Crazy ex trope-do not fall for it queens.

AnneJedonia · 2021-03-09T14:33:44+00:00

[deleted]

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2021-03-09T15:44:28+00:00

The other possibility is that he deliberately dates women with obvious mental issues, because they are easier to hurt and manipulate.

Lingueen · 2021-03-09T13:17:55+00:00

i was seeing this guy in november who always mentioned that his past relationships ended because the girl was too demanding of his time. i got weary of it of course and found out a few weeks later how it was actually him who didn’t do even the bare minimum and expected me to just take what he gave (which was nothing). i dumped his sorry ass lol

mandoa_sky · 2021-03-09T14:46:35+00:00

both me and my friends have all had cases where we are the crazy ex - because the guys we were dating kept playing mind games/gaslighting/passing blame.

i WANT guys to mention the crazy ex - it tells me to run away early,

Equipoisonous · 2021-03-09T16:39:01+00:00

A coworker once described his ex as crazy and when I pushed him on what he meant by that he went on to describe a normal human emotional response to her experiencing the death of a family member.

Inspection-Critical · 2021-03-09T16:53:36+00:00

A man with a "crazy ex" is just admitting he has at least one confirmed victim.

Watzoo · 2021-03-09T14:51:31+00:00

I’m snort laughing!! This is half the posts in half the single dad subs and forums I’ve seen over the years. “She went insane and took the kids to her moms and when I got out, I asked for them and she said no.” Then 50 replies calling her a b***h and one lone downvoted wolf going, “when you got out? Out from where?”

rightioushippie · 2021-03-09T18:08:24+00:00

Actual conversation with an acquaintance -

Him: I am thinking of breaking up with my wife. She is too crazy and demanding.

Me: Really? Like what does she say?

Him: She is too jealous and controlling. She is always looking at my phone and wondering where I am.

5 seconds later

Him: I have always wanted to get with you. You are beautiful. I wish we were together instead. Him:

RhiannonEmilia · 2021-03-09T14:29:16+00:00

My ex tweeted, warning future girls who might have wanted to date him 😂, that if they bring up “stupid shit” they’re gone 😂 Lol the stupid shit I would bring up was him doing shady stuff with other girls and doing sexual things with a teenager when he was 20 🤷🏻‍♀️

Edit: I guess I should add that the teen was 15. Just a baby really

zorua · 2021-03-09T17:54:34+00:00

Oh yeah. My last ex... all his previous gf were abusive and crazy. Fell for that line.

When he would call me autistic, retarded, stupid when I would say anything he didn't like I would justify it... "oh he's had no experience in a healthy relationship before, its going to take time for him to be able to express things in a healthy way, its okay I will be there for him, he deserves someone to treat him with kindness"

When we would fight (him being horrible to me and me saying that it hurts my feelings) I would tell him "you need to be careful with what you say when you are angry because you can't take those words back. please stop insulting me" then when we'd fight he'd say how good he was for not insulting me even though he wanted to.

Well I spoke to his ex fiancee, the one he told me would hit him, break his things etc and of COURSE he would be the one to hit her first, to abuse her. Even got him to confess on video that he would "pin her down and deal with her" and that she would deserve the abuse for doing something stupid.

Nah. Never again will I go for a guy who acts like a wounded doe. Fuck you Cian, you deserve to rot in hell alone for all the women you've hurt in your 27 years.

GabbaG0ul · 2021-03-09T17:27:08+00:00

“bUT sHe’S cRaZy” Why have only heard that about myself when I stood up to a man who was trying to/or was exploiting me?

butteryrum · 2021-03-09T19:00:37+00:00

There's even a term for it : crazy making.

These people tend to gaslight the hell out of and treat someone like crap so badly until one day they can't take it anymore, pop, and then the person who instigated labels them "crazy".

How convenient. What bullshit. No, you're not crazy to be upset when you find out someone's been lying, cheating, and or leading you on.

