God why did I get married

Signal-Dot2326 · 2023-12-04T03:27:38+00:00

Beg borrow steal you need an attorney ASAP!

SpiritualEnema · 2023-12-04T03:31:32+00:00

Reverse the genders. Would this ever fly?

Get a lawyer ASAP

DatabaseSpace · 2023-12-04T03:48:38+00:00

You are entitled to spousal support which is like alimony but for when the divorce is ongoing. My ex wife had a job but they still hit me with $1,400 per month during the divorce. These things are done through domestic relations, try looking that up for your county.

Grand-Expression-493 · 2023-12-04T04:13:27+00:00

This is unethical but what the hell. Delete your history, pose the same question on r/divorce and pose as a sahm. You'd be surprised how the advice will be changed and how it can be so helpful.

Good luck pal.

soontobesolo · 2023-12-04T04:08:25+00:00

A lawyer should be able to extract money from her in order for you to have representation. This is not a unique case to them and is done regularly. Interview a few, choose one, and develop strategies!

whoisgodiam · 2023-12-04T08:24:45+00:00

First rule as a man, always have money lol

Remarkable-Potato21 · 2023-12-04T05:29:57+00:00

Without all the details, you have to find the resources. Say your income is $0 and as sahd you are facing this financial situation. Generally, it becomes apparent that marital estate needs divided. Does not matter the income provider. You do not need a lawyer to file the dissolution. The judge is tasked with determining the best interest of the children. You're sole caretaker and financially tied to the income of spouse. Thus, representation will be structured with fees coming from the marital estate.

If you are already close to finalizing without representation, you need to command resources from the estate for representation. Do not let this system fuck you. Keep calling and keep reaching out to dv attorneys, family lawyers and help sources. I wish I could guide you with more information but do not finalize without representation. Ask for extensions from the judge and state the financial discovery/abuse. She can threaten all she wants but the judge decides the division of assets.

NotUsedUsernameYet · 2023-12-04T04:14:41+00:00

First consultation with lawyer is typically free. Do it first thing in the morning tomorrow.

RossTheDivorce4ce · 2023-12-04T11:55:32+00:00

She can't sell the house without you signing. You can agree verbally to sell but you can decide what you sign and what you don't. You are also entitled to half of absolutely everything and also alimony. (once house is sold you should get a small apartment for you and your daughter.) You ask for 5050 but be the primary care giver then you can also claim child support. You have all the advantage here

probebeta · 2023-12-04T19:26:55+00:00

If she's the breadwinner then you are entitled to child support and probably spousal support too. Borrow money, find it, you need an attorney. Believe she will take you seriously once you have one. Do not bend! It's difficult but you will get through this.

In my position I make more than money than her and she's gone for everything she can because according to her that's what is fair and she feels entitled. Don't feel bad doing the same. If tables were turned she would be doing the same and more.

xadmin1 · 2023-12-04T04:53:24+00:00

Good question, why did you get married? That contract allows your partner to behave badly. Its time to get out

Lumpy-Prior3261 · 2023-12-04T06:15:43+00:00

Call a lawyer yesterday he can get those account frozen she won't get able to move any money she is trying to screw you it will come down she will have to pay for your lawyer you have to do it fast if she even calls them they won't represent you she can call every lawyers in town and your screwed

Fresh-Brilliant4550 · 2023-12-04T08:04:46+00:00

Get a personal loan if needed. Get your own credit card. Get a lawyer. She will end up owing you child support if you are a stay at home dad. Turn the tables and get what you are entitled to

Fsmith29 · 2023-12-04T16:49:30+00:00

Women have been dealing with this exact type of situation for years. But when women go through it all I hear is you should have picked a better man. But when men go thru it it's all sympathy? The doubled standard is real! I am very sorry that you are dealing with it your wife is just... Ew. But you don't deserve that. Why didn't you have a second job or something tho?

Trytosurvive · 2023-12-04T07:14:52+00:00

There was limited free lawyers in my country where I got some advice. They were family lawyers or retired family lawyers that donate some of their time at the local community centre every month. Maybe check with your local library or community centre to see if there are similar services around you. I recall people saying in divorce thread that if you have no income, you can get your spouse (if earning income) to pay for your lawyer but uncertain of rules around that and how to enforce etc. I would never sign an agreement with wife without any legal advice either.

