In what way are women held to 'unrealistic beauty standards' in modern western society?

NarniaFox · 2021-06-29T13:11:42+00:00

I'd say that all people are held to 'unrealistic beauty standards'. What's considered "ideal male body" is unrealistic to maintain due to too low bodyfat percent.

Just look at what people usually post on Instagram. Most use filters, quite a lot use filters excessively. Advertising mainly uses filtered photos as well, although they shoot almost exclusively exceptionally attractive people.

I'd guess initially companies set these standards and now people enhancing them by using filters all the time. Companies are interested in making people insecure and creating non-existent problems that they can "solve" by selling their products.

Considering consequences...these aren't policies, but rather conditioning and expectations at least in most Western countries. How much it affects a person depends on their social circle, career and self-esteem. In Russia though your employer can require you to wear makeup/do your hair in a particular way even when it has nothing to do with you work, so it is a policy in some places.

Overall, people tend to treat you better, when you're good-looking. Considering that our "bar" for a good-looking person is pretty high nowadays, it also has its own consequence of not being treated as good as you could be if you looked better.

And there are consequences of confirming or just caring too much about these standards. Mental issues including eating disorders, health issues due to diets/plastic surgeries/some beauty procedures (skin whitening for example), lots of food and money spent on useless shit etc.

midwestufohunter · 2021-06-29T16:02:01+00:00

The models we wanna look like don’t even look like the images of themselves.

NinjaOfTheSouth · 2021-06-29T13:04:57+00:00

The men women want actually have beauty standards on women. So the guys with standards want their women looking a certain type of way. Most men don’t make this standards because they know they won’t get pussy.

UndeadRhodesian · 2021-06-29T13:30:52+00:00

“Unrealistic beauty standards” is a cultural backlash to the hyper-superficial culture that social media has created, and little else. It’s not meant to describe even necessarily just views men have about women, or even women about women. Men can have unrealistic body standards too. Imagine having an average dick and growing up watching 7-9”ers obliterate 5’ girls since you were 11 years old.

Unfortunately the whole message has kind of just become fatlogic incarnate. Oh well.

DplusLplusKplusM · 2021-06-29T16:31:27+00:00

Beauty standards change with the whims of Big Fashion, Big Makeup and now the "influencer" class. The "ideal body" of the "heroin chic" 1990's is very different from the exaggerated hourglass that's popular now. So while some of these extremes might be "unrealistic", they're always changing and that might be part of the complaint. The male body just doesn't get as much attention from the industries that control the look of the moment so in most cases all a guy has to do to stay en vogue is hit the gym once in a while and not get fat.

Vis a vis the ludicrous nature of female beauty, Tina Fey probably said it best in 'Bossypants'...

“Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits.”

MasterTeacher123 · 2021-06-29T13:02:24+00:00

So many women in America are overweight so I don’t think these “unrealistic expectations” are actually having that much impact. I wouldn’t date a fat girl but apparently a lot of men are ok with that.

It’s sad cause a lot of them are cute but it’s like damn if you just lost the weight lol.

_lemazaki · 2021-06-29T12:59:52+00:00

I can think of some about the standard.

1- BS... just a feminist excuse to blame men for a standard they don´t have.

2- We all know that women date using their beauty mostly, so this can be a critic coming from women themselves; They have to compete to appear younger and prettier to date into the market for a good men. So in fact, they are blaming the competition.

Comprehensive-Fun814 · 2021-06-29T13:03:56+00:00

The infamous okcupid data suggests that it’s actually men who are on the business end of unreasonable standards of attractiveness, not women.

When 80% of men are considered “below average” looking - and on the other side of the fence, men are just as likely to find any given woman either attractive or unattractive. I simply cannot take this oft repeated line about women and unrealistic beauty standards seriously in the face of data like this.

Just another example of what women often say being wildly out of alignment with observable data and reality.

Jakes1967 · 2021-06-29T12:57:05+00:00

I hear it said that women are held to unrealistic beauty standards. I am curious as to how this is the case...

Don't be too fat

...what kind of consequences do women that don't conform to these standards face?

Body positivity says zero consequences

I am also curious as to who it is that's setting these unrealistic standards on women, and why it is primarily females (as opposed to males) that supposedly suffer from this.

