Q4W Would you rather LTR a popular fraud or undercover superhero?

cast-away-ramadi06 · 2021-02-04T16:54:47+00:00

[deleted]

LittyKitsune · 2021-02-04T16:49:59+00:00

Undercover superhero

I grew up with parents who were very..."visible" thanks to the nature of their work. It was suffocating, I always felt like I was being watched and people were judging everything I did. The thought of being in an LTR with someone who puts me in that exact situation gives me so much anxiety lol.

NarniaFox · 2021-02-04T16:49:09+00:00

I wanted to ask what the hell is wrong with you, but then I was reminded that there really are people of both genders who would choose the first variant,just because they're obsessed with attention.

Second for me though. I'm not into popularity, I'm really risk-averse and I prefer to date people with similar morals and values, so no frauds for me.

simeneta · 2021-02-04T16:46:05+00:00

The second because I like stability in an LTR

PreparationWorried33 · 2021-02-04T17:56:34+00:00

The undercover superhero. When I hear attractive frauds what comes to mind are men that are community hero’s but secretly pedophiles, philanders or abusers. They make all around terrible partners.

relish5k · 2021-02-04T17:06:02+00:00

Yes I would rather be with Clark Kent than Lex Luther. Obviously.

athrowaway283222 · 2021-02-04T18:17:35+00:00

Undercover superhero by far (actually a bit surprised at the first option, and that people would choose it). I value honesty, the first guy isn't being honest with most people (for what reason idk, popularity and attention?), and I'd prefer the privacy. Plus, I don't want respect and admiration through association, I want people to respect me. I don't like overly popular, showy men. I like humble men who are respected because they show respect and good manners and do well at what they do.

Atlas__B__Shruggin · 2021-02-04T17:10:04+00:00

I could care less about achievements or success and both of these men are no absent any other description. I have no desire to be in the public eye or be with a man who is a normie in any way. I already didnt fuck covert guy because he "dresses plain" whatever gross style that means in your head. im assuming "short hair, hoodie and cargo shorts". 🤢🤮🤢

my choice here would be "pick up that homeless blonde guy with a dog by the Franklin mills mall" or "get more cats"

_mwk · 2021-02-04T18:21:55+00:00

neither of them omg

i don't want to be in the spotlight 24/7 bc anxiety inducing but I don't want to be with an intelligence agent bc anxiety inducing and i want and need a social life

Kandace21 · 2021-02-04T18:27:15+00:00

There is less competition and more privacy with the undercover superhero. Besides fraud guy could get exposed someday and take you down with him.

PrincessFKNPeach · 2021-02-04T21:11:07+00:00

Do you realize the first one sounds like a fuckboy?

crookedsummer2019 · 2021-02-04T21:13:38+00:00

The secret super hero. Frauds are frauds with everyone. I wouldn’t trust him.

rft24 · 2021-02-04T18:21:23+00:00

i’d choose the undercover hero.

i like the strong and silent type. i’m not really into the idea of being a very well known individual or being attached to someone who is, and i want stability. sure it’s not exciting, but i don’t care for exciting. i care to be safe.

plus, i’d rather be with an introvert who’s overly humble over an person who’s fame is built on fraud and knows it. i just can’t respect that.

Demasii · 2021-02-04T18:53:48+00:00

When a man that you are with is attractive and admired at that level, you are going to attract negative attention to yourself if you are not up to par.

ItWasBrokenAlready · 2021-02-04T19:32:00+00:00

Is it a cool & heisty fraud or pathetic fraud? Like we're pair of immortal shapeshifter who stole popular people's bodies, or is it like he's a fake and lousy Superhero like this speedy guy from The Boys?

octocombo · 2021-02-04T20:25:37+00:00

Assuming both are attractive and crazy about you, which one would you actually picture yourself building a life with?

Neither. These would both be terrible partners for me.

I don’t want to be with someone who is famous because I like privacy, and I also don’t want to be with someone dishonest. I don’t think I could respect that. So I can’t imagine building a life with option 1; I would walk away from this.

But there’s a lot of middle ground between being famous and having your existence be a secret. I live in a community, and it’s important to me to be open and honest with the people I care about. If I can’t share my life with family and friends, get their feedback and advice, and maybe even I am not allowed to know what my partner does? That would be incredibly frustrating to me. If I wasn’t allowed to know, I would have difficulty feeling close to my partner because I would know he was keeping so much from me and not getting my input on a major part of his life. If I was allowed to know but had to keep secrets from my family and friends, I would feel torn away from them. It’s a dealbreaker for me if my partner repeatedly/chronically creates situations where I have to choose between my partner and my family. And I assume a superhero would often prioritize saving the city etc. over keeping plans with me (even if they were crazy about me), which is understandable, but flakiness isn’t a feature I would want in a partner. So I can’t imagine building a life with option 2, either.

The ideal partner is quite successful but not successful enough that this fame/secrecy dichotomy becomes an issue. A scientist who’s a tenured professor but not well-known outside their specific field, a head engineer at a major company, a mechanic who owns their own small business...but I’d rather have a partner who was less professionally successful than this ideal (e.g., adjunct lecturer, grunt engineer, librarian, barista) than have a partner like either the undercover superhero or the fraud. Honestly, I think I’d rather be single than be with either the undercover superhero or the fraud.

I won’t lie and say professional status is irrelevant to me, but the ideal status level is ~top 10% to top 0.5%, and my dateable range is roughly the 45th percentile to the 99.75th percentile. Below the 45th percentile OR above the 99.75th percentile would both make me uncomfortable in the relationship.

