If you knowingly enter a superficial relationship you don’t deserve sympathy when it goes south!

PMmeareasontolive · 2024-10-15T23:34:45+00:00

You can have sympathy for the dude for relationship ending and also not blame the woman. These aren't completely polarized things.

Savings-Bee-4993 · 2024-10-15T23:35:29+00:00

No, she’s not “in the right.”

He should have seen it coming, but that doesn’t make her behavior good, right, cool, or praiseworthy. She’s still a gold digger.

Just because someone tells you they’re a shitty person doesn’t mean that what they do to you is fine or okay, even though the guy was being retarded marrying her.

SmokeySunDrops · 2024-10-15T23:34:45+00:00

I hope he got a prenup

TheNattyJew · 2024-10-16T00:39:39+00:00

I seriously doubt that she told the man that she was in it purely for the money

False-Purple3882 · 2024-10-16T02:58:29+00:00

Men will date and marry women exclusively for their appearance all day long. But suddenly it’s a problem when women expect some form of benefit from being in a relationship. It’s just their hypocrisy again.

Throwaway26702008 · 2024-10-16T14:24:47+00:00

“If we date I’m gonna hurt you”

“Dates”

kills

“She’s in the right, she told him, no prison time”.

John_Oakman · 2024-10-15T23:50:43+00:00

A person wakes up a different person every day. People change and grow, and sometimes they may regret their past decisions.

apresonly · 2024-10-16T00:01:09+00:00

What is the line between superficial and not?

Most men would dump their partner if they lost their sex drive.

SOwED · 2024-10-16T00:42:47+00:00

lmao this is a debate subreddit, why would you come here with the coldest of takes?

XOTrashKitten · 2024-10-16T05:11:40+00:00

It's not like this man married for her looks right?

Hoopy223 · 2024-10-16T00:19:04+00:00

I’ve a hard time believing her statement about “honest gold digger” especially when it’s coming from one side only. Doubt she was the honest gold digger throughout their relationship however long it was.

Tbh a man can do all sorts of dumb stuff in a relationship, just don’t go broke.

Rocketskate69 · 2024-10-16T01:19:59+00:00

It’s no surprise. Shitty people exist. Shitty people have relationships with shitty people. He probably agreed to her being a gold digger because she’s hot or sex or both or who knows.

The relationship was built on an agreement not each other. It happens.

XOTrashKitten · 2024-10-16T05:13:03+00:00

And some men leave when women get fat/sick, sooo

HighValueWomanBook · 2024-10-16T01:00:59+00:00

I mean, what is the point of this post? A woman divorced a man, which happens ~80% in divorces. Women leave men for money, no money, more money, bad sex, good sex, too sick, etc. Everyone knows this.

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southwestheat · 2024-10-16T00:34:39+00:00

All relationships where both people are genuinely enthused (i.e. not arranged) begin mostly superficially. That superficiality either evolves into something of substance or you break-up.

(Superficial = money, looks, etc. Non-superficial = admiring the other's virtues, character, etc.)

serpensmercurialis · 2024-10-16T00:40:24+00:00

I think it depends. If he honored his side as best as he could and was making good faith efforts to rebuild, compensate, or compromise, then it does seem somewhat callous, especially if whatever it was wasn’t his fault and was somewhat temporary (months to a couple years). Just because you’re marrying someone for money doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care about them or see them through hardships. If they’re not somebody you would want to do at least that with, then you probably shouldn’t even marry them in the first place.

S0yslut · 2024-10-16T04:13:30+00:00

Being openly a bad person doesn’t put you in the right.. I won’t overly sympathize with people who could/should have known better unless they have a room temperature IQ.

SamuraiGoblin · 2024-10-16T07:43:32+00:00

I very much doubt the video added his perspective, so you only have her word when she says she was up front about her intentions. I don't think many gold-diggers state up front they are only in it for the money and will leave if the money stops flowing. Maybe they do, what do I know?

Bad things can happen in life. People can lose their jobs or get sick. The point of a relationship is that you weather the storms together. However, if she explicitly stated, "I am ONLY with you for your money and will leave the same day that you lose your job or your health," then he would be the idiot to agree to that. Somehow though, I doubt that discussion was had.

She may be telling the truth but it's important for everyone to remain somewhat critical when hearing only one version. You don't seem to hold that barrier to belief as you seem to accept her story as the gospel truth of the situation.

But if (and that's a very big if) she is telling the truth, then I would agree with you. Consenting adults can enter whatever agreement they want, as long as they are fully informed of the details.

Fichek · 2024-10-16T11:30:07+00:00

The same goes for women entering into relationships with abusers who end up abusing them, right?

bluestjuice · 2024-10-16T12:08:43+00:00

I don’t have time to watch the clip, but a few thoughts:

a lot hangs here on how transparently this was all communicated. It’s difficult for us as outsiders to know.
it’s possible and probably desirable to extend sympathy to others when they experience troubles, even if those troubles were self-inflicted or evidently likely outcomes. We don’t even have to withhold judgment necessarily; you can say, “it seemed like it was going to go that way. I can see you’re real hurt about it, and that sucks.”