Realistically, the fashion industry.

chubbybutt22 · 2021-06-29T13:34:46+00:00

The biggest ones I can think of off the top of my head are the hair removal and the pore-less look so popular because of filters and airbrushing. Also weight and body shape. I know body positivity is a dirty word here. And yes weight is controllable. Although I do think that when I grew up there was a level of thinness that was not attainable for a lot of women. Also, there’s some body shapes that you just can’t change. And I don’t mean weight. I mean like the size of your breasts and the way your weight is distributed.

Also women aren’t allowed to age. We are force-fed that we peak between 18 or our mid 20s. And we are supposed to never deviate from that look if possible.

If you don’t conform to acceptable beauty standards it can affect you getting a job. Definitely dating will be harder. But you can choose to not participate and probably be fine. Everything’s just gonna be harder.

ETA: Ask a question about women. Woman answers. Downvote woman.

wtknight · 2021-06-29T13:40:31+00:00

I think that there is a large segment of women that likes to complain about having to work to fit some ideal appearance. Not all women are like this, as many do enjoy putting the work in to become more attractive.

I think that, with men, there are more of them willing to put in this work rather than complain. I’m not sure if it’s testosterone, they consider the eventual status and sexual reward more beneficial, or if it’s just purely cultural. I’ve been overweight at several points in my life, had acne when I was young, and am balding now, and have never thought once about complaining about unfair attractiveness standards for men. Rather, I’ve striven to either fix or compensate for these issues. I think that most other men tend to view this similarly.

I do think that there are more men complaining now than in the past. The internet and social media seem to fuel complaining culture in general, whatever that complaining happens to be about.

Ihateregistering6 · 2021-06-29T13:07:51+00:00

I also hate the concept of "unrealistic beauty standards", but really the only ones I would say are particularly 'unrealistic' is use of photoshop and airbrushing on social media.

Once upon a time, only magazines could really alter pictures digitally, so it was sort of understood when you saw pictures of models that there was some enhancement happening there. Nowadays, anyone with an Instagram profile can touch up or alter their pictures, which I think makes more women think that the look of XYZ Instagram influencer is obtainable, because, hey, they're a 'real woman', not a supermodel!

Like I said, that's a small potatoes thing overall, and most of those same Instagram girls also post videos of themselves, so you can easily see that they are, in fact, really hot.

Aldabruzzo · 2021-06-29T13:43:51+00:00

The only people holding women to unrealistic beauty standards are themselves and other women.

Men are in no way, shape, manner or form holding women to ANY unrealistic beauty standards.

When 300 pound female "models" lumber onto the cover of Cosmo and Vanity Fair, women aren't being held to unreasonable beauty standards.

When this woman is held up as a "standard" of "objective beauty", women aren't being held to unrealistic beauty standards.

When a woman who looks like this can get 5000 matches on tinder, men are not holding women to unrealistic beauty standards.

milkyymochii · 2021-06-29T17:30:33+00:00

The top overt beauty standard for women rn are:

Hourglass figure “thicc”
Nice big round ass, nice titties
Flat stomach
Neotenous features (full lips, pretty eyes, button nose, etc)
Poreless skin

This mainly applies to young women and those within the ig-twitter sphere. Also, plastic surgery is at an all time high for women. Women spend BILLIONS on skincare because aging is apparently not allowed.

Cimorene86 · 2021-06-29T13:21:17+00:00

In my personal experience, we aren't actually held to unrealistic standards.

Do unrealistic standards exist? Yes.

Is there pressure from peers, parents, potential dates, and sometimes even employers to conform to them? Yes.

Does a woman living in any first world country have to care about them or abide by them? No.

Just my personal experience as a woman who can't force herself to give enough of a fuck.

alberto-hoff · 2021-06-29T13:54:13+00:00

It usually applies to teenagers and younger women.

As you grow up you're bombarded with images of women that look a certain way that is NOT attainable. Whether it's surgery or Photoshop.

Subsequently, they feel shit about themselves and there we have large swarves of teenage girls with body dysphoria and self esteem issues that manifest as depression and all sorts.

No one is blaming MEN - the blame lies in society who play along with this and perpetuate it.

This is exactly why body positive is a thing, and good luck to it. Now when women shop for clothes they see models with stretch marks and different body sizes and shapes. (Not just plus size, I might add).

Women know that looks is the main reason men date them, so there's huge pressure to look a certain way.

