Do you think women are aware of the skillset guys have to have to be successful at dating

recyclablebanthas · 2022-03-16T01:14:41+00:00

Do you think women are aware of the skill set guys have to have to be successful at dating?

Please see the pinned post at the top of the sub. It states that one of the primary bars any post must meet is whether or not it's relevant to the question of: "Does this help someone get laid or land a relationship?"

Whether or not women are aware that social skills are necessary for successful dating, does not have any impact on whether a guy has those skills or not.

Dodechaedron · 2022-03-15T15:41:27+00:00

I am not sure how much they are consciously aware of the skillset guys have to have but they are certainly aware when a man does not have one of these skills.

norwegiandoggo · 2022-03-15T15:43:50+00:00

I suspect most women don't spend their time thinking about this. Just like you don't spend time thinking about all the effort women put in to choosing the make up that goes best with their skin tone

mightymite88 · 2022-03-15T15:55:34+00:00

[permanently deleted]

TheOtakuBruh · 2022-03-15T15:30:59+00:00

No they think we just get dates by existing like they do. A mediocre looking woman could get 100 sexual partners or dates with little to no effort. A mediocre looking man that has the same amount of dates or partners more than likely is incredibly charismatic, and has found out what works for him through years of trial and error since he was a teen. Women don’t need game to get sex, only men do.

DrewforPres · 2022-03-15T21:17:20+00:00

Sure they do. They call those guys players and fuck bois

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-03-15T15:42:15+00:00

The older I have gotten the more I realize that you don't need any special skills whatsoever. The issue with all of you guys struggling is that you have a messed up inner game and are trying to simulate what a normal confident guy behaves like by simulating external behaviors. Basically you are faking it and it shows and that's why it feels like a ton of work. What if you could just show up somewhere and women are already interested and all you need to do is open your mouth and have a normal conversation?

easternseducer · 2022-03-15T20:03:24+00:00

Most women I know do not like when guys are taking part in dating seminars/workshops.

They want to believe that attraction just magically happens.

YummyPanwitch · 2022-03-15T18:54:08+00:00

As someone who likes men and women, I’m gonna say two things: 1. Anyone-not just men-who is pursuing a dating relationship needs these skills 2. Are you aware of the mirroring skill set the object of the pursuing must have?

rienjabura · 2022-03-15T20:18:53+00:00

Bisexual/Lesbian/Pan women are aware, because they realize in order to date another woman, it takes that skill set.

That is also why dating skills is referred as an art, because like most arts, not many are proficient at it, or know the inner workings; they only know the results.

techminded · 2022-03-15T20:35:03+00:00

Probably not. Conversely, guys aren't aware of the skills women develop to survive the dating world.

Motorchampion · 2022-03-15T22:10:03+00:00

They don’t and they never will. Women don’t care about anyone’s struggles. They hang out at the finish like and pick up the winners.

koolex · 2022-03-15T21:26:38+00:00

I think women aren't typically aware and just assume when it doesn't work it wasn't meant to be, like a poor date is a representation of your romantic personality forever. As a guy who is struggling you're painfully aware that you keep getting the same poor results until you start fixing things. I don't think women are very aware of what exactly they are attracted to in men and they get enough attention to not stress about it.

Women also spend 95% of their time with guys who did figure it out, who can attract them, and they want commitment from those men. Men who don't get it just get rejected and the woman moves on or keeps things platonic, she isn't going to see his skillset grow.

So yeah most women don't think it's a skill, they just think you aren't right for them, until you have the skills and they assume this is who you always were.

Czekraft · 2022-03-15T18:50:32+00:00

"I'm willing to bet if this guy kissed you, it would have steered things in a more romantic direction making you want to see him again."

Bro. That's creepy. If she did kiss him, it sounds like she would've been forcing herself to. If you aren't romantic enough to point she's open to or actually wants to make out with you, then a kiss isn't going to change that.

It takes two to date. If a guy is turning the charm on with his skill set and the woman is just going with the flow, do you call that success? Or if the woman is doing all the flirting and the guy is just there for the ride, is that any different? It depends on your standards. How much are you willing to put up with a girl or guy when there could be someone to match your energy?

TheRiverOfDyx · 2022-03-15T19:05:43+00:00

They know what turns them off. I don’t think they realize the effort guys that turn them on have to put in - but those guys probably just think it’s a new normal anyways.

I don’t think anyone cares. Do what you have to to get a girl, nothing more to it.

mabden · 2022-03-15T19:15:20+00:00

|Getting a date requires skill. You have to have awareness to make a
good profile. You need to know how to banter well. You need to know
the right time to ask her out (not too early, not too late).

|Do you feel like women know about this stuff?

