How about some slightly less depressing, how should a guy healthily meet someone in 2024?

Combatenjoyer23 · 2024-09-20T19:44:32+00:00

You can meet anybody anywhere, but I think the most important thing that a guy needs to do is adopt a genuine stone cold, don't give a fuck attitude when it comes to rejection. Like even if you approach somebody and they laugh in your face, you need to frame it in a way where it's a character flaw with them and not yourself. Just smile and walk away without saying anything. And of course if they reject you politely, just recognize that it wasn't meant to be at that current moment for what could be 100 different reasons. Always approach with the expectation that a rejection is coming so that you aren't living in the results so that you'll be able to relax and converse freely. Remember that these women are just people with flaws like any other people. They aren't better than you nor vice versa. Gotta be able to learn to walk through the fear of the initial approach.

unbannableBob · 2024-09-21T01:00:05+00:00

Nowhere.

It's over.

Dating apps are shit.

Work is shutting where you eat.

School is good but it's a narrow time window and you have to use looks because no one is really rich at school.

Anywhere else is rape.

Feisty_Response_9401 · 2024-09-20T18:36:33+00:00

If you are very attractive, dating apps are OK.

If you are average, then school, college and work may help you meet new people.

If you are ugly, you may be do well dating even uglier or fatter women.

In any case, as someone mentioned, mutual friends are a good way to meet new people if you are social.

wtknight · 2024-09-20T20:46:34+00:00

Politely talking to people, whether online or offline, is the best way to do it.

Aggravating-Part9 · 2024-09-20T20:26:49+00:00

When you see a girl you like, hit on her. Boldly pursue her and don’t worry about hiding your intentions. In fact, make it super clear you’re not interested in being pals.

No_Mechanic_3299 · 2024-09-20T20:52:56+00:00

Dating apps are VERY shallow with people mostly looking for hookups so I’d try mutual friends honestly. If you’re generally attractive all you have to do is go out honestly.

RahLyt · 2024-09-20T21:19:28+00:00

However you want. Life only truly begins when you start living with yourself as a point of reference.

Majority of people are dumb or/and don't give too much thought about the topics you care about so asking them on how you should live your life is foolish.

It's much better to focus on what you want and plan on how you get there.

The problem is most people want to achieve their goals without any pain along the way, go out there look for what you want, if it doesn't work take a step back, analyse, calibrate and try it again, there's nothing else to it.

Goonerlouie · 2024-09-20T20:34:10+00:00

Despite reddit, at work is fine but you have to play the long game.

Never done the apps but how bad can they be?

Fair-Bus-4017 · 2024-09-20T18:55:02+00:00

There is no one size fits all solution for this unfortunately.

But I would ignore online dating unless you are incredibly handsome or have an extremely strong mental. AND is willing to dig through all the people who want casual sex.

Besides that you should make sure you socialize with people of the opposite often in situations which interests you. This can be bars, parties, music events you name it. Hell you can even do it though online communities if you don't want to leave your house.

soontobesolo · 2024-09-20T19:42:05+00:00

Apps for sure. You get so many introductions and you know they're all interested, at least a bit. You take it from there.

bzl33 · 2024-09-20T21:24:13+00:00

prioritize finding someone by your early-mid 20s (<25) and you'll be fine

DaHouseSomalian · 2024-09-20T22:15:22+00:00

It’s not about the where and how but about the who. Who does the meeting and approaching. Everything else is details.

BC_Flowers · 2024-09-20T22:37:02+00:00

Any way you want. But if you have been trying to meet someone in your area and it hasn't worked, maybe try changing locations?

Many men haven't had good luck in USA but do very well in Philippines, or Brazil, or China. I have friends who studied abroad and immediately had a better dating life. I encourage that.

Junior_Ad_3086 · 2024-09-21T04:43:51+00:00

i met all of my previous girlfriends without specifically looking for somebody to date. i think that's what people refer to when they say 'it will happen when you least expect it'. i just ran into them and got to know them.

i work from home but i don't think it's a great idea meeting somebody that way, at least not if you work together somewhat closely and long-term. i only use dating sites and go to bars/clubs when i travel and for casual dating in the past, i don't think i'm very likely to find someone i'm looking on the apps. nowadays i try meeting women through social circles and volunteering.

obviousredflag · 2024-09-21T11:00:09+00:00

In 2024, the best way to meet someone is by combining dating apps, social activities, and events that align with your interests, while avoiding relying solely on any one method. Focus on self-improvement, confidence, and communication skills to make yourself more desirable. Be intentional and genuine in your approach, and prioritize shared values over superficial attraction.

Wide-Explanation-725 · 2024-09-20T20:46:21+00:00

As a guy you make yourself desirable with money, looks and social status. If you don’t have ALL THREE, prepare to date way below your standard.

rustlerhuskyjeans · 2024-09-20T19:42:52+00:00

If you have an actual online persona with a linkedin and fun instagram, dating apps are the easiest by far to meet women. I’ve gotten the best options on there and can go on endless dates just by swiping and asking out.

Women always google you before the online date, they want to know you have a career and your own residence. If she can’t verify who you are, or doesn’t like one thing she sees online, she likely isn’t going. For example my Instagram doesn’t have my real name, some girls think I’m shady for that and have bailed on me. They will find any reason not to go on a date with you. Once they show up, dates are usually fun and good times.

Bars and clubs are great, but you need a solid wingman who’s down for rejection and possible hookups with you. A good wingman is hard to find.

Most guys just use social circles or work where you are more vetted as an options. I don’t like this because if the date goes bad or you don’t want to continue the relationship if she’s directly connected to a social circle it gets uncomfortable. Plus is your actual soul mate your friends friend? Finding women on your own is much more fulfilling in my experience.