2021-06-29T15:08:03+00:00

Absolutely zero. Women are bitching that Chad Thundercock wont use them as a pocket pussy if they dont look like a super model. Chad can make those demands considering they put in the effort to have a sub 10% bf. Women are mentally retarded and ignore 80% of men that doesnt want a woman that excessively eats. There is no excuse for a woman to weigh over 200lbs

spinsterchachkies · 2021-06-29T14:58:49+00:00

Have you seen Instagram? Now compare that to real life women

psypD · 2021-06-29T15:13:55+00:00

For the type of woman that uses that expression it comes down to:

not being obese
shaving their armpits.
not dyeing their hair green.
not having tattoos of vegetables or some such nonsense all over their bodies.

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-06-29T13:27:37+00:00

Unrealistic beauty standards are that women are expected to look a way that literally no woman looks naturally. Women who don’t shave their entire bodies and wear makeup are considered unattractive, sloppy, and unprofessional. I think “beauty standards” are somewhat different from “unrealistic beauty standards,” so I’m just focusing on expectations that don’t exist or rarely exist in nature. For examples, look at any Instagram influencer. She’s had surgery. She’s wearing makeup. She’s facetuned. Which is all fine, but people, men especially, have started to expect women to look like that and consider normal looking attractive women to be ugly.

As for who is responsible for enforcing these standards, I’d say both genders are complicit, but men’s preferences and attitudes toward women are behind it. Women see beauty in most women and try to build each other up. Men are much, much more critical. Say what you will about women being catty, but if you go to any comment section where a woman’s looks are being discussed, almost all the negative comments will be from males.

Men also are subject to unrealistic beauty standards, but the difference is they are still seen as valuable if they don’t meet them and people just generally think less about men’s looks.

ohheyhi99 · 2021-06-29T13:14:42+00:00

In dating, it really depends on the partner. Some partners will have high standards while others don’t. I have heard that some fatter guys expect a woman to be thinner than he is, but this isn’t true of all fat guys. Most men and women don’t prefer fat partners, and that includes many fat men and fat women too.

In many situations, some professional, the bar for women’s appearance is passively set higher since lots of women around them wear makeup, making the average looks level of the women around go up. This bar can be set indirectly without someone imposing it, but cultural pressure can play a role too. Going against the grain can be intimidating I’m sure.

However, like men, some women are still above-average when barefaced while others are not. Unless the standard is being imposed, people have the option to be treated according to their bare face. People with more attractive faces get treated better.

CantBonkThis · 2021-06-29T13:30:29+00:00

In any way that suits their agenda.

miketrance · 2021-06-29T14:17:39+00:00

They aren't

Phoesilvle · 2021-06-29T15:16:54+00:00

I believe both genders are suffering unrealistic standards.

What I've witnessed myself or learned from talking with friends and family is the dichotomy of consequences.

On the one hand by not-conforming to the beauty standards one is more likely to become invisible to the environement or cause some ire targeted at oneself. (I'm thinking here about an overweight person allowing themselves to enjoy a coke or an ice or a piece of cake. Countless people will take thís as an invitation (to my shame sometimes myself included) for bitching about fat people).

On the other hand most people seem to have an inner voice, that is constantly comparing the own body to the ideal immage, which is a source of self-doubt and potential resignation.

I think the beauty standards get defined by advertisments and TV shows/movies. And since filters conquered the smartphones, by filtered instagram models, too.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-06-29T18:00:32+00:00

I would say accountability for yourself is one thing, I've never let a magazine or hot guys on Instagram bully me into an eating disorder lol, what I will say is that when it comes to unrealistic beauty standards I can see that term being used for the people that use a ridiculous amount of filters or makeup, guys who use steroids and HDH, women who have numerous plastic surgery, etc, if someone gains that body through unnatural methods, it's fair to point that out

0seagirl · 2021-06-29T18:17:24+00:00

Men will say "women just make other women insecure" while jerking off to the countless IG models he follows whose bodies are so heavily edited they barely resemble that of a real human being.

kittenlovegoddess · 2021-06-30T02:23:18+00:00

In dating, socializing with strangers, the workplace, school, etc. people of course treat others based on looks even if they don’t realize it.

everythingelseisfull · 2021-06-30T09:15:56+00:00

Fashion magazines tell women that any dissatisfaction with any aspect of their appearance is a major problem. Take a wild guess what fashion magazines advertise...

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Title	In what way are women held to 'unrealistic beauty standards' in modern western society?
Author	ItWasAlwaysOver
Upvotes	3
Comments	164
Date	June 29, 2021 12:48 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/oa7lnn/in_what_way_are_women_held_to_unrealistic_beauty/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/in-what-way-are-women-held-to-unrealistic-beauty.787819 https://theredarchive.com/post/787819

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