What do you personally consider to be "a lot" in terms of N-count, and why?

midnight2196 · 2018-09-18T12:03:02+00:00

I mean,the girl has a number higher than her own god damn age. I think of that as "a lot".

lalabats · 2018-09-18T16:46:49+00:00

So I guess I'm a prude, but I've always thought any more than 5 is a lot. All of my friends have no more than 3, including their current BF/Husband. I've got one, my husband.

DandDsuckatwriting · 2018-09-18T12:09:34+00:00

God, I can't stand this sub most of the time. It's just people spewing opinions with zero facts to back them up.

Here are some actual statistics:

Stable marriage rate is negatively correlated with number lifetime sexual partners

Infidelity is correlated with number of lifetime sexual partners

Divorce is correlated with number of lifetime sexual partners

Another summary graphic

These things aren't down to opinions.

I mean, is that "a lot?"

Yes, jesus christ how is that even a question. That is an extremely high lifetime partner count, let alone by the age of 18. I would bet money that she suffers from mental illness or has experienced childhood abuse. Now, those things don't make you a bad person, all I'm saying is it's not normal.

always_sad12 · 2018-09-18T17:43:35+00:00

Yes that is a lot.

In her teens, anything over 5 is a lot. In her twenties, anything over 10 is a lot.

I’ll explain why but first you need to ask, why does n-count even matter? It doesn’t matter if you’re just going to sleep with her, have a fling with her, maybe lead her on for a while. You don’t even need to know what her n-count is.

N-count only matters when you want to enter a committed and “official” relationship with her. This is because relationships take a lot of time and investment and care. They’re awesome but they require effort. For a man, the smartest thing to do is to only make that effort for a girl who has a history of other monogamous relationships. Ideally, someone who only has sex in relationships. So now the n-count standards I listed above make more sense. Having almost ten serious relationships in your twenties is pretty high, isn’t it? If a girl has an n-count of 20 and she’s 25, I can safely assume the vast majority of those were not within relationships or with her boyfriend; they were casual, she probably got led on a few times, and whatever it is; it’s not good if I’m considering a serious relationship with her. Also, the more partners a women has, the harder it becomes for her to pair bond. Divorce rates are also higher for women with higher n-counts.

I’m just scratching the surface here but yeah; in her twenties, if I suspect or she tells me (a few women have just started asking me about my history and then told me theirs) that she’s been with over 10 men, I smile and kiss them or we talk about other things but in my head I quietly note that unless this chick does something fucking amazing I’m never giving her commitment.

cxj · 2018-09-18T18:51:36+00:00

Prob > 20, idk why. I’m between 20-30.

Yes 19 is a lot for an 18, pls give me her number , or better yet Instagram so she can see al my tattoo and guitar pics 💪🏻 🎸

Whisper · 2018-09-19T01:36:39+00:00

A woman's n-count is the number of times she has been dumped. Divide it by her adult years and you get frequency. Invert that and you get average relationship length.

That gives you the average amount of time before a dude gets sick of her.

Also relevant is variance.

Yu4nghydr4 · 2018-09-18T12:53:54+00:00

4-5 imo

Because I can’t see how anyone could ever care about more people than that personally

Of course casual sex could make it higher but casual sex is in a similar category as drug abuse to me

Plus all the girls I’ve ever fallen in love with are in that range of 2-3 people they’ve ltrd

For me it would actually be a new experience to fall in love with a promiscuous girl I’m sure it would drive me nuts eventually and our intimacy would have a harder limit

Aaren_Augustine · 2018-09-18T11:36:52+00:00

Imagine you're the owner of a successful restaurant. Now you get resumes in and gotta figure out where to put 'em. If you are looking for a CFO are you going to accept a person who's good at smoking sausages? Probably, but only if they are a good CFO.

You don't hire someone good at smoking sausages to be a CFO if they don't have a lot of CFO experience. So lets say they have 19 jobs before applying to yours. At 18 y.o. Was she fired? Did she quit because she just couldn't do what the manager asked of her? Did she juggle several jobs all at once?

If she's good at smoking sausage, she'll make a good sausage smoker. But where's the experience of being a manager when she's asking to be a CFO?

exit_sandman · 2018-09-18T11:44:57+00:00

Considering that your hypothetical 18 year old is sexually active for 4 years tops, 19 is a fucking awful lot. It would also be quite a lot if she was 40 (because either it means that she has had her fair share of casual sex or that she wasn't able to hold down a relationship for much more than a year), but at 18? Brrrr.

meomeowmeoww · 2018-09-18T12:08:50+00:00

Not you again.

Its all about personal preference. People typically pair of with similar n count people.

