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Theory Weekend - No Stupid Questions Thread Part II

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April 23, 2016

Thanks to the huge success of our No Stupid Questions Thread, We're going to continue the theme in this thread, since the old one got rather large.

Ask your stupid questions here, no judgement zone.

Post Information
Title Theory Weekend - No Stupid Questions Thread Part II
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 70
Comments 426
Date 23 April 2016 04:32 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/57963
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/4g45su/theory_weekend_no_stupid_questions_thread_part_ii/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
the red pill

[–]DarkCotton0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Starting a revolution.

I've never read anything about offering the red pill to anyone. Why is this? I showed it to four of my close friends and two took to it while one of the others went into denial and the other already knew about it. I've been lurking here for a very long time. Again, why don't you guys offer the red pill?

[–]fuckposter0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Maybe some see it as creating more competition?

Also, when it comes to adopting new ideas, I often find that men need to feel like they've "discovered" it themselves. If someone else is trying to sell it to them (not just TRP), they often won't consider taking it seriously.

[–]lund-gard 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I greatly appreciate this sub for how it goes against popular opinion to speak the logical and scientific truth, no matter how bleak it may be.

However, since the sub is focused only on sexual strategy, I'd like to know if community members could recommend other resources (such as YouTube channels, subreddits or books) which also reveal reality in the same way on topics like personal finance, higher education, or careers.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There are posts dealing with smart financial strategies.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

The majority of my life and even at this very moment, I've been that introverted person, being unable to get along with people, especially with women. I can't seem to find my Alpha and I'm stuck being that Beta guy that doesn't come out of the lot. Good thing though, PUA and TRP are helping a lot to improve my inner maleness. Also, I'm just 18 (don't take that TOO seriously, I'm quite young and I know it. I'm not being desperate, only looking for advice).

Now here goes my situation. Last Summer, I started dating that fantastic girl that was chasing after me for 2 years (without me realizing it. Yeah I'm a fool.), but it didn't work out (it was my first time dating and you know, I pretty much suck at it lol). It's been many months since the "split-up" and we started talking to each other once again on Facebook, having conversations lasting for 3-4 hours. Now I still think she's into me (that's also what a lot of my friends tell me), but she never talks and/or replies during weekends. But when Monday comes, we get those huge conversations all over again. So my questions are :

1- Since weekends are mostly the greatest opportunities to hang out with people, does her remaining silent during that period tell me she's not into me and that I should let it go? I still need to remind you guys that we've been dating before so if she actually wasn't into me now, she wouldn't have taken the time to talk to me for 3 hours straight, right?

2- Should I just try to force things a little bit, or should I actually use the idgaf attitude and let her chase again?

[–]RedEyesBlueShades0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A little late... but here goes, a combined answer to both 1 and 2.

Force things, without GAF.

This movie, as it's currently evolving, is this: You talk on Monday, and she's getting what she wants. What does she want? Maybe some entertainment on a Monday evening because all her friends are out? Maybe a shoulder to cry on? An emotional tampon? Who knows, and it doesn't matter. You must force change, or this movie will continue on an endless loop.

Next time you talk to her, after 1hr, tell her you gotta go and end the conversation. Don't detail why, you're just "busy". Then, the next week, do it again, perhaps even earlier. And say "Hey, let's catch up one of these days." and then exit the convo. A few days later, (on Wed) text her when is she free for a few drinks. It may well be on a week day, you're not gonna go out with anything else in mind other than having some fun. You may even anticipate "Don't get any silly ideas... it's not like we're having sex tonight!". And it's perfectly OK if you don't have sex, though you should progress just as you'd do with any other woman, because you would escalate with another woman, wouldn't you? And then take it from there.

But understand this: If you force something it may break. And ask yourself, is this once a week thing something you are happy with? Understand this is not gonna change on its own. And understand she won't jump on your cock on her own. So what is better, no contact at all, or this sporadic contact that leads to nothing? Better, that leads to her interrupting the convo because you got boring.

So IDGAF comes in when you realize that you force it and it may break, either way, it's fine. Why? It's not like you're getting much out of it now, is it? You don't wanna be an emotional tampon, do you?

[–]rockin_rollin960 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Could someone explain qualifying and rapport to me? I often come across them together, and I understand building and breaking rapport is part of the push/pull dynamic of flirting. But shit tests are rapport breaks, so would dealing with them also be rapport breaks? Does one need to be able to switch between both depending on who's pulling or pushing? For qualifying, is it something you should be doing or something you should be causing the woman to do through breaking rapport and pushing? I haven't seen this fully broken down and if it is any links would be appreciated

[–]fluffyshuffle0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Many of the women in my peer group are hitting the 30-35 age range, and TRP has given me a lot of insight on the concept of the Wall, and it's a growing curiosity for me. My observation:

The Wall is the crushing pressure of adulthood: Thirties are an age when most people assume they would have had their life figured out - and granted many people do - but a huge swath of people, most of which are women, seem to be lost in the dust. What I mean is this: Many of the women I know haven't accomplished their goals, their dreams, or had success in some of the more classical measures like career or finances. And, at some point that knowledge comes home to roost: they've been wasting their time.

I've seen this play out in a few ways:

  1. Panic, then find a willing guy who's half-decent and commit to a boring, unfulfilling life, until such time as they hit the next Wall they erected for themselves.

  2. Double down, and blame society/men/patriarchy, while trolling the dance floor on weekends.

  3. Turn to Woo, and embrace the healing power of crystals, pranic energies, and changing your quantum reality by focusing their animal spirits.

And I don't want to pick on just one gender here at all. I think many men hit this same Wall, but for different reasons.

My question is probably more of a discussion, but what have you all experienced of women, or men, hitting the wall?

[–]ShopAndHover 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I'm working as a waiter and plan on doing it until i finish my studies since it brings a steady income that passes many other jobs that require a degree in my country. It's a good job that can skyrocket your social skills if you approach it the right way, since you are basically cold approaching tables with sometimes multiple girls, and with a high enough game/looks, you get comfortable with talking to them soon enough.

My question is, it is in its basic form still a job that requires you to service customers, does it subconciously develop a submissive mentality, and can you fight it ?

[–]mrpCamper0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I think the part you are subtly realizing and not appreciating is the fact that you are learning how to be socially dominant in a servant role. This is an invaluable skill for later in life. imagine a few years from now when you are the junior member in a meeting and you are taking control. This is similar to how you get folks back to focusing on their menu and making a decision because you've got tons of other shit going on. But you make it look like you are giving all your attention to them.

I think it's great people person experience.

[–]ShopAndHover 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Hmm, thanks for puting it into words, had a similar idea intuitively, but that little worm got in my head

[–]mrpCamper0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No problem. I could tell you knew this but weren't sure. I waited tables, worked construction and was a bar back in college, bussed tables in High School. Now, I am a corporate executive with two Master's degrees in my mid forties.

...If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Yesterday I was texting a girl that I will meet tomorrow.

During the interaction she asked me the true meaning of something I said, and instead of taking her seriously, I answered in a playfull way.

Her: you're just trolling, you know what I meant.

Me: I love trolling

After that, she didn't reply, and I was tempted to text her again but this time with the answer she was looking for, but I didn't.

Now, what I wanna know is if what I did was too much, or if I did good and she is just shit-testing me by not replying.

[–]Endorsed Contributorex_addict_bro2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Texting only for logistics

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I know. That's why I started the convo.

The only thing is that I'm not sure if I did too much.

Although I don't give a fuck, I still wanna know for knowledge purposes.

[–]yaysmr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Text her tomorrow to confirm the meeting. If she is still meeting you, then NO, you did not go too far, and you can perhaps investigate at the meeting itself.

Radio silence should remain in place, and don't text anything that could be taken as an apology.

IF you must talk to her, say that you'll 'answer that question when we speak in person' or something to that effect.

Also, "I love trolling" is kinda weird to say, and not exactly 'playful' in the sense it intrigues her or amuses her. Might have been better to go ambiguous.

[–]SoSconed0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

What do I do about a plate who's getting to comfortable?

