Did you ever consider the possibility of divorce at the beginning of your marriage?

boltmaker12 · 2024-07-31T00:18:03+00:00

I didn't. When I made those vows I knew that there would be plenty of days where we would be thrown some nasty curves and I knew I would have to learn how to get through it. My ex expected every day to be slow pitch, underhand, right down the middle of the plate.

Historical-Basis-196 · 2024-07-30T20:30:29+00:00

Never. I took the marital wows seriously and believed we were "each other"s persons." Hindsight is 20/20, now it's clear that despite some great times at the beginning of the relationship, I had settled down with the wrong person.

BigPapaJava · 2024-07-30T14:39:16+00:00

I did. My parents divorced when I was 10 and I nearly broke off the engagement before the wedding because of some of the stuff I was dealing with from her at the time. I was committed to marrying and having a family with her so I followed through.

Years later I have a 6 year old daughter I love very much, but all the issues I was concerned with before marriage never got any better. People are going to be who they are.

DivorceTA1988 · 2024-07-30T12:52:39+00:00

Nope, both sets of Grandparents married over 50 years, my parent were over the 25 year mark at the time. Divorce was not something I was ever going to consider. She did the one thing that made me want to go through with it which was tell me she didn’t love me anymore, physically leave and break our marriage vows.

I don’t think she physically cheated before she told me she wanted a divorce but there was no chance of reconciliation once she started dating other people.

xjeeperx · 2024-07-30T09:39:40+00:00

Nope

whirlevh · 2024-07-30T09:25:31+00:00

Yes, before and during, untill it inevitably happend.

Own-Customer5373 · 2024-07-30T06:56:33+00:00

Yes marriage (all about money on the bright side are beautiful kids that she will use to tell you how much you suck at making money for them and her. Except on payday. That gets you like 5 fucking minutes of hard core proof that it’s about the $$$ to be clear she’s checking the bank account not me

Grand_Alps9214 · 2024-07-30T06:11:14+00:00

… yes even before we were married.

We still went through with it though. I should have called it off. But my balls werent big enough. Too close to the wedding. Bla bla bla.

Why? Ever since we signed the prenup she withdrew from me and “us” as a unit. In turn I hoped once officially married it will get better again.

Obviously it didn’t.

masterof-xe · 2024-07-30T03:28:15+00:00

Nope, I was sure we were perfect for each other. She got it in her head that I can't give her the love she needs. Also she got the echo chamber support from her friends. Oh let's also include that emotionally cheated on me and after the divorce hooked up with him. She had him at her house for the last 4 weeks.

Gullible_Grocery5885 · 2024-07-30T01:33:42+00:00

Made it 6 months before she got the boot

Independent_Owlz · 2024-07-30T01:12:32+00:00

“There’s nothing we can’t work out”.

Heavy_Guitar_4848 · 2024-07-30T01:07:17+00:00

Thought about it frequently and would get stressed out thinking about the logistics.

MoronLoserF · 2024-07-30T00:31:25+00:00

I did think of breaking it up right before my first marriage. The night of the wedding, the week after wedding and also many times through out the first year. I had a lot of things that constantly irritated me. But every time I tried separating she came running back.

I had hope. I didn’t realize at the time, that she was a pathological liar.

Strict-Front-2375 · 2024-07-30T00:18:54+00:00

Nope. In fact, I didn't even consider it to be a possibility until she left; even at that stage where she gets 'weird' overnight, because she just cheated, I didn't consider. Heck, even after I found out the reason she had been so 'weird' the past 10 weeks was because she was having an affair, I thought it wasn't really going to happen.

But, I had a pretty blindsided divorce

kittykittykitty92 · 2024-07-30T00:18:12+00:00

Honestly, I had/have the idea of it. Had some concerns before getting married, we got eloped because we had an oopsie baby and wanted both of them on the insurance plan. We talked about marriage before we found out she was pregnant. Been married 4 months now and am looking into divorce soon. Previous concerns are still there and she's gotten meaner, less considerate, more selfish and many things since the kid was born. Understanding she went through/still going through things but I see the writing on the walls and the abuse is never okay. I'm not gonna be this traditionalist of staying in a marriage because that's the commitment. My life is short and I refuse to have my kid see us miserable together for the sake of a piece of paper.

atomicnugget202 · 2024-07-30T00:17:51+00:00

No, I always believed no issue was too big or too small that couldn't be worked through. Since the love for them was unconditional.

