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thatboyaintright0
[–]victoria------FDS Newbie490 points491 points492 points 5 years ago* (41 children) | Copy Link
I’d like to add ‘porn addict’ to this. as a 19yo most of the guys i’ve talked to or been with have told me they want me to do really fucked up things they’ve seen in porn, like choking and anal. if you tell them no, they just keep on pressuring you, hoping you give in. a lot of the sex i had before I found FDS was highly coercive. I’m really grateful to the HVW here for teaching me better.
[–]man-in-trashFDS Newbie263 points264 points265 points 5 years ago* (11 children) | Copy Link
I’m so sorry your generation are really bearing the worst of this porn-sick epidemic, and it must be just awful for you. As a woman in my 40s, I didn’t have to deal with any of these things at your age. Like literally, it wasn’t until I started dating again after my marriage ended a few years ago that suddenly domestic abuse was on the sex menu. I was like WTF?? No, you sick losers. That’s not passion, not intimacy, not love and it is definitely not what women with any self-respect are looking for.
[–]pinkmailboxesFDS Newbie58 points59 points60 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I know how you feel. I’m the same age as you. All the guys I’ve been with....wanted me to act like a pornstar. They wanted me to do 69, put my breasts between their dick, sucking on my knees, dirty talk,” etc. Unfortunately, I caved into doing all of these things.
[–]4BigDataFDS Newbie34 points35 points36 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
What's the solution? Should we just focus on relationships with women who help each other, men when/if we want to get pregnant?
[–]pinkmailboxesFDS Newbie69 points70 points71 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My solution is to stay single because I’m happier by myself than being gaslighted, manipulated, and abused whilst getting told that I’m the abuser...I’m so happy my ex broke up with me. I’m free and in a much safer place now 💕
[–]ponygalacticoFDS Newbie42 points43 points44 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m in
Women can be toxic, but even my worst wlw relation ended because she didn’t take me into account when accepting a job in another state, and she broke up with me in kind of an asshole way.
As opposed to my worst straight relationship, in which I had to break up with the dude after dragging him along for TOO MANY years, because he couldn’t finish school, get a job, take me on a date, answer messages, dress appropriately for the context, or give a fuck about anything other than sex/porn
I have sporadic contact with one of them, and it’s not the dude
[–]throwthisawayred315 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yep. all that energy i give to men cuz i can't help myself? redirect. to me. to my family. to my friends. (to my kids first, if i had any)
[–]man-in-trashFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think the solution is to keep your standards. There are men out there who are interested in a respectful relationship and there are men out there who believe they have to ask for or are expected to just do this stuff. One guy asked for anal and I just shot back “Why?” He had no answer for this. He ended up saying he thought that was what ‘everyone’ was doing. I asked if he genuinely thought that or if he’d seen it it in porn and just wanted to try it on. He mumbled something about porn and I said “You do know that shit isn’t real, right? Like it’s a movie, not real life?” I blocked him after that, but it might make him pause next time. He was a pretty nice guy all-around, just misled by a sick culture.
I know it’s not FDS to ‘teach’ men how to be better, but I do think it’s important to get the message out there that physical abuse in sex is not acceptable or mainstream and that many women don’t like it, don’t want it and are compromising their health and safety to give in to this stuff. It’s an issue that scares me a lot. Most pickme stuff I don’t care about and wouldn’t correct a guy for overstepping boundaries, I’d just block and move on, but I see this one issue as so dangerous and toxic for society, so directly associated with domestic abuse and violence, that I will always speak up about it when I draw the line with a man. While it’s not a subject I raise with other women, if a woman mentions something about ‘kinks’ in conversation, I absolutely tell them it’s unnatural, it’s normalizing violence against women and girls, it’s often downright dangerous, and that any man who expects it has no respect for her or her personal safety.
I have a daughter and do not want her growing up in a culture that tells her she has to allow herself to be beaten, choked or bound and raped to show a man she ‘loves’ him. It’s insane that we’re teaching kids in grade school about consent, holding boys accountable for their actions and that hurting or scaring girls in the playground is not how we show interest or love, and yet the same libfems talking up these things in schools are the ones defending pornsickness and horrifying concepts like CNC to women and adolescents experimenting with sex.
