Q4W: Have you ever met a guy who's extremely good-looking, yet became unattractive once you got to know him?

beyond_relevant · 2020-04-03T19:13:49+00:00

Oh hell yeah. One of my male friends is objectively gorgeous, but every single time he opens his mouth he's just.... Dumb. The man couldn't pour piss out of a shoe if the instructions were written on the heel.

I'm actually trying to help him find a girlfriend right now, aiming for a maternal type who will find his childlike stupidity endearing instead of obnoxious.

OpdatUweKutSchimmele · 2020-04-03T19:05:45+00:00

Lol I have other good looking friends with the same issue. Women can lose, and gain, attraction based on your game

Incels hate that hard truth

Orange_Paisley · 2020-04-03T18:51:26+00:00

Definitely. Some men are attractive until they open their mouths.

Mimoxs · 2020-04-03T19:19:47+00:00

YES all the time! And honestly it goes worse for the type of men you see here a lot.

As much as the rp community doesn't like it, the worst one is the "asshole" act that they think women love. 99% of the time they feign disinterest, try to be "above" everything and make sure to remind you 100000 times of every reason why they're great. Do the thing where they will ignore you for a while, then hit you up trying to pull the hard to get, "I'm so good you have to chase me" thing. Hard pass.

The sad thing is it's usually not even their "real" personality but they feel the need to act that way bc they think it gets women. So many guys I've met who seem like good prospects but then get cocky once anything sexual is on the table. And honestly, I don't think these guys realize how obvious their "game" is. ("b-but that just means they're not doing it the right way! You'd never know if they were doing it right!")

On the other end you have the, starting to get creepy/mentally unstable vibes, which are just as bad.

death_by_1000_cats · 2020-04-03T19:18:49+00:00

Yes. I had a schoolgirl crush on a guy I used to work with. He was really, really hot. One day a group of us went out for happy hour and I was excited to spend some time with him socially and get to know him outside of work. The place we went was really busy, and as a result it took a while for our food/drinks to come out -- not outrageously long, especially given how busy it was, but long enough to be mildly irritating. We all just kept chatting, enjoying our chips and salsa and water, but this one guy was becoming increasingly irate and whining about how long it was taking. Like literal childish whining. He brought the whole vibe down for the entire group and after that I didn't see him as anything but a whiny little bitch.

2020-04-03T18:56:22+00:00

Oh alllll the time.

dylang92 · 2020-04-03T19:24:21+00:00

[deleted]

AngelxEyez · 2020-04-03T19:38:54+00:00

Yes !!!! Met women like this too. You can be attractive/cute/hot and ruin it with a shitty personality/attitude.

Def not just looks that matter. Being an all around decent human is a make or break

chocolatefondant21 · 2020-04-03T20:03:26+00:00

Yes. Just because a guy is attractive doesn't mean women are thirsty and desperate to have sex with him. If he could just learn to act like a normal person, and then politely ask if she's interested in casual or hooking up, then he would likely be successful. Sounding like he has no regard for the other person's feelings is a turn off because he could be dangerous or selfish in bed.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2020-04-03T19:59:33+00:00

yes. my most handsome BF i ever had, Rockabilly Dummy, became repulsive in 9 months and i dumped him

goatismycopilot · 2020-04-03T20:14:41+00:00

Men eliminate themselves when they open their mouths and start talking.

2020-04-03T21:12:08+00:00

Extremely common, very disappointing.

Sophiatab · 2020-04-03T21:44:09+00:00

It happens all the time. A guy can look good on paper or visually, but as soon as he starts talking he says some disgusting which completely repulses me.

