Men that push for 50/50 still don’t realize that dating has become a ladies’ market in 2021, with Tinder being 78% male / 22% female and Bumble & Hinge being 65% male / 35% female. Men outnumber women 4-to-1 on Tinder and 3-to-1 on Bumble/Hinge.

uwillneverfindmeirl · 2021-12-23T09:12:15+00:00

Also, supply and demand. It ain’t our fault that men are desperate for sex and companionship more than women

Outcast36485962 · 2021-12-23T13:50:06+00:00

Umm YES because if a man initiates and a woman isn’t interested, she rejects him and they both move on.

A woman initiates and a man isn’t interested, he’ll string her along, push her to have sex with him, pretend he wants a relationship and then ghost after he gets what he wants, leaving her broken hearted while he couldn’t care less.

So yeah, we don’t initiate…

souredskittles · 2021-12-23T06:30:51+00:00

Not to mention those numbers are inflated by bots, SWs, and inactive women, the real percentage is a lot lower. When you impose things like 50/50, you greatly raise the risk for women to engage with any given man. I knew they would have a harder time with women when they started to not pay fully for date. 🤷‍♂️

I’ve noticed men have tried to engage irl more often post covid.

scorchedsouI · 2021-12-23T07:09:21+00:00

Yes, the sex that does all the work in reproduction and takes far more risks in every conceivable way has greater value and will expect to be pursued. This is common sense.

Specific-Composer300 · 2021-12-23T13:05:09+00:00

Why are men nowadays such lazy, entitled losers. Men initiating everything was the norm until a couple decades ago.

Timely_Fox_6191 · 2021-12-23T06:46:17+00:00

Thanks to years of pickmeism men started thinking it was them who ought to be wooed. During covid, said pickmeishas probably grew a backbone and left their bum boyfriends so now there's alot of uncapable, single men available.

Serious_Papaya8615 · 2021-12-23T09:48:38+00:00

After the countless examples I’ve seen of men having vile intentions despite acting so well to gain a woman’s trust, only to later reveal that all he wanted was to use her for sex, or all the shit like “am I the only one who thinks of other women’s bodies while having sex with my gf”, I can with 100% accuracy confirm that I will never be caught dead pursuing a man.

Buggy1218 · 2021-12-23T12:26:32+00:00

These men are so lazy lol. They act like the rest of their natural lives will be spent chasing this one woman. Things even out once you’re in an established relationship.

Put a little fucking effort in, is that so hard? Would y’all expect Megan Fox to chase you? I don’t think so. The bare minimum effort you can do for a woman you’re genuinely interested in is take the initiative.

I never initiated any dates with my husband and never texted him first. If anything, I downplayed my interest in him until I knew him better. And guess what- he asked me to marry him.

This is how courting works. Just say you’re only interested in sex and move the fuck on.

Platipus6 · 2021-12-23T06:19:51+00:00

Sir, you get one match a month. Be grateful.

CakeSprinklesUnicorn · 2021-12-23T06:17:09+00:00

It’s funny that men still think women should go 50/50 and/or take the initiative… since they don’t seem to realize the overwhelming surplus of men on the apps means that women currently have the pick of the litter.

The man who made the Reddit post is butthurt that “women don’t take enough initiative,” but he doesn’t seem to realize that he is totally replaceable, and that there are more than enough other men on the apps willing to initiate and take over his spot.

Tinder: 78% male, 22% female.

Bumble: 65% male, 35% female.

Hinge: 65% male, 35% female.

It’s a buyer’s market for women.

Obviously OLD still has a lot of LVM/NVM, so as always, keep vetting, ladies.

Source:

Tinder Statistics: https://datingzest.com/tinder-statistics/

Bumble Statistics: https://boostmatches.com/bumble-statistics/#Number_of_People_who_used_Bumble_at_least_once

Hinge Statistics: https://en.lab.appa.pe/2020-02/which-dating-apps-are-reigning-in-the-usa.html

riseaboveagain · 2021-12-23T15:34:08+00:00

This reminds me of that old saying, “The odds are good, but the goods are odd” lol

ConfusedBisexual1992 · 2021-12-23T11:51:46+00:00

None of the men on dating apps are worth pursuing anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️

ItsFreezen · 2021-12-23T12:59:17+00:00

The astronomical amount of Scrotes who hate women and pretend to be straight. And Scrotes think your desperate if you initiate, why take the chance.

Sewud · 2021-12-23T09:49:33+00:00

Yes I also think that it makes sense for men to pay more, not even because of differences between genders, but simply because it's a free market and there's more demand for women. If the situation was reversed and women craved men more than the opposite, women could pay. But it's not the case. Every time I was with a guy it was him who wanted to be with me more than the opposite. Yet they expected me to make sacrifices towards giving them what they want just out of the goodness of my heart? That's not the right dynamic. Guy getting what he wants and girl being kind enough to do everything possible to get him what he wants just because she's nice and she tries to make others happy? Nah. Guys should be extra nice to the woman they're dating and women can keep their niceness for the rest of the world.

aoi4eg · 2021-12-23T11:15:23+00:00

Guys, who think like this, have one common problem: unfortunately, no woman ever was interested in them, so they have no idea what it looks like. They read some pick-up books and think all the women have the same attitude and never-ever make first moves, when in reality, if we're interested, we're definitely not gonna sit with arms crossed and lips pursed, pretending to have zero attraction.