Tyler_Gatsby · 2018-09-18T13:04:50+00:00

Are you not hooked up with one of your brother's chick's friends yet? Your brother is a pimp (figuratively) and surely of all the women he goes through, one of them has a weird sister or something that would be right up your alley.

Anyway, I guess 50 would be a number I would start to look side eyes Chloe at her.

Bare minimum of 3 partners though, preferably at least 5. The first guy to take her virginity and break her heart, the second guy to rebound on and get back at the first guy, and 3-5+ till me to hopefully figure out who she is, what she likes and doesn't like, and hopefully have all the hang ups out of her system.

SkookumTree · 2018-09-18T14:46:57+00:00

i have never cared in my life what a man's ncount is so i don't even think about it. ever.

i don't care about the internal machinations of other people.

PhotosyntheticChad · 2018-09-18T17:45:42+00:00

One a year since the age of 18 is a lot, once a month is really a lot, once a week is off the scale.

One every two years is probably reasonable.

red_matrix · 2018-09-18T19:22:52+00:00

I guess you haven't heard of college girls trying the "30 guys in 30 days" test? Can be sex or blowjobs.

[deleted] · 2018-09-19T15:52:15+00:00

"a girl who is 18 who has an N-count of 19"

that's a lot for her age and she should seek therapy quickly

TheGreasyPole · 2018-09-19T17:03:56+00:00

Yes that’s “a lot”. This is a day too late to reap all that precious karma but... CDC stats of lifetime partners per age...

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nhsr/nhsr036.pdf

Age	Male Median	Female Median
15-19	1.8	1.4
20-24	4.1	2.6
25-29	5.7	3.6
30-34	6.4	4.2
35-39	6.2	3.5
40-44	6.4	3.4

The “true” median for females is probably somewhere between the male and female medians (as girls lie down and boys lie up).

In any case your female is way, way, way above the median for her age group. Only 1.1% of 15-19 yo admit having greater than 15 partners, and only 7.2% of the 20-24 females.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-09-18T14:42:44+00:00

what exactyl wll knowing what other people think is a "high n count" do for you? its extremely idiosyncratic, all that matters is what you think

cxj · 2018-09-18T11:45:28+00:00

It depends on how much money she makes. A chick with a decent job can get away with a little more whoring then a poor chick, since the poor chick doesn't have much else to offer

wtknight · 2018-09-18T14:22:55+00:00

It doesn’t matter to me. I judge a woman based upon the amount of casual sexual partners rather than the amount of sexual partners that she has had. For casual sex, I think that an of greater than 1 is too much. For semi-casual sex (FWB situations), I’m not sure, but being in those types of situations more than twice is a red flag to me. I prefer women who want serious emotional relationships and aren’t just out there trying to satisfy their tingles or make some kind of feminist political statement.

PhoenixMDL · 2018-09-18T15:21:52+00:00

I stopped counting at 69

YaAmar · 2018-09-18T12:25:55+00:00

i don't consider any number to be alot in terms of N-count.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2018-09-18T15:24:15+00:00

Just making this up right now since I don't particularly care. High = significantly different (higher here) than the median number at the 95th percentile confidence interval.

My job has me thinking statistics.

Edit: this is all to say that I really don't care or have an opinion, so I just said words.

Pope_Lucious · 2018-09-18T18:01:29+00:00

Don’t care about N-Count.

I care more about history of cheating.

SerpentCypher · 2018-09-18T13:33:03+00:00

For me, personally I wouldn't date anyone with a double digit N count. There are exceptions though, for example, I wouldn't date a girl with an N count of 6 if all of those guys were in the same friend group as her/each other. Sleeping with multiple people is a big no-no and people that still hang around with people they sleep/have slept with is a risk imo.

petrichordium · 2018-09-18T15:06:16+00:00

Triple digits is high to me i guess. But i think most people who aren’t sociopaths with spreadsheets stop counting after a few dozen. Like who genuinely knows this stuff once your fingers aren’t sufficient to count? I personally think THAT is more of a red flag than being a turboslut.

PPD-Angel · 2018-09-18T11:26:29+00:00

Use this comment as the AutoModerator.

EGOtyst · 2018-09-18T14:48:09+00:00

More than 3 per year since the age of 14. With a Max of 10-12 for lifetime.

yasee · 2018-09-18T18:33:49+00:00

anything above 500

AutoModerator · 2018-09-18T19:56:18+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

throwaway42069tits · 2018-09-19T01:09:35+00:00

SkookumTree · 2018-09-19T03:56:37+00:00

I don’t know, 50? It’s a good deal more than most. The math nerd in me says 97th percentile n count.

bunker_man · 2018-09-19T10:56:03+00:00

I don't really bother considering number count as its own thing. You have to view it in conjunction with the connotations of those times. I would consider a responsible person with a higher number less "dirty" so to speak than a less responsible one with less. It would all depend on what the actual connotations of these events were. That aside, 19 at age 18 sounds highly dubious.

