Discussion: why do men think they can bring nothing to the table and still be valued? Why should we value a man who offers NOTHING?

2021-04-04T03:28:11+00:00

Men are historically the "owners" and now that women in the last 50 years have gained human rights and financial rights we don't have to panic at the disco and find a man to own anything.

Imagine if men had to have a woman's permission to own a bank account, buy a car, or rent a home, open a mortgage. Imagine if they had to be married AND have their wife's permission to buy a condom.

They'd be all up in the self-improvement magazines and the cosmetics section too. Honestly, I wish today's men could live a year in our grandmother's shoes, then a year in ours. That would give most of them a stroke.

ThrowRA_lantern · 2021-04-03T23:55:51+00:00

Literally children who expect Mommy gf to give them unconditional love.

Having severe flashbacks of a lazy LVM ex that moped about how I “wasn’t accepting him for who he was” when he’d treat me real horribly and I asked him to do better as a bf.

miss_peach94 · 2021-04-03T23:17:12+00:00

Because society and their mummies told them so

purasangria · 2021-04-03T23:51:19+00:00

Male entitlement knows no bounds.

When I was OLD-ing, I would get men rolling up in my inbox who were overweight, blue collar, and high-school educated thinking that they could somehow date an attractive woman with her own business and a graduate degree. They just don't get it.

Or the 60 to 70 somethings, that think any woman over 40 (the Wall?) should be happy to date their wrinkly asses, when I look young enough to be their daughter.

They are delusional and entitled.

souredskittles · 2021-04-04T04:48:30+00:00

They think they have value because we keep fucking with them

There is a great post on the fds website that summarized this. There was an open post that allowed men to comment on what value they bring to a woman. They fumbled on this one and it was concluded that they think they have value because we give them too much relevance. I recommend reading it because it’s quite interesting.

loftycries · 2021-04-03T23:16:46+00:00

All these men have to offer is the audacity 🙄

myoklife · 2021-04-04T00:02:10+00:00

I have wanted to talk about this one dude for a long time on here and this is my opportunity.

Years ago (deep in my pickme days) I met a guy on tinder and went on a few dates with him. He actually took me on proper dates but man he was so awkward, and he kind of fat/bald-fished me - I was willing to look past it cause he was generally nicer and more respectable than the others.

Well, there was one issue. He was clearly the baby of the whole family tree and patted himself on the back for the littlest things. He posted every minor W on social media and his grandparents, aunts, mom, whatever would shower him with praise. One time I shit you not - he posted a picture of a word he wrote because he was particularly proud of the way he wrote the letter 's' (his handwriting was not good and the s was not that exciting). Another time he posted a picture of a button he had sewn himself. One family member was like "wow! I see a costume designer in the future!"

It was a huge turn-off. Like, this was a grown ass adult in his thirties constantly seeking and receiving praise from his family for every tiny thing. And he wasn't particularly accomplished. Guy was basically praised for being mediocre to the point where he would never progress beyond mediocre because he really thought he was the best.

_queeeen_ · 2021-04-04T00:29:58+00:00

Even when you have a lot to offer, the messed up attitude LVM/NVM find something to nitpick. If he starts critiquing early and wrongly, GTFO. There’s a difference between wanting better for your partner and being a jerk.

ThrowawayKITTY777 · 2021-04-04T03:23:03+00:00

We shouldn't value a man that doesn't add to our lives.

I was on a break from dating and relationships when I met my dude.

I had a life that revolved around my hobbies and my passions, spending time with my 3 Besties, doing things that made me happy when I met him.

Dude added to that.

Not only did he happily join me in stuff I liked, and TAKE me to things I liked catching the tab for my usual fun I would have been doing on my own....he showed me new things that I hadn't experienced. I'd actually been in a loop of "Same 20 places I like to eat out at, same dancenights I always go to" for a couple of years. Dude took me to "my usual" spots then suggested stuff he knew about. So I had a good life, but he extended my range of stuff to do.

That's why he's my dude now.

Platipus6 · 2021-04-04T03:29:42+00:00

Because the default, empty man is seen as having value, and anything above and beyond that is ✨amazing ✨ . Cooks and cleans and babysits his kids? OMGEEEEEEE

The default woman comes stock standard with cooking, cleaning, childrearing, therapist, and if she doesn't suck cock like a porn star she has no value.

