I think what feminism broke is ability for both sides to contribute something to make a relationship work, not just transactionally but in terms of the romance itself. Nowadays, men have to be both seductive and chivalrous, while women also became more immune to both things. It used to be that women were seductive and men were chivalrous.
What is seduction? Make the other party interested in you emotionally.
What is chivalry? A combination of strength and politeness.
How does this actually look in practice? The man is polite, strong, and aloof. The woman blushes, demonstrates emotional interest, and acts something out from instinct that is inherently seductive to the man. The man, seeing this interest, plans something so that they can spend more time together, after which time maybe they grow more together, or maybe they don't.
I think modern mating practices are breaking down in part because it asks the man to be seductive, and then it asks the woman to follow the seduction. This often doesn't work both because men are worse seducers and women are worse followers of said seduction. Women want to be in control of the emotional content/level of the interaction, and the man trying to seduce her is actually stripping that from her.
There are many other factors that contribute to problems overall, but I wanted to follow this principle all the way through. One closely related factor is that the hypergamous nature of women and the zero sum nature of college and career success between men and women has resulted in far less men who are attractive to women at the exact same time that we are putting more pressure on men to be attractive to women and also taking pressure away from women to work on being attractive (not just visually, but behaviorally) to men.
I think this mismatch explains a decent portion of the increased rates of singledom.
[–]TankfarmMurdock 27 points28 points29 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Crazy_Kray 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TankfarmMurdock 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 17 points18 points19 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[+]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -7 points-6 points-5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay1994OG red pilled woman 12 points13 points14 points (24 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (23 children) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay1994OG red pilled woman 8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 4 points5 points6 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]TankfarmMurdock 9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TylikcatPeople before pills - woman 5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheBroke1234Personality Pilled Man 1 point2 points3 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay1994OG red pilled woman 4 points5 points6 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]TylikcatPeople before pills - woman 4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay1994OG red pilled woman 4 points5 points6 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay1994OG red pilled woman 4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]KayRay19943 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheBroke1234Personality Pilled Man 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bondepartOG Red Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]EugeneCezanneBlue Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]soulangelicno pill woman 12 points13 points14 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]soulangelicno pill woman 6 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]soulangelicno pill woman 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloudRed Pill Woman 25 points26 points27 points (33 children) | Copy Link
[+]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -6 points-5 points-4 points (32 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloudRed Pill Woman 23 points24 points25 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]YupperdoodledooBlue Pill Woman 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -8 points-7 points-6 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloudRed Pill Woman 14 points15 points16 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloudRed Pill Woman 20 points21 points22 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloudRed Pill Woman 15 points16 points17 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]chamomilecloud6 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat1231 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TylikcatPeople before pills - woman 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]YupperdoodledooBlue Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]turkish_gold 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 10 points11 points12 points (16 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (15 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 8 points9 points10 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 1 point2 points3 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 6 points7 points8 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA♀️ My husband takes out the trash🗑 9 points10 points11 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA6 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat1230 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA7 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat1231 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA6 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat1230 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ThatBitchA5 points [recovered] | Copy Link
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[–]ThatBitchA3 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]PB-French-Toast-9641 22 points23 points24 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]DankuTwo 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]emmarie1023No Pill Woman 6 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 6 points7 points8 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 4 points5 points6 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 6 points7 points8 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]BarneysparkyNo Pill woman 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]pie-martNo Pill woman 3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]turkish_gold 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Routine-Present-3676Blue Pill Woman 6 points7 points8 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]Routine-Present-3676Blue Pill Woman 4 points5 points6 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Routine-Present-3676Blue Pill Woman 5 points6 points7 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Routine-Present-3676Blue Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 13 points14 points15 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Alarmed-Telephone-83Blue Pill Man 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -7 points-6 points-5 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 7 points8 points9 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Lift_and_LurkMan: all pills are dumb 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bluestjuicePeople are wrong on the internet! 6 points7 points8 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]bluestjuicePeople are wrong on the internet! 3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]bluestjuicePeople are wrong on the internet! 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Pristine_Cost_3793No Pill Woman 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PositionStandard6089no pill woman 4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]RoyalGovernment3034Blue Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CissyXSPurple Pill Woman 3 points4 points5 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]CissyXSPurple Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]NotAllTheCakeEmpty Gel Capsule Pilled Woman 9 points10 points11 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -5 points-4 points-3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]HungryDepth5918Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AmandaPeaPink Pill Woman 2 points3 points4 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]AmandaPeaPink Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]turkish_gold 3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Feeling_Ad_1034Purple Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PuzzleheadedRow9896Purple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]PuzzleheadedRow9896Purple Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TylikcatPeople before pills - woman 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]IcyTrapeziumPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]IcyTrapeziumPurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]esdebahBlue Pill Man 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]PromiscuousVillain [score hidden] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]esdebahBlue Pill Man [score hidden] (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Newduuud2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MarioWilson122Red Pill Man 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Secret_Entry1840Pill Of One Woman (sometimes jaded sometimes hopeful) 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Outside_Memory5703 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]YupperdoodledooBlue Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bondepartOG Red Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lysa_Bellpost wall ghost 👻♀️ 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheColdWomanPurple Pill Woman 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]PromiscuousVillain [score hidden] (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Steve77307Man 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]myboobiezarequitebig [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]LiftSleepRepeat123Consequentialist Pill Man[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link