I was involved in a discussion a while ago with a bunch of women, mainly libfems, where one said she was so proud her 14yo son had come to her (single mom) to ask about where to get some material to jerk off to. The answers were horrifying and many were even illegal - suggestions to get him an OnlyFans account, show him how to access PornHub. It was a real WTAF moment for me. These supposedly intelligent, feminist women not only promoting porn but suggesting supplying it to a minor! Thank goodness one woman spoke up and pointed out it was illegal to supply porn to a child and suggested she give him a lingerie catalogue instead. Suddenly their woke collective were giggling and laughing about how silly laws like that were because it’s ‘natural’ for boys to seek this stuff out. Yes, incest and abuse porn are so normal 🙄.I was so completely disgusted. I hope none of their twisted sons come anywhere near my daughter.
From the playground to the bedroom, the two issues are sides of the same coin and our messaging about consent, respect, intimacy and love should be consistent from cradle to grave.
[–]riseaboveagainFDS Apprentice26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
I caved in, too. Before I had a reduction, I was very busty. Of course, both boyfriends thought boob sex was hot. Fact: it’s pretty boring for the woman, and I did not like having my boobs squished together - just another of the hundreds of porn misconceptions 🙄
[–]pinkmailboxesFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For real...it feels super awkward
[–]blerty567FDS Apprentice11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s a nightmare out there. Guys who want to shove wine bottles (the big part not the stem) into you. Guys who want threesomes. Guys who want anal. Guys who want to film sex. Guys who want you to film yourself having sex with someone else. And I use “want” but sometimes it’s “expect”
[–]man-in-trashFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wine bottles? WTF? That’s so twisted. The threesome thing is such a bore. Lots of women have experimented sexually or had a relationship or two with a woman, or identify as bisexual. That does NOT mean women want group sex. The two things are totally unrelated and it boggles the mind that men can’t work out how to use an iron or fry pan but they can invent a non-existent connection between bisexuality and group sex.
[–]amievenreal99FDS Apprentice64 points65 points66 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
if you tell them no, they just keep on pressuring you, hoping you give in. a lot of the sex i had before I found FDS was highly coercive.
Men are socialised to ignore and overstep women's boundaries.
[–]Aquamarine_eyesFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Women don't overstep mens boundaries because that can lead to abuse and death.
If men over step women's boundaries it can lead to further dependance on their control over us. In their mind - it's a risk that has great payoffs for them.
[–]khaleesiqwnFDS Newbie110 points111 points112 points 5 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
yep, same for a lot of dudes in their 30’s too
[–]Dontstopmenow2021FDS Newbie76 points77 points78 points 5 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
Ok, so I'm not the only one who went through the shock of discovering that such things existed...Before last year and my attempt at dating through OLD, none of my partners mentioned porn nor had a fetish for my butt. I can't tell if it's OLD that frees guys to do whatever they fancy (because you don't have mutual friends and see you mostly as a hookup) or the porn getting more extreme with time...or a mix of both.
[–]lollykpopsFDS Newbie99 points100 points101 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Oh god, so many of the men i meet seem to be pretty well adjusted....until I find out that they EXCLUSIVELY WANT HARDCORE ANAL SEX. I hate this new development and before fds allowed myself to be violated by multiple men who didn't even stop or slow down when it hurt...I'm convinced anal sex is used as a covert way to hurt women during sex and not be seen as a predator
[–]vardebiFDS Newbie66 points67 points68 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm convinced anal sex is used as a covert way to hurt women during sex and not be seen as a predator
1000%!!! And if it hurts it's my fault because I can't "relax enough"... smfh
[–]lollykpopsFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I feel u sis
[–]amievenreal99FDS Apprentice65 points66 points67 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
until I find out that they EXCLUSIVELY WANT HARDCORE ANAL SEX.
Degenerates.
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I always turn it around on them. If they want anal sex, then I should get to peg them with the same ferocity and glee that they have about hurting me. If they complain, I go 'hey you wanted 50/50 right? Well that means I get to abuse you if you want to abuse me.' For the vast majority of men that's pretty final and they're gone lol (Says a lot about their reasons for wanting anal in the first place imho, even though men are built for it and women are not).
I've had one who didn't react with immediate disgust and fear. I just blocked him.
[–]blerty567FDS Apprentice9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol funny sorry, at one point my sadistic ex came back asking if I’d want to have anal sex with him!! How delusional can you get? Why would I want to all of a sudden have sex with someone who abused me years ago, in a way that doesn’t provide ANY pleasure for me?? WHY? They’re delusional
[–]throwthisawayred333 points34 points35 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
my sex policy is this:
if you want it, you've got to experience it FIRST.
want anal? you get to experience a strap on before we even DISCUSS ME doing it.
want to cum in my mouth? you get to eat your own cum first.
or even a regular blowjob? this strap-on's multipurpose baby!
fair is fair.
