As a 34 year old woman with some experience, I've met more families than I wish I have while dating and none of those were families I wanted to be a part of.

Here are some tips from me for facing this even that can cause so much stress and anxiety:

1 . ALWAYS overdress. - You want to be remembered as “that classy lady that dumped him”, not “that frumpy girl he brought one time”.

  1. Shut up, smile and LISTEN: Those are the people who know him best. Some of the most valuable information you could possibly come across will come from his own family. Most of them can't wait to air out his dirty laundry or jokingly throw him under the buss in front of the new girl. Keep your eyes and ears sharp, this is an invaluable part of vetting, I can NOT stress this enough!

  2. They're not vetting you, you're vetting them. Look around, listen carefully and think very carefully: Is this a family you want to be a part of?

  3. Remember: you're the VIP – a member of the family brought in a potential life partner. They should be on their best behavior and give you a "royal treatment". (Hopefully better than Meghan...)

If they can't keep it together for a special occasion, just think what a disaster they must be on a daily basis.

  1. Stay tuned for signs of casual racism, homophobia, xenophobia, misogyny and political bs word salads and jokes meant to provoke you.

  2. If you're family orientated: be mindful how the children behave. IF they behave. What they can get away with. Who takes care of them – This could very well be your future.

  3. Be extremely mindful how they treat their pets. (Make no mistake, you're two or three steps behind the pets. (The broken coffee machine is more important than you at this point.).

  4. Small talk before big talk. Give as little information about you as possible and keep it extremely vague. Just remember, everything you say may and will be used against you. Try to separate the nosy ones from those who genuinely want to get to know you and behave benevolently towards you.

  5. Always be yourself! You want those who like you to like you for yourself. And you want those who don't you to dislike you for the same reason. It simplifies things a lot in the long run.

  6. When in doubt – always go back to your manners. You're a guest and you can never be faulted if you behave as just that – a guest, in a stranger's house. If something goes wrong, it's best to stay reserved, keep your dignity and leave quietly.

  7. NEVER, EVER, under ANY circumstances do you put your hand in your pocket to pay for anything related to meeting the family. I don't care if they live down the street or if they're on a different continent, half a world away, or a different galaxy.

Also, it should go without saying, always have enough money to go back home safely on your own.

  1. On a different note - if YOU feel reluctant to bring someone home, introduce them to your friends or family – that's a big, fat, red flag. There's a good reason for it. Trust yourself.