Literally my first two/three weeks of freshman year I would sit next to a different person everyday in lectures and randomly at lunch and just introduce myself and get to know people. Don’t be afraid to do this because all freshman come in wide eyed not knowing a lot of people. They would be more than happy to talk to you.

2020-11-09T00:15:19+00:00

Dont give a shit and dont trouble yourself with what they think of you

Ducharbaine · 2020-11-09T03:19:19+00:00

With women,, don't buy their friendship and don't go out of your way for them, do things for them, or buy them things until AFTER sex. even then, don't do it much. (Ask me how I once had a girl ask me to fuck her, then I screwed it up by helping her too much) Chivalry is suspicious behavior these days beyond basic politeness.

2020-11-09T04:37:37+00:00

If you’re short, don’t expect too much. Women are shallow as fuck, no matter what the PUA “gurus” say.

0_none_0 · 2020-11-09T00:55:27+00:00

Buckle up its only going downhill after college..

pasteglory · 2020-11-09T06:28:53+00:00

We all have good and bad qualities. You don’t need to be perfect and you don’t need to be superman to get a girlfriend.

daproest1 · 2020-11-08T22:19:22+00:00

I don’t even know where to begin. I’d tell myself so much at your age. (Early 30s now)

coming2grips · 2020-11-08T23:00:35+00:00

Research social archetype's, find one that attracts the types of potential romantic/sexual partners you prefer. Find info on that archtype and build into it. Course selection, personal grooming employment, etc

Understand that if you aren't comfortable being that type of person then you may need to shift your preference's to other partners

shreqboi · 2020-11-09T00:36:43+00:00

Save your money and invest it. You don’t need to take them out on fancy dates all the time...

DubDeuceInThisBih · 2020-11-09T00:47:16+00:00

Keep your priorities in order. The average guy is chasing women instead of chasing success.

Psychological_Fee294 · 2020-11-09T01:14:52+00:00

Dear youngsters,

I strongly advice you, to be a MAN. The term “being a man” has become controversial, but yeah I do mean it in the way that you have to be leader. That means no chasing!

sjwjs · 2020-11-09T01:19:51+00:00

Stay in shape.

Majorxerocom · 2020-11-09T01:25:52+00:00

Every girl can be a 10 if you look hard enough

SanjiNobody · 2020-11-09T01:54:27+00:00

Read Model by Mark Manson.

the_cosmic_enabler · 2020-11-09T02:00:00+00:00

Sell drugs and/or be in a band. Helps a lot if your drugs/band are good

recyclablebanthas · 2020-11-09T02:27:36+00:00

1

By younger I mean high school guys And those about to become college age.

College is a great time, but there's definitely a misconception that it's the only time you'll have to meet a lot of people and after that it's a social wasteland, etc.

That's bs, honestly.

However, college is a great time to learn how to create your social life, which can help you develop your social skills/seduction skills and expose you to new people.

Sure, you'll meet people because everyone is in a concentrated area, living in dorms, going to campus, etc. But there are so many ways to encounter new people.

College clubs
Clubs even outside of college that are organized around a variety of interests.
Meet-ups
Hash house harriers
Social partner dance communities: west coast swing, Argentine tango, salsa, etc.

So while you can easily find these things on a college campus, these things can be used to build or rebuild a social circle long after college.

I've rebuilt my own social circle from scratch at least 4 times using these things. It's not unrealistic to have 3-5 casual dating situations going on at the same time if you have multiple social circles you hang with. (At least during non-pandemic circumstances.)

2

On the subject of the pandemic, whether we like it or not, it affects social situations, including seduction.

So as a person nearing college age:

Consider going to school abroad in an area that's handled the pandemic better and is open again. If you can find a place that fits your academic goals and requirements.
Or if you must stay in a place that is still under social distancing, etc, be patient. College groups will probably still tentatively be around. It might just take more work to find in-person events.

2020-11-09T02:32:03+00:00

fuck her right in the p*ssy (sorry for swearing)

Raii-v2 · 2020-11-09T02:37:51+00:00

Lift frequently and lift heavy.

Build the foundation for your aesthetic growth. Read. Become well rounded.

