How do you forget her?

GlitteringBroccoli12 · 2026-04-03T09:24:19+00:00

Don't forget your enemies

Become_Pneuma · 2026-04-03T00:38:43+00:00

Take your ex’s age and deduct 10 from that number. The resulting value will be the age target of the lucky gal you will date to forget about your ex. Works 100% of the time.

No-Tomorrow8150 · 2026-04-02T23:45:30+00:00

It was easy for me. You are foolish to still feel loyal.

necron · 2026-04-02T20:56:55+00:00

Time

OkJaguar5013 · 2026-04-02T18:21:28+00:00

Remember yourself

Ok-Cause1108 · 2026-04-02T18:20:48+00:00

It will take time. Give it 3 years or so.

Beamformer · 2026-04-02T17:55:59+00:00

I just retired comfortably while she is working her ass off with zero benefits... I wouldn't say I want to completely forget her. I just had to contact her to remove me as authorized user on an old credit card.... based on the balance I could see on my credit report, it doesnt seem things are going all that great for her now.

No_Reason2236 · 2026-04-02T14:08:37+00:00

😴😴

Tvelt17 · 2026-04-02T13:09:14+00:00

Its no so much about forgetting as it is about forgiving and moving on.

Whatever that looks like to you is what you need to work towards.

DudeforRighteousness · 2026-04-02T12:06:30+00:00

Depends on what you did after she left. If you realized it was for the best even though it hurt you at first, then you can get up every day and look yourself in the mirror and realize how much better off you are without someone dragging you down to hell with them.

Otherwise, you can sit there and be upset the rest of your life over a person that didn't deserve your loyalty in the first place.

When I look in the mirror I see somebody that lost 115 pounds, has a much better relationship with his children and God, is fit and has an amazing girlfriend who actually loves me and shows me affection.

It actually terrifies me to think of being in that toxic marriage again. It was absolutely horrible and I think if you look at the marriage you had and you look at the person she actually was you'll agree

Again, not the person you thought she was or made up in your mind. The person she actually was

upvotersfortruth · 2026-04-02T08:44:19+00:00

Just re-watching Blacklist, and this quote/paraphrase stuck out at me: "She'll be the first thing you think of every day. Then one day she'll be the second. And then one day you'll realize you hadn't thought of her at all."

Ok-Guidance6491 · 2026-04-02T08:10:34+00:00

It takes time for the attachment to ease up. You never forget, but you lose the enmeshment and codependence.

ThrowawaySunnyLane · 2026-04-02T08:07:38+00:00

You don’t forget someone you were married to. That’s just not possible. You just try and let it affect your life less

Plastic_Efficiency35 · 2026-04-02T07:59:29+00:00

Always remember what was done to you. Forgive but never forget.

SaaSWriters · 2026-04-02T03:04:41+00:00

Loyal to what?

CuriousConnection69 · 2026-04-02T02:39:55+00:00

in the east, we have proverb, you fight poison with another poison. you got that, right... find another woman

retired337 · 2026-04-02T02:35:54+00:00

You never forget. But you have to move forward.

probebeta · 2026-04-02T01:42:07+00:00

Meet other women.

Minimum_Step5048 · 2026-04-01T23:57:32+00:00

I have a much harder time forgetting all the good times we had as a family of four than I do forgetting about her, but when I think back to when we fell in love I still can’t understand why she gave up on me so easily. She just quiet quit the marriage and never really discussed anything, refused therapy. I understand it’s just who she is but it’s hard for me to accept. We could have had a great life together if she was different, but this is who she is unfortunately

MonkeyBranchBuster · 2026-04-01T23:54:04+00:00

Develop feelings for another woman. The relationship doesn't even have to be healthy, in fact the crazier the new one is the better. You just don't have time and energy to deal with two insane women at the same time, lol. That's what did it for me 😅

Willing_Serve_970 · 2026-04-01T23:11:28+00:00

Time

crashohno · 2026-04-01T22:38:35+00:00

Sit in the truth. You feel loyal to someone who doesn't feel loyal to you. What does that make you?

You desire someone that doesn't desire you. What does that make you?

You remember someone who isn't remembering you. What does that make you?

How does that make you feel?

Sit with it. Don't pine, don't avoid. Sit with it. Let it be awful. Let the truth set you free.

HowManyBobs · 2026-04-01T22:25:04+00:00

Who?

Shot-Lingonberry-804 · 2026-04-01T22:16:57+00:00

It's very hard. I just got off a call with my STBX. It is too easy to get pulled back into what was. But you need to focus on what will be.

Soggy_Sound_000 · 2026-04-01T22:07:15+00:00

Remembering how she forgot about you.

Ok_Builder_3285 · 2026-04-01T22:06:32+00:00

She’s a stranger, but there will never be anyone else to take her place. I’m the garbage that’s been thrown away, nobody would ever want anything to do with me.

Robotic_Mann_ · 2026-04-01T22:06:07+00:00

Find a woman that will spit white monster In your mouth.

Edit: For context I just got out of a 9 year relationship 5 dating and 4 married. I took a job I hated that paid well so she never had to work, went from 410 lbs to 230 lbs so I could be a better father, and did everything I could to make my family happy.

Last year before thanksgiving she moved in with mom and said she no longer loved me and hindsight is a bitch because looking back for the whole year of 2025 she ignored all of my affection.

Divorce finalized in January and in late February I met a woman that made my ex look like a stuck up 18th century nun.

Boosted my confidence, ego, pride, etc everything to make a man feel like a king in his own life.

Sucks that I got divorced but I found my sliver lining.

Hopefully you’ll find yours OP.

Pmoneywhazzup · 2026-04-01T22:02:46+00:00

Only time will do it. It might take longer than you think.

riserobotrise · 2026-04-01T22:02:01+00:00

Weed helped.

ShaunyP_OKC · 2026-04-01T22:00:51+00:00

You don't really forget. You just learn to stop letting her fuck with your head. You have the power to change it.

PlaystationSwitchAWD · 2026-04-01T21:55:08+00:00

Pursue hobbies, go out with friends, get involved with community and volunteering. You can do it bro!

psychcaptain · 2026-04-01T21:52:48+00:00

The person you married is not the person you are divorcing. Honor the person you married by remembering her fondly as you move on.

Several-Eagle4141 · 2026-04-01T21:50:56+00:00

The woman I am with after will make you understand

Cufflock · 2026-04-01T21:43:47+00:00

You don’t forget and you can not because that’s how a functional brain works.

You should write down all hurtful things she has done and said and lied to you and manipulated you in details on your phone and memorize those, do not let your hormone trick you and clouds your memory.

Read those notes whenever your hormones try to lure you back into the attachment trap it wants.

ExtraLettuce555 · 2026-04-01T21:36:17+00:00

I don’t think you do. If she was ever an important part of your life, you’re stuck with her memory. And I feel like it’s a sort of curse that we have to carry.

Owww_My_Ovaries · 2026-04-01T21:31:23+00:00

Shes dead. End of story.

Mourn and move on.

Title	How do you forget her?
Author	nomohydro
Upvotes	21
Comments	110
Date	April 1, 2026 9:23 PM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1s9xw00/how_do_you_forget_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-do-you-forget-her.1576933 https://theredarchive.com/post/1576933

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