Why? Just why?

povofme · 2021-09-15T04:24:16+00:00

Probably trying to make women jealous so she over competes and performs during sex to try and be better than his ex.

sexualfoodpantry · 2021-09-15T04:42:03+00:00

It's a deal breaker for this reason alone: if you ever get in bed, he'll tell the next woman about you in great detail, too.

But don't count on him telling just one person. Those kind men tend to tell everyone including their relatives.

Inevitable_Molasses · 2021-09-15T03:43:52+00:00

Because if THEY think it’s hot, of course you will too. It’s the verbal equivalent of a dick pic

PetuniaXo · 2021-09-15T03:13:44+00:00

Ugh. This has happened to me before. When I was doing Online Dating, a guy told me about all the things women did with him on or before the first date. He would slide it into the conversations in the most subtle ways and make it sound like they were just so eager to sleep with him and he keeps meeting girls who just want sex. I should have cut him off right then, but I eventually cut him off because I could tell he was losing interest after the 3rd date with no sex. LOL talk about projection. HE was the one who seemed to just want sex. Even if the girls were eager or pick mes I'm sure he was pushy....or at the very least, he was a participant.

In my case, and probably in a lot of cases, it seems to be a subtle pressure tactic. They are trying to let you know what they're used to, and therefore, what they expect out of you. Unfortunately for him, I have a mind of my own. I'm not immune to manipulation but I'm not easy to manipulate (anymore).

Other times it's just trashy tmi behavior. Either way it's low value.

pickmieshaexorcist · 2021-09-15T02:59:04+00:00

Any man that tries to get sexual with you over text is disrespectful and needs instant block and delete. Talking about the ex on top of that is just an extra heaping layer of disrespect.

sweetnsaltyanxiety · 2021-09-15T12:09:06+00:00

I dated a guy briefly once that not only started telling me detailed stories about his prior sex life, but proceeded to pull his phone out and show me a half naked picture of his ex gf that he clearly took without her knowledge. Never went out with him again.

rinohopp · 2021-09-15T03:13:13+00:00

I was made to think this was normal, I know see it’s very disrespectful an just unnecessary.

Once I asked my bf at the time about his sexual past and just if he’s been safe and tested, as any reasonable person but it transitioned to a full blown description of sexual acts. Never again.

WHY DO THEY DO THAT??

arnezuara · 2021-09-15T04:40:12+00:00

I am here to say that you do need to know his sexual history (let him “brag”, then block, like OP did).

If he’s a community dick, he’ll cheat; so, it’s best you know early rather than find out later. Some men are not stupid: they know what to and not to talk about. You need to want him (for your own good) to tell on himself as early as possible.

ItsFreezen · 2021-09-15T12:11:00+00:00

Because they get off on triangulating you.

Sallou9 · 2021-09-15T14:55:51+00:00

Try being a gay woman. For some reason, the minute I tell them, or they are told, they switch the convo to sex immediately and start asking me really personal sex questions, or talking about their sex life in a really disgusting way.
Its like my sexuality is an invitation

putequitue · 2021-09-15T05:32:01+00:00

It’s like some kind of pickme test. They want to see how low we’ll go for that precious male approval. I once had a first date go on and on about how much he liked threesomes. I just said, “Well, you haven’t even managed to get me into bed yet. And now, you never will!” He was one of my brother’s best friends too. Just so ick.

thyroidcrp · 2021-09-15T17:14:09+00:00

It’s a tactic from that stupid male dating handbook. They believe by giving you details of what “freaks” the exes were that you’ll go above and beyond to please them in the bedroom. It’s laughable. I told one guy “that’s nice she sounds amazing I think you should go back.” He looked at me like I had a screw loose.

Ironsculpture · 2021-09-15T10:43:54+00:00

I like men who are socially inept. They're easy to figure out and block.

_RustInPiece_ · 2021-09-15T09:33:49+00:00

Negging. They think they are setting the pace, that they can get you to chase them for approval. They test you for kinkmeishas/open-minded/cool girl tendencies.

