Would you see it as creepy if a 40 year old kept approaching girls in their 20s or 30s in clubs?

Shibenaut · 2024-02-17T13:08:23+00:00

Fun fact: you can be a creepy 20 year old guy, hitting on 20 year old women.

If you're creepy, doesn't matter what age you are.

OriginalMandem · 2024-02-17T12:37:57+00:00

I'm in my 40s and they approach me 🤷

norwegiandoggo · 2024-02-17T11:34:44+00:00

It depends on how you do it and how attractive you are in all senses. I would see it as creepy if you're doing it in a creepy way. If you're doing it in a non-needy, non-thirsty, classy, cool way. That also encompasses looking for signs of interest before you approach and so on and so forth, and you dress well and seem like a well put together guy. And you use the indirect approach and back off if they don't seem interested. And if you look good for your age. Then I dont consider it creepy.

But if you're an out of shape, no fashion sense looking, aggressive approaching, direct method don't care about signs of interest or disinterst and so on and so forth. Looking 50 despite being 40, etc. then Yeah, you're creepy.

Redwolfdc · 2024-02-17T14:50:03+00:00

How do you dress/look? Are you in shape?

If you think about this….Jason Momoa is 44, I doubt any woman of any age would have a problem with someone like him approaching. But if you look like a typical old creepy guy and come off as old, then yeah it’s creepy

Dandys3107 · 2024-02-17T12:01:20+00:00

I believe it's more about your looks and health than your counter number. If you can meet the standards, girl may ignore your age gap to some extent.

puma085 · 2024-02-17T14:09:00+00:00

Early 20s might be creepy. Late/mind 20s and 30s not at all. The thing I find the most creepy is we have so many people here think it should be mandatory to date within their own age range. This a recipe for beeing lonely forever after you have reached a certain age range. At certain age singles are very rare breed and there are not enough singles left for everyone in that certain age range. There are legal and moral boundaries of course that should not violated. But making it as general rule just stick to women of your own range makes me cringe as 38 year old dude.

Chicagoj1563 · 2024-02-17T16:29:38+00:00

The focus should be on destroying your ego around thinking it’s creepy to approach younger women. Or that you care what others may think of it.

Go experience what you are most worried about. That people will think you’re creepy. The goal post is when you stop caring what people think, even if they think it’s creepy. So that is the finish line. When you stop caring. You’re not there now, but you will get their through quality and quantity of approaches.

Truth is there are younger women who’s preferred type are guys your age. That makes it worthwhile. And if you’re not doing anything wrong, it’s perfectly fine to approach people. So, there isn’t a rational reason to care about what people may think.

One core principle of good game is the world should be in reaction to you, not you to it. Can you see how reactive you are right now about this? You want to reverse that. It’s all inner game.

bassk_itty · 2024-02-17T14:09:06+00:00

I mean I feel like super young ladies (under 23) is a little weird, they have very little in common with you to where even spending the time with them for a casual hookup would feel weird.

Other than that though, not weird as long as you’re cool about it. I’ve been attracted to older guys since I was 23/24 (10, 15, 20+ yrs older). As long as they’re grown adults, creepy is defined by your behavior not by your age. Young men can be creepy, older guys can be normal.

birdgirl3333 · 2024-02-17T15:17:11+00:00

I love older men !!! Approach away ! Have fun 💯💯💯💯

TRTGymBro · 2024-02-17T18:31:01+00:00

Wow, Mark Manson tells a story about a guy like you in one of his seminars. Exact same story. Missed out on his youth because he was married and couldn't do anything with college students coming onto him (he was a college professor) and then when he divorced at 50, started going out to clubs to pursue these same young women. Except he was a creepy old guy and kept getting shot down. Lolololol

AtDaLastMinute · 2024-02-17T16:06:04+00:00

I don't know, I've (37M) spent time with a 22 year old who already is a mother. She still felt and looked like a child to me lol. Maybe because I'm 5'5" and she was like 4'10" and quite slim (I'm used to women around my height and more body).

My niece just turned 21 so maybe that's why it felt weird to me.

So, yeah. I like women around my age.

OP. As long as you're not being predatory you're okay. Some younger women are attracted to older men.