[–]khaleesiqwnFDS Newbie77 points78 points79 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Ya idk, like all of them seem to be obsessed with s&m/brutal sex and anal, and it’s exactly what you said, they’re super persistent about it too. It’s sick. I do think it has a lot to do with porn, and how it’s progressively gotten more and more brutal over the years.
[–]faux_naturaleFDS Newbie92 points93 points94 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
The obsession with anal is so bizarre. Like, I have an elastic, per-lubricated orifice that isn’t full of shit, literally two inches away from there! Maybe try that one?
[–][deleted] 62 points63 points64 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's because you don't want to that they want to. They want to "convince" you and be so amazing that they "make" you like it. Its a bit twisted.
[–]riseaboveagainFDS Apprentice29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly this. They’ve watched so much porn, that they think a woman’s anus is just a second vagina to pound away upon. They have no conception of what goes on in real life. Hello? That’s where shit comes from, it requires a ton of prep, and most women don’t LUV it like porn. YUCK.
[–]KaisaIlonaFDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's a dominance thing. They want you to do something that makes you uncomfortable for their pleasure.
[–]drunkmoonfarmerFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's specifically because they want to humiliate and degrade women and they get off on making them uncomfortable.
[–][deleted] 64 points65 points66 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
And THIS is why the “just get consent” message is wrong. It ignores the sexual pressure from media and porn that young women grow up with. I can’t believe at 19 you are asked to do those things. Please stick to your guns and tell other women to find their way over here as well.
[–]throwthisawayred321 points22 points23 points 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
And THIS is why the “just get consent” message is wrong. It ignores the sexual pressure from media and porn that young women grow up with.
THANK YOU. i've been yelling at libfems about this for YEARS. but no no, we're all over 18 so everything's automatically FINE
personally, i've resisted in dubious situations cuz i wasn't sure, KNOWING that i had a lot of de-programming to do. ie i wasn't sure of MYSELF and my ability to adequately consent. i listened to my gut on that one.
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The fact that LibFems say shit like “well girls like playing with Barbies because they have been socially conditioned to be like that” while also ignoring the effects of media on our sexual choices is just......bizarre. So little girls play with Barbies because that is seen as socially desirable and yet when those same girls grown into teenagers and start to have casual sex/hookups that is 100% their own choice and not at all influenced by media, porn, and the pressure to be ‘chill’? Ok 🙄
[–]Aquamarine_eyesFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Dr Gail Dines talks alot about how women are groomed by pop culture, and how men are groomed by Porn culture. Then the two meet and BOOM disaster and abuse ensues.
Pop Culture teaches women to be compliant fuck dolls, porn culture grooms men to be entitled to compliant fuck dolls.
Then society degenerates.
[–]throwthisawayred35 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
absolutely. it's a horrible combo.
[–]amievenreal99FDS Apprentice93 points94 points95 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
"porn sick"
"complete slob who doesn't take care of himself, doesn't shower, doesn't groom, wears the same oversized stained sloppy tee 10 days in a row"
"has a profile full of 18+, BDSM, gonewild and similar subreddits"
"oversteps boundaries deliberately to provoke you, or questions your boundaries and pushes you; proceeds to mansplain your boundaries to you"
"Doesn't take a No for an answer and disrespects your boundaries and when you tell him this is the last time he's disrespecting you like that and ignoring your clear 'No', he acts all ignorant and 'how was I supposed to mind read your boundaries"
"is into some degenerate shit and gets off of abuse, humiliation, pedophilia, mutilation"
You will hear all sorts of fairytales about "what men truly want is to get a woman's approval, and they work hard to make her smile". In reality, the only thing they work hard towards is going out of their way to provoke you, overstep your boundaries and push you into cutting them off, and sabotage themselves, just so they can blame women, it's hilarious. They are really mentally ill. They literally get erect for upsetting us, then gaslighting us into "I can't mind read", or "You should just communicate".
Just look at r/relationship_advice really. Or join any OLD site and see for yourselves.
[–]brylm92FDS Newbie235 points236 points237 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
"Pornsick" should be somewhere lurking in the shadows
[–]m00n5t0n3FDS Newbie110 points111 points112 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Plot twist, that's all of them
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie36 points37 points38 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. 😣
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points 5 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
“Sleeps around” is way, way more common than I thought.. and honestly, it’s sort of scary to me. This guy I liked mentioned that he had a LOT of experience, and that he’s slept with a few virgins too.. but he loves pleasing women sexually (🤢)... I’m over here being inexperienced af and thinking.. ohhh great, so I should be falling for this I guess? Hard freaking pass.