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-02-04T21:33:16+00:00

If I have to choose, the second one. But honestly, both sound like a bit of a hot mess.

cuddlemechloe · 2021-02-04T21:33:19+00:00

The non-liar obviously.

Also, is fame really that coveted? I think a lot of ppl think they want fame, but they actually want money. Fame is just a really visible way to get money, and so people think it's the easiest way. It seems like the shittiest way to be rich though.

alwaysonalongtrip · 2021-02-04T21:40:17+00:00

I’d rather stay single and keep looking

cloudsongs_ · 2021-02-05T04:36:58+00:00

Undercover superhero. The first one is dishonest.

Edit: I am choosing this on the assumption that the second man is being honest with me about his life.

iloveyoubutyou · 2021-02-04T16:51:59+00:00

Undercover superhero.

rosyandthemachine · 2021-02-04T16:54:44+00:00

neither.

first off, option 2 is ALSO a fraud. i don't want to be with someone who is so insecure and losery that they hide their greatness. be great. also if you are ACTUALLY great and successful, its obvious.

secondly, someone who has garnered respect and admiration from others is NOT fraud unless they are actually lying about their gains. i think imposter syndrome is a normal thing for those who earned a lot later in life and didn't grow up with much.

assuming both are attractive and crazy about me....hmm...

option 1. i'll tell you why.

I don't believe in false humility. If you awesome, then share that with the world.
If everyone respects you, then I also share that respect by being CHOSEN by you. so it ups my standing as well. i care about community respect. it has nothing to do with money.
I like unpredictable rollercoasters. It excites me. Its why I'm with my husband.

MBBchick · 2021-02-04T16:56:08+00:00

I'd rather LTR the popular fraud assuming he's crazy about me and hot. I don't really see why I would want a man other men didn't respect socially.

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IcarusKiki · 2021-02-04T19:51:45+00:00

Superhero duh

Reisiluu · 2021-02-04T21:26:59+00:00

The undercover superhero. For example a guy who made his sister's rapist disappear would be more attractive than a show wrestler.

Alarmed-HamsterSpins · 2021-02-04T21:42:45+00:00

How is the fraud a fraud? Is he a fraud or we have a good likelihood of losing everything and his reputation being tarnished and us becoming social pariah? You have to explain more about the negative side of the fraud

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-02-04T22:00:58+00:00

I don't even understand what you're asking really. The latter is just a regular man with a job and the former is some kind of Trump personality. For some reason this question scrambles my brain.

goatismycopilot · 2021-02-04T23:27:30+00:00

Neither.

Nation_of_Two · 2021-02-05T01:26:59+00:00

Everyone is going to answer they want the real hero and not the fraud. I am not sure why you would tell us "be honest, no bullshit" as if we would lie about such a thing. Do you really expect women to want a narcissist or a fake?

goneaway2thewind · 2021-02-05T03:48:17+00:00

[removed]

GGMcThroway · 2021-02-05T06:49:42+00:00

Do I have the option of being completely out of the public myself? Are we talking about unrealistically ideal scenarios here?

Provided that Mr. Fraud isn't actually an asshole and let's me access all that (assumedly MASSIVE) wealth, I'd ride the philanthropy train hard and do what I can to make the world a better place for everyone (or at least facilitate the means to do so for as many people as possible). We'd probably wind up being like business partners and he can have as many side honeys as he wants as long as he lets me do my work in peace and doesn't doesn't screw me over. 🤷‍♀️

If you mean only thinking as a romantic partner, obviously the covert dude. I don't want to be in the public eye in the first place. If who I'm with doesn't change how much I can do for the world, I'd rather have the less visible life. Plus, the idea of having a special treasure (like a super bf) all to myself is pretty tantalizing ngl.

I'd be happier with the covert dude, but the world matters more than my happiness if I have the power to change it for the better.

theterriblebelt · 2021-02-05T07:14:54+00:00

Undercover superhero. It’s kind of telling in my own life: I fell for (and probably still am) head-over-heels over a dude that’s considered nerdy, pretty awkward and ‘conventionally unattractive’ in his physical features. But I was super attracted by his intelligence, talent for music and videogames, the fact we make each other laugh, etc. I’m basically the only female attention he’s ever gotten and when I started coming onto him, I got a lot of comments from his friends/other guys that thought my standards were too low and that I could “do better”.

...It turns out he’s aromantic but that doesn’t stop me from simping over him LMAO ✊😔

ReasonableWealth · 2021-02-05T07:33:08+00:00

Most women will say they want the undercover guy and yeah maybe they do, but many lack the skills to spot the type of guy that is covertly successful. If they come upon this man in real life, majority of women won't pay him any attention because they think he does't have his shit together.

Whereas the popular fraud will have more success with women because women mostly just look at the superficials in order to judge the character of a man. However this will be tricky for a LTR though she may not want her cover to be blown so she may choose the covert guy, but then attempt to influence him to spend more money and become more flashy so it raises her perceived value.

nemporisso · 2021-02-05T07:51:14+00:00

The spy. There's nothing less attractive than a fraud.

mindsanitizer · 2021-02-07T22:43:53+00:00

In real life the fraud guy is literally drowning in pussy.

Title	Q4W Would you rather LTR a popular fraud or undercover superhero?
Author	goneaway2thewind
Upvotes	5
Comments	81
Date	February 4, 2021 4:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/lcjoac/q4w_would_you_rather_ltr_a_popular_fraud_or/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-would-you-rather-ltr-a-popular-fraud-or.738273 https://theredarchive.com/post/738273

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