-PinkPower- · 2024-02-17T22:18:35+00:00

Yea, if a 40yo hit on me or my friends we are creeped out tbh. We are in our 20s. It’s close to our parents’ age.

jaypb182 · 2024-02-17T13:38:55+00:00

There is nothing inherently wrong with it, but people will perceive it differently depending on how you look. If you're a handsome and youthful looking 40 year old, you'll have an easier time. If you're the typical fat, 40 year old virgin, you'll definitely be considered a "creep".

nonFungibleHuman · 2024-02-17T15:25:41+00:00

I think people tend to project a lot their morals on others in this topic. I'd never judge someone in his 40 or even 50's approaching girls over 20+. I've seen 21 year old girls thinking like real adults and other 30+ girls being real teenagers.

I've seen happy functional couples with around 25 years of gap.

If you feel like doing it, do it, be confident, get what you want, you deserve it. Of course, respect boundaries, don't be creepy, be aware of body language and signals, and so on...

My personal recommendation for going for girls early 20's is that they should at least be working at something or finishing a carrier, otherwise they'll be pretty much 15 years old in their head.

CountingDays0815 · 2024-02-17T17:35:23+00:00

Im 47, before meeting my new gf (whose f33) i had a few (about 20) flings, fwb, hookups with 20 to 30 year olds.

Most of them just want to have a fun time, if you provide and dont be the creepy guy, they literally hop on you.

entredeuxeaux · 2024-02-17T21:13:56+00:00

Most will find you creepy. Some might not?

MasterGeek · 2024-02-17T22:17:52+00:00

Just bang the young women that you like by hiring them via Seeking or escorting

Status_Bee_7644 · 2024-02-17T23:59:06+00:00

Only creepy if you’re unattractive to the girls you approach.

Jailhouseredpilled93 · 2024-02-19T15:56:55+00:00

Just be aware of who likes you. It's not creepy if she's attracted.

mmxmlee · 2024-02-17T14:04:33+00:00

i am 37 and still date 18 and 19 year olds.

Men don't stop suddenly being attracted to hot college girls once they turn 30 or 40.

Anyone who says otherwise is delusional, hating, coping or cap'in.

HCHDGSH · 2024-02-17T12:04:05+00:00

I doubt I'd notice. Your question is if I would think it's creepy if I noticed that you KEPT approaching girls in their 20s and 30s. Now if I saw you approaching a 25 year old, what's not to say that that's one girl of many girls that you happen to be into of many ages that you approached.

For me to even notice a pattern of you only approaching girls of a certain age range would require me to pay you way more attention than I realistically probably would. And to me there's nothing wrong with you approaching girls in their 20's per se. I mean unless you want way younger girls because they're easier to manipulate or something that's pretty pathetic. But that's not an imminent situation and I'm not the dating police so chances are I'd be way more focussed on how my night is going than what you're doing. But that's just me.

FanAccomplished7407 · 2024-02-17T12:33:06+00:00

I don’t see it as being creepy depending on how you look and how attractive are you

random_encounter4539 · 2024-02-17T23:59:07+00:00

1) Be fit. Hit the gym, and that means go to one or pick a home gym plan. When you are older you got to put in more effort but if they can see muscle under your shirt (you don't have to be jacked but have muscle) then you are fine. If you have body fat put the fork down and think about what you are putting in your body. Eat lean high protein foods and vegitables and eat out only once a week. I make saturday my cheat day.

2) Dress nice. To make it easy, get a nice set of shoes made of leather (This one is important. Feux leather if you don't want real leather). Get a set of nice pants(khaki or really any other earth tone color) , a set of nice jeans (I find black tends to look good), and a nice belt. some solid color t-shits (no graphics), and a nice casual jacket (made of leather or the synthetic stuff) and a blazer jacket. Nothing too expensive, but not Walmart either. Middle of the road. Throw a nice looking watch into the mix for an accessory. No Rolex, but it has to look nice. DO NOT GET A ROLEX! That is gold digger/high maintainance bait.

3) Go to the barber and get a nice haircut. Look presentable. A little facial hair is fine, especially if you have some grey, but if you are full white, dye it to get some color back or clean shave. Clip your nails or go get a manicure. Prefer the latter. If you did the previous steps you will get hit on there, too. Tiege<---- Google this and take care of your skin.

