Real HVM shit

Whateverbabe2 · 2020-10-14T02:47:18+00:00

Ladies, NEVER label a man as HV based off what he spends on you. Please.

I read a report from the ex wife of an asshole billionaire. I could have sworn it was Elon Musk. Anyways, their first date was nearly identical and he told her to pick out as many books as she wanted and he paid for them all.

There are a lot of men with money that know some women will be easily impressed by displays like this. But to them, that money is nothing. Just a cheap way to bypass having to earn your trust and respect. Don't fall for it.

SkiesEclipse · 2020-10-14T05:11:52+00:00

I remember going on a date with this rich guy who was in banking. He picked me up in a beautiful sports car. He took me to a very exclusive restaurant in the city. He then rented out this dessert place just for the two of us. He opened every door for me, took out every chair, and paid for everything.

I wasn’t feeling the conversation with him however, and wasn’t really into him. At the end of the night, he leaned in for a kiss and I said no. I left and went home. Next day he blows up my phone, says he doesn’t want anything to do with a spoiled brat who couldn’t at least kiss the man who paid for her time.

Guys who think like that look at you as a prostitute, not a potential future wife. You have to be just as wary of wealthy men, if not more, because they will try to manipulate you and use their wealth as leverage to control you.

A HVM isn’t the richest guy you can find. He’s the man who is financially stable, AND has good character and makes you his priority.

textbasedpanda · 2020-10-14T03:01:56+00:00

That is a really sweet gesture but "real HVM shit" should be reserved for idk, demonstrated commitment over time maybe.

vibewitheasi · 2020-10-14T01:42:07+00:00

My current boyfriend bought me some things for my gaming setup and took me shopping while we were dating and getting to know each other. I’ve never been spoiled before and he says he just likes to see me happy. Like okay, way to show that you wanna get picked 🥰

kingunia · 2020-10-14T03:48:34+00:00

Stop romanticizing spending money on you, I really don’t like the direction this sub is taking right now. Spending money doesn’t mean shit, trust me, I was on really expensive first dates with stalkers and cheaters. pay attention to his character and if he wants to get to know you, if he respects you. Paying for the first date is neutral for me - I’m not gonna get impressed by basic decency. If you want to impress me, respect me and show me that you are a good person who really wants to get to know me.

Sad-Pumpkin5019 · 2020-10-14T02:48:55+00:00

This is a sweet gesture for sure, don’t overlook it. However I think what some people are trying to say is that a lot of LVM actually start off this way. A lot of men are extremely sweet at first. They show their true colors much later so enjoy this but don’t let it cloud your judgment later. If things do change that is.

Partypuppers · 2020-10-14T13:09:09+00:00

I don't mean to sound like a snob here but y'all need to level up in your finances and your lifestyle and stop being so easily impressed.

Buying a few books is not that expensive and you should aim to be in a financial position where a guy being able to afford a few simple books shouldn't set your heart racing. Honestly, raise your expectations! Books aren't that expensive. Raise your standard of living! Be in a position where you can buy yourself some boujie ass jewellery and designer handbags. Have a 6 month emergency fund. Don't date with a broke-woman's mentality.

Next time a guy does something like this, be gracious and thank him for his kindness but keep vetting him. It's not only about money, but about if he can demonstrate HV traits and consistency over a long period of time. I can guarantee you that if you've got your own finances, education and shit together, you won't be so easily impressed or swayed, because you can already provide for yourself.

Keep your standards high ladies.

divination__ · 2020-10-14T12:15:40+00:00

the amount of likes and RTs this has goes to show how women are so desperate to experience anything but the bare minimum from a man

yfunk3 · 2020-10-14T03:40:15+00:00

[removed]

creamtart_ · 2020-10-14T02:04:37+00:00

This isn’t HV at all? FDS doesn’t advocate these kinds of “dates” in the beginning. Read the handbook.

Edit directed to fellow newbies: when told to read the handbook, it is not an attack, it is an explicit sub rule to read the handbook before posting. While you may have your own opinions about what makes a quality relationship, that’s fine, but don’t debate it on FDS as FDS principles are non-negotiable. This isn’t a debating sub, it is specifically one strategy. There is no FDS lite, just FDS. The handbook covers this clearly.