TheRedPillRipper · 2024-09-21T02:33:03+00:00

the best way

Networks. Cute story time; wife and I met though my cousin. She was a former colleague of my cousin. Cousin was raving about her to me. I was dating another woman at the time, when I bumped into her at a conference. We swapped numbers, but I was already dating so put her on the back burner. Bumped into her again a few months later with my cousin, when single again. Cousin just kept at both of us, until we agreed to go on a date. Planned my usual, coffee and a stroll. Friend calls me up; asks if I want to play a pickup game of football. I’m in. After commiting, realise I had double booked myself. Quick thinking, thought she might like the idea of watching me play. Pick her up. Tell her we’re going for a surprise. She tells me she hates surprises. I told her okay, I thought you might want to come watch me play football. She hates football. I’m devastated. Again, quickly thinking, tell her look I’ll play one half, then I’ll take her for a walk and a coffee after. In the meantime there’s a few galleries near the field she can check out. The mood.. It’s icy.

After the game, I run around to find her. Didn’t have much on, other than some shorts and a singlet. Find her. Take her to a lake, grab a coffee, and we go for a stroll. She often tells that story, and said after I revealed ‘the surprise’, she was done. It was only after I came running, looking for her, that she had a change of heart. Said the shorts helped a bit too. Almost blew up my family, before I had a chance.

ARealScarletPrince · 2024-09-21T21:21:45+00:00

How should a guy meet someone in 2024

You don't.

Jonkunpojanhaamu · 2024-09-22T08:39:53+00:00

Unless you are rich or in top 20 percent by looks: that is the neat part you don't. All of dating has now been pushed to places women wanted to push them that is OLD and meeting through family or their friends. This allows women to act the way they do which is just sitting around farting at the finish line and do the picking.

It is literally over for good. It is time to do drugs and play video games or whatever you want until you die.

leosandlattes · 2024-09-20T18:32:08+00:00

I met my boyfriend through mutual friends. I'm not sure there's a "best" way - it depends on the kind of person you are, what you like, the kinds of people you are attracted to. I have only ever dated in my social proximity.

Making yourself desirable looks very different between men and women. I am not a man so I can't answer this exactly, but some of the things I found attractive in my man were his beautiful green eyes, the way he smiled, and he always had something funny to say or something interesting to add to the conversation. So a combination of looks and personality.

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DankuTwo · 2024-09-21T05:37:44+00:00

“Blind luck” seems to be my preferred method these days…..

Tbh, I’ve not been on a dating app since 2017, so a lot could have changed, but I found them really effective; far better than any “natural” method in both quantity and quality.

Outside of apps I’ve met girls through work (some I dated, some not), which at least means we have similar interests/lifestyle and usually mutual acquaintances (I work kind of a weird job….highly insular).

Met one girl who was being ignored at a restaurant (probably because she was Chinese). I helped her out (called the server over as if I needed something, and then directed him to her), and we wound up chatting and exchanging phone numbers (which I hadn’t expected). Didn’t work out because of Mainland dating culture….it felt kind of weird.

Unable_Evidence_4028 · 2024-09-21T18:17:56+00:00

church
countryside
immigrant communities
outside of the west

tacticaltossaway · 2024-09-20T19:43:25+00:00

You consider this less depressing?

SaBahRub · 2024-09-22T15:02:33+00:00

The data is pretty clear on how it happens, despite all the whining

https://www.statista.com/chart/amp/20822/way-of-meeting-partner-heterosexual-us-couples/

budgetmexican · 2024-09-25T15:37:48+00:00

You make yourself desirable as a man by having looks money and status.

Kapoue · 2024-09-21T05:15:37+00:00

I see a lot of singles events desperately looking for men on our local neighborhood Facebook group. The women spots fill easily but they have trouble finding men.

They organize quiz nights or karaoke nights with 20 men and 20 women. At the end of the event, you say who you were interested in and the organizer gives you their numbers if you both were interested in eachother.

MailenJokerbell · 2024-09-21T07:21:38+00:00

Well, if you have a dog that makes talking to people extremely easy.

Not a guy, but I didn't even meet my neighbors until 2 years in when I got my dog. I talk to people way more and people tend to talk to me even if it's just go say hi to my dog or say that they also have one. This is not relationship related but I swear it gives a great boost to just have normal consistent conversations within your neighborhood.

Sharp_Engineering379 · 2024-09-20T22:12:10+00:00

A real life friends group which stays in touch via a social media group. I manage mine, and it has 72 members. Maybe ten are close friends, the rest are friends of those friends, some siblings, maybe a few coworkers.

I post events and things to do like concerts and sporting events, new restaurants, festivals, food truck rallies. Hiking, golf, and paddling in summer, bowling, dog park year round. Play dates for the friends with little ones. People who like to shop ask “anyone want to help me shop for my nephew’s birthday/find some new hiking boots” and interested people meet and shop and get food. I wingman for single friends occasionally, and DD for friends I’m certain won’t barf in my car.

I host Friendsgiving, someone else does a big New Years thing.

I don’t participate in much until the winter months, but I keep the conversation moving.

But I don’t mind meeting up with friends of friends to shop or walk the dogs, so if I wanted to hang out, someone is always available.

Title	How about some slightly less depressing, how should a guy healthily meet someone in 2024?
Author	Throwaway26702008
Upvotes	19
Comments	140
Date	September 20, 2024 3:22 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1flemuy/how_about_some_slightly_less_depressing_how/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-about-some-slightly-less-depressing-how-should.1530878 https://theredarchive.com/post/1530878

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