They could care less.

|She then mentions he didn't kiss her.

I have been ghosted/dumped/told no thanks by chicks because I did not escalate. Live and learn.

wont_give_no_kreddit · 2022-03-15T20:46:41+00:00

If you can talk to people and arent thristy/creepy about it, you have the foot in the door

Dc_comicsfan · 2022-03-15T21:35:19+00:00

I think you’re thinking too much into this.

VDKay · 2022-03-15T22:01:11+00:00

As men learn by trial-and-error, women who go out in dates frequently will also have observed patterns. However, women are more emotional and they'll rather focus on the patterns in their own emotions. In other words, they'll notice the pattern rather than being aware of the skillset needed to perform that action. A guy can be working on his confidence and approaches for months, but the girl will only think "he said this and it made me feel that way".

By the way that girl mentioning that he didn't kiss her is a good catch from her part noticing underconfidence. Most girls are totally oblivious. They'll just say "I'm just ain't feeling it. I have no idea why. I'm just not feeling it"

gregsapopin · 2022-03-15T22:48:18+00:00

no, if they were aware off all the manipulation then they could spot it and then they would date a guy that is genuinely trying.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-03-15T17:19:23+00:00

Men be like: “Oh no this woman makes it hard for me to put my dick into her vagina, how unfair!!”

Also men: “Wow, she is such an easy girl for letting guys have sex so fast with her, what a slut!”

Are you aware of the amount of effort women make to look attractive?

Do you know how many pictures they take of themselves before they decide to post one that makes them look as pretty and flawless as possible because if they don’t then they get called ugly, and other nasty things that take a hit on their self esteem? Or the amount of time they take editing those photos to get attention from guys?

The amount of time they take to put on their make up, and the time to dress with different nice clothes for each picture?

The amount of hours they spend in shops trying on outfits until they find one that’s good enough.

The amount of time they spend on the gym and how much will power they take to avoid eating crap to avoid getting fat?

And all the effort and chasing it takes them to get into a serious relationship with a guy they actually like, a guy who they feel they have to chase because the guy just isn’t that interested in more than something casual at first specially after sex has happened?

The amount of guys who constantly demand her attention, pressure her and insult her or harass her if she doesn’t behave as they want?

The amount of judgement women received for letting guys have sex with them or for how they dress?

How much women get lied to and used for their bodies?

Are you aware of all of that?

Or are you one of those guys who thinks the grass is greener on the other side?

It’s not women’s fault that you are just a fucking average boring dude with nothing interesting to offer to them.

And it’s not women’s fault that you guys are soo desperate for sex that your standards are so low that any girl will suffice leading to extreme competition among yourselves.

Women have it easy to get sex? That’s your fucking problem. Become gay if you want to, you’ll have it easier. Women don’t owe you shit because you are not entitled to them.

ninjamiran · 2022-03-15T17:50:29+00:00

Women put literally zero effort they just have to be a girl that’s it

AnonProgress22 · 2022-03-15T17:30:18+00:00

I think we definitely don't get enough credit or gratitude/appreciation for it, for sure.

twistedtowel · 2022-03-15T18:26:35+00:00

I think there is knowing and feeling/experiencing. I think women may know of it but do not understand what the scope of the problem. They will never feel or understand the experience (except for lesbians?) in the same way. Just like how us men will never understand the scope and experience the predatory nature of men (on street and otherwise). All relative and exceptions apply etc etc

2022-03-15T17:37:39+00:00

I think they think it's WAY easier than it actually is. In other words, they assume it takes about 1/8th of the effort it actually takes to be able to get dates let alone a gf.

shaggy1452 · 2022-03-15T20:28:31+00:00

Me and my wife and my sister had this conversation. Either they have no fucking clue or they’re pretending they don’t. They tried to gaslight me into believing it’s just as hard for a woman as it is for a man.

letsgetrandy · 2022-03-15T15:37:53+00:00

YES.

That's the point of the entire thing!

Skillsets are what makes a man attractive. We're not here to be pretty... women already have that job covered and they're doing a much better job than us.

The real question is, do my fellow MEN understand how much work WOMEN have to do to be attractive? Have you considered how much time they spend worrying about what they eat, or exercising, or learning how to apply makeup, or learning to make appealing color schemes for their outfits, or shaving nearly their entire bodies, or learning to gracefully and tactfully consider the opinions of everyone they talk to... all just so that we will find THEM attractive?

DarkSun18 · 2022-03-15T19:33:22+00:00

No, just like men are not aware of how much effort a woman has to put into getting a worthwhile relationship.

b_a_d_r0b0t · 2022-03-15T17:56:38+00:00

Of course not.

random_question4123 · 2022-03-15T21:41:44+00:00

Yea they’re aware. They’re playing their own game as well. Combined, it’s a game of cat and mouse.