SnooDucks2052 · 2024-07-30T00:08:54+00:00

Yes!!! She threw all my clothes out HER house when I didn’t tell her where I went when I left during an argument SHE started.

Melodic-Grapefruit-4 · 2024-07-29T23:31:49+00:00

No, I said it a few times in the heat of a moment, which now I truly regret.

Mental-Science1288 · 2024-07-29T23:20:32+00:00

I’ve entertained it every single day since she told me during an argument in year one:

“I made a mistake marrying you.”

You don’t forget something like that. Ever.

WittyBeautiful7654 · 2024-07-29T22:49:57+00:00

If you'd of asked me the day I met her. I would have told she was fonns lesbe me. I knew the whole time she was gonna leave me. I told her she was gonna leave me .

HoneydewLeading7337 · 2024-07-29T22:29:31+00:00

Not even remotely.

I would have thought I had a higher likelihood of getting hit by lightning or s meteor.

dukeofthefoothills1 · 2024-07-29T22:13:05+00:00

No; I was fully confident she was “the one” 35 years ago. I didn’t believe in divorce and still don’t.

Sharp_Preference7083 · 2024-07-29T21:57:41+00:00

No.

I expected some moments may be less happy than others throughout the marriage, but I was committed to my partner for life and would hope we could work together and overcome any issue we had because ultimately we loved one another. I wanted to live the rest of my life with her by my side.

She had other ideas.

NorseVegan · 2024-07-29T20:37:13+00:00

Yes. After comments she made to me trying to hurt me. Cutting me off of sex, and countless other things. Yes. I was even talking to a counselor today about things and she said wow how come you didn’t divorce 16 years ago. Good question… I should have.

TraditionalTackle1 · 2024-07-29T20:31:46+00:00

Yes we went from having sex 2-3 times a week to once a month. No amount of taking about it did anything. Finally I just gave up and stopped asking. Now we don’t have sex at all.

0neMinute · 2024-07-29T20:20:26+00:00

No , had the talk about what marriage meant after 7 years of dating.

1 year into marriage we had a kid, she left when he turned 2, came back another baby , left again at 2 for second baby. This time she went for divorce and here we are.

Kids change things .

ReallyRealOrNot · 2024-07-29T20:16:09+00:00

No.

Not at all.

A commitment is a commitment.

It is a LIFETIME COMMITMENT.

NilEntity · 2024-07-29T20:13:48+00:00

No. Or I discounted it as a possibility so unlikely to be an impossibility. " Sure, divorce is a thing, but that's for other people, not us ...." Idiot ...

Passive_Tuna · 2024-07-29T20:10:42+00:00

No. Even though things weren’t perfect, life was in flux and there was optimism. Never seriously considered it until after few years of marriage she didn’t seem anymore comfortable with me or any further along in improving herself in any way personally besides the daily requirements of motherhood.

Have been struggling with the thought since the kids were babies. 15 years now. Of course, when they were tiny, I couldn’t realistically imagine leaving them or the horror of some stranger raising my kids.

Chris_Chilled · 2024-07-29T20:08:37+00:00

jambazaza540 · 2024-07-29T20:00:06+00:00

The word was not part of my vocabulary or my worldview. It was as close to an impossibility as it could be. But now, I am neck deep in the middle of one. Life is funny like that.

ImRealHighYo · 2024-07-29T20:00:04+00:00

When she brought up marriage I asked her if she realized how much bullshit went into getting a divorce. We were already on shaky ground, that statement pissed her off. We were married less than 2 years 😂

ooomn57 · 2024-07-29T19:53:38+00:00

For me, I had zero anticipation of it coming!

Title	Did you ever consider the possibility of divorce at the beginning of your marriage?
Author	ooomn57
Upvotes	12
Comments	47
Date	July 29, 2024 7:53 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ef90rl/did_you_ever_consider_the_possibility_of_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/did-you-ever-consider-the-possibility-of-divorce.1525707 https://theredarchive.com/post/1525707

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