Do I imply she's a plate, tell her she's a plate or just break it off?

I'm willing to put in a little bit of effort to rectify the issue.

[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

who's getting to comfortable?

Define what you mean here please.

Getting too comfortable, in my book, means she's not putting in the effort I want her to put in for things like sex, her appearance, doing things for me etc. The standard response is to dread her. You can also educate and nudge her in the right direction with some commands, but that depends on the relationship dynamic, how strong your frame is and how much she trusts you etc.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I constantly make contact with women, and have a pretty decent success rate. I can pull, I can maintain their attraction, but there's always something that can have some devastating effects for me early on in the texting period.

I hate being ignored, more than anything. So how do you approach it if a girl ignores your messages? I've never been able to find a good strategy to this. Is purposely ignoring texts a shit test by girls?

[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

So how do you approach it if a girl ignores your messages?

You move on. You know what the worst thing you're going to have to acknowledge is? There are other men out there with higher SMV than you who are willing to bang that same chick. And if one of those men shows her some interest... she's going to pay attention to him and ignore you. That is what will happen and short of upping your SMV, there's nothing you can do about it other than move along.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Probably the best advice I've got on here. Tough pill to swallow, but who cares about other guys. I'm for improving my self for my self. Becoming the ultimate version of my self is the goal.

[–]Joseph_the_Carpenter0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It's what they do. If it's happening consistently you need to evaluate yourself and see what you're missing or doing wrong.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm finding just reading most things on here are making me more aware of what I should be doing, regardless of how much I was doing it. But some self reflection may be necessary.

[–]gghavoc0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I'm trying to determine my best plan of action for a meetup with a girl i've known/talked with for a while. She lives out of state but we communicate almost daily, and I visited her once before. At the time, I was unaware of trp and made several mistakes I now see. We hung out and went to a local fair, mall and dinner of course. Had a good time but nothing materialized, as I was hesitant. She is a single mom, so it made it difficult to get her alone. As we continue our communications, she let's out that she was dating a guy who lives nearby and they had sex at some point. I was upset about this but realized it was dumb and if anything, lets me know she should be an easy lay at this point. My issue is with how to play it, as we may meet up somewhere later this year, as she is lonely and such. I'm pretty sure she has a wild side with her history, but is in that wall territory. I would like to remain friends if possible, but want to have sex with her of course. I have made it clear I'm not looking for anything serious, and she is cool with it.

[–]yaysmr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm seeing some crazy signs here bud:

She lives out of state

Like, she has to take a flight or drive more than like 5 hours to see you?

Don't expect that to turn into anything unless she is willing to relocate.

but we communicate almost daily

I think you're making yourself way too available for what you're getting, especially if you're only talking about personal shit. At first blush it seems like you're in emotional tampon territory.

I visited her once before

You. visited. her. Just consider a few of the messages that sends. You're clearly the one doing the pursuing, she knows you're willing to give up your time and money to give her attention, and she has done what in return?

Your objective here should be to get HER to come to you, make YOUR SMV high enough that she wants to take the effort to capture your attention. You're giving it up too easily for the potential promise of mediocre sex.

She is a single mom

Red flag. Means she makes bad decisions and is probably damaged goods. Also a not-insignificant chance the baby-daddy is still lurking SOMEWHERE in the picture.

she let's out that she was dating a guy who lives nearby and they had sex at some point. I was upset about this but realized it was dumb and if anything, lets me know she should be an easy lay at this point.

No surprise, AWALT. If you got upset, refer to above. How much of yourself are you giving up for this out-of-state single mother that you are emotionally invested enough to give a fuck?

And just to make it clear. If she says they had sex 'at one point' then it in all likelihood means that she's banged him several times, and possibly other guys she is not bringing up. She could feed you the small truth to avoid the big lie. And if THAT thought upsets you, again... too much investment.

She banged someone to have the kid, what do you really think her N-count is at by now?

I'm pretty sure she has a wild side with her history,

She does. See above.

but is in that wall territory

I... really hope she is a fucking hottie because you are ignoring a few clear red flags as to her personality and prospects.

Forget emotional tampon, she may actually have her eyes set on you as a potential BB provider.

My issue is with how to play it, as we may meet up somewhere later this year, as she is lonely and such.

Same as any other girl. Make your intentions clear from the start, use game, kino, escalate, display your SMV and amused mastery. Swat the shit tests (which you have been doing thus far, right?) and prepare for and power through any LMR.

But please ask yourself if the chance is worth it. Consider that she may just let you take her out on your dime, use up your time, and then kick you out of her place when you attempt to close.

Remember nothing that she has said matters, it is really, truly, ONLY about what she actually does. She says she's 'cool with' FWB, but she isn't willing to travel out to you (probably uses the excuse of the kid, right?) and IF she does have sex with you, probably won't let you do half the shit she has done with other men.

I don't know your personal situation so I won't say you should hard Next her, but if she is taking your attention from other women in your life or your own self-improvement, then you need to start giving her less of yourself, NOW.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hey guys so I'm starting to understand the importance of plate spinning and am starting to put it into practice. My problem is that I've been really only been meeting new plates off of tinder and POF. I know that social circle is the best way to meet new women, but I'm 28 and out of college and work independently. Most of my friends and fam moved out of my area. Fortunately I live in a big metro, but meeting new friends in general is not my strong suit. What's the best way to build a strong social circle with both guys I can respect and call friends and also with women that can be potential plates?

[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hobbies. Groups. Sports teams.

Try meetup.com and you'll find some groups to get you started. I also recommend checking out things which tend to be masculine/male-heavy environments. (Hence sports teams as one starting point. Groups to do with cars and racing etc can be good too.) It all varies from city to city so you'll just have to do your research and go from there. It took me about 9 months to revamp my social group, so don't expect any sudden or quick changes for this. Friendships take time to build. I was (ironically) discussing this with a new friend of circa 7 months the other day... how everyone in these groups seemed to expect instant deep friendships without needing to invest any time or making any effort to build a bond.

[–]Mrstack97 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

What do you guys do to cope with depression? Since I started seeing the world in this red pill way it has made me sad about how society and women work.

[–]flowfall0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Listen to the black phillip show if you haven't already. And give it time. At some point you'll get tired of being sad, something will click and you'll find a way to make the best of what you understand of the world so far. Then you compromise between what you thought you wanted but might not be possible, and the freedom and possibilities in this new perspective.

Shit doesn't always go the way you plan man. This is just a fact of life, you haven't actually lost anything, you've just come to the realization your expectations may not be all that realistic. Ditch your expectations, there's a lot of fulfillment and happiness to be found once you do.

[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

A.K.A. The bitter taste of the red pill. Doesn't have to make you sad. Give it time, that feeling will pass. Especially if you're using the knowledge to bang girls.

My mantra is "they're not evil, they're just as lost as I was, but now I know the truth". Spin the plates and you will find balance.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

How many plates at you guys spinning? I'm going thru a divorce and have an 18 mo daughter and I'm spinning 3 currently. I just wanted to know how many is too few or too many to handle before I drop one.

[–]Joseph_the_Carpenter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've found with my (limited) experience that for me personally 3 is too many but 2 isn't enough. There's no reason you have to see them all equally. One you may only see once a month, the other two once a week. If you find yourself too busy then you can pull back frequency instead of numbers.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I used to spin 3 at a time.

[–]1starting_oveRP1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's up to you to know how much is too much to handle. If you feel like your life is getting too busy to be able to handle 3 plates, drop one!

If everything is going fine, keep it up. You know your life better than us here, so just be honest with yourself about what you do and don't have time for.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, yes I'm going to keep the status quo but just not let either of them try and take any MORE time than they already do. If I let one move up notch I'll have to drop one.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]kazaul0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

High sex drive? He's higher SVM? She's not worth the permanent investment? Sounds like RP truths wrapped up in BP ideology.

Her perception is that she's the "best" he can get. He seems to knows that isn't true, though he's socially conditioned to say otherwise and is trying to reconcile those two parts of himself. She seems to not believe she can get anyone with a higher SMV and is struggling in dread.