Lionessoftheflesh · 2021-04-04T03:28:13+00:00

Like why do men not moisturize? I had a guy tell me that one time and asked me if i was impressed🤣🤣 Why would we be impressed that you take a self care step isnt it normal to care for your skin?

spiderunderweb · 2021-04-04T00:01:22+00:00

I believe it comes from this notion that “everyone deserves to be loved” or “you’ll find someone one day”. Do you see the words: deserve, find. Deserving is when you earn something. However it has been mistaken to men when they were children as “you will be tolerated for who you are and you don’t have to do anything”. “You’ll find someone one day” is wrong and it should be “you will love someone one day”. Finding someone looking and desperation without working on themselves. Boys have been drilled to believe that they are special the way they are and someone will tolerate it. When they grow up to be men, it turns into entitlement and so they believe they deserved love without earning it first. They can’t even reach the table and they expect you to lower it for them.

zazaleaz · 2021-04-04T01:44:27+00:00

As a woman it is not your place to say what's valuable, in their eyes. You are something to obtain, an attractive object, potential property. Men do not expect their property to have her own wants and needs and standards. They believe they deserve to own you, merely because they exist and are bepenised.

djburokas · 2021-04-04T04:22:35+00:00

they do offer something, it's called being nice, according to them lol! I've had so many men trying to date me, who have no ambitions, no higher education, still live with their parents in their mid-late twenties, even forty's and they do have the audacity to get offended by this

janeaustenfan99 · 2021-04-04T04:20:03+00:00

Cus there’s always some woman out there who’ll have him no matter what

Lionessoftheflesh · 2021-04-04T03:11:52+00:00

Most of these men think that looks get them a place above all the other men most of these guys are not even attractive but the Napoleon complex runs deep

throwaway32132134 · 2021-04-03T23:48:27+00:00

✨ M A L E P R I V I L E G E✨

thowawaywookie · 2021-04-04T00:20:31+00:00

[deleted]

n3rdgir7 · 2021-04-04T03:27:51+00:00

They think their crotch-shrimp is a magic wand with the power to make us worship them. They don't realize they're not even as useful as the worst vibrator and we're faking it most of the time because they're unhinged and have fragile egos.

dembar126 · 2021-04-04T01:01:33+00:00

Patriarchy teaches men that they have inherent value just for being male so they're always the "prize". And women are inherently worthless, so we have to constantly "prove" our value to them in order to be worthy of their commitment. This is why the world is filled with LVM and pickmes.

Suspicious-Traffic-1 · 2021-04-04T06:44:31+00:00

Because they constantly are. Some women will accept anything, and these men are aware that lots of women are so desperate to just not be single they’ll take anything. So these men DO get valued, that’s the sad truth lolll

frostedgemstone · 2021-04-04T08:59:22+00:00

I think modern men are having an especially hard time with it because today’s women are no longer forced to be with men as they have throughout most of human history. They enjoy the fact they are not really expected to be a sole provider anymore, but they don’t like that it also means women’s standards are raised in many other ways

spinsterchachkies · 2021-04-04T15:09:58+00:00

Because it’s every woman’s dream to catch a man (prize) and drag them kicking and screaming to the altar. It’s a status symbol that all of us have been dreaming about since we were little girls! We finally get to change our name from Miss Independent to Mrs. NV Douch and pretend we aren’t miserable on social media. We get to sacrifice years off our life, and have orgasmless duty sex with a gross man we don’t like. I wish I was one of the lucky chosen ones.

comet2004 · 2021-04-04T10:15:16+00:00

reminds me of when I used to ask the dating reddit for advice and it was always "LoWeR yOuR sTaNdArDZzzz". for what lol.

Papaverinum · 2021-04-04T11:11:57+00:00

Because they think they're the priiiiiiiiiiize. Funny, isn't it? 😂😂

Raquel22222 · 2021-04-04T01:24:27+00:00

Because they’re men. They automatically think they are superior and deserve us no matter how little they have accomplished. A penis is an accomplishment they think

tiavarga · 2021-04-04T06:22:51+00:00

I hAZ pEniS so I Am ImPoRtaNT! —Scrotes

Title	Discussion: why do men think they can bring nothing to the table and still be valued? Why should we value a man who offers NOTHING?
Author	taylor232424
Upvotes	548
Comments	81
Date	April 3, 2021 9:44 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/mji0n0/discussion_why_do_men_think_they_can_bring/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/discussion-why-do-men-think-they-can-bring-nothing.765289 https://theredarchive.com/post/765289

Comments

They think they have value because we keep fucking with them