4) You are not, NOT, a boy. You are a man. You have yourself put together. You have played those games, and you are over that shit. You are at the club becuase you want to be there and becuase you are on a first name basis with the bartenders and they make your drink just how you like it. Make what I said true. Get to the club early, as in just as they open and there are no people there. Talk with the bartenders and learn their names. Make sure they know your name. Find a drink you like, and order it every time. Tip as well as possible for your income. The bartenders will love you for this. Do this for a few weeks until you don't even have to order the drink. They just make it and slide it over to you.

Now look at it from the girl's point of view. James fucking Bond just walked into the club, was greeted by name and didn't even have to order his drink. He is friendly and well known. It's like a scene right out of the steamy romance novel she got hot and bothered over the other night. She has seen this movie a thousand times before she got out of high school. Now all you have to do when she approaches you (and if the girl approaches you it is never creepy) is make her believe she is Meg Ryan. Can't help you with that part so learn seduction tecniques while you are building yourself up.

avarciousRutabega99 · 2024-02-18T06:13:35+00:00

This age gap discrimination stuff is out of control. If everyone is an adult, why do you care? Men are expected to date no more than 2 years +/- their own age or else be accused of doing something wrong. Of course if the woman is older, no one accuses her of being creepy.

Dynamix86 · 2024-02-18T15:12:02+00:00

I’ve heard the too dating coaches on Youtube that are all in their forties now saying that it has never been easier for them to get (younger) girls than it is now. That says something

ROBYoutube · 2024-02-17T11:12:59+00:00

Now I'm super attracted by younger girls

Oh dear.

idontwannabhear · 2024-02-17T14:22:03+00:00

Evolutionary it makes complete sense to favour younger women man, look at Leo DiCaprio, just make sure they’re legal tho

Downtown_Rooster6552 · 2024-02-17T22:15:48+00:00

Dude the people who talk about this age gap shit are femcels and men in their 20s and 30s who can’t get women their own age. I agree that there is a limit, but over 20 is completely fair game. I’m 27 btw so don’t come at me calling me a creep.

I would think it’s honestly pretty natural. Younger woman tend to select for older, more established men. If they are made uncomfortable by it, they will let you know and then the onus is on you to back off.

faizy_25 · 2024-02-17T12:32:53+00:00

All good bro. Women always need older men who knows what they are doing .Not young guys who doesn’t know what they are doing ! Hope it makes sense. You own your shit , doesn’t make a big deal , then pussy is yours.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-02-17T15:43:09+00:00

If you look 43 it’s creepy

letsgetwizzyy · 2024-02-17T16:35:35+00:00

It's not weird at all. Men like younger women and women like older guys, it's just how it is. You can still approach women your age despite looking young. You may be immediately disqualified in bar settings, but outside of bar settings you should be fine.

As far as avoiding creep status, you're only creepy if you behave in a way that is creepy. More specifically, guys only consider women to be creepy when they find you unattractive, or when you can't take an indirect hint when they are rejecting you. So, in essence, it's not creepy at all. Especially when you look at it from the frame of women liking older men. I'm 27 and normally only date women 19-22.

Furthermore, you absolutely will not be perceived as a creep because you look younger than you actually are. If a woman is feeling you, she will be excited to be with an older man who takes care of himself. You've got nothing to worry about.

This article discusses how to approach women directly: https://open.substack.com/pub/jackedguy/p/how-to-approach-women-direct-game?r=31tj3q&utm\_campaign=post&utm\_medium=web

This article discusses how to approach them indirectly: https://open.substack.com/pub/jackedguy/p/how-to-approach-women-indirect-game?r=31tj3q&utm\_campaign=post&utm\_medium=web

weirdowerdo · 2024-02-17T11:43:20+00:00

Their 20's? Yes.

Their 30's? No.

Souporsam12 · 2024-02-17T12:47:19+00:00

Idk what interests you about 20 year old girls, I just turned 30 and any girl younger than 24/25 to me seems like an absolute child.

Like what will you even talk to them about outside of a material standpoint? If all you want to do is hook up and make up for your 20s sure go for it.

Aranea101 · 2024-02-17T14:02:24+00:00

Honestly, depends entirely on how good looking you are.

But on paper; yes.

V-Future · 2024-02-17T19:20:05+00:00

Adult people approaching adult people is normal. Worry if someone approaches a 7-year-old little girl. After 18 you are not a kid anymore. You can go to jail, pay taxes, go to war, sign contracts, ask for a loan, rent a house, build a business, etc. You are not young anymore, you are an adult.