The 'narrator' is advising male logic. She is speaking female logic in her (written?) question. They are talking past one another. It isn't about honesty or who fucks (or doesn't fuck) around. It's about her perception being at risk... and her looking for external validation, or at least some indication she's "just as good" as the other chicks who are threatening her 'position' with a (perceived) high SMV man. The narrator isn't saying what she needs to hear. It will most likely lead to another messy breakup.

This is a great example of male / female communication gone wrong. There's no point to girls going to males for advice, and no reason for males to do the same in inverse. Unless you can read / speak both languages, it will always result in confusion. I guarantee she will not know what the fuck to do with the narrator's response as it is 'objective'. It isn't speaking to her on an emotional or personal level. Thus it's worthless and will be disregarded.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I feel like my game is stuck and can't improve because the things I say "dry out" a conversation, and drive it out of possible seduction. I love talking about things like how life should be lived, realizations I've had, books I've read, etc... because I actually find these conversations fun for myself.

Its as if these things kill off any seduction vibe in the interaction, and trying to add back in physical proximity/touching at that point seems too awkward - the girl already sees me as this mature, sensible guy, but not the bad boy / seducer who makes her imaginations wild. I wish there was some guide to tell me what sort of conversations to avoid.

[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

As someone who runs a sort of intellectual rebel vibe in his game, I'd advise steering clear of intangible philosophical stuff except for one-liners to be used at her expense (demonstrating how her brain is vastly inferior to yours.) You can run game while talking about things like books... but typically you want to head towards other topics. I'd say the dynamic is more important than the topic... however if you're trying to run something a little more intellect-heavy, then try looking up some stand up comedians who do witty life observations. You can start incorporating that type of humour into your game, but never stop the kino. NEVER! Experiment with where you're dismissive and combative to find the sweet spot where you'll cause tingles from demonstrating your dominance and superior wit. These should help you deliver more concise responses which have a bit more punch to them. Try to keep her talking, keep the pressure on her to perform for you - not the other way around. Save the deeper intellectual back and forths for your male friends.

Also, change your look to appear less mature and sensible and add something in as a peacock that says I don't give a fuck about society. Don't look like an intellectual. Your brains alone will demonstrate that. Look like something else and you'll come across as an unknown quantity that possesses mystery and potential for greatness - this has huge allure for women because they just NEED to figure out your real value.

Finally, go read my TRP Field Toolkit series. It covers all aspects of base game in one simple guide that gets you from date to f-close, navigating the vast majority of obstacles which can come up in an evening.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is excellent, gave me some perspective to think about. Thank you.

[–]Yepbro1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hi Nexus2045.

She should be talking twice as much as you. Ask her questions about her.

In regards to talking about yourself, do it sparingly. Reveal interesting stories about your life. Don't have any interesting stories? Go and do some interesting stuff.

[–]SatanAscending2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Have you heard of laconic speech? It's not easy, I know, I struggle with that myself, but it may be the answer you are looking for. The more you say, the less weight your words hold.

Also: people like talking about yourself, and other people affairs don't interest them much, unless they have something to gain off of it. Especially when you are talking to a stranger or a relatively new acquaintance.

Next comes a question. Do you have a clique? Close friends you can share your views and feelings with? If so - those are people you can share those conversations with - people that actually give a shit about you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks I will check that out. One point is clear - I'm probably talking too much about myself or my affairs and interests and that isn't helping anybody.

[–]idgaf-0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm probably talking too much about myself

This is exactly right. People are interested in themselves, not you. Also words you say can never impress them. They know too well (from their own words, probably) that words can just all be made up.

Also the things you like to talk about all seem to be about the future or the past. Try focusing your mind on the present.

Just be curious. It's much easier. Ask her about her day, how she ended up where she is, what her orientation is toward the present moment, things like that to get started. Low investments, like easy to answer questions, lead to higher investments like personal questions. Get her talking about herself. She'll be invested in the conversation, she will be qualifying to you instead of the other way around.

[–]floriemorie 2 points2 points [recovered] | Copy

any of you have or had a pectus excavatum ? I want to start getting muscles but i don't know if it's better to have an operation first or if it will look good on the chest anyway. thanks.

[–]IlluminableRed9 points10 points  (3 children) | Copy

How to find balance?

The Red Pill freed me from the clutches of my own prison that I have made for myself inside my own mind.

It also freed me from society in most part. Well... No one can escape either himself or society. But he can control the way they influence him.

But I have a big problem. I thought for a long time what my life aspirations should be. Should I live merely to serve myself? I fell into a pit of nihilism quite literally. I couldn't really find a way out.

But I had an epiphany one day. That living as a private individual without a care about the rest of the world would never make me reach my potential.

If I live merely for myself then there would be no point to living life. I could commit suicide and nobody would care. Life would be empty, because l wouldn't have anything to strive towards.

So I decided one day, that living to further my own human kind is the only worthy goal. To make us better. To make sure that we survive. To reach towards peace and help others optimize their minds.

But as we know, Evolution made our minds to survive. Not to be happy or peaceful.

We are only meant to survive, the rest is up to us.

So my question is this; How to balance my idealistic thinking that is driving me forward, with the reality of how humans operate, without being disappointed. I don't want to waste my life chasing after the "wrong goal".

I am flying in the oblivion of nihilism right now. I am free now. And yet, now I see that to reach anything I need a goal that will push me.

Thank you.

[–]MalVortex11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

So my question is this; How to balance my idealistic thinking that is driving me forward, with the reality of how humans operate, without being disappointed. I don't want to waste my life chasing after the "wrong goal".

This is an insidious fear. It has haunted me for most of my life, and has cost me far more than I'd have liked to overcome. "If my life's purpose is mine to define, then what is the 'correct' path for my life?" is one of the fundamental questions to ask while exploring existential nihilism, and you must understand: there is no answer.

There are a couple contributing factors to this fear we could examine: analysis paralysis, fear of failure / fear of success, but one in particular stands out to me - protecting the ego. Its important to understand the world, its history, the physics of the universe, the origin of our species and of life. There are infinite things to learn in our brief time here, and they are each intertwined. The problem is... we start to inject our own ego into the equation. We want to solve a BIG problem, to be remembered through time for having made a difference worth retelling. We want the honor and glory of being a Patton while having the intelligence of Newton and the savviness of Edison. We want to be fighter pilots and video game devs and MMA champions. We want to date that cute latina and buy that big new TV. We project our ego into the world, and we want it all.

A million paths lie before us; like grains of sand flowing through our fingers, we fail to catch any of them. You can live to save the human race or to invent some marvelous invention or achieve financial independence or to sleep with a thousand hot women - its really all up to you. Your mission can only be defined by you. The source of your happiness and discipline can only be defined by you.

It's not enough to be prepared to die - you must be prepared to be forgotten. Prepared to have everyone you've ever known, and they've ever known, be forgotten. Even our species will, one day, be forgotten. Swept up into the sands of time.

When you finally leave the thought-space of eternity that man will never understand, you should shift that focus back into your own body. Your gene's know what it means to be alive. Millions of years of vitality course through your veins! Weightlifting or other strenuous physical activity would help restore awareness to the physical now. Lifting won't answer your existential fear, but it will reveal that there is more to your existence than the ego of the Neocortex.

You must start by drawing smaller circles (a term I'm adapting from Josh Waitzkin, The Art of Learning: A Journey in the Pursuit of Excellence). You're worried about saving the entire human race in your post! That kind of endeavor is truly beyond any of us, maybe even all of us. Collapse your circle, draw it around yourself, and then start with today. What can you do today to make your life better? What can you do tomorrow to make your life better? Over time you'll start drawing larger circles, your experience will feed back onto itself. You'll find the answer to your question, but only after engaging with life.

A word of caution: when you define your meaning through or for external means, it can also be altered beyond your control. This is as true for people as it is for money, relationships and nationalistic politics. Happiness, contentment, discipline, indeed your very mission - each must come from a place of strength from within you and for you. Ayn Rand might be an author you'd enjoy, as many of her works deal with a sort of 'philosophy of the soul' along this line of thought.