MRgoudaonionspickles · 2020-10-14T12:13:10+00:00

Only impressive if the bookstore was a college one, and those were hardcover textbooks...

then you have my attention, SIR. hahaha

yellowpagethingies · 2020-10-14T15:06:35+00:00

I'm so glad other most women here have commented the same thing what I was thinking. First time I read this photo with its title, I could already smell love bombing in this situation.

2020-10-14T03:00:32+00:00

That isn’t a date. I don’t like what this post is implying.

2020-10-14T03:34:26+00:00

Ugh. No.

StrainingMyNeurons · 2020-10-14T08:12:39+00:00

What kind of shit is that? Just because you’re a student and can’t yet afford to buy several books in one go, it’s not a HV or even a grand gesture.

2020-10-14T02:29:57+00:00

[deleted]

2020-10-14T03:25:00+00:00

Y’all end up being Cardi B and Offset. “He cheated with 10 girls but he bought me Rolls Royce so he’s forgiven ... he loves me so much, this is real love” Men with money don’t care , they spent it to buy your trust.

Also BOOKS are chap AF, you guys are for real??? You can buy yourself like 5 hardcover books? That’s like 100 is that, let him buy you a diner for 500 like a real man🙄

LizardInFirst · 2020-10-14T12:21:46+00:00

My father always substituted money for love or time, so I’m keen to avoid that dynamic in my choice of partner. My boyfriend makes good money and is financially stable, but for my birthday he spent time on me as well as money. It meant a lot.

UnstrirringCoffee · 2020-10-14T15:13:37+00:00

Sure, this is financially generous, but it's not much of a date. Browsing and selecting books to buy is a solitary activity. Plus, this requires no planning and no preparation and requires little to no effort in trying to impress your date with your conversation skills and personal grooming.

Accountabili_Buddy · 2020-10-14T00:51:34+00:00

Adding this to the list!

jodibusch · 2020-10-14T13:26:57+00:00

Why is this being posted here? How is this HVM behavior? Maybe to a 10 year old who never owned a book in her life. This is grooming an object for conquest. Nothing about this is HV. No need to have an actual conversation in a bookstore, now is there? Sounds to me like a man with aspergers found an easy way to avoid uncomfortable connection with a human.

suspended_animation_ · 2020-10-14T14:48:00+00:00

I would never meet a guy at a bookstore again. I got sexually assaulted and I had to sneak out.

seashellseashell52 · 2020-10-14T03:39:29+00:00

😭😭😭😭this is all I want!

And I don’t even mean just having the money to spend on it. I mean having someone who encourages to be yourself, to learn, to enjoy your hobby without making you feel weird about it. Bc YES I have met guys who literally tease me for reading so much. I’m so confused.

mscristalconnors · 2020-10-14T15:14:13+00:00

Before y’all go into money isn’t anything...

It’s in the FDS rules. You should be vetting men and testing them...

Do not come is here saying shit. I’ve had HVMs give me money and they were HVMs.

It’s weird that’s it’s creeping to pick meisha territory.

Do your research.

imanewwoman · 2020-10-14T07:37:41+00:00

Are American men so cheap that women feel like a man who pampers them are special? Come on. In my experience from dating men from several countries, they find it extremely easy to spend on women - actually, SPLURGING - unless they are extremely stingy!

This mean absolutely nothing if the respect and emotional support isn’t there. Even if the man hasn’t got much money and worked hard to earn it, it might mean nothing at all.

I expect being treated with gifts and nice dates as one of the minimum requirements for a man to show interest in me. I’ve seen so many times that non-rich, shitty partners can give great gifts such as taking you out shopping, pay for all dates, buy you plane tickets, jewerly, etc and genuinely enjoy doing it. It can mean something, and it can mean nothing as well - doesn’t even matter how much he earns.

Have you ever spent dumb amounts of money in whatever crossed your mind even in you didn’t actually need it - like eating out, clothes, shoes. Yeah, that easy is for men to spend money on you as well.

Title	Real HVM shit
Author	legendary_chica
Upvotes	3093
Comments	119
Date	October 14, 2020 12:48 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jaqf83/real_hvm_shit/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/real-hvm-shit.320784 https://theredarchive.com/post/320784

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