Are women more intimidated by the husband material guy vs. the fuckboy

spanglesandbambi · 2024-11-28T14:11:16+00:00

No, when I was dating, I would ignore any man who wasn't who I would date (I dated to marry). I just saw them as getting in the way, like why would I waste my time? This isn't what I want. I will say I was still polite, just not willing to entertain them.

TSquaredRecovers · 2024-11-28T14:21:14+00:00

I've never really separated guys into categories like that. All of my relationships started out casually as sort of FWB situationships and then progressed to serious, long-term relationships. And no, I was never intimidated by my partners.

attendquoi · 2024-11-28T17:34:05+00:00

I wouldn't say I've ever been intimidated by either one. Both categories of men are hot. But the fuckboy is disposable.

Xeltar · 2024-11-28T14:55:02+00:00

The former of course. Husband material to me is physically attractive and has traits I admire, FB is just physically attractive or fun.

thatskappa · 2024-11-28T15:29:31+00:00

Dating isn't a recreational activity for me. I wouldn't flirt with a dude I didn't see as husband material.

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-11-28T13:27:41+00:00

I don’t think I’d use the word “intimidated,” but yes she generally cares more about what the husband material guy thinks of her, for obvious reasons. This is of course assuming she knows that he’s one or the other, in reality, people don’t always fit into tidy little categories.

Truly intimidating people are fairly rare (usually high-earners with intense personalities), being a fuckboy or husband material doesn’t really play into it.

Fab_Glam_Obsidiam · 2024-11-28T13:42:15+00:00

Flirting with a fuckboi means I'm also not looking for anything serious. The stakes are inherently lower than if I was scoping out relationship prospects.

ttthrewawayyy · 2024-11-28T16:55:40+00:00

I mean I become fairly emotionally attached to people simply by virtue of being physically attracted to them, so everyone gets put in the relationship category until I have a reason to believe that wouldn’t work. I’ve also dealt with a lot of social anxiety over the years so people in general are intimidating. Who I’m most nervous to talk to really depends on a combination of how attracted I am, my mental health at that particular time, how well I know someone, and how much of an effort the other person puts into initiating with me. But again, I’m probably not the most representative of women.

mashedturnip · 2024-11-29T16:14:53+00:00

I don’t care to marry someone who intimidates me

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-11-28T15:15:47+00:00

i dont understand "intimidating", what do you mean? I've never been intimidated in flirting with men

RoseyButterflies · 2024-11-28T15:21:30+00:00

No I'm not intimidated by men.

SayuriKitsune · 2024-11-28T16:30:44+00:00

I never felt intimidated at flirting with someone. It was usually the other way around.

Nellylocheadbean · 2024-11-28T13:43:58+00:00

I don’t see why either would be intimidating.

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EulenWatcher · 2024-11-28T16:50:48+00:00

It’s a silly question for me, because I’ve never flirted with a fuckboy to start with. I show romantic affection only to people I’m into, and it’s a really rare event. It’s a “husband/wife material” for me or nothing.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2024-11-28T20:03:48+00:00

I wouldn't engage with a dude for any kind of relationship if I was uncomfortable talking to them.

I've had relationships that were "I'm interested in being in a serious relationship" from the get-go, I've had others that turned into a serious relationship after being casual for a bit. I was comfortable flirting and talking with all of them, otherwise we wouldn't have ended up together.

As for fear of rejection - I suppose that's always there to some degree, being rejected sucks regardless of who is doing it. But yeah, if I really liked someone and wanted to be with them, exclusively, for a long time, it would suck more than if I just thought someone was hot but that's it.

MailenJokerbell · 2024-11-28T22:02:24+00:00

I don't think women are intimidated by either. Fuckboy is basically that so women already know that's not going anywhere. And husband material is kind of a very vague term?

Very handsome men in general are more intimidating, though.

meangingersnap · 2024-11-29T19:54:46+00:00

Never been intimidated to flirt with someone I’m just me if they like me they like me if they don’t it’s their loss anyways

Gilmoregirlin · 2024-11-30T00:15:44+00:00

Neither. I only met one man in my 47 years of life that intimidated me. And I have dated a Lot.

girlypop_xo · 2024-11-30T18:16:23+00:00

I know I am! I'm wayyyyy more intimidated by the husband material guy compared to a fuckboy. When I'm flirting with someone I see as a potential long term partner, I get this deeper fear of rejection because it feels more personal. If I'm turned down by someone like that it takes a hit to my self worth because they represent something I really want.. Stability, commitment, a shared future. I recently went through this and I'm still working my way through this depressing aftermath of losing a guy I saw as husband material.

But with a "fuckboy" my expectations are much lower and my emotional investment isn’t really deep so rejection doesn’t hurt as much. There’s less pressure for me to be perfect or meet certain standards which makes it easier to flirt without worrying about rejection. The stakes will always be higher with someone we see as husband material so that can naturally feel more intimidating.

CherryPieAlibi · 2024-12-05T03:02:41+00:00

Why would I be talking with “the fb”? Why waste your time talking to any man you don’t take seriously..?

Financial_Leave4411 · 2024-11-28T12:06:25+00:00

The egg doesn’t chase the sperm. Flirting with any man before he approaches you and takes you out on a date is stupid and a waste of a woman’s time. “Intimidation” doesn’t play a role at all and is just a shaming tactic used by men to try to get women to do the do the work of a real man so that he can get princess treatment.

Title	Are women more intimidated by the husband material guy vs. the fuckboy
Author	different26262
Upvotes	21
Comments	100
Date	November 28, 2024 11:23 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1h1tw9m/are_women_more_intimidated_by_the_husband/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-women-more-intimidated-by-the-husband-material.1537110 https://theredarchive.com/post/1537110

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