Has your views changed since learning game

SnooHesitations4922 · 2024-09-10T09:17:15+00:00

Learning game comes with a toll.

Once I realized what actually works, it's like a wake up to how sick and dark reality actually is

MrAnonPoster · 2024-09-10T11:49:00+00:00

You are incompatible with most women you have sex with in day to day life. It is normal.

Dandys3107 · 2024-09-10T10:43:38+00:00

Obviously learning seduction casted some bitter shadows on reality of attraction and women's nature. All those fairy tales about love or whatever that was imputed by mothers, teachers, society turned out to be just a wishful dream or sneaky agenda. But still, beneath it you can find just straightforward laws of nature, which we should embrace and learn how to handle to our own possible extent.

Btw, in your case I think you should consider maybe slowing things down a little bit, creating deeper connection, getting involved in each other's lives if you want to form some serious relation. If all your interactions are about escalating game, it's no surprise than girl can only view this in sexual context.

hunterpua · 2024-09-10T11:01:04+00:00

I’ve had more successes having casual sex than forming a relationship.

This is common for dating in general.

The vast majority of people you meet regardless of whether it be through dating apps, introductions, colleagues, cold approach, etc are just gonna be people you're involved with for a bit but it doesn't work out long term.

That's what makes women who are wife material special.

My views on dating since learning game have mostly changed for the better. I've basically lost all of my naivete and lost all the behaviours of inexperienced men like assuming character based on women who have a particular look.

You know the type. The ones who look "innocent" or "pure" or just the ones who are so beautiful they 'have' to be great people deep inside. 🤦‍♂️

I also started out very aggressive about going for women I was physically attracted to and borderline part of the "Direct game only because it's the only way to be 'authentic' " echochamber but learned that's actually kinda pathetic and that Indirect can actually be much more authentic and dignified.

In fact I believe "Direct" and "Indirect" are misnomers that came about simply through oversimplification.

You see, once you get to a point where you know you can get the girls you want and you know you can find meaningful relationships (which I have found way more through cold approach than anything else), you become much much more selective, to the point that a woman's looks simply won't cut it, no matter how hot she is.

When you're at that point, approaching someone and telling them you had to meet them because they're gorgeous or whatever is the most * INAUTHENTIC thing you can do.

Which is why now I approach "indirect" and actually Qualify women, which is something 99.9% of guys who learn game grossly neglect, probably because by its nature, it can actually get in the way of you sleeping with someone and that bothers guys who only care about getting their dick wet.

Qualification is what makes the difference between an Indirect Approach that's just you pretending and one that's actually authentic.

If you're gonna pretend to not be interested in her only to try to fuck her no matter what then of course that's deceptive and sleazy.

But if you're just making conversation with her because you think she has some potential and you're just giving her a chance, while also actively Qualifying her to test if she would actually be a good fit and actually deciding whether you want to progress things with her or not based on how well or how badly she does on you qualifying her then that's extremely authentic.

Guys who have options have the luxury of being selective and taking an approach that's much more selective in nature simply aligns with that much better.

Oh and to touch on your concern again. You likely haven't gotten as good as you can yet if the only girls who don't reject you are the ones who want something casual.

The stuff I wrote above is based on 15 years of game. And at this point, Game (including Social Circle game) is by far the best thing I've done to find meaningful relationships.

In fact, I've been in one for the past 5 years and its so noticeabley awesome that when we're hanging out with a group, a lot of times people, including other couples, comment on it and are sometimes surprised about how good things are between us.

genericriffs · 2024-09-10T14:03:41+00:00

It absolutely shattered my worldview way back when. When you realized you have been lied to to such an extreme extent you question everything

RockemSockemDoggyDog · 2024-09-10T22:32:59+00:00

Greatly changed from many angles. I'm still relatively new to game, but I learned a lot and it has made me feel sad about the reality of women's behavior and what they respond to, and my hope of what I can do as a father if I ever have a daughter.