Emergency-Feed8216 · 2021-03-09T18:39:50+00:00

PickMes keep falling for the hubris trap. "Yay, yay, my rating is boosted by another woman being put down!" Personally I think it's a dark triad trait.

I can honestly say I never bought into this and always had an intuitive "hmm" attitude if men put down their partners or exes, figuring A) he must be totally obsessive-compulsive and unable to let go (red flag for vengeful stalker) and/or B ) he's hoping my rabid competitiveness with other women will be triggered (red flag for cheater and "views women as catty tropes"). At the very least it seemed loserish.

In my first big apprenticeship in a high stakes, male dominated industry, I worked for two older assholes who each kept trying to bait me by putting down their exes, both very beautiful, accomplished Ivy League women whom I knew peripherally. I shrugged off the putdowns and continued to be friendly with the two women. When one of the assholes later harassed and tried to assault me, both women met with me to swap stories and submitted written testimony to the DA on my behalf.

The assholes did have their female flying monkeys though. Two whom I barely knew tried to attack me in separate incidents after I pressed charges. They apparently swallowed the smears against me without question. Consequently I see it as a red flag if any woman credulously repeats criticisms of the ex of someone she's dating or even exes of their male friends. I once fired a lawyer for talking subtle smack about the ex wife of the lawyer's husband, figuring the lawyer had probably been a mate-poacher who'd married the scumbag who cheated with her. Why? Because people who know they're in the wrong can't stop triangulating against their victims even in completely inappropriate circumstances. I didn't want a personality-disordered attorney representing me.

I do make exceptions for traumatized victims of real abuse. I was an advocate for dv survivors and victims being able to turn the tables and pick apart abusers and abuse enablers is an important part of healing, as is gallows humor. The advocacy org I worked with used to throw a comic poetry contest in which survivors would lampoon their abusers and abusers' enabling families and buddies. It was very popular. But the latter is light years away from the average asshole calling all his exes crazy.

505ithy · 2021-03-09T16:14:57+00:00

Nah cuz when I had an old fwb at work he would scorn his ex for taking their newborn without notice back home and cutting off all contact. Should of been a red flag but I was a dumb ass 18 year old who believed she was some ‘crazy b*tch’ rather than considering how fucked things have to be for a woman to travel 2000 miles with a newborn and never return.

Last I heard the cops got to her and keep requiring that she bring the kid for visitation but she keeps dodging it, saying she couldn’t afford it. And honestly good for her, some men are better off NOT passing down their asinine ways. Sometimes you gotta take justice into your own hands.

popsthrowsup · 2021-03-09T17:56:14+00:00

Hell sometimes the “crazy” is the volcano finally exploding.

He gaslights her, pushes her buttons, not listening to her, for months/ years.. then he does the same bullshit like he normally does; but today she has time, and she’s fucking done.

So yea she acts “crazy” because instead of the doormat or work through response you’re now being confronted and yelled at.

My ex told me his therapist told him I was emotionally abusive.

I told him to go to therapy, because he has issues with his mom/ dad and he told me that he couldn’t afford it. So you want me to believe that all of a sudden after I move and tell you I’m scared I’m going to resent you if you move too and don’t fix shit; you found a therapist only talked about me and she told you I was the issue. K

Edit: words

UnstrirringCoffee · 2021-03-09T18:15:02+00:00

Oh, men. I had a friend from college who always (and I do mean always) was dating guys with a long string of "crazy-exGirlfriends" and she just couldn't see the pattern. I kept telling her that she would be next on that list of sob stories he'd tell his next girlfriend. But no, she always kept making excuses for these guys. And my predictions always came true.

Xiena78 · 2021-03-09T19:30:34+00:00

It’s called “Reactive Abuse” and people that do the Abusing HATE when someone reaches their final straw.

MaleficentSize · 2021-03-09T19:24:37+00:00

I have experienced this with my manipulative ex. Somehow it was every girl he’s dated was “crazy.” It is a huge red flag in how a man talks about his past relationships and friendships.