2020-11-09T03:31:59+00:00

Be nice to your family at all times, they’re the only people who really care and make your breakups with your girlfriends amicable so when your 40 and you get drunk you can call someone

Train3162 · 2020-11-09T03:37:41+00:00

Make sure your teeth are on point. Get braces now if need be

tsupaper · 2020-11-09T03:47:45+00:00

Don’t be thirsty

LukeIronman · 2020-11-09T04:21:57+00:00

Only three advices, FIRST, BE YOURSELF!, don't waste time trying to follow patterns that you're uncomfortable with, cause girls can see this miles away. SECOND, ENJOY YOUR HIGH SCHOOL/COLLAGE cause thess phases probably will be the best times of your school life, so basically all i could say is TRY EVERYTHING YOU WANT AND TAKE EVERY OPPORTUNITY THAT WILL APPEAR TO YOU and i said in every aspect of the school life. THIRD KNOW YOURSELF, these times are for know yourself better, what you likes/dislikes, what are you passions, goals, your triggers/fears/angers, to develop mental and phsycal skills cause let me put you this in a simply phrase YOU DON'T HAVE LIMITS NEITHER MENTAL AND PHYSICAL, the only limit is you

When you combine this three, you'll be someone genuine and that is like a magnet to girls, the next part will be up to you

jejunum32 · 2020-11-09T04:22:23+00:00

Lol by older I mean 8th graders and by younger I mean 7th graders jfc

rawrxxdxxd · 2020-11-09T04:51:27+00:00

Network. Meet everyone, know everyone; and greet them by name whenever you see them. Don’t chase girls, chase success, your passions, and make friends,. Girls come easily as a byproduct of that.

Think of college as the ultimate networking convention. Instead of passing around business cards, you will pass your phone number, social media accounts, and maybe your e-mail address if you are clever enough to build some kind of mailing list ir something.

Become valuable to everyone you see and that will follow you for life.

Edit:spelling

KrullTheWarriorKing · 2020-11-09T05:03:52+00:00

Talk to EVERYONE. Start a conversation where ever you go, don't force it, but at least begin with "Hello." And a "How are you doing?"

SkatingOnThinIce · 2020-11-09T05:55:28+00:00

It's not the money or the car or the size of your dick

It's the confidence that money, cars and big dicks give you.

Just be confident and forget about the rest.

2020-11-09T06:02:11+00:00

Buy a weeding ring a women will throw pussy at you. Always try to have 3 girlfriends.

KingCeddy24 · 2020-11-09T06:34:28+00:00

fuck as many women as you can and take that number to your grave

VDKay · 2020-11-09T07:18:51+00:00

If you are at collage or school (generally, a student), try to fuck everything that moves. No remorse, no hard-feelings on yourself, no judging
Decide who to marry/LTR after 26+. If you do have an LTR, don't spend your teens and early adult life with one person for more than 1 (at most 2) years.
Take care of your body. I don't mean get ripped, but establish healthy eating habits, learn to cook, and pick-up exercising habits that you can and will stick with through your 20's. Chances are that you will be able to maintain a relatively healthy physique through your life, and your 30/40/50yo self will thank you. Also, Having a healthy average physique may not be much as a 20yo, but it surely keeps you ahead of most of the competition in your 30's and 40's
Always choose the mediocre girl who will go "Fuck yeah!" for you over the stunner who are always "meh.." about you (unless it is an ONS)

kamikaze-boombox · 2020-11-09T07:37:22+00:00

Be proactive in taking the first step and say hello! The worst thing that can happen is that you'll get shrugged off. But, at least you'll be able to shift your mindset overtime to focusing on and enjoying the process of an interaction rather than the outcome.

FlanneryODostoevsky · 2020-11-09T07:40:29+00:00

Do not give a fuck. Fuck with the people, women and dudes, who fuck with you. Rejection is apart of all things in life so let it hit you but remember you deserve more than a door slammed in your face. So keep your head up and move on.

But also remember sometimes you have to let yourself hurt. The hurt isnt permanent abd ita not final, but it is real and ignoring it is exactly what most the happy/successful people in the world do. So be real with yourself and others.

2020-11-09T10:08:31+00:00

Overweight unattractive guy here.

When in a nightclub, bar, house party. Generally women are looking to hang out and have fun. This is free of stress and a way to let their hair down. Things they are attracted to are people who seem to be having the most fun. So my advice is be two drinks a head of everyone else if you have low confidence and get you but on the dance floor and encourage everyone else to join. I am a good dancer -so I always become friends with the best looking girl and tell her- hey lets kick some ass on the dance floor. Once every girl sees you dancing with the best looking girl in the room they won’t see you as a threat or horn dog. It’s important your respectful to women/men -understand boundaries and let them talk-listen. But most importantly. Have a great time and send out good strong loving vibes. Real girls love that stuff.

idontmeananyofthis · 2020-11-09T11:41:21+00:00

Use a condom. Save your money. Buy a house. Be financially independent. Fuck bitches make money

2020-11-09T11:48:08+00:00

High-quality guys have higher aims in life. Sex is literally beside food and shelter as the most basic human needs. Do not make it the be-all and end-all goal of your life the same way you do not put "eating" as your main motivation and goal in life. Set a BIG goal for yourself, what you want to achieve and do in life and go for it. Try to network hard and make friends with everyone. having a large social circle will benefit you in many ways, getting girls pale in comparison. If you are not the most social person out there, go learn how to be one. In recent years it became normalized for people to identify as "introvert" and use it as a "legitimate" excuse to shut the outside world out. This only harms you. nothing should prevent you from making new friends and knowing more and more people. not being able to connect to people is a real disadvantage.