1) Looks and conventional attractiveness makes everything so easy. I have friends who are like this...they have no game, but girls either approach them or when they approach they just have to do a few sentence exchange to get them to their place. Whereas I have to invest a ton of time in learning game and self-improvement just to get a fraction of their results. That's a lot of time they get to level up in their careers, etc.

2) Being a feminist is not attractive. The men I know above are the least feminist I know. They think of women no different than a child to be taken care of. My entire life I was convinced of being nice, respectful, a less genderless world....but that's not what attracts at all. What attracts is much more masculine and dominant...and treating women like they're not hot shit. I'm a feminist is in that equality is important, but to say gender roles in dating don't play a huge part is delusional, at present at least.

3) Can't take women seriously. This was a big revelation. After seeing all the BS excuses, flaking, saying "I'm too busy to go on dates" but run across them with other guys, having amazing conversations but then not being interested, etc.....women who're attracted to you will move heaven and earth to be with you. Otherwise, it's just politeness.

4) Women will lie to themselves if they're attracted to you, and lie to you if they aren't. I learned to follow a woman's actions rather than their words because they think *emotionally*, not logically. Whatever they say is just *one* small signal of many in communication. If a woman is attracted to you, they'll justify whatever red-flag to be with you...."too old? No, age gap is prob okay", "too poor? No, he's prob on his way to becoming ambitious", "I have work at 6AM tomorrow, but that important morning presentation will go fine...", ...etc. But, if they aren't attracted to you...."I'm too busy", "I have a boyfriend", etc etc.

5) Women control sex, men control relationships/emotional intimacy. Another big learning for me. Post-feminism, we can no longer "slut shame"...I do think shaming is bad. But, also, having women give away sex when they feel the man has connected with them, and having the man give away vulnerability/time in order to have sex provides for a "balanced" society. But, that's all broken now. Women are more promiscuous then ever and often going for the best looking guys. If they are giving away sex so easily, then why should I readily be treating them as if a relationship is in the bag? The best strategy for me is to go for sex/escalate and let the woman handle asking for the relationship. It's important that I don't think about relationships unless I think the woman has potential to be my wife.

6) Women who have a history of casual sex are for dating, women who do it through relationships are for marriage. This isn't a hard boundary, but having seen what the world is like it makes me think "Why should a woman who sleeps around deserve all that I worked and built for to be me, all my emotional vulnerability and work to build a relationship and have intimacy with her, when she gave it away readily to guys who didn't need to do that to attract her?" This thought came when I saw how readily they'll sleep with a guy out of exploration or attraction...but then I have to work so hard to get the same result.

(Cont'd below comment)

97Bo-Red13 · 2024-09-10T16:12:23+00:00

Its a shit show. Dont get married

Eyitsyaboii · 2024-09-10T09:28:17+00:00

Well on the other hand, imagine you commit to someone and then find out they are bad in bed.

norwegiandoggo · 2024-09-10T09:19:15+00:00

Why is it sad? Sex is great and you also get a relationship if you want to. Win win. You can look at anything with a glass half full or half empty mindset. It's up to you

Seductive_allure3000 · 2024-09-10T11:37:04+00:00

. Women aren’t as complicated or mean as Men make them out to be

. Women pay more attention to your vibe and tonality than what you’re actually saying.

. Women are a lot hornier than Men

. Being authentic and direct with your intentions will get you far with Women

. It’s okay to feel nervous, she feels nervous too. Own it.

Eezay · 2024-09-10T12:11:54+00:00

Not in the same way as you - I have no problem getting physical fast and I haven't had that even before I started entering the rabbit hole.

For me it's more that I've become extremely critical of monogamous relationships from all the shit I've experienced and observed since learning game. I'm kinda accepting right now that this 'fairytale' you speak of, I will probably never find, and at this point I'm even wondering if I actually want to find it at all. Most relationships have a relatively short fuse after which they start turning to shit and you take months to get out of it and then months rebuilding yourself. And of course a relationship takes a lot of work, but the work is required by two people, and honestly I feel like most people nowadays are just not willing anymore to put in that work.