YYZYYC · 2024-02-17T17:13:18+00:00

Not creepy, just sad

ShowerMotor · 2024-02-17T14:00:59+00:00

A guy in his forties that is well kept and embraces his age with style, that non-chalantly speaks to women in their 30s is totally fine and it can be attractive. Girls in their 20s...such big age gap it already is a bit creepy, I so I would stay away. Also going to a club full of 20s devalues your worth. Find other places to approach women in their 30s, clubs is for younger people.

hernanemartinez · 2024-02-17T15:48:04+00:00

44 here. I wouldn’t date or approach a 20 somthing even if it’s on sale and asking actively for it. They look like babies. What the hell? 0_o

Honest_Singer6162 · 2024-02-17T12:04:51+00:00

I dont think you're creepy at all. If you're meeting an intelligent and well-educated woman who's independent to make her own smart choices, I see nothing wrong with being friends at first and them moving things up a notch. If you both enjoy each other's company, then I don't think you should be judged. If you are preying on young women who don't meet the above standard, then that's creepy.

SgtSplacker · 2024-02-17T16:31:03+00:00

I think it's creepy when a younger girl is attracted to an older man, you know she just wants that money. Taking advantage of attraction to make a quick buck.

KindPossession2583 · 2024-02-17T17:25:04+00:00

I don’t think dating women 20 years younger is an issue at all. Just be tactful about it. I’m 40 and have dated women up to 17 years younger. I’m sure that as I get older that number will only increase.

eablokker · 2024-02-17T18:42:45+00:00

The only people who will shame you for that are younger guys, because you are their competition, and older women, because younger girls are their competition. It’s out of jealousy and threat to them. Don’t let them bully you with their words. It’s the only way they have to fight back against you because you have such an advantage over them. If people are upset by it, it’s a them problem. They need to get their own shit sorted out.

Here_4_the_bad_ones · 2024-02-17T20:02:58+00:00

When I was a teenager I used to fantasize about being with a milf, no woman can convince me that it’s not very common or maybe even more common for women to have a similar fantasy about a dilf. My cousin is 43 as well and I’m 29 and we both get tons of looks from 20 year old just for being well dressed and built. You’re ok bro, if you’re approaching a girl and she is giving you the vibe that she thinks you’re creepy then you don’t have to pursue, just let her be. There’ll be plenty more

CharmingRejector · 2024-02-17T21:58:07+00:00

Idk I'm 45 and dating a 20 yr atm. You tell me.

Yes, older women will try to guilt you for it bcos they're jealous. What else is new?

Expelleddux · 2024-02-18T01:19:47+00:00

Yes obviously. Don’t hit on 20 year olds at clubs.

XIVNorte · 2024-02-17T16:45:15+00:00

No. I don't give a shit about you. Do whatever you want and be happy. Good luck

HannahBakerrrrrrrrrr · 2024-02-17T18:27:54+00:00

It’s not creepy so long as you take no as a no lmao

Creepiness isn’t defined by age

_FIRECRACKER_JINX · 2024-02-17T13:56:26+00:00

These men are gassing you up.

Yes, it's creepy.

squirrelsridewheels · 2024-02-17T14:39:37+00:00

It’s creepy to see anyone in the club trying to pick up anyone if they are over the age of 35. Man or woman, unless that’s the age group of the crowd

D-majin · 2024-02-17T16:18:56+00:00

People have different opinions on it but not to me. 20 is an adult and young women tend to like older men anyway

busybeeJ · 2024-02-17T12:15:25+00:00

creepy as hell please don’t

Skylarias · 2024-02-17T12:24:30+00:00

As a woman, yes, it would be creepy. I'm 31, so I wouldn't be disgusted like I would be if I was still in my early or mid 20s.

But I'd still want nothing to do with you. Unless you were exceptionally attractive and fit for your age and very charming, or very wealthy (while still being attractive, fit, and charming). At the end of the day I want kids though, and 43 is too old for that.