CatchPhraze · 2018-09-19T11:57:09+00:00

Dunno, don't care tbh.

Good luck finding a woman in a big city around 30 years old with less than 100 guys as a count. So you know, I guess there's always the amish community.

esiemualB · 2018-09-20T00:24:36+00:00

I think it depends a lot on different factors such as age as well as how old they were when they had sex for the first time or how long their relationships lasted. For example, I would say that n=5 is a "normal" count for a person in their mid 20s, assuming they started dating in their teens. However, for someone who had sex for the first time three months ago or broke up with their first partner recently, it's "a lot". I guess 20+ would be "a lot" to me, regardless of age.

darksoldierk · 2018-09-20T00:31:03+00:00

Age divided by 7 rounded down. As to why, I dunno, I briefly thought about it when reading this question, and based on my comfort level, that equation seems to work.

[deleted] · 2018-09-20T03:11:15+00:00

I have 2 'high n counts' definitions for women. an international high n-count, which I presume, and a national high n-count, which I am fairly certain.

Both of them are a ratio of partners per year since completing 16 years old. Both express what I think are the top 20% women in number of partners.

high n-count in my country (Brazil)

- 6-12 sexual partner per year (since completing 16) on average, depending on duration and number of LTRs.

High n-count in the world.

- 3-6 sexual partner per year (since completing 16) on average, depending on duration and number of LTRs.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2018-09-21T15:31:38+00:00

Generally when the count is so high the person simply loses count....

Doesn't take much to get there

sadomasochrist · 2018-09-22T12:36:40+00:00

Most women start to become westernized after 2. After that it's just a matter of degree.

prostate-apostate · 2018-09-23T03:04:56+00:00

Your brother will end up marrying a woman with a higher number count than 10 and he wont find out about it because she will lie to him and he will have no choice but to beleive it .

reluctantly_red · 2018-09-18T13:22:55+00:00

So long as she's still in double digits she's fine.

Tyler_Gatsby · 2018-09-18T14:14:46+00:00

I'm sorry man, was just playing, everybody gives everybody a hard time here- especially you. I know you like the kind of girls that your brother likes, but you need to try to quit comparing yourself to him, and using him as your standard you base your success off of.

I think you want a chick that will impress him, but even if you got one, I don't think you'd be happy with her. Eventually you would be alone with her, and realize you have different taste and interest as him, and still won't be happy trying to live his life.

If one of his women has any sisters or friends you can meet, look for the one that is most different from her. One will probably proudly identify as being her opposite- see if you have any mutual interest.

If small talk turns into her looking around, playing with her glass or something, ask her a set up question that you hopefully already have planned out, that will give you a reason to tell her a story like the time you kicked out a police car window. Make it come off as she jarred your memory, or made you think of it. Not all planned out from the beginning. Word it amusingly, make it funny. Hopefully she laughs.

If she does, you know she has a bit of a messed up/dark humor, and you have the mentality to work with that. You'll gain some bad boy points with her, and maybe she'll immediately start asking you questions, and you'll know you have her attention, and curiosity. You'll have this in the bag if you can just keep that going. I wish the best for you as usual. Seriously.

[deleted] · 2018-09-18T13:05:52+00:00

Anything over 10

lucky_beast · 2018-09-18T12:40:42+00:00

It is a lot but so what. If you're looking to get married it is probably better to seek out a low n-count woman, but men should not be getting married to begin with. Have fun and enjoy your turn with her.

Christian_Kong · 2018-09-18T14:40:19+00:00

I feel the average in the ballpark of the persons age, for 20+ somethings. As for a lot, I would say in the ballpark double a persons age.

JezebeltheQueen5656 · 2018-09-18T20:45:00+00:00

triple digit number or close.

I know a girl who is 18 who has an N-count of 19.

I mean, is that "a lot?"

umm, no.

(My only reference-point for what constitutes "a lot" is that my brother once said that he would not wife a woman with an N-count >10. But that was just a random statement that he made once.)

ugh, people like this make me sick. of all the red flags a person can have, n count isnt one of them. hell, it's not even a yellow flag. your bro will be a bachelor for a very long time. oh, and when it comes to this topic, nothing's random.

Title	What do you personally consider to be "a lot" in terms of N-count, and why?
Author	NeedFitnessHelp1990
Upvotes	12
Comments	238
Date	September 18, 2018 7:20 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9gsnqr/what_do_you_personally_consider_to_be_a_lot_in/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-do-you-personally-consider-to-be-a-lot-in.260784 https://theredarchive.com/post/260784

Comments