ADHD_247 · 2023-12-04T15:39:55+00:00

Don't sell the home, leverage your share of equity if you can to get a lawyer. There are finance companies who can do this. I recently was able to do the same. The criteria is financial abuse.

LMS_THEORY_ · 2023-12-04T15:44:02+00:00

Have it been filed yet? You could do a pre file mediation if you haven't. Your negotiating position might be a little compromised since you don't have an attorney (yet) but if you really don't have any money use the income imbalance to create leverage for a settlement.

I'd also look into attorneys that do a payment plan and have lower retainer fees. You could hire an attorney for a couple thousand or less as a retainer then pay a few hundred bucks a month and have counsel

Professional_Owl5763 · 2023-12-04T15:48:44+00:00

Honestly you’ll be in a decent position when it’s all over. She’ll probably have to give you a fat check every month and you can use your extra free time building your skills. Hang in there bro. You got this!

organicwilly · 2023-12-04T19:22:57+00:00

First, I'm not God.

Second, I don't know.

But I ask myself the same question. This shit sucks. Why do they have to be so insane and unreasonable.

Can't wait to be divorced.

coldchillin-nc · 2023-12-05T03:50:11+00:00

Do you have a 401k from when you worked previously? Is your name on the loan for the home?

Ambitious_Flow9819 · 2023-12-05T22:04:31+00:00

See a lawyer, tell them everything and file a domestic violence restraining order claiming financial abuse.

captainchippsixx · 2023-12-06T23:11:50+00:00

Get a lawyer. Get protected! Yea she is trying to screw you. Use a credit card for the retainer. Refi your car to get $2000 for retainer. Call a relative do so fucking thing.

King_of_Corinth_ · 2023-12-07T00:41:15+00:00

Remember a few things. This isn't happening to you, this is happening to your child. Their world is completely collapsing. If you didn't work and stayed home with your child as you said, your soon to be ex-wife can actually owe you alimony. Some lawyers will work on a contingency based on the fact they believe you will ex-amount of months back alimony and you sign papers saying you will give it over to them. If you don't have a job you have zero chance of getting custody. Find gainful employment. Use family members or friends to help out with babysitting. I know this is happening to you but remember it's happening to them more. (The child) Remember the marriage was no good or the divorce wouldn't be happening. You probably regretting the divorce but afterwards you'll be glad. The goal is to make it happen as quickly and painless as possible. For you and your child. And if your wife has that much of an upper hand you wanted to be for her too so she doesn't destroy you. This may be horrible but if this is your reality it must be accepted. Call around to lawyers in this laziest part of town and ask about alimony and contingency. I wish you luck man you got to keep your head and remain calm. You can go downtown to the clerk of courts and they have somebody on hand that will help you file paperwork and give minor legal advice. This is at every courthouse in the United States.

HMI115_GIGACHAD · 2023-12-07T08:01:52+00:00

try to search up law schools. law students may be able to help you for the discount. email one of the your situation

by the way, sometimes you have to pay small prices to become free again. A divorce and a restart can be a blessing in disguise man. Don't be scared of a temporary "downgrade" (renting or living in a smaller place temporarily) when you begin to set goals for yourself again after the emotional healing and focus on yourself you will find that happiness come back and you will meet the right woman. The next time around, you will have more experience and know what to look for.

Mopstick86 · 2023-12-08T02:50:41+00:00

Don’t sell your house!!! That’s my biggest regret. I don’t care about her or the divorce. I’ll never get a $300,000 home at a 2.4% rate ever again. Plus she spent most of the money we made from equity after the sale. Hate that all the time.

Majestic_Internet_53 · 2023-12-21T22:29:49+00:00

You need to start going to as many lawyers as you can for a “free consult“ every lawyer you see for a consult would be a lawyer that she can’t retain.

Title	God why did I get married
Author	ReallyNowSeeYou
Upvotes	40
Comments	83
Date	December 4, 2023 3:24 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/18ab52y/god_why_did_i_get_married/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/god-why-did-i-get-married.1239990 https://theredarchive.com/post/1239990

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