FebruaryEightyNine · 2024-10-16T12:54:25+00:00

If a guy openly said in the opening courtship stages that he expected his wife not to be fat and then he left her when she had a baby and gained weight, you would not be saying its her fault for dating a man like him in the first place. And rightly so.

But thanks for the insight, because this is what I say about a lot of women who post on this sub and why I honestly feel a lot of you are as repugnant as the redpillers you complain about. Redpill is morally ambiguous, but often many of its adherents operate by rather bizarre moral codes of conduct. Many of those who rally against it, claim to be on the moral highground...but often use apparent moral high ground to justify all kinds of shitty behaviours. And I notice the same with leftists/mainstream left leaning discourse. There is this absolutely bizarre idea that being on the "right"/"oppressed" side of an argument somehow affords you the right to behave in any way you see fit. Its really laughable.

Honestly, I dislike redpillers but I am getting annoyed at the increasingly shitty, self pitying and hypocritical takes from the (mostly american) women posting on this sub.

AntiHypergamist · 2024-10-16T13:05:16+00:00

well then women don't deserve sympathy when they get cheated on by the hot guy who got bored of her.

BackgroundHuman4188 · 2024-10-16T13:22:09+00:00

I’ve kinda noticed that most women WANT you to the enter a relationship causally. It’s very very hard to get anything going without the ‘let’s have sex almost immediately and see where it goes nonsense’. There’s not many relationship opportunities when you do things differently I’ve felt.

DeathcoreOnly · 2024-10-16T14:05:53+00:00

If a man left a woman who got fat and went on to do an interview bragging about it, you’d be foaming at the mouth angry, as would all these women in the comments so let’s maybe tone down the vitriol here

NefariousnessMost660 · 2024-10-16T15:08:25+00:00

No arguments here. What you give is what you get.

Updawg145 · 2024-10-16T20:21:07+00:00

The problem with this logic is it's anti-social at its core because people can never be trusted to genuinely look out for the well-being of other people, even when they themselves are their own enemy.

I knew a girl who was happy to entertain simps because in her mind they were doing it to themselves. The problem is if you were a true friend to these people and truly cared about them, you wouldn't allow them to act stupidly and trip over themselves, allowing their attraction to get the better of their rationality. Usually in these situations the woman is very much in control and fully aware of what's happening, and she simply allows the man to blunder into these friendzone or gold digger relationships with false hope.

Again that's a fundamentally anti-social way to view other human beings, especially those you're engaging with on a personal/intimate level. That said men also do this plenty to women as well, stringing them along and using them for sex, knowing the girl is hoping it will lead to a serious relationship when it won't. We have a culture-wide problem with treating each other like disposable assets and not like people we care about.

Innocent_boi_77 · 2024-10-16T03:25:16+00:00

Agree, if woman dates only tall, handsome and rich men. I have no sympathy when they get abused in any way. In most cases red flags are obvious so yeah they deserve it. Right?

TallFoundation7635 · 2024-10-16T18:40:43+00:00

Most women are not honest about being gold diggers.

nightcall379 · 2024-10-15T23:53:07+00:00

she was honest from the beginning that she was essentially a gold digger

Implying there are women that aren't

Immediate_Wasabi_920 · 2024-10-15T23:40:43+00:00

Leonardo DiCaprio likes women under 25. He has heart broken many women when they have turned 25. They knew this about him, but still got heart broken. I bet you would be quick to put Leo in the wrong in a heartbeat.

untamed-italian · 2024-10-16T00:49:26+00:00

If you knowingly enter a superficial relationship you don’t deserve sympathy when it goes south

Nobody does this.

I just saw a video of a woman talking about how she left her husband when he was no longer rich. The interesting part is that she was honest from the beginning

Lol, and you believe her? Hahahaha

When the women you have made 'friends' tell others that they were honest about ruthlessly using you, and others believe them over you, by your own logic you wouldn't deserve any sympathy either.

But I'd still sympathize if you acknowledged your error of judgement. Everyone deserves some compassion for making mistakes.

If she was honest from the beginning that she wanted financial security throughout the marriage and he agreed to that what did they expect to happen.

Wait, you think a woman (who usually cannot stay employed and sane while pregnant through no fault of their own) who wants financial security and asks for it - you think that is sufficient to being honest about being a shameless gold digger?

Lol, no.

Throwaway4CMVtho · 2024-10-16T03:03:11+00:00

Why women deserve less

Title	If you knowingly enter a superficial relationship you don’t deserve sympathy when it goes south!
Author	Positive-Emu-1836
Upvotes	36
Comments	162
Date	October 15, 2024 11:24 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1g4lh7e/if_you_knowingly_enter_a_superficial_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-you-knowingly-enter-a-superficial-relationship.1533123 https://theredarchive.com/post/1533123

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