It's when you realize that most guys you talk to complain about literally the same shit after a while in every relationship. And when you realize that seemingly 4 out of 5 of people in a relationship over 4 years have literal disdain for their partner and are sexually frustrated. Or when most married men tell you to never marry. I mean, I understand where most of these problems come from, but I still don't want to deal with them.

Wing_Inevitable · 2024-09-10T14:07:20+00:00

Has your views changed since learning game

I was very young when I started so Yes.

I can even point out some stuff for you.

Niceness - I was a very nice kid (ask my dad he still bitches about it). Polite, loving , cared about other’s feelings - and that went away quickly.

Love - I did believe love was unconditional - well that doesn’t exist. You either fulfil the conditions or you mean nothing.

Women in general - my family is mostly women strong serious women (the actual meanings of those words - not this modern “slay queen” stuff) well most are just losers acting like they are the shit (cuz that is what they want). Also 90% of them are immature as fuck.

Women having personalities - At some point you realise no one is special and even if they look like it - they are still replaceable.

Women DON’T know shit about what they want. I have a massive example coming up in a post, but listening to women is a death sentence. Any advice a woman has given me has been either flat out wrong or filtered in a way that wasn’t helpful.

Romance - this one kills me to this day. It doesn’t exist. It is all based on sexuality (read something on sexual tension)

Women reject men - turns out no 90% of rejections are self imposed. Hell they give you soooo many chances it is fucking unreal. (You will start to see this when you flat out mess up and then say “sorry” (in a particular way) and as if nothing happened).

Male personality is judged on how Narcissistic,loud, cocky and certain in what you are saying you are.

Connecting with a woman is a sin. That only makes you one of the girls. They don’t care. You are either fuck able or not.

Women think in emotion. Facts and emotions are two different things.

All women hate weakness. Some more some less, some understand you are human and tolerate it . But to one extend to another.

I actually started understanding the pump and dump mentality - You can’t be “That guy” in a relationship. It is next to impossible to actually care about someone and act the way you should.

Never take a woman seriously . You just realise they mostly talk bullshit for no reason/social competitiveness. They don’t want it too. (Where the whole “actions don’t have consequences” mentality comes from)

Relationships don’t really exist. As a man that grew up watching Disney movies - “We were sold a lie and bought it hook line and sinker. “

Society is made in a way to fuck you - generally the more you know about women - the more society seems to be made by losers that have never had sex. The funnily thing (if you think about it a bit) is that anything that works with women is anti-societal behaviour ( The whole modern day - criminal debacle as an example)

The internet is full of idiots - There has been a hand full of time I have read something on the internet and it was actually true or said in full.

Cold approach -> escalate to sex -> potentially start dating

This is actually one of the things I hate the most. But sadly it is the way things work.

I will spoil the fun of figuring this part out - relationships are build by having sex multiple times . Aka if you have sex at least 3 times the girl will want to stick around you which means you can build a relationship.

It has to do with how our brains work.

What’s other people’s experiences?

There is a truth to the old saying “Don’t try to understand women, women understand women and they hate each other.” – Al Bundy

You start to dislike them to an extent - luckily for me I have 2 sisters so it never went in to full blown hate.

I just accepted that - that is the way they are BUT it did turn me against men that go against the way things are. (White knighting, “Believe all women” , feminist men , the law, nerds, my dad).

I get a visceral disgust reaction to them - funnily enough much like a woman.

SeamoreBo0bz · 2024-09-10T13:19:30+00:00

you are 100% right.

guys and girls will deny sleeping with her soon as possibly couldn't POSSIBLY be good but it likely triggers something in the subconscious that improves attraction.

you gotta get physical asap if she's in to it.

mmmfritz · 2024-09-11T05:26:58+00:00

There are two huge survivorship bias going on here that will do absolute numbers on any bros head. The first is that you’re looking for long term partners in cold approach, when most of those sloots will bang you anyway. That’s why your worldview is distorted. And the second issue is trying to confirm your bias with all these sad chauvinistic takes on dating like it’s poisonous and corrupted.

