My wife has only recently returned to work after 7 years as a full time house wife. I owned a house before meeting my wife and have held a full time job the whole time. I work 40 hrs a week and make $120k a year. My wife works 15 hrs a week and warms $20k a year.

I love my wife but she is often quite critical of me in front of our 2 daughters (5 & 8 yrs). She will often tell me that I spend to much or don't do enough to help her. She makes all the meals and takes the kids to school. She also does the bulk of the inside house work.

Tonight we had my Aunt over for dinner. Both my daughters decided to inform my aunt what a terrible husband I was with the following accusations: "he spends all the time on the computer, mum makes all the meals and takes us to school, he treats her like his slave." My aunt then replied: "but your dad goes to work and earns money to pay the bills". To which both daughters quickly responded: "mum works to so that's no excuse." I feel hurt and embarrassed and wonder whether my family even appreciate the fact that I hand every cent I earn to their mother, never buy lunch or coffees, don't drive a car and catch public transport so my wife can work such mimimal hours.

I work 3 times as long and earn 6 times as much. I don't think this counts for anything - if they left me the law would require I continue to earn am pay.

My question is this: my wife refuses to work longer or seek a better paid job and this puts pressure on me to earn more, yet my hard work is not appreciated. I feel like slitting my wrists. What should I do?

EDIT @ 1700 AUSTRALIAN TIME:

Thank you everyone for the kind and wise advise. A lot of food for thought.

I spoke to my wife soon after posting this message. She was very apologetic and compassionate. She acknowledged she should avoid being critical of me in front of the kids and that she should have been the one jumping to my defence.

I spoke to my daughters as well. As well the accusations in the above post our daughter oldest accused me of acting like a 5 year old at the shops. When ever we go shopping I'm keen to get home after an hour or so and usually say if you want to shop for hours don't take me with you. There was a litany of other accusations: I drink to much wine, I spend to much on cameras (all things my wife has accused me of in front of the kids). I told them I was hurt and dissapointed by their disloyalty. When they appeared bored by this I told them that I worked hard to provide them things and to allow their mother the luxury of staying home. I felt emotional and said there will be no Christmas presents this year. I assured that I loved them but that until they appreciated the sacrifices I made I would not be buying them anything nice.

I know I probably went too far. I will speak to them when I get home ftom work (I am on the train home as I type this).

All of my salary goes into a joint account. My wife pays the utility bills from this account. She is a good money manager but is very strict with expenditure, and gets very negative if I make too many withdrawals.

My fear is that as my daughters get older their contempt for me will grow and I will just be an unappreciated cash machine. The advice that I should spend more time doing chores around the house and more time with them is probably wise. I do some chores and other than Friday evening after work drinks I spend all my time at home outside work.

My concern is that my wife's negative language coupled with the male bashing femininist narrative is an unbeatable duo.

My wife has agreed to stop being negative about me in front of the kids. This is a start.