One thing I’ve learned from fds is that men shouldn’t be praised for doing the bare minimum... also, to me, it just seems wrong to mention you’ve slept with a few virgins before. Am I wrong?? He was older too... it just felt off.
[–]LuckyCharmsLassFDS Newbie42 points43 points44 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, it was off. Rule #1, Trust your instincts. I will tell you two things: in my 65 years, my instincts have never been wrong. I only got in trouble when I ignored them, because charming, cute, sexy, handsome.... and I did that enough to have sexual fun but bruised emotions, and in the past few years, real bruises. I have noticed men have gotten way more dangerous, I too blame porn. It's very sad.
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Likes pleasing women sexually" and "has slept with more than one virgin" (as in, losing your virginity together) rarely goes together. Of course a virgin thinks you're good in bed, what do they have to compare to?
[–]4BigDataFDS Newbie22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Only thing he's offering is a bunch of STDs. Who wants that?
[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah that's a huge red flag. I went on one "walk date" (pre FDS) with a guy who was clearly a total narcissist and he went on a similar rant about how experienced he was, and how much sex he had when he was younger. Like....gross??? When I sent him a thanks but I'm not interested but best of luck message after (again pre FDS, wouldn't do that now), he sent me a massive text of several paragraphs telling me all the things that were "wrong" with me 🙄🤡
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh gosh.. ew. Damn, that’s horrible. Honestly, I wouldn’t be so pissed except that this guy seemed like a pretty amazing person, and then he just goes off on a tangent about how he slept with all these women and his sex life was amazing when he was younger. I’m like... excuse me? So.. how am I (a virgin) supposed to take that?? NO THANK YOU, I’m not interested in being one of lord knows how many. Someone else can be the next notch in your pole, because I am not going to put myself through your immaturity. Forever playboys piss me off soo much. Also, I feel like sometimes there’s pressure to be the “last” woman for these assholes, and I just don’t think that struggle is worth it AT ALL #fakehvm
[–]throwthisawayred310 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I could've wrote what you just said. Exact same situation.
I listened to my gut, though it was really hard cuz he was so handsome lol
He was older too... it just felt off.
Yep. Run run run away
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah.. he was completely my type, it just didn’t sit well at all what he said about his sexual past. Wealthy too lol, but honestly, he turned out to be horribly jaded and cruel... no matter how much I fell in love with him, it wouldn’t have been enough.. I’m sooo happy that I never slept with him.. even still though, he hurt me so much. I think he broke my heart
[–]throwthisawayred37 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
he turned out to be horribly jaded and cruel
wow. what'd he do to you? feel free to PM me. that shit sucks, i know; i was in a similar situation.
[–]PyroKittyOwOAt-Risk Pick Me Youth163 points164 points165 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It would be funny if it weren't so true. 😭 Then you have the guys that go "wOw ThAt'S sO sHaLlOw Of YoU tO hAvE sTaNdArDs" then of course they get all pissy about body type/career/hobbies/attractiveness. Like WHAT??? The absolute audacity.
[–]notfromthesea44 points45 points46 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"wOw ThAt'S sO sHaLlOw Of YoU tO hAvE sTaNdArDs" Is the best phrase I've heard all week lol. What a great way to put it!
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice108 points109 points110 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
oh wow. why does this apply so well to my life? I swear... almost all guys on OLD have something along those lines. And what is terrible is that a problem never comes alone. It's sometimes 3 or 4 pairs of those: can't spell, "send nudes", bad credit score, insecure... you see, it's never just one. that's like a unicorn.
[–]shipintheskyFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Because individual problems stem from an underlying issue: shitty mindset (entitlement+ misogyny+lack of true self love)
[–]laserkatzeFDS Newbie51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
come on girl just because he’s a broke drug dealer without a job you shouldn’t deny him the pussy. you’re so superficial /s
"Your standards are way too high" 🙄
[–]KristeninmyskinFDS Apprentice43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Cheap, controlling, gaslights, negs, follow a lot of Instagram models, pays for OnlyFans...
[–][deleted] 23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Okay but seriously whats with the religious following of IG models? One of my exs would follow obvious bot & spam accounts.
