In WW2, a top RAF officer went to the engineers who designed his planes demanding that they reinforce parts of the fuselage. "My planes keep coming back with holes in them" he said. The engineers agreed to reinforce the fuselage, but not in the places the officer requested. They reasoned that the other areas needed reinforcing, as those were the areas where the planes wouldn't return if shot.

How does this link in with dating. Well I'm speaking as a straight man attempting to attract straight women. The women that tick all the right boxes, meaning they are attractive, motivated, kind, clean, caring, well presented and crucially have realistic standards and a desire to commit to a relationship, are most likely already in a relationship. Not because they are with a Chad, just because someone else got there at the right time, and I missed my opportunity.

Therefore, when we look at available women, we are looking at a minority of women who, for whatever reason, aren't in a relationship. Meaning they fail to tick one or more of those boxes. This could mean, regardless of how attractive you are, finding a women that ticks your boxes, and is also emotionally available and compatible is going to be hard.

The best women to date, are unfortunately already dating. If the top 30% of women to date spend 80% of their lives in a relationship. While the bottom 30% of women to date spend 80% of their lives outside relationships. Then the vast vast vast majority of available women you see OLD and even at singles bars and actively looking for a partner are likely to be from the bottom 30%.

While the same could be said for men, society has it that men do the pursuing. A "Chad" that is perfect in every way, will remain single his entire life of he doesn't pursue any women. While an "Chadette" equivalent will be pursued relentlessly. Thats just the way society is.

TL:DR single women are single for a reason. Don't beat yourself up if they want to stay that way. It's not you, it's them.