You'll excuse me if I cap this off with a fitting nerdy quote:

Don't try to be a great man, just be a man. Let history make its own judgments.

[–]IlluminableRed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you for this incredibly insightful response. "Drawing circles" so to speak, does indeed sound like a good idea to sharpen my focus and make my existential fears "loosen themselves".

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

In very much the same place as you, brother. I used to be incredibly idealistic, and it was what motivated me to get up in the morning. But TRP has shattered my worldview, and as I try to pick up the pieces and form a new one, nihilism seems most congruent.

Nihilism isn't useful, though. It doesn't push me to accomplish anything, or even help me figure out where to direct my energy. I have all this freedom now, plus plenty of resources from the self-improvement parts of TRP. But I have no idea where to direct them.

tl;dr I don't have the answers but I'm commenting here to express agreement and get thread notifications.

[–]aequitss0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

When spinning plates and your plate bitches about her ex because she mis characterizes his actions as asshole behavior ( he was asserting his boundaries in stating that she gained some weight and doesn't find her as attractive anymore ) consequentially made her hit the gym more but he dumped her lol before he could see progress. I thought I was being neutral by saying shit like " eh, I mean there's just a better way to get his point across rather than being a douche about it " but reading posts suggest that this incidental test was to gauge how I'd respond and what category I fell under. ( AF vs BB ) I'm somewhat satisfied with my answer but subsequent shit tests threw me for a loop and thus I imagine colored the previous shit test BB. That said, I do think there's a better answer and am curious how you guys would handle that shit test in isolation and how you'd handle it In the context of a barrage of standard shit tests you receive during LMR. ( how many girls have you fucked? I'm not like this. i want to but I can't. we are not having sex etc )

[–]1starting_oveRP1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"OMG he was such an asshole when he told me to lose weight"

"yeah, totally, my last ex wouldn't even let me do anal."

I've gotten the "i'm not like this" and "i want to but i can't" and "we are not having sex" I always just agree and amplify. I did see something great on here recently which was

"we're not having sex tonight" "the night is still young, you should be optimistic"

[–]Kisame_X0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the advice but I was thinking in terms of male female relations because my goal with a plate is to make her just that

[–]5639673250 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

What if she says she wants to wait for someone special/someone who will love her/etc. to lose her v? Do I say I'm that special person?

[–]1-drukpa-kunley-2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Why is it important to you what this one particular girl says?

Are you asking because you're in love with her (oneitis)?
Are you asking because you don't know how to blast past LMR?
Are you asking because you're bargaining for sex and this is her covert communication that she doesn't find you attractive?

[–]5639673250 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I asked out of curiosity when was the last time she kissed and ended up telling me stuff about the guy but she didn't want to lose her v to a random friend like him.

[–]1-drukpa-kunley-3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is probably true. She wants to lose her V to the biggest badass in your social group. Are you the biggest badass in your social group? If not, then she probably doesn't want to lose her V to you.

It still sounds like you are trying to negotiate attraction.

Go out and make yourself a more desirable man.

[–]Heathcliff-- 2 points2 points [recovered] | Copy

In the dark triad, what does "psychopathy" actually entail? I'm sure I'm not going to start axe murdering people but how can I be psychopathic in a productive way to achieve my goals?

[–]Code_Bordeauxx0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

In the dark triad, what does "psychopathy" actually entail?

What you must first understand is this: when it comes to getting results (becoming successful!) there is always a 'shortest route' that can be taken. However, just like paving roads, going for the straightest line can have some serious side effects. It's likely you'd need to cut straight through other people's property or destroy other obstacles that are in the way.

In human interactions, these 'obstacles in the way' often present themselves as moral dilemmas or principles you value. And although they certainly serve a purpose, especially in the long run, they will hold you back.

Where does phsychopathy tie in with all of this? Simple. The psychopath doesn't care. That's the defining trait: a lack of empathy, they are born without the ability to feel it. In the mind of a psychopath, morals or principles aren't a consideration. And so, all that matters is the result and the quickest road that leads to it, leaving a trail of destruction behind.

how can I be psychopathic in a productive way to achieve my goals?

Stoicism is the answer. But first, let me make it very clear that you will not be able to become psychopathic, even if you wanted to. You have to be born that way. But it is also not advised, because even though it will give you the most results the fastest, you will have no safety net whatsoever (remember that trail of destruction?) coupled with the restlessness caused by a continuous need to replace resources (exploitations) that dry up. Besides, it's good to realise there's more to life than achieving results. For example, if you value things like friendship as I assume you do, you'll need to sacrifice some opportunities for results in favour of good relations with people you care about.

So, stoicism. This means you don't abandon your emotions, but instead you suppress, control and rationally factor them in. It means you put your own needs first, but also consider the needs of those around you occasionally (depending on how close they are to you) to maintain good relations. It's good to have principles and a sense of morality, but you're advised to choose them carefully and to discard the rest, again knowing that whatever you choose to hold onto will hold you back to some degree.

[–]superduper151 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Psychopathy exists on a spectrum, everyone possesses psychopathic tendencies in various amounts, some MUCH more than others. It's not black and white.

In short, the role of psychopathy in the DT is a lack of empathy in regards to achieving your goals (whatever they may be). If you possess high levels of psychopathy you may feel totally okay ruining someones career or manipulating people to achieve certain ends. If you possess low levels of psychopathy you may try to achieve the same goal in a different way that doesn't evoke empathy.

Implementing it in your daily life boils down to your own convictions and morals. If you don't naturally possess psychopathic traits I wouldn't go around trying to force it

[–]larrythetomato0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There isn't a direct meaning, just like colloquially theory means guess, but in science it means a tested explanation.

My understanding is that sociopathy is physical lack of empathy, and psychopathy is someone who can only gain pleasure through other's suffering.

It should be noted that other colloquial meanings are related to morality: a sociopath is someone not concerned with societal morality. A psychopath is someone who purposefully breaks that morality. Of course since your are on TRP you know how bullshit morality is, how it is a method of control.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

My understanding is that psychopaths feel dampened emotions. For instance, while you might feel a flood of endorphins while killing someone, the psychopath feels maybe a tenth of what you feel. This isn't something you can learn, it's a medical condition.

As for psychopathic behavior, the best way to emulate this is to learn to control your fear/fight/flight response to situations. This is what makes psychopathic tendencies useful, because an actual psychopath won't have to deal with as much fear, whether it's approach anxiety with a girl or performance anxiety in a competition.

So if you learn to control your body and mind, and thus control your fear, you can learn to emulate a psychopath's dampened emotions. I think the key is mindfulness/meditation, but this is a road I haven't fully explored so I can't personally vouch for it.

[–]1-drukpa-kunley--2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy

What makes you think you can't achieve your goals without being psychopathic?

[–]Endorsed ContributorHeathcliff--0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy


What is this?

[–]1-drukpa-kunley-0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Again, why do you think psychopathy is the answer? Psychopathy is just a set of behavioral traits.

For example, you can become a wealthy man by being an honest businessman or by being a manipulative psychopathic asshole.

But everything has it's price. Even psychopathy. Look at what happened to Theranos and Powa Technologies. Those businesses were run by, in my opinion, psychopaths. Yet the both detonated in a spectacular fashion.

Psychopathy doesn't ensure success. And being an honest businessman doesn't automatically mean failure.

It seems like you are trying to apply psychopathy as a quick-fix solution to an as-of-yet unknown problem. So first, figure out what you actually want to change in your life. Then figure out if you are lacking traits that are preventing you from achieving those goals.

If you want to actually be involved in helping people, then psychopathy isn't the answer. If you want to be a master pimp, then yes, having psychopathic traits can help.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Think a lot about your heart rate and learn about what makes it go up. Those are the things you are fearful of. Try to become desensitized to those.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy

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[–]yaysmr1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Innocence is an attractive trait in women. Experience is an attractive trait in men. Conversely, innocence is not attractive in men, experience is not attractive in women. These two traits are almost mutually exclusive, particularly in the sexual context. The more one increases their experience, the less they maintain their innocence.