SalamanderNo3872 · 2024-02-17T16:32:31+00:00

No not at all

Kobe_curry24 · 2024-02-17T18:11:50+00:00

Bruv just go out and have fun that’s the idea your their to find women that’s what it for Bo your limits and have fun

Daft__Odyssey · 2024-02-17T21:20:26+00:00

Not really, man. You do you. If you don't make it a big deal, no one will care other than acknowledge that you still got game ;)

Fantastic_Zebra8123 · 2024-02-17T22:12:30+00:00

Lookup hoe_math's chart/visual guide. Wealth, status, physical fitness, etc. this all makes age gaps irrelevant.

SecurityDelicious928 · 2024-02-18T01:20:45+00:00

it's not creepy you being attracted to beauty. If the women are about it, I say go for it bro.

epimpstyle · 2024-02-17T12:26:31+00:00

[permanently deleted]

lonelyboyhours · 2024-02-17T11:52:51+00:00

Yes. Creepy.

Take a long hard look at yourself and why you think you are attracted to younger women. Are you perhaps projecting your own immaturities onto them?

At best, you’re a creep. At worst, you’re threatening to inflict long term psychological damage onto the young girls who (for now) don’t know any better.

Minute_Abroad_8105 · 2024-02-17T14:42:00+00:00

5 holes first thou and i pick who we have a deal

Velcade6 · 2024-02-17T20:37:49+00:00

RemindMe! 5 days

ThotBubble · 2024-02-18T01:40:01+00:00

No one cares bro if you can get girls it doesn’t matter the age

BlindMice5 · 2024-02-18T01:46:07+00:00

If ur in shape and you’re somewhat good lookin then ur cookin wit gas. If you were a fat unwashed hobo then it would be a lot creepier.

It’s a normal thing for young women to like older men. It’s a normal thing for young men to like older women.

I’m a 20 year old dude. I wish a gorgeous 40 year old woman would approach me. I can’t see why the inverse wouldn’t be appropriate.

Lusciousgirl1 · 2024-02-18T01:52:48+00:00

Hitting on 20s yes creepy, 30s is fine

Pedro_Moona · 2024-02-18T02:57:22+00:00

When I was 23M I hooked up with a 48 yr old women and It was dang good. She loved some young dick. Now that I'm older I know some younger girls are looking for the same experience. If you ask most sexually active girls in their 20s if they have hooked up with a guy who's late 30s or early 40s, most would say yes but only a few times.

nordik1 · 2024-02-18T03:23:04+00:00

Depends on your vibe overall. Some people seem old and creepy at 30, whereas others would be hard to believe they're 40 because of their more youthful spirit and looks. Fashion plays a big role too. Older guys who dress like they're 18 look like dorks.

Just make casual conversation and be the fun guy

rjones416 · 2024-02-18T05:30:12+00:00

It depends on what club you're going to. If it's a club full of college age people you will stick out like a sore thumb.

BudgetInteraction811 · 2024-02-18T05:37:03+00:00

It’s a common joke amongst young women for a reason, but yeah, the 40 year old guy at the club filled with 19-25 year olds is usually considered creepy. There’s always that one guy or one group of older creeps that hit on women half their age who are just trying to dance. It’s not a good look.

sumimigaquatchi · 2024-02-18T05:50:00+00:00

No. Why would it be creepy? Lol

Pyroftw3 · 2024-02-18T10:12:56+00:00

im 32 and consistently hookup with 18-23 year old, actually most of the girls i hooked up with were in that range, but that being said i look way younger, goodlooking and well put together so i doubt anyone judges. I even had 16-17 y olds approach me on street/club but for obvious reasons i dodge that :)

Also you shouldn't care what other people think, some people will find a 20 y old guy approaching a 20 y old girl creepy, some will find it disgusting, some people think that you should wait till marriage.

Exotic_Pop_765 · 2024-02-18T12:52:09+00:00

If you are stylish and act natural the opposite would be true. Bonus points if you also intimidate younger guys.

Malrothisgay · 2024-02-24T09:41:20+00:00

Not at a party but one of my coworkers is 42

I am 25 and he spoke with me cause he thought i was under 18

It is creepy

Title	Would you see it as creepy if a 40 year old kept approaching girls in their 20s or 30s in clubs?
Author	aquilaruspante1
Upvotes	203
Comments	186
Date	February 17, 2024 11:08 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1aszkdw/would_you_see_it_as_creepy_if_a_40_year_old_kept/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/would-you-see-it-as-creepy-if-a-40-year-old-kept.1427587 https://theredarchive.com/post/1427587

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