Ballface8020 · 2020-04-04T05:04:07+00:00

So often. A few year back I made out with one of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen at a club. We were both pretty drunk and there was like 0 talking - just dancing together and then kissing. I didn’t go home with him that night because I had my period so we set up a date for the following weekend. I was soooo ready to sleep with him. I shaved and exfoliated and tanned and got my sexy lingerie on. And then there we are at the date and he is the biggest asshole I’ve ever met in my life. He was negging me and kept trying to one up me, would make a joke out of everything I’d say, his language was crass, his political opinions were barbaric. I left the date early and he looked bewildered that I had no interest in going back to his. There is nothing sadder than a hot man cockblocking himself. What a waste :(

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derpinat_butter · 2020-04-03T20:42:28+00:00

Yeah, a friend of mine (M, 24, 5,9) is very good looking. But when you get to know him you realize he is sexist macho man which is a turn off for me (F, 24).

honeydewmelonz · 2020-04-03T21:10:21+00:00

Omg Yes!! All. the. time. There have been really hot guys that I’d be so interested in until I get to know him more. After I see that he’s a jerk, he’s rude to others, he’s pushy, he flexes too much, he’s constantly making the conversation sexual, he makes jokes about awful things, etc. It turns me off completely and I stop replying to texts and calls.

Willow-girl · 2020-04-04T03:02:42+00:00

Yep, dated one in high school. Dumber than a box of rocks, albeit very easy on the eyes! But every time he opened his mouth, something inside me died a little. I think I lasted two weeks ...

SmoothPrimal · 2020-04-04T06:46:57+00:00

All the time. Me growing up, I hung out with friends that were very good looking. I am not too far from the looks stand point, but these guys were essentially the school crush. Every girl talks to them and fantasizes about them, yet I always get the girl. They just stood there looking pretty while I got laid.

The reason is this. If a guy is so attractive and too difficult to deal with, another guy who is still her type but better adjusted will swoop in and take that. You don’t need to be extremely attractive to get laid, you just need to be attractive enough.

Some attractive people are just so spoiled that they didn’t need to develop a personality.

I had a ex-gf like that and I was extremely conflicted. On one hand I wanted to break up with her due to sheer boredom, but on one hand I knew it would be hard to find another girl as hot as her.

reluctantly_red · 2020-04-03T19:25:19+00:00

Absolutely. Looks are the first thing you notice, but it doesn't override a bad personality.

Visserman75 · 2020-04-03T18:59:44+00:00

Women would open him on Bumble asking him a basic question and he'd ignore their question to force the conversation towards sex. Every. Single. Time.

So the guy didn't even want dates, he just wanted instant effortless sex. That doesn't mean girls didn't think he was attractive or that he couldn't get dates if he actually tried to get them.

He was probably just fine having hookups once a week with his current behavior instead of pretending to be someone he wasn't to score dates. Ideal situation tbh.

Barneysparky · 2020-04-03T21:52:47+00:00

Yes. I have also met guys who were unattractive at first but became attractive when they opened their mouths.

I cannot say strongly enough that the strength of character is the most attractive a man can be.

elinaeuw · 2020-04-03T19:44:40+00:00

looks are subjective and most of the time they aren't really everything. i met attractive guys from my perspective but as soon as i got to know them better they turned me off so badly i had to cut every contact...and yeah,it was bad stuff if you were wondering

OpdatUweKutSchimmele · 2020-04-03T21:46:10+00:00

I have known and seen many individuals that I consider visually aesthetic but that I dislike and do not wish to spend time with, yes.

who was really good-looking and attractive, but once you started talking to him and getting to know him, he became less attractive?

It's not like my opinion changed, do you mean "aesthetic" or "attractive"? It's not like individuals become any less visually pleasing just because I find out I don't like their personality.

And if so, did he become less attractive to the point where you were no longer interested in a short- or long-term relationship with him?

I am not interested in short - or long term relationships at all; an individual being visually appealing does not change that—if I want to look at visually appealing human beings I can do so on the internet for free; there is no need to get into a "short - or long term relationship" with one for that reason.

OddButton6 · 2020-04-03T22:41:41+00:00

Yes. Some men are attractive, but they don’t have their shit together. Thus unattractive.

crookedsummer2019 · 2020-04-03T23:38:10+00:00

Did a double date years ago with this hot guy and his less hot friend and one of my female friends. My date was ridiculing his friend, trying to make him look bad. That turned me off from my date entirely.

Female_urinary_maze · 2020-04-03T23:42:59+00:00

Yes, that happens a lot.

I once watched a guy who had previously seemed attractive wipe a massive booger on his judogi and just leave it there. I've been avoiding him ever since.