I’m pretty sure he’s telling his new girls after me that I’m “crazy” as well.

Here’s an article I found when I gotten out of my relationship.

“His Previous Girlfriends Were All “Crazy””

How I Discovered I Was Dating a Sociopath: https://www.bustle.com/articles/199929-how-i-discovered-i-was-dating-a-sociopath

pao664 · 2021-03-09T19:33:20+00:00

If a man says his ex is “crazy,” there is a HIGH probability of one of two things: 1.) HE is the only who is actually crazy or 2.) HE did something to make her that way.
This is a message to my younger self. I am ashamed I fell for this line of bullshit with my ex husband!

CuriousWasabi76 · 2021-03-09T19:55:59+00:00

I remember this one guy I talked to said his ex was toxic and controlling because she didn’t like him being around other women who were just his friends.

Well, I learned just how opposite that was when I I learned how in love with his best friend he was but expected me to like him and be okay with it lmaooo. He was incredibly toxic and would have that best friend write his text messages in any argument with me I learned later. Now I’m the crazy ex and he’s the 🤡 I definitely dodged a bullet. Last I heard, he’s subbed to his friend’s onlyfans, plays 10+ hours a day on video games and is “highly renowned” for his gang in gta. Like he truly believes he’s the leader of a gang. Sir, it’s a video game 😂

Ladies, if they ever mention anything about their exes in a negative way, he is giving you a free look into his toxicity. Take that and run for the hills and never look back

eleguagirl · 2021-03-09T21:14:16+00:00

Lmfao my ex claimed he didn’t “dEsErVe tO gO tO jAiL” for battery on me and called me crazy or psycho plenty of times. He had abused his mother and exes for YEARS. Boy you had it coming to you. I wasn’t gonna be another victim. Call me karma, mf.

Greedy_Ad954 · 2021-03-09T21:23:38+00:00

Both my abusive exes had an a "crazy cheating ex" who would "just flip out and say she hated (him) for no reason."

If your man has a crazy/mean ex, pay close attention to what he describes. Did she steal from him? Hit him? Do hard drugs? Did she actually do anything at all besides being driven slowly insane with his bullshit before possibly, finally, cheating on him?

Your man is the crazy ex, not her. Especially if the worst he can say about her is "she'd flip out and say she hated me, then after a few years, she cheated." That's code for "she constantly tried to explain to me I was being an asshole sociopath and then she moved on once she realized I was incapable of meeting the bare minimum standard of decent human being, like any self-respecting person would do."

Dexaroo5716 · 2021-03-09T19:29:49+00:00

Yesssss!!! The last absolutely shit show I got sucked into involved the scrote outlining how all these women he had dated were the problem and were “crazy” and “stalked” him. Turns out he is a pathological liar and cheater and they were verifying their gut feelings that they need to get the fuck away from him before they catch a life threatening illness

libralia · 2021-03-09T18:47:45+00:00

Negative accountability for himself! Projection speak for i’M tHe CrAzY oNe! 😂

Bellaskywalker1 · 2021-03-09T20:14:04+00:00

God this is so accurate! 🙌🏽 my sisters married to this lvm , and they are obsessed with talking about his ex wife. Meanwhile this lvm treats her like shit. I’m trying to tell my pick me sister that he’s the one with problem but she don’t wanna hear it. I guess Jodete 🤷🏽‍♀️

KMDMD · 2021-03-09T18:24:38+00:00

You can’t imagine how much I needed to hear this. Thank you.

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Title	Crazy ex trope-do not fall for it queens.
Author	azureangel35
Upvotes	2111
Comments	65
Date	March 9, 2021 12:57 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/m15uaa/crazy_ex_tropedo_not_fall_for_it_queens/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/crazy-ex-trope-do-not-fall-for-it-queens.752192 https://theredarchive.com/post/752192

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