snapsie · 2020-11-09T11:55:24+00:00

people are waiting for a silver bullet ( an all purpose advice, magical words) that's never gonna come, just divide and conquer your flaws and insecurities. once you start producing good in the world, good things will follow.

carpetRug2 · 2020-11-09T11:59:22+00:00

Just be funny and the rest is easy

Coachjoey · 2020-11-09T12:46:14+00:00

Learn HOW to flirt. Flirt with them and learn to pick up on the slightest interest.

scoteeho · 2020-11-09T12:52:25+00:00

Focus on building your confidence up to be authentic than worrying if a girl likes you so you have to please them.

Slowmexicano · 2020-11-09T13:44:25+00:00

For me the biggest change between now and then is confidence. For a high schooler this can be difficult since confidence is built with time and experience and so many things are out of your control. For example my parents give me little freedom at that age and I had no money. If you find yourself having low confidence so some self reflection and fix that. Don’t like the way you look? Start diet and exercise. No car? Find a hustle. Don’t know how to talk to a girl. Just have conversations with family and friends. Fix yourself first.

CochinoChingon · 2020-11-09T16:37:08+00:00

read self improvement books, Ideally 2 books /week, at least start with 1 book/month

work out everyday, even if its as little as 10 squats/push-ups

learn a skill-- go to home depot/lowes website and see what their schedule is for workshops. stuff like, repairing/replacing a tile, fix a leaky faucet/toilet, patch a hole.

get a hobby or two

learning skills & hobbies help boost your confidence. Above money, and muscles, female are more drawn to confidence.

hone your wit, sense of humor. If your confident enough to approach the most attractive female in a bar and can make her laugh. You'd be the biggest threat in said bar.

urbeatagain · 2020-11-09T17:35:16+00:00

Watch out for priests?

Redo1970 · 2020-11-09T18:12:30+00:00

Be you, if you have to front to get her interested, then the relationship can only deteriorate from there.

Allldasmoke · 2020-11-09T19:04:06+00:00

Don’t take life seriously and wear a condom at all fucking times

ImmodestPolitician · 2020-11-10T11:51:03+00:00

Dating gets easier in your mid 30s. Swipe dating makes it very difficult to date attractive women in their 30s if you are in your 40.

They automatically set the upper age limit for women as age+10 years.

TANKER_06 · 2020-11-11T06:04:26+00:00

STAY AWAY from debt. This includes loans, credit cards and instalments for anything that isn't life and death. Financial stability is crucial, more so as you grow older. Have a plan with what you're going to do after college, and work on it.

Experience matters. Talk to women. Even if it's just to develop a friendly relationship. You can get all the advice, techniques and lines to use, but it doesn't matter if the whole time you're at home. Go out, keep meeting new women and people in general.

Failure is inevitable. You will fail now, and you will fail no matter how good you are in flirting and seduction. Understand that most of the time (assuming you are doing things right), it's not you, it's her. It's not her fault, just that shit happens. She had a bad day at school. It's that time of the month. She is stressed or depressed and so many more reasons.

It's your life. So put it first. Study hard, play hard. Rest when you need to, and girls should fit your schedule, not vice versa. Now, if you are putting off replying to a girl because you're on a 12-hour gaming binge, yeah, you might want to look into that problem.

Your look matters. Not what God gave you, but what you can fix like your clothes and style. Like everything here, there is nuance. Hygiene is a given. Stay in shape (and round isn't it) and wear clothes that are either evergreen or present-day stylish. Go to a decent barber. Ask them to recommend a haircut for you. Not everyone can rock facial hair. Be honest with yourself. If you (and everyone around you) believe you can't, don't.

Have fun. Enjoy yourself, even better if you can find a way to do so while in school and working. But be in the moment. If you take a woman out and all you are doing is fretting and thinking if everything is ok, you ain't having fun.

CJ090 · 2020-11-11T14:12:57+00:00

When talking to girls don’t answer questions direct. Talk shit and flirt

thewhitedevil__ · 2020-11-13T20:34:28+00:00

I'm 21. And Just. Do. It.

Focus on yourself. Put yourself first. Never under any circumstances chase a woman. You're the prize. She's lucky to be in your life .

Women come and go. So don't trip.

CUMMSLUT67 · 2020-11-15T07:44:30+00:00

I'm 53 years old and my advice is be real ALWAYS. People that aren't real are a waste to time.

Title	Older guys, what is some advice you can give to younger guys?
Author	Andrew__IE
Upvotes	588
Comments	251
Date	November 8, 2020 7:08 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/jqhey5/older_guys_what_is_some_advice_you_can_give_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/older-guys-what-is-some-advice-you-can-give-to.1299359 https://theredarchive.com/post/1299359

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