The woman who has been fucked up and down and every which way by dozens of men, who has done the most depraved sex acts before she turns 24, who has literally had 3 or more men fucking her at once... well she can't even begin to lay claim to 'innocence.'

Of course, they're damn good at pretending and projecting an aura of innocence even when they have the thousand-cock stare.

There are lots of other biological/social/psychological factors, but end of the day, a man who wants to come home to an adorable princess who turns into an insatiable whore only for him is looking for a girl who still has innocence to give. He wants to be able to guide her and be her 'first' so that he knows that he and he alone has seen this side of her. Maybe.

Now, there are definitely men who prefer the insatiable whore who has plenty of experience and enjoys sex and is open about it, but those women are never suitable for LTRs.

[–]2PragmaticRedTruth2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only in an LTR. Because what this shows is that she is promiscuous. When Oxytocin (the bonding hormone.) is released with many different men, the affects it has on her aren't as meaningful as if it were with 1 man. It's harder to pair bond. She has most likely also been alpha widowed, meaning; you are just the beta bucks or reliability card and won't reach a status of "the best fit" in her mind (speaking in terms of hypergamy here.). It's like she's walking around bitter that she lost her highest reach, and your just a fill in.

With all this said, it's like anything else; it's why we look at people's history when they get a job, or when we are trusting them with something. It teaches us about a person, their habits, and their intentions.

If she has a high N-count, she is much more likely to cheat and cuck your ass. It doesn't necessarily mean she will, it just means the chances are higher. And why would you want to have an LTR with someone you constantly have to run "dread game" TM on? It's exhausting.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's not bad, unless you're looking for a long term relationship.

[–]5639673253 points4 points  (9 children) | Copy

When women say they don't like players/act upset when you say there are other women in your life, are they shit-testing?

[–]2PragmaticRedTruth0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

In a way, yes. They are reaching for control to try and get you where they want you to be; holding onto their pocket. They want to take back something. It's more like they are "testing" your frame, than anything else. So, yes, a shit test / comfort test rolled into one. Your answer should be one that is in line with your reality so that you remain in control of the frame.

[–] points points | Copy

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[–]Swoledinger2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is fundamentally wrong. This is a basic level shit test that is easy to pass, and really only stands to up your SMV in her eyes. She's simply testing to see if she can shame you into submission. Any variation of "hahaha you're the jealous type eh? That's cute" will work.

If you are actually hooking up another women you are presenting hard evidence of your SMV. Women do everything to beat out other women. If you are fucking two women they will start attempting to one up each other to demonstrate they are the 'best'. You have two women competing with each other to win your affection. All you have to do is sit back and give positive reinforcement.

The key point to remember is they are competing to beat each other at that point, not to win you. You just get to be the judge.

[–]5639673250 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Do you mean like I'm not supposed to tell her if she asks? E.g. two nights ago I told her that when I'd get drunk I'd make out with her and slap her ass. She asked when was the last time I slapped ass and I said last night. We made out that night (wasn't drunk) but stopped replying to my (2) texts after. What if she says she wants to lose her v to someone special, u/pragmaticredtruth?

[–]wimmyjales0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah, never really reveal that completely. She wasn't asking for an answer, she was asking to see where you would step next. She's trying to find out if you can be sucked into her frame. It's not good if you let that happen, because then she has to lead the dance and I think you'll find women have little patience for that.

[–]5639673250 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Would saying something like "lost count" or whatever A&A/pressure flip suck me into her frame? How?

[–]2PragmaticRedTruth2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Here is how TRP works;

I have morals, you have morals, everyone has morals. For each person, these morals will be different, whether slightly or extremely.

TRP is kept "amoral" so that way we do not get into a discussion of what is right and wrong. I cannot tell you what you "should" do, nor should anyone else. All I can do is tell you what I would do and my reasoning for such.

I tell all my plates and FWB's that I fuck other girls WHEN they ask me. If they broach the topic (I make it quite obvious.) I look them dead in the eyes and say, "I sleep with other women."

I do this because of two reasons; one, I don't want lie to her. Two, I don't want to get caught up in some bullshit and make myself look like a fake when she finds out from some other girl or person. I tell her, hold frame, and if she walks (which they have before.), I have abundance and say, "okay, bye bye." If she is still sitting there or talking to me after I tell her, I invoke her emotions and change the topic to make her attracted and pulled towards me. She wants to be there, she just isn't saying she does.

In other words, who cares what she says about her V card. You told her, because this was in line with your morals, now she needs to know you aren't budging (holding frame.) and won't come chasing after her. So if she is still sitting their, change subjects and make her feel how she is suppose to around you. Watch what she did, not what she said or asked for.

[–]breakingbadrule 11 points11 points [recovered] | Copy

I know that RedPill is about sexual strategy. And what we do to increase our SMV also improves us in other aspects of life. So please bear with me when I ask this.

I just don't like to talk to people from my beta days. (I am not an alpha. Far from one. I've just realized that in my current state I cant demand respect.) It's like, no matter what I do I know I will never gain respect from them. I am isolating myself from these people. And everyone else non important in general. Just trying to work on my shit. Holed up in my room, studying, working out once a day, studying more, eating, sleeping. Is this healthy? That feeling of worthlessness, I want it to go away. And I am doing everything I can to solve my problems. Not by 'feeling' bad about them, but by working on them. Will this harm me more than its helping me? Should I keep contact with people from my beta days?


[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You must have a long term vision of who you want to be, and then backwards engineer the qualities and skills you'll need to get there. IE if you want to be a ripped, rich guy working in his dream field of X or Y, who fucks alternative hipster music / artsy chicks, then that is your long term vision. To get there, you can plan out a 2 year physical training and diet plan, a career plan, pick 2-3 skills to master, and so on.

Every single day, because I get the sense that socially you're not where you want to be, you need to practice. Go out and have conversations with everyone. Talk to someone on the bus, talk to someone at the grocery store, talk to someone at Starbucks. Everyday, talk to guys, girls, uggs, old people, cashiers, clerks, professors, coworkers. Just get more socialization in. This is how you develop social skills.

If you do all three - a physical 2 year plan, a career 2 year plan, a daily social skills grind, then in 2 years I guarantee you'll look great, be making decent money, and have a good healthy social circle that generates plenty of lays.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

I just don't like to talk to people from my beta days. (I am not an alpha. Far from one. I've just realized that in my current state I cant demand respect.) It's like, no matter what I do I know I will never gain respect from them. I am isolating myself from these people.

It's a bitter truth, but this is the way the world works. Good, decent people, old friends of yours, will become surprised at the changes you are making and because the new, better you is so different from the version of you that they came to know, they will presume it's a phase. For the sake of their own ego and comfort, they will try to force you back into the box they've put you in, because the average person is not invested in improving themselves, so they are quick to pour scorn on those who do to protect their own egos. Crabs in a bucket mentality.

So, in that regard, you're making the right move. If you want to, hang out with these people again once you have made noticeable changes to yourself and carefully watch their reactions. If they are negative about it, drop them from your life. If they are positive, keep them on, but be wary of telling them the source of this change before they're ready to unplug. Many people, no, most people will never be ready.

Just trying to work on my shit. Holed up in my room, studying, working out once a day, studying more, eating, sleeping. Is this healthy? That feeling of worthlessness, I want it to go away. And I am doing everything I can to solve my problems. Not by 'feeling' bad about them, but by working on them. Will this harm me more than its helping me?

That's monk mode, and you're doing it right. It can be tough on people who are more extroverted by nature. There is a limit, which is basically the point at which you really start to crack up and feel lonely. That is when you need to cool off and have a good time with other people, a social outing. If all your past friends are too beta to hang out with for the reasons outlined above, then one solution is to attend/join a local club or society or something. Breach new ground, new social circles, and start afresh with new people. Proportional to your improvement, they will treat you with more respect when they first meet you than you have ever experienced. However, if you are strongly improving all the time, you might again reach a point where they are uncomfortable with and envious of your improvements, and you'll have to meet brand new people again. But those people will see a much more impressive, respectable man than ever before, and will treat you accordingly.

