Q4M: Why do guys approach women they cannot afford?

Downtown_Werewolf_44 · 2025-04-05T10:47:32+00:00

-Don't date women that you can't afford!

-Ok, then I can't afford a woman with kids.

-How dare you !

addings0 · 2025-04-05T06:49:43+00:00

If you know a woman can afford to pay a certain lifestyle for herself, and you date her... Why wouldn't you meet or exceed her lifestyle?

Apparently, women only value status, lifestyles, indifference, and ( pleasant convenient new ) experiences. Not people, stability, or equality.

ComfortableJeans · 2025-04-05T01:47:57+00:00

Most people likely aren't operating on the assumption that they must be financing a potential partners lifestyle.

They're more thinking that they might like a person, and might like a person the more they got to know them on a personal level.

A lot of people don't like the idea that their personhood, and value as a human comes from how much money they might have to exchange with someone in order to interact with them.

If a person truly likes and enjoys you, they'll like you in the park, drinking coffee, feeding the ducks and talking for hours.

If a person only likes you when you're giving them money/money adjacent things, then they like your money/money adjacent things.

I can't stress it enough. If a person likes you, they don't need to be bought. They'll just want to be around you. To interact with you.

To be fair to her, she's being very up front about the kind of persons she is, so I can't fault her for deceiving anyone.

I would more ask, "Why are these men interacting with her, expecting her to not be primarily money orientated, while she is clearly primarily money orientated?".

Which, to be fair, is a fair question, given how up front she is.

I tend to fall in love when partners behave as though they were their own people.
Not a high maintenance exotic pet that needs X amount of funding else I have to give them up.

I just can't imagine looking at my partner and having them think/know that the second they stopped paying me, the love stops. How could my partner truly love me if that were the case? How am I going to be in love with someone and treat them that way?

It's hard for me to put myself in their mindset, because I find everything about that video is utterly repugnant, repellent and revolting in terms of a relationship, or interacting with that person. Shrieking "You can't afford me!" is just... Deeply, deeply off putting. So I have no idea what would drive a person to want to interact with them.

... Other than these men likely just throwing a long shot at pussy, I guess.

cuminciderolnyt · 2025-04-05T14:17:53+00:00

flip the script and if men decide only be with women who are on their level.. most women would throw a hissy fit

growframe · 2025-04-05T02:12:37+00:00

Why does this woman have a price tag?

TraditionalPen2076 · 2025-04-05T14:12:57+00:00

"Women they can't afford"

So y'all ARE objects?

Friedrich_Friedson · 2025-04-05T06:22:12+00:00

Yet when guys try to date her, they want to take her to less fancy and less expensive places - which is frustrating!

Hey,we can still go to the fancy place,she can cover it🤷

If you know a woman can afford to pay a certain lifestyle for herself, and you date her... Why wouldn't you meet or exceed her lifestyle?

Because we don't aim at financing our partner's stuff? If she can afford it before,she can afford it after

ThinkSupermarket6163 · 2025-04-05T01:47:20+00:00

Shooters shoot

Livid-Log7463 · 2025-04-05T20:49:10+00:00

Well if she can provide this lifestyle for herself why would she care about what a man can provide for her or not? Is she looking to have a man provide this lifestyle of hers instead of herself so she no longer needs to do anything for it? Is she incapable of attraction to anything but a lifestyle being provided for her?

FrodoCraggins · 2025-04-05T04:26:48+00:00

"I live in a house. Why do women who live in apartments think they have a shot at dating me? Don't they know they're too poor for the lifestyle I can afford to give myself and are thus subhumans who shouldn't even be in the same room as me?"

OP, this is how you and the woman in your example come off.

SteveSan82 · 2025-04-05T01:55:30+00:00

So you’re saying women are prostitutes.

MarioWilson122 · 2025-04-05T01:55:53+00:00

Women like this i question is she looking for a man to be with or a ATM.

KhadgarIsaDreadlord · 2025-04-05T13:43:29+00:00

The men who hit her up are probably looking for a love based relationship, not a sugar baby - sugar daddy arrangement. She is looking to be a sugar baby but isn't honest with herself about that. So it's a miscommunication.

If you are looking at this from the perspective of someone who is looking for partnership she sounds entiltled af. That said it's ok if she wants to be a luxury escort /sugar baby/ trophy wife, I'd imagine a lot of girls are after that lifestyle.

No-Rough-7390 · 2025-04-05T14:09:22+00:00

Money has never been an object in me being able to date and bed women. I dated a pretty prestigious doctor in my city who is older than and she paid for most things while we were together. If you have a look and game, it doesn’t matter.

And let’s be real, in today’s age where women don’t need men’s money, you have no choice but to capitalize on other facets of hypergamy.

just_a_place · 2025-04-06T06:42:11+00:00

Answer: We don't.

they want to take her to less fancy and less expensive places - which is frustrating!

Because they are dating her, not fucking marrying her. Men will not waste their hard earned cash on a woman for the same reason we do not pay to get interviewed for a job. If she's already flaunting that she can provide for herself then why the fuck is she expecting my money? Unless she's some phony ass bitch just looking to con me.