I also met a dude who I found attractive until he opened his dumb mouth and tried to convince me that the pyramids are magic batteries and my feet will help me release more estrogen if I rub them the right way. He also tried to share "the secrets of the freemasons" with me. It was an experience.

sublimemongrel · 2020-04-04T00:08:09+00:00

yes this one guy I was so infatuated with by what he looked like then when I got to know him a bit he was so weird I completely lost any inkling of attraction to him he became repulsive.

mistresswhat · 2020-04-04T00:24:22+00:00

Yep, multiple times both online and IRL.

The thing where they force the conversation sexual puts me off immediately, even when I'm explicitly looking for casual sex, which most women aren't.

Asshole acts put me off, so does feigned disinterest. Playing hard to get doesn't work on me.

I once went from "I'm planning to bang this guy tonight and I am excited about it" to canceling our date and ghosting because I asked him to suggest a bar for our date that was close to a certain subway line and he chose something in the opposite direction. He was getting off work pretty close to the train in question, I was traveling to meet him, and the weather was really miserable that night. He was gorgeous and I will never ever touch his penis.

ixofcoins · 2020-04-04T00:28:28+00:00

More often than not

Nikster99 · 2020-04-04T00:41:54+00:00

Yes and those guys got ghosted .

2020-04-04T02:11:46+00:00

Absolutely lol, looks aren’t everything.

throwawayluckygirl · 2020-04-04T10:25:12+00:00

Ofc, every time a woman dates an attractive guy and he becomes an Ex. He somehow graduates from the school of abuse and manipulation and cheating.

So guess what? Women redefine male's attractiveness based on if he rejected or her not to save their pride.

Grub09 · 2020-04-04T14:31:47+00:00

I loved watching my vapid and/or boring hot dude acquaintances in bars. Women would desperately try and start something with them, and they were too lazy or clueless to do the dance. The increasing dismay and frustration of these women was the best entertainment of the night

Kizka · 2020-04-04T17:23:22+00:00

Definitely. Was introduced to a very good looking guy (I was already in my relationship so I didn't have any interest anway, just noticed that he was very good looking). Turns out that he was very right leaning, very xenophobic. Became instantly unattractive to me. I still acknowledge that he is an objectively good looking guy but his whole persona is just absolutely unattractive to me and even if I was single I would have absolutely no interest in him.

dalia-chan · 2020-04-04T23:45:49+00:00

Nah, if a man who looks like nick Bateman act like a jerk I will just say that he’s a handsome jerk. He will always find a desperate pickme Beckybuxx

2020-04-05T05:12:49+00:00

God yes. The first time this happened I was 17.

He was either dumb or so intimidated to be alone with me he couldn’t act normal. I could not even kiss him.

And he was dead movie star Disney prince handsome.

ConsultJimMoriarty · 2020-04-06T04:03:02+00:00

I'm a gay man, but boy have I gone on dates with these dudes.

They always had to open their big stupid mouths and ruin everything about them. They even look ugly after that.

litlebitterthrowaway · 2020-04-09T23:56:39+00:00

Most definitely, any man that immediately pushes towards sex is super creepy regardless of their looks. Most times I start talking to a guy he immediately makes it sexual somehow and that is an immediate turn off. Any guy that finds joy out of ruining other people’s fun is a dick and not someone I’d be attracted to.

Sekina7 · 2020-04-10T02:27:00+00:00

Daily TBH. God I love the block button lol.

urnotmadeoftuesday · 2020-04-16T17:57:04+00:00

Absolutely. Physical attraction is only part of the reason why I'm attracted to someone. If you look like a Greek god but treat people like shit, are a narcissist, and have an overall horrible personality, the attraction is gone. I can still say that someone is objectively attractive without having an ounce of attraction to them.

On the flip side, I might not initially find you attractive, but if you have a heart of gold and a stellar personality, the attraction will grow. Ultimately, I care less about physical qualities and more about who the person is.

2020-04-03T20:23:26+00:00

[removed]

Title	Q4W: Have you ever met a guy who's extremely good-looking, yet became unattractive once you got to know him?
Author	tnais
Upvotes	26
Comments	143
Date	April 3, 2020 6:17 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/fudg8d/q4w_have_you_ever_met_a_guy_whos_extremely/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-have-you-ever-met-a-guy-whos-extremely-good.360125 https://theredarchive.com/post/360125

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