Hang in there, man. Keep on improving yourself, your mission and the building of yourself to complete your mission is priority #1. If it gets too much, find some people to hang out with and blow off some steam. Also/or, fuck the nicest piece of ass you can game, strictly as a ONS if you're still in Monk Mode. Also, a very good source of social interaction (you don't want to isolate yourself too much for too long, or you'll forget how to talk to people) is talking to cashiers, taxi drivers, randomers, fellow shoppers, gym rats etc. That, along with daily interaction with other TRP members on here, was enough for me because I'm pretty introverted by nature. YMMV.

[–]Surfincloud91 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Keep doing you. Studying and working out will benefit you in the long run. You sound like leaving your friends really bothers you. You should keep in touch with close friends. If they don't show you any respect, then they are not close friends. Everything is temporary.

You need to find happiness within so that you can change your reality. You CAN NOT find happiness in other people or try to fuck girls to be happy, that's not how any of this works. You need to get hobbies, be healthy, have a career that you enjoy and focus on yourself. Get tinder if you want to try working on your game. Go on as many dates as possible. I try to set up at least 2 a week on the weekends and it has increased my confidence ten fold.

[–]breakingbadrule 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

It;s not that they don't show respect or intentionally disrespect. But there is this, you know, "I am better than this loser" vibe. And yes, being human, I am envious of other people's success. I want that success. And I am working for it. It's just that keeping everything inside and not talking is a bit unnerving/frustrating at times.

Hobbies. Next to none at this point of time. ust focussing on my shit and browsing TRP while I'm having dinner. Will hae to pick up something though. Maybe an instrument? I dont know.

Dates. I can't get them man. I'm socially awkward and fat. My SMV is negative. So yeah, right now all I want to do is get back on track. Work on myself.

Anyways, thanks for the kind words.

[–]rombios0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

if fat workout, its summer buy a cheapo bike on craigslist and go ride around your local state parks for at least one day on a weekend for at least 3 hours or collapse (whichever comes quicker)

if socially awkward go to bars some distance from your neighborhood, after 11pm. buy a drink every hour, try and talk to people (theyd be mostly drunk and no one would care) stay till closing. as weeks pass get their earlier and closer to your neighborhood. alcohol nulls the over analyzing part of your brain at least until you can get it under control

bro am an introvert by nature (oddly enough the only one in my family of social butterflies). still i put myself out there .. i will let nothing in this fucking useless universe prevent me from getting what i want or at least trying.

i got off anxiety disorder medication a decade ago .. cold turkey .. just told myself "ride out the pain", " force myself out there". it helps that iam tall athletic build and i have always worked out.

listen, deal with the weight and your confidence will improve. go to bars after 11pm and even if you are a mute i guarantee you women will come up to chat and from their to bang.

dont go after great looking females at first .. go for the average and be on the lookout for cougars and soccer mom bored housewife types. practice and release your frustrations on them, mutual satisfaction, after that youll have that "abundance" mentality they talk about on here.

am no expert and have much to learn bur i have also had my share of fun times before and after my failed marriage.

Get a hobby. Girls are no substitute for hobbies, interests, pursuits, GOALS

GET IN SHAPE FIRST, cardio till you keel over or drop the pounds p.s. round is not a shape :)

[–]Surfincloud90 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah. Lose weight and everything else will fall into place. Hobbies is apart of focusing on your shit. You need hobbies. Even a sport, or go hiking, or read a book. It'll bring much needed happiness to your life. An instrument is great.

Seriously, I was 30 lbs overweight and this past year I got to 10% body fat and I am absolutely ripped. Now I see girls checking me out at the mall, I go on dates and the girls will not shut up about my body. It feels so good. Being socially awkward happens, that's not an excuse as much cause you just gotta deal with it and practice on it.

[–]1CoupDeGrace221 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you're going through hell,keep goin'.

[–]slothsenpai0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

What's the exact difference between a nice guy and an asshole and how do I get to that asshole level that women fawn over? I consider myself friendly enough with them, I unapologetically objectify girls by making comments about their bodies and asking for nudes etc (though they eat it up know that I'm a hot enough guy) but even so, they still consider me that sweet boy. What makes an asshole an 'asshole' exactly, without the blatant abuse?

[–]EDDbDG0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're just a straight up "ass" if you're an unattractive or obnoxious guy that's unkind for no reason.

Take things like negging and teasing. You can do this if you're an attractive and confident guy that a girl looks up to. But if you were an awkward or just someone that the subject has no interest to... Negging and reading will just make you look pathetic.

[–]mada02070 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You don't want to be an asshole in the literal sense.

Also don't want to put women on the pedestal. Don't filter things you want to say.

[–]Dolphintorpedo0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

The majority of my life I've been the "no filter say what's on my mind" person. Many tend to find my jokes targeting in a way and crass. Could someone point me in the direction of what type of humor attracts and what kind repulses?

Ex. 1. How can you be a Mexican and not know how to swim 2. .... Probably because you have a stick up your ass

Might it be the tone?

[–]cockstantino0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Depends how and when you say it. I would only say jokes like that when having a 1 on 1 chat, and acting like I'm genuinely confused why she can't swim (and of course laugh at her when she realizes that she was going to give a genuine answer before what I said sank in (pun not intended)). I would also only bring it up when something comes up about swimming or Mexicans. That's a perfect joke for her to hit you playfully while acting mad, forcing her to kino. Also makes you sure she's into you if she reacts well.

[–]Kisame_X3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

How do you build attraction as a high school student

[–]Dolphintorpedo3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Work out and focus on the university you want to attend. Don't worry about whether people are attracted to you, worry about your career. Sooner than later you will see people start flocking to you because of your life choices

[–]cantFindValidNam1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Can we have a community effort to translate rollo's writings to a simpler, more friendly english? I feel like RP content is too valuable to let language get in the way.

[–]RedEyesBlueShades0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That would be dumbing it down. And actually contrary to TRP's core lesson - Improve yourself.

So take Rollo's articles one at a time, and read them slowly. You will learn not only about TRP, but some decent English, too.

If you can't digest it, you're not ready to consume it.

[–]rp_phoenix 2 points2 points [recovered] | Copy

Okay, here I go. My school prom is next week. The girl I'm going with, I've known for about a year, I think she showed interest in me, I just didn't see it then cause I was dumb. She broke up with a guy about a month ago, and one of her friends asked to me ask her to prom, and took her up on it. What expectations should I have for the night? Is prom really the sex fest it's made to look like? And how should/can I increase my chances?

[–]Subtletorious3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Is prom really the sex fest it's made to look like?

No. Most participants are too goofy or timid to know what they are doing. Plus, about 1 in 5 women are having their period - on the rag - shark week - got the painters in. Unless you're keen for your red-wings nothing is going to be happening.

And how should/can I increase my chances?

By already being in some type of escalating relationship with the lucky woman in question (which does not to be your case). Having logistics for after-party.

The Prom is just a social function, just like any other social function. It is not meant to be a hook-up. Sure, you might get laid, but you can also get laid the day before and the day after. Don't take the event too seriously.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Is prom really the sex fest it's made to look like?

For the top 20% of adult males at an event with adult females, every event is a sex fest.

And how should/can I increase my chances?

Read as much of TRP as you can. The single biggest problem with newcomers is they are too impatient. Learning to be a fully masculine man takes a lot of time. This prom date is not the endgame. This girl is not a unicorn. With that in mind, read as much as you can (there are too many angles for me to TL;DR a whole sub) and try to fuck this girl. If you do, great. If not, fine. Plenty more out there. You're just starting in the world. The biggest mistake you could make is thinking this one girl is special/valuable/different. This is like your first baseball game. You have a very long career in baseball ahead.

Welcome to reality.