[–]mushy_teabagFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Fantasy, want you can’t have
[–]Aik2FDS Newbie66 points67 points68 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Big facts. Add disappointing in the sack and call it done
[–][deleted] 31 points32 points33 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This meme is wrong about one thing. No one uses the word DATE anymore. It's "netflix and chill", "hangout", and "talking to". DATE requires effort.
[–]ekkokekekkoFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
"Date" suggests *shudder* commitment, as opposed to "just seeing where this goes".
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Not even commitment YET, just a mutal agremment that commitment is the goal. And THAT is too much for some people.
[–]MissKinkykittykatFDS Newbie111 points112 points113 points 5 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
This is the bain of my fucking life.
Everyone in my workplace brings up my relationship status on an almost weekly basis. Analysing the reason and mocking my preferences.
I'm a gainfully employed higher educated woman that took the first opportunity to move out and learn to drive. I have my own home and two cars.
Intensive effort is put into my appearance - work out daily, mircoblading, eyelashes, nails, expensive skincare regime, luxury makeup and clothes that really compliment my figure. I'm conventionally attractive.
When I express that I want a gentleman that has similar achievements and care in their appearance, I'm labelled a golddigger, materialistic, and shallow.
My last relationship was with an incredibly handsome Italian rugby player. The one before was an immensely educated and good-looking engineer. I'm not downgrading to make men feel better about their failure at basic life goals. I'm happy being single when the other option is mothering an adult man.
[–]i_said_what_i_said_FDS Apprentice38 points39 points40 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh yes, if I explain I want someone who is simply my equal (in terms of professional level, appearance and vales) I get told yOuR sTaNdArDs ArE tOo HiGh
[–]lilac2481FDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Don't your coworkers have anything else to do??? Maybe they are jealous of you.
[–]MissKinkykittykatFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The men are usually attempting to play matchmaker for their friends. Friends that are clearly single for a reason.
I feel plenty of the women simply want me to experience their misery with lousy partners. Unfortunately I've been there before but I've definitely learned from my mistakes.
[–]lilac2481FDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. Maybe they don't like that you're happy and have standards. I've never dated, but I certainly wouldn't want a man-child either. I have standards as well.
[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I love this Queenly response. I’m glad you’ve never lowered your standards sis. This was inspiring to read💞
[–]MissKinkykittykatFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you!
Unfortunately, I started my dating life listening to the many cries of 'Come on, give him a chance. He's such a nice guy!' Never again.
[–]tiavargaFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
“you are too picky” “You can teach him how to dress” “Men aren’t like women, you have to help them”
So.damn.tired of being told I have to build-a-man to have a relationship.
[–]ekkokekekkoFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For fuck sakes. SAME. WHY THE FUCK ARE MEN ALLOWED TO BE BABIES FOR LIFE?
I'm in the final stages of my divorce and my ex was asking how to file this thing or get that thing, and I just sighed at him, "Talk to __ person and tell them you're getting a divorce and they'll tell you what paperwork you need. I haven't done this before either." Like, for the love of God, we've been apart for a year, he moved in with his new GF before he and I actually split up, and he STILL can't handle his own shit. I can't wait to be finished with this process and happily carry on with my life without another man around helplessly asking me to do more free labor on his stupid behalf.
If I DO ever date again, the man must, at the minimum, be a functional adult. And since I've yet to meet a single man who IS a functional adult with a clean home, good finances, interesting hobbies, and a full self-sustained social life, I'm happily going to die alone.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (24 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]YgirlYBFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Hermione knew what was up 😁
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
If she knew what was up why the hell did she get with Ron?
[–]AnneRB13FDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Because the epilogue was worse than awful
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I cringed
[–]YgirlYBFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I knooow... So mismatched
[–]throwthisawayred310 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
she really should've gotten with Krum
[–]Dontstopmenow2021FDS Newbie38 points39 points40 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
has the emotional range of a tea spoon
haha I never thought of the emotional range of a tea spoon...so are we like.. a tablespoon? 🤔
[–]man-in-trashFDS Newbie41 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My cup runneth over.