Cotton1candy · 2021-09-15T05:58:31+00:00

Ew. Ive had a man message me screenshots of porn he was watching

Suspicious_Bad_5178 · 2021-09-15T11:23:46+00:00

LOL in my pickme days I had one guy do this to me - and then proceed to not being able to perform when we tried to have sex. Not my proudest moment but wow I wish I could sue him for false advertisement.

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2021-09-15T04:54:53+00:00

Someone who brings up sex before we are actually having it is a red flag and a block and delete.

InayahDaneen · 2021-09-15T18:43:16+00:00

I always found it disgusting and unattractive when a male went into details about his sexual past. All I would think about was this guy being a walking STD Petri dish, a hazard to women’s health. I personally prefer mēn with little to no experience in this dept, also without any porn baggage clogging his brain.

CaliforniaKed · 2021-09-15T08:55:47+00:00

Because that’s how they talk to their friends about women and every once in a while they slip and forget we’re not one of their bros.

electroloop · 2021-09-15T18:05:21+00:00

If they’re talking about other women and their past sexual conquests to you, they will talking about you to other people.

Good for you for blocking them! 9 times out of 10 men will make up stories about their sexual conquests to appear more desirable to women (funny that’s how their brain works). And if their stories were true, do you really think a HVW will be blown away and thrilled at the fact he had a drunken night in Tijuana and fisted 3 midget prostitutes?

dr_mcstuffins · 2021-09-15T15:13:52+00:00

It’s triangulation

MovieTheaterPopcornn · 2021-09-15T14:31:41+00:00

My friend’s husband does this. We’d all be out for a nice dinner and he had no problem bringing up girls from the past and what they did together…meanwhile we’re just trying to enjoy our dinner. My friend would roll her eyes. However, she would also bring up her past to make him jealous (totally healthy relationship 🙄) and he would shut her down immediately and say he didn’t want to hear it because it made him sick.

enigmatic138 · 2021-09-15T16:04:51+00:00

That was exactly the last guy I was dating. This man bragged and boasted up and down about his sexual history and just “how eager” women were to sleep with him. Sometimes, he’d even go into specifics about what and how he did things.

In retrospect, I should have left / blocked the moment he started with his stupidity (I’m the one to blame there), but like others have mentioned, it’s a tactic to pressure you, boost their ego and pry at any insecurities you may have (even if it’s all lies or made-up situations on their part).

It’s disgusting what men are capable of, but I’m not surprised at this point. 😒

Japanese-Spaghetti · 2021-09-15T14:39:27+00:00

I remember a few girlfriends telling me in the past that they would never date a guy who was a virgin. And I’m like what???? You would rather date a man who had kids outside of wedlock or has some STDs? The emphasis on “sexual experience” in relationships nowadays is really weird and doesn’t make any sense to me

radbabe420 · 2021-09-15T03:13:11+00:00

Wait, just so I understand this…he talked about what he and his ex did sexually with each other? Yikes

Shot_Presence_8382 · 2021-09-16T00:15:53+00:00

Ew, when guys do that, or talk about exes at all, such as LVX husband would mention his ex shaved EVERYTHING and was hairless and she was from California, on and on, it instantly turns me OFF. If he's talking about sex with other women, what she used to do, what she did that he liked, anything... I won't be interested anymore. Just makes me think, why don't you go back to her, then, if you thought she was perfect for you? Why are you talking to me about your previous sex life?! 😒

losersquad711 · 2021-09-15T22:59:19+00:00

he’s trying to set the bar so you feel like you have to do all that and then some. no thanks sweetheart, go back to her if you want to still bring her up.

yareelcom · 2021-09-15T14:31:02+00:00

I think it depends on the man.

Many men find it hard to talk about their desires, and they tell stories about how it was with their exes. Perhaps you should draw some conclusions for yourself ( their opinions).

Title	Why? Just why?
Author	ndf250
Upvotes	593
Comments	54
Date	September 15, 2021 2:51 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pohjny/why_just_why/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/why-just-why.1070373 https://theredarchive.com/post/1070373

Comments