[–]rp_phoenix1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I like this. I'll just have a good time and see what happens. Thanks

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just have a good time, & escalate kino. And if y'all are alone at a certain point, escalate and see if you can fuck.

[–]RedDeleter1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Wow, that's a lot of questions, this should be done weekly at least.

Okay, mine one, a small background first. Know TRP for a while, learned cooking, learning programming, diet on point, lost 20+ pouds of fat (and got like 25 more to lose until 10%bf). I migrated from PUA, so i know game theory. Don't think i am in the 20% right now. Now I got a job in campus as a janitor, being a student myself. Even if it's a low SMV job ( i keep this one because it gives me most money i can get as student in my country without investing my time + i live in same campus so i save a lot of time ).

Still got a question about game. I can pull about 2-3 phone numbers from chicks weekly in job. Drunk ones, sober ones, doesn't matter. They can throw IOI's at me (touching me, eye contact, even leaving friends just to talk with me). After i get number and want to meet them, they lose interest. They don't answer or say they don't have time or other shit. Where is the border? I just can't find this spot between losing interest and or honestly having no time.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

In your absence, the memory of her attraction to you is drowned out by the endless cacophany of attention, validation and nonsensical praise meted out by her friends, the shitty content she guzzles online, the innumerable thirsty betas who she sees ogling her etc.

You should aim to make a stronger first impression (as do we all, never get complacent) and also to close with a firm, short term plan. Escalate from getting a number to setting up a date very soon after. As ever, forget the no-shows and keep your abundance mentality.

[–]Redasshole1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Question about upbringing. People often say that growing up in a tough environment sucked but that it gave up the strength to overcome obstacles or the will to improve their life and make it as great as they possibly oculd (A. Schwarzeneger said that).

I had a very soft and protective upbriniging. I was not allowed to leave the house, I wasn't allow to cut my own meat until lage 14, I was sheltered and protected. How can I turn that into a strength?

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Put yourself under the gun if nobody ever did it to you in your youth. Challenge yourself and give yourself responsibility. Undertaking somewhat dangerous work with something like power tools is a good start. It's not exactly juggling flaming swords but you can easily fuck yourself up with a circular saw, angle grinder, chainsaw, welder etc. You will get a bit nervous when whatever tool you're using is making a loud noise and shooting sparks everywhere. While being careful what you are doing, you face that risk of injury and overcome it by being careful and knowing what you're doing. If nobody ever taught you how to use dangerous tools like this, teach yourself.

The essence of it is this; put yourself into more situations with risk involved, situations that make you nervous about more than just social harm, and realise that you get used to it. You get less anxious around loud machines and spinning blades. You also gain useful skills.

[–]RedDeleter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

IMO you got so much to learn and achieve everyday that you should push yourself and look at outcome of those "new" for you experiences.

You will probably see that almost everything you do, don't really have negative outcome and thinking about it will make you want to try to break your frame, the one you were raised in, where you felt safe.

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[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy

Needless to say it was awkward as fuck telling that girl to go home.

This is your problem. You're too anxious about letting a girl know she's slacking and needs to step it up. Be more commanding. After all, if you tell a woman "get on your knees and give me the best blowjob you've ever seen in porn", the worst she'll do is walk out. Abundance mentality, fuck that bitch, plenty more around.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Thing is my dick went soft because she requested music which is a completely nonsensical reason to be turned off.

No it's not. She should have that hunger in her eyes for your validation. She should be doing things to the best of her imagination, letting her raw fucking talent take hold. If she's half-hearted I'm not interested, and you shouldn't be either.

This girl obviously has a high partner count. Now you know why the CC ruins women; it takes away from the magic of them being ours.

I still think it is nonsensical for me to not enjoy getting head unless its a new girl or extraordinary head game.

Eh. Well, getting laid too often kills the enjoyment quite a bit. I'm pretty sure if you got decent head a little less often it'd be that more exciting. If you're really slaying like you say you are then it wouldn't surprise me that you'd get bored of the same stuff.

Fuck it I'm going monk til summer.

Isn't that technically in June? Only a couple of months. Go for it, and emerge a greater man than before.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Sounds like you're into being the dom. You're focused on her submission as well as your own satisfaction. Maybe explore that side of sex, it can be healthy. It's also possible you have a need to defile and demean women that is more centered around malice and revenge than sexual gratification, which usually means you still have anger/bitterness to women in your past.

I can't see into your head so it's up to you to find out which it is. Perfect project for your monk mode. Introspection, when done in a pragmatic, humble way, is good for a man. Meditation is utterly indispensable for learning about yourself. Meditate on it and try to question yourself as honestly as possible. The answer is in your head right now but you're not tranquil enough to hear it. Learn to meditate properly and you will hear everything.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Didn't think you could tell that from a couple posts here. Is it really that obvious?

Eh, without turning into a shithead I like to think I'm smart. There, I said it.

I like hardcore porn and mimicking it.

That's the caveman in us all. Nothing wrong with it whatsoever. You've probably noticed that women enjoy it too. It's almost like humans have been fucking like wild animals for 99% of their evolutionary history...

Guess the problem is evident after all: I am a Dom at heart and dislike sex where the girl isn't totally submissive... Or maybe hard porn has ruined me.

Eh, I'm similar but perhaps not as pronounced. Being dominant is by no means fringe. It's by far and away the most common kink, one step away from vanilla sex. Nothing wrong with exploring it with a chick who's down with that, many are. Game some chicks with tattoos and/or piercings, they tend to be more firmly into it. A word of warning; there are a number of these women who have problems that make them this way. The healthiest way to enjoy it is to find someone level-headed and mentally healthy, who also likes to be a filthy whore for the right man. It's not bad or unhealthy if you go about it the right way. I'm no expert, but you should look into it a bit.

I never meditated. Where's a good place to start? Is there an app or something? (Serious)

Google fu. "How to meditate", "meditation for beginners" etc. I don't go in for any sort of complex method, I just turn my attention 100% onto calming myself. Lowering my heart rate, slowing my breathing, calming my mind. I find mindfulness techniques extremely helpful - one trick is to think about every part of your body that is touching something. Is your foot flat on the floor? Is it pointing straight away from you or to the side? Which muscles are tense? After a few minutes of building a sort of perception of exactly what my body is doing, I find it easier to analyse deeper thoughts, and pay more attention to them. That's really what meditation is, in one key point; focusing your attention on just one thing at a time.

The human brain didn't evolve to do that easily. We evolved to be alert and watch our backs. When we manage to do it, we find that whatever task of understanding we undertake is much easier with 100% of the conscious mind working on it. I'm no expert on meditation, far from it. YMMV.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

If you are a heavy porn user, maybe you should stop using it for a time. See yourbainonporn.com series on erectyle dysfunction (ED)

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know man, seems good to me but who knows? It can never hurt to give it a try. And that's all I can think about. Maybe other RPers will have more ideas.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I have this girl in my hometown that I'm gonna fuck during the summer. She keeps sending pictures, alot of them nudes or 'makeup on point'. Nudes almost every day. How should I respond? I pretty much ignore her random snaps,never initiate contact, and respond: cute!, sexysmirk emoticon, perfect, kissing face to the rest so she's encouraged to keep sending(Had to reqest wet pussy pic, she denied first but sent the day after).

Should I expect to keep that up for every day til summer? I don't want her to be discouraged to send, and I don't want compliment inflation

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I've sent her like 3 pictures. What do I send her?? I've sent one upper body pic, and one dick pick and one back pick. I mostly tell girls that I can just meet that I don't have snapchat, so I don't use much snap

[–]fanthor1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

i hurt a girl, real bad.

she obviously still loves me, but she also hates me at the same time. too much of a blunt asshole.

the relationship wouldnt work anyway, so its not like i'm looking to get her back.

still i need to see her everday, and i would like it if she isnt sad anymore because of me.

do i chalk it as a loss? that i would have to take responsibility, be silent and live with the newbie fuckups i made?

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

still i need to see her everday, and i would like it if she isnt sad anymore because of me.