[–]Dontstopmenow2021FDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hear it in Oprah's voice :)
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Emotionally jaded.. that one hurts a lot too. Lol and it’s hard not to want to change that 😕
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, there is a part of you that thinks you will be SPECIAL if you wake something up in him .... I am healer/empath type and it is SO HARD .... but I'm not doing it ever again. You can't fix someone who doesn't WANT to be fixed. My last ex wasn't even a bad person (my first was, he did a number on my head), but he had just made the pain his identity and didn't know who he would be without it. I told him that was part of his problem a few days ago when he gave me my key back and we did the breakup dance of exchanging the things we had left at each other's houses. He said "it boils down to that you grow, and I don't." I told him he was choosing to be that way and I had tried to show him how. It's fucking hard, when you see good things in someone, but DON'T DO IT. It's not your job to be someone's spiritual midwife. If they want to grow, they will.
[–]DallasOMalleyFDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
"Spiritual midwife" is the perfect name for it.
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've tried. There is something that makes you feel really special when you are the one to open someone's crown chakra. I just can't do it anymore, not for lovers. I won't ever date someone outside my own spiritual community again. Which, we have our own problems and I will still Have standards- but having the same worldview is ths very first one. Christians have the concept of being equally or unequally yoked, and it's the perfect way to describe tying yourself to someone who going on a whole different lifepath than you. I won't sacrifice my spiritual calling for anyone ever again.
[–]throwthisawayred36 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's fucking hard, when you see good things in someone, but DON'T DO IT. It's not your job to be someone's spiritual midwife. If they want to grow, they will.
lessons painfully learned
[–]lollykpopsFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Spiritual midwife" is incredible, thanks for sharing.
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for this. I’m really an empath type too, and it hurts so, so much when you see so much beauty in someone that they just can’t see. But.. I can’t convince someone he’s worth loving.. And no matter how much I try to guilt myself into it, it’s not my job.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Been there .... they end up resenting you for holding them back eventually. OR they are sooooo convinced that they are unworthy that they start to treat you badly/devalue you/think there MUST be something wrong with you for wanting to be with them. Only the unattainable is worth it. "Wouldn't want to join a club that would have me as a member" syndrome.
[–]everythingandloveFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
This defines it perfectly, especially the second part! I’ve always been wrong about men; no matter how much they talk about being pursued, there’s just something in them that won’t allow it, and the truth is that they have to choose you themselves.
Only the unattainable is worth it.
It’s so hard though, because I have a part of myself that is so full of love, I just want to give it to someone, and at last I think I found that person: me.
[–]chinchaslythFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Omg you just described the guy I was in love with for 2 years 🤣
[–]hakunnamatatamfsFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Guuurl 😂
[–]chinchaslythFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Vowed he is my last like that. And I’m sticking to my word. I know (and he knows and has admitted) that I deserve better.
[–]asocialsocialiteFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Put down out-of-shape and Trump supporting and you've got me.
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The ultimate yikes 😳
[–]asocialsocialiteFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, I'm visiting my grandparents who live close to Indiana and the men on Tinder are next level trash.
[–]Davina33FDS Disciple16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup!
[–]husheveryoneFDS Apprentice15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
“I’ve been busy.”
NOPE! Bye.
[–]4BigDataFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
What's the best FDS answer to "not looking for anything serious"?
[–]BellaBadBFDS Newbie25 points26 points27 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
None, block and delete
[–]InevitableHulkFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The best answer is no answer. Block and delete.
Exactly.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Im so dead lol. So true.
[–]inlovewithaloserFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Being approached by these guys is starting to look no different than being approached by the crackheads at the gas station. 🤢👉👈
[–]Party-Promise-8840FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🤣🤣🤣
[–]LCM75360FDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is horribly and hilariously accurate!
[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I was asked this two days ago, if only I had this image earlier to summarize why I am still single.
[–]bananamilk58FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm always wondering how they have the audacity to even think I'd ever be interested in their LV asses...I just
[–]foxfaebaeFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Lol waiittttt there are guys trying to date me?!? I'm just looking into a vast empty field 🤣🤣🤣
Maybe you're on a field date 😂
[–]foxfaebaeFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol!!!!
[–]ekkokekekkoFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Since getting into therapy and FDS a couple months ago, the sheer volume of weirdos and losers I was attracting has gone from massive to zero. And I love it - lately I get nothing but sweet compliments from ladies, and from guys I'm either getting ignored (excellent) or actual respect (even better). I wonder if there's some kind of "PickMe" vibe we give off when we're vulnerable. Ugh, it sounds a bit like victim blaming, but has anyone noticed anything similar after they have a mindset change?
[–]PoggersismsFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
LVM: “Why are you a virgin?”
Me:.....
What fact they even ask.....
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is the funniest thing I've ever seen 😂
[–]mushy_teabagFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Missing but “looking for a third”
[–]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
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