I think the issue here is that seduction and gaming is full of toxic and incongruent behaviour that manifests in poor interactions and crummy relationships. If you think negatively through this whole experience then chances are you’re doing it wrong.

CarabaoBAC · 2024-09-11T05:29:07+00:00

Idk. I feel less shame about sex. If anything, learning to approach changed the way I looked at women who I would often pedestal until I was like 20. Now I think there's a shared humanness about casually talking, fucking around, feeling like hot shit with other people. When I got to that I felt like I was with real ones who also feel like hot shit in their own way and grew out of praying for a fantasy of being worthy enough to be hot shit.

To learn abundance is to see quality in myself above the genetic, socioeconomic lottery.

Phenom_Mv3 · 2024-09-10T21:57:15+00:00

You can still be wholesome and have game. Just be masculine and direct/decisive without fear which gives an edge to you

Ok_Potential359 · 2024-09-10T22:31:20+00:00

Yup. I hate that courtship isn’t really a viable strategy for building rapport, have to fuck first before you can build anything meaningful. Total opposite of what I want but women universally pull this same stupid shit.

bullexpress · 2024-09-10T23:01:49+00:00

I worked as a dating coach with the mentors who taught me cold approach.

Now I teach desirable trait mindsets, inner work, developing masculine traits, online dating and texting game transforming boys in to men that women desire

It is what it is man. There are a lot of ways actually

One could be sex leading to relationship

Another is few dates leading to sex and then relationship (again sex would’ve already happened so sex still takes precedence here)

Now I can cold approach like 5, get laid within that range and then analyse person if they are fit for even getting in to seeing phase

Let’s not bash reality, women and sex since sexual energy is the most powerful and potent energy in universe

I am not a player but player made, I am simply a lover of women :)

Global-Anteater-4019 · 2024-09-10T14:20:09+00:00

I had this fairytale idea that you could meet your wife through cold approach but I’ve had more successes having casual sex than forming a relationship. What’s other people’s experiences?

Having casual sex is a better way to get into a relationship than courting her the "regular" way. If you can't keep a girl you want after it might be you.

kitaeks47demons · 2024-09-10T20:44:11+00:00

Yes. It is liberating. Knowing i can let my balls hang and essentially get what i want with less effort has been a great experience.

Worried-One2399 · 2024-09-11T03:33:07+00:00

I can’t say mind have, but I do know some people who’s views have changed. I think in 10x more confident now than I was say 5 years ago.

I’ve gained this confidence w/ in the last 8 months-1-year. I’m a 33M, moved to a new state (Beginning of AUGUST) & it’s been SOOOO much better than where I was @ before

I’ve noticed how woman’s brains work which isn’t a bad thing. I can’t say it has changed my perception of them however. It’s actually made me want to talk to them more & get to know them more. 🤷🏼‍♂️

Affectionate-Ant4888 · 2024-09-11T05:49:20+00:00

learning game will help you practice get experience to find the right one. good post anyway,

Electrical_Owl_8169 · 2024-09-11T16:45:01+00:00

That’s the way it used to be before boomers fucked everything up in the 60’s. Unfortunately today, you have to have sex to have a relationship

Secret-Product-368 · 2024-09-10T11:10:34+00:00

I’d rather meet a woman, for casual sex or a relationship, through cold approach any day but i’m still trying to build confidence to even cold approach a woman for the first time. Way better than dating apps imo. Dating apps are sad. You’re just another number amongst a catalog of men they can choose from so you usually get ghosted or barely any conversation unless you’re the most interesting guy ever.

Turbulent_Cry3134 · 2024-09-11T08:28:17+00:00

Lolz... There is not much of a game in reality... Women can see through your bullshit, when you'll gonna learn? You must look great and have sophistication / real deal Convo skills and charisma that's all.

Title	Has your views changed since learning game
Author	Sharp-Safety-9260
Upvotes	236
Comments	96
Date	September 10, 2024 8:59 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1fddchm/has_your_views_changed_since_learning_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/has-your-views-changed-since-learning-game.1530044 https://theredarchive.com/post/1530044

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