The idea of a date is to get to know the woman, not waste my fucking money so that she can then say no and take me for a fucking simp that she just conned out of his time and money.

jazzmaster1992 · 2025-04-05T01:54:30+00:00

I know multiple men who are married to women who make more than them. Even if it's statistically uncommon, a good number of men and women don't subscribe to the belief that one gender should match or exceed the earnings of the other as some kind of principle.

ProtectionPolitics4 · 2025-04-05T01:49:14+00:00

As a high income and high net worth guy, I've yet to see it even be a real factor. I know guys love to pretend that it's a huge deal, but it really isn't. Bring up money and watch women get turned off on the first date.

Blitted_Master · 2025-04-05T01:49:28+00:00

Lol @ buying a woman’s affections. I like who likes me. Stop simping. Jesus.

wtknight · 2025-04-05T02:32:14+00:00

Men do do this. It's why some become passport bros and date women from poor countries who are impressed when a man can afford to treat them at just a normal restaurant.

Hi-Road · 2025-04-05T18:33:47+00:00

Feeling some type of way cause a type of person wanted to approach you respectfully is weird, sorry. Get over yourself

Barely-moral · 2025-04-05T02:03:40+00:00

Well... she is not that pretty. She doesn't seem to add anything to my life considering she uses her money as an excuse to msake me spend more. She is not worth a serious try.

ThisTimeForRealYo · 2025-04-05T12:10:12+00:00

Why are you not engaging with anyone in this thread? Remove this garbage.

Stock-Argument-1040 · 2025-04-05T02:01:24+00:00

Why should someone assume that the person they're pursuing values their income to that extent? Plenty of wealthy women would gladly date a guy making 50k a year if he met her standards. Why should he assume her standards include the expense of a dinner? It's strange to act the way she is acting because a guy asked you out and wasn't as wealthy as you'd like. You can have whatever standard you want but you need to know that not everyone shares those standards, people do not know your standards until you tell them and getting butt hurt that someone didn't meet your standards (assuming they remained respectful) is odd behaviour.

Trancetastic16 · 2025-04-05T02:43:08+00:00

Some of us don’t care about income so long as the potential partner can support themselves with their basic needs of food, water and shelter, including if they were homeless or a legal prostitute, and those of us who feel this way do our best to date up, across and down socio-economic level.

And in the case of dating-up, would arrange saving well to support our own way when dating this person and seek someone compatible for doing so as often as we can reasonably afford after a modest amount of time to save-up.

Those who are incompatible with the other person’s income and lifestyle should do their best to find those who feel the same as them in this area of life and not negatively judge those who are from different socio-economic status and cultures seeking their match in values.

captaindestucto · 2025-04-10T14:27:13+00:00

Because people date for other reasons.

James_M_Croft · 2025-04-16T19:00:38+00:00

Whats there to lose? a young man may approach literal thousands of women a year... why does a woman who get nice things from their sugar daddy be beyond our scope? all men eventually hit on all women around their age abovea certain minimum of fuckability anyway... so may as well get there once you are done with the easier ones.

nsfwthrowaway6996 · 2025-04-05T01:53:06+00:00

First, I don't believe shit about social media. This definitely comes off across as humble bragging.

Probably a "numbers" men. Guys that just shoot off messages in high numbers in the hopes something sticks. They don't check profiles or anything. Just click and send a message. Zero thoughts.

GKilat · 2025-04-05T01:55:44+00:00

They are just hoping that somehow she would lower her standards for them. They know they can't afford her but they hope she would make herself affordable for them because they think highly of themselves.

_here_ok · 2025-04-05T02:12:54+00:00

the men doing it and the woman expecting anything are just being idiotic in my opinion. man is trying to fulfill the provider ego which doesn't work when she can provide for herself and him. meanwhile if she expects a guy to pay for her lifestyle that she's been paying then it's like, she has to have her standards set and any notion of less must be met with a firm no. if it's a random guy then that shouldn't be expected at all.

a date is called a date because it's an appointed arrangement to figure things out, bond and ect. not to live a life style but figure that out. if neither party fancied eachother in the first place then the question of the date actually being for a romantic relationship comes into play.

Comfortable-Dare-307 · 2025-04-05T13:31:13+00:00

All women, yes all, only value men for what they can give her. Why do we have to have money to be valued by women. This just shows women aren't looking for a relationship. They just want an ATM. I will never give money to a woman outside my family again.

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-04-05T18:21:31+00:00

You're right, people shouldn't try to date out of their league

Remarkable-Strain157 · 2025-04-05T02:19:59+00:00

You never know, all it takes is one guy to change a woman’s whole perspective 🤷‍♂️ soon or later women like her in this video realize money isn’t always everything. Time shows you a thing or too.

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Title	Q4M: Why do guys approach women they cannot afford?
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	0
Comments	126
Date	April 5, 2025 1:37 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1jrsc7w/q4m_why_do_guys_approach_women_they_cannot_afford/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-why-do-guys-approach-women-they-cannot-afford.1548635 https://theredarchive.com/post/1548635

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