However, there isn’t just one right way to play the game. Neymar and Xavi are both legends at the game of soccer. However, they play the game very differently. They add creativity or they keep things strictly fundamental. Either way, they get it done.

What turns girls off is guys that are either very stilted and not natural, or guys that aren’t doing what they’re supposed to to progress. Think about it like athletes playing their respective sports.

great_account · 2022-03-15T17:58:28+00:00

They have no idea. They have no idea when they want to have sex.

WanyCaleb · 2022-03-15T18:18:14+00:00

Don't think it matters in the grand scheme of things. Eventually, we all get a point where it matters not. So, nope!

americanCPA · 2022-03-15T18:54:17+00:00

F no

kathruins · 2022-03-15T20:28:36+00:00

straight women probably dont. lesbian & experienced bisexual women might be more likely.

KoozeMang · 2022-03-15T21:57:04+00:00

No, and they dont care. Why should they

cute_panda_paws · 2022-03-15T22:14:05+00:00

You can definitely tell when a man has game vs when he doesn’t

Mechanik_J · 2022-03-15T22:25:54+00:00

Who cares, Darwin was mostly right. Only the strong prosper and survive. Every relationship has a dominant and a submissive, which one are you?

mightymite88 · 2022-03-15T17:56:19+00:00

You dont need a skillset to be successful.

And everyone's definition of successful is different anyways.

Besides ; who cares what women are aware of ? What does that have to do with game ?

getyahfuckingyeeted · 2022-03-15T20:50:28+00:00

No, they probably aren't, and if they are, they sure as hell don't care.

FlanneryODostoevsky · 2022-03-15T20:52:10+00:00

Nope. They don’t care either because they don’t have to.

carlos1973633826 · 2022-03-15T20:58:17+00:00

It’s like a comedian asking “are people aware of the skill we need to be funny” above average social skills demonstrate higher iq which is a attractive trait. Some are aware others not

SassyDeluxe · 2022-03-15T21:06:58+00:00

We are, and we don't care. If we like you, we like you. If you're clearly running a script to get a date/laid, without showing genuine interest in us as individuals, we are scornful.

LandscapeClear1630 · 2022-03-15T21:08:33+00:00

They don't.

They generally think its easy. Obviously they have no idea what they are talking about.

Emotional-Article-43 · 2022-03-15T21:28:01+00:00

My thoughts? You just spit real facts there’s nothing else to say but it’s damn impressive once a man finally learns the full skillset and is able to execute. Women have no clue. Women are so clueless.

freaky533567556 · 2022-03-15T21:49:12+00:00

Yep & its regularly the butt of jokes

Nadallion · 2022-03-15T21:58:10+00:00

Absolutely not. Women immediately become desired once they go through puberty and can select who they want and don’t. They leap into the dating world being exposed to guys who “have it” and guys who “don’t” and that’s as far as they process it. I’m sure as they get older they realize, but at 18 it’s really just who’s hot and who’s creepy.

-xstatic- · 2022-03-15T22:14:58+00:00

Definitely not. Especially in the era of Instagram

ThatBoiFromTheEast · 2022-03-15T22:28:21+00:00

I compare dating more to martial arts or fencing.

Extra-Boysenberry · 2022-03-15T22:42:59+00:00

A lot of women don’t realize guys will hookup with girls below their means.

Nighthaven- · 2022-03-15T23:33:31+00:00

no. women speak purely from survivor bias. Most people in the world; for all things and topics do, actually. Know your data/ who is left to speak of it from the particular source.

Women are also more enabled to judge opinions & statements based on feelings on topic (and not actual logic) - as it usually plays out ok for their life - ie. crying: women comfort, men = punishment.

Thats why reddit and any other open anonymous internet forum is ridiculous for dating advice for (young) men:
1. 50% of population is women.
2. Most people judge statements (ie reddit posts) based on whether they feel related or insulted, regardless of facts.
3. Median age is 42 in the western world. Women who are single beyond +35y who can no longer get anymore attention very often give equivalent to incel/ femcel opinions/ manhate. Just go look at 1/3 of posts and replies over r/AskWomen
4. More 'loser' bias from people on internet.

Zerozilch0 · 2022-03-16T01:14:35+00:00

Sound like a Incel post

Title	Do you think women are aware of the skillset guys have to have to be successful at dating
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	204
Comments	209
Date	March 15, 2022 3:24 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/terhh0/do_you_think_women_are_aware_of_the_skillset_guys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-you-think-women-are-aware-of-the-skillset-guys.1264512 https://theredarchive.com/post/1264512

Comments