OrangeyPanda · 2021-12-23T14:59:44+00:00

Exactly. Even if I like a man I won't ask him out because I have no issues being single and don't have any desire to go into of my way not to be single. If he were to ask me out then I might accept, but men just don't have the capacity to understand that women just aren't desperate to date or sleep with men, so why would we ask them out? Because they want us to? Lazy bums.

misandryisnotreal · 2021-12-23T12:59:34+00:00

Don’t these males and their logical male brains understand how supply and demand work?

lolmemberberries · 2021-12-23T15:42:57+00:00

One thing men need to get when it comes to dating: Women are the ones who choose. If you want to be chosen, you have to take initiative. Dazzle me or get left in the dust.

This guy needs to realize, what he won't do someone else will. When I was on OLD, I never initiated with men. Why? I was too busy vetting the men who initiated contact with me. I didn't have the time or inclination to entertain the men who didn't talk to me.

Sunshine_Daisies2525 · 2021-12-23T15:31:16+00:00

This is partly because women who are unavailable (unemployed, unhealthy, or LV in any way), have shame and take themselves off the market, while men have no shame. Little twigs with zero muscle mass and guys who don’t know how to take pictures going for models, etc. Swiping through any dating site as a woman is sad, but I’ve swiped for male friends and been low-key jealous of how 90% of the women were presentable and had nice-looking profiles.

masterofthebarkarts · 2021-12-23T14:20:02+00:00

I mean, to an extent I understand the sentiment: if someone literally never texted first I would assume they were only talking to me out of convenience. But that's after I've gotten to know them - there should be balance in a relationship.

In this case I suspect he means: why don't these girls on Tinder pursue me more? And honey it's because they have 1000 men who are more interesting pursuing them. They don't need to pursue you.

languishinghetero · 2021-12-23T08:31:29+00:00

It is not my job to prove my worth and chase a man. If he never texts me/calls me and we never meet or speak again and I am fine with it. I think it is hilarious that men think we don't understand supply and demand.

frustratedmarxistfem · 2021-12-23T22:52:31+00:00

And both are inflated for opposite reasons. There are more real men because many are actually taken or married. There are less women than reported because many are bots, clout chasers, and sex workers not actually looking for a date.

DuchessDurag · 2021-12-23T20:51:33+00:00

What gets me is with the ratios in favour of women, why are the men on those dating apps not making a effort to stand out or pursue women? What’s the point in matching with a woman and liking her photos and a man says nothing ?

It seems like a lot of men say the same things on their profile and don’t bother with physical appearance either.

pozzalovah · 2021-12-24T20:40:33+00:00

Random thought ,but i have noticed that men don't initiate anything anymore .its sad .

seraphinelysion · 2021-12-23T18:39:51+00:00

Women are expected to do everything else, so the least men can do is initiate everything in the beginning. Look at it this way: men want a free mommy-nurse-bang-maid. Men have to convince us HARD that they are worth it. Otherwise, women are perfectly content to be single and unbothered.

ceramicunicorn · 2021-12-23T18:45:22+00:00

And that probably doesn’t even account for how many of those female accounts are fake.

I have authority to speak on this, as someone who worked in entertainment and faced fierce competition in a saturated market for years. I did not (ahem, usually) tolerate blatant sexual exploitation, and I had standards. And that’s ok! But never did I stamp my little foot and demand that casting agencies come calling and pursue me and make the first move. If they did, I was grateful. Never did I feel entitled to bookings. Never did I figure I could kick back and relax and do the bare minimum if I did book a gig. I paid attention to market dynamics and adjusted my strategies and worked harder. Sometimes, I had to pay for a slot (or promise guest sales). When you start to become burned out/resentful of a seemingly impenetrable (ha, no pun intended) marketplace- and I get it, it happens- you take a break, get out entirely, or make your peace with doing independent work.

And yes, this emotional rollercoaster IS comparable to dating, because artists deeply crave creative work (only the wealthy do this work without loving it), much as men deeply crave the comfort, sex, and validation received from women.

Good Lord men, if you don’t like the marketplace dynamics, change your strategy or leave the marketplace. This is such basic, basic stuff. There are things men could do, like being more mindful of sexual obsession (in the way that many are about diet and exercise!), which colors interactions and drives women off the platforms. Be more selective about who you have sex with, so the marketplace isn’t flooded with indiscriminate penises. Make it an enticing place to be for the women you want to meet there.

“No, I’m going to double down and insist it just magically transform for my benefit.” Ok, bud. And I’d love it if a man walked up to me and handed me 100K. That’s not the way it works.

I think it helps in some ways that women simply refuse casual sex in order to shift norms (and therefore expectations), but there are always going to be men who want to nag and bitch and not put in the work. Just let them fail and be mad.

fogplum · 2021-12-23T19:06:45+00:00

If a guy genuinely likes you, you won't even get the chance to initiate anything. Because he'll always be reaching out to you and planning dates, trying to get more of your attention and time.

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