Women are capable of having the emotional shit beaten out of them and getting over it to the same extent that men are capable of having the physical shit beaten out of them and getting over it. Of course I'm not advocating that you do that, just saying that whatever you did, unless you fall firmly into the category of "abusive" (as in, the law has been broken) it isn't half as bad as you think.

Simply stop giving a fuck. I guarantee you she exaggerates the hurt when you're around. When you leave the room she's probably like "eh, he was a dick". When you walk in, however, she'll give you the eyes of a battered long-term abuse survivor. She's fine. Even if she's not, you shouldn't care after you have analysed what you did wrong, decided how serious a trespass against your values this thing was, and resolved not to do it again. That's all a man can do.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I hurt a girl, real bad.

So what? As long as you didn't break the law....girls hurt guys all the time. She loves you and hates you, it's good, you are the chad asshole. You just need to fuck her good every once in a while.

If you have feelings for her better to cut all ties right now. If you don't, you will become needy and beta and she will do to you 1000 times what you did to her.

[–]TimeToLiveForMe0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

I don't know if it's especially relevant to my question but I'm 24 and recently divorced (don't ask, stupid BB/blue pilled man story, no kids though, so win-some, lose-some) I've discovered the red pill in the last 6 months and so much of what it tells me resonates almost too perfectly with my recent experience, and relationship failure. As a 5'6" guy, I still struggle with inferiority complex over my height, I'm going to the gym and should soon have a very nice software engineering job lined up, so I'm currently working on the parts of my SMV that I'm able to. But what advice can you give on jumping this hurdle I'm having over my height?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I'm your height. And I'm chubby. And I have no money. And I'm still in high school. and girls still love me, for the most part.

If a short chubby kid with a Lil bit of acne can have up to 8 different girls wanting him, so can you.

[–]TimeToLiveForMe0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks, Good to know success is still being had out there. I'm sure you know this, but I'll add my voice all the same, being chubby is within your control, never forget that. Make the gains in places we can right?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Haha I know. Started working out two weeks ago, I'll be getting a gym membership soon hopefully.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]TimeToLiveForMe0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Hah. I've never really considered the Macklemore haircut before, but maybe I should. I think I'm doing alright with how I dress, but I'm sure it could use some work. Is malefashionadvice good for that, or is there a better place to look? As for confidence, well, one of the guys in my group of friends is apparently an inch or 2 taller than me, but I've heard others describing him as having "short guy syndrome" and then, having them be surprised to learn I'm shorter than him. So I guess I'm not doing terribly in that regard.

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[–]dmac7770 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

ok, been lurking and reading for a few weeks now. Had a stupid thought, and perhaps it is a good question?

What would happen if, in a state with common law marriage, a guy and 4 girls moved into a house on the same date.

After the sufficient period of time according to common law, one of the girls decided to move out, and take the guy to court.

Would the court be forced to endorse polygamy, as if her "marriage" is judged to be legal, then the other 3 women would have a similar claim? Or would it be thrown out of court, thereby providing a safeguard against divorce?

Just a thought, thanks!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

From the limited info about this I've read on TRP, the common law thing only applies if you've basically taken all steps towards marriage except actually having the wedding and signing the papers. Engagement, telling people you're getting married, etc

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points | Copy

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[–]dmac7770 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the info! Not paranoid, just an old man looking forward to retirement and possibly having some fun messing with the system! :)

[–]DruZod0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Hey there, I'm a guy with no game. Excuse my poor English. I got a question about escalating.

I've been in this situation several times: In classroom, mostly during a break, girl sitting next to me catches my interest. Since I'm not the best for starting conversations, the best thing I can come up with is something about the matter we're studying. For example, something like "how do you calculate this?" or asking for some formula (STEM student here). Perhaps not the best introduction, but it works nonetheless. After getting an answer (I always do), I go back to minding my business because I don't know what to say next. Then, usually between 2 or four minutes after, she starts again with a similar question. I guess it's easier for her since the ice was already broken. Then again, I answer and we go back to our business. Then either of us ask again, get answered, and the cycle repeats itself until I get to go. Technically I'm having a conversation, but it's an impersonal conversation, not something that would put me in a position to invite her to hang out or give me her number ("Hey, do you know why x leads to y? what's your number btw?"). My question is how do I go from an impersonal conversation like that to a more personal conversation (like just a casual conversation)? Also, despite it being impersonal, am I wrong to assume that it could be an indicator of interest the fact that she (re)starts the conversation several times? I mean, sometimes the questions are so obvious it appears like they ask them just to give me a chance to do things right. Or that could just be my optimistic imagination, of course.

I've also been in one situation in which this conversation actually escalated from impersonal to personal. Like, talking about subjects not related to class or work, calling each other by our names instead of "hey", and some occasional flirting. The thing is, I did not make the escalation here, she did. So I still have no clue of how to do it by myself. I also realized going personal was not the endgame, but just one stage ahead of impersonal. We were still talking only in the classroom. I suppose the next stage would be going from casual conversations in the classroom to hanging out or something. I also don't know how to escalate there.

I don't think I'm attractive at all (I would consider myself quite ugly when it comes to the face, tbh), but I think I'm getting a lot of chances I'm not taking because of being so socially stupid. I wish there was some sort of manual that explained all of this things. Is there any recommended reading for folks like me?

Also, this is a bit meta, can theory weekends become a thing here? I find it a great and productive idea, this kind of direct interaction helps a lot when it comes to learning.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Hey there, I'm a guy with no game.

Having this mentality makes it harder for you to improve. Think this instead;

"I am a man who has yet to learn strong game" or "I am a man who has always previously had weak game". There is a big difference between thinking "I am a fuck up" and "I have fucked up".

Since I'm not the best for starting conversations,

Again, change this internal monologue to "I have not yet learned to be good at starting conversations."

My question is how do I go from an impersonal conversation like that to a more personal conversation (like just a casual conversation)?

With boldness. Law of Power #28 "Enter action with boldness." Just think of something personal you want to know about her, and ask her just as casually as you'd ask "Could you pass me that pen?"

Also, despite it being impersonal, am I wrong to assume that it could be an indicator of interest the fact that she (re)starts the conversation several times?

Very much could be. You should just presume that it is interest. If you're wrong, you lose nothing. If you presume it's not interest and don't chase, then you lose a lay/plate.

I don't think I'm attractive at all (I would consider myself quite ugly when it comes to the face, tbh), but I think I'm getting a lot of chances I'm not taking because of being so socially stupid. I wish there was some sort of manual that explained all of this things. Is there any recommended reading for folks like me?

That "manual" is right here. The Red Pill. The only mistake you can make with such a wealth of knowledge in front of you is trying to absorb it all too impatiently.

Relax. You found all the answers you ever need about women. Now sit back and watch a few seasons pass as you slowly test this information, observing female behaviour everywhere you look on a daily basis, and absorb it into your core, until one day it's all automatic. Read, comment and interact on here until you don't consciously think about these things any more, you just know what to do with women. That takes time. Invest that time in yourself.

[–]DruZod1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hey man. Thanks for taking your time. From the things I've heard about this sub, I was expecting more like a "noob gtfo" answer.

You mention impatience as a mistake when acquiring knowledge. I acknowledge that is indeed a mistake, yet I find myself committing it all the time. There's so much information, and I often feel like I want to absorb it all at once. This becomes "paralysing" and, as a result, I absorb nothing. What approach should one take in such a situation? How to stop feeling like I'm running short of time?

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey man. Thanks for taking your time. From the things I've heard about this sub, I was expecting more like a "noob gtfo" answer.

The world needs more fraternity. More men having each other's backs, because we're all in the shit together, as men. I espouse that idea and try to advance it in my own life. You're welcome, brother.

You mention impatience as a mistake when acquiring knowledge. I acknowledge that is indeed a mistake, yet I find myself committing it all the time. There's so much information, and I often feel like I want to absorb it all at once.

I used to be the same, partly why I understand it.

This becomes "paralysing" and, as a result, I absorb nothing. What approach should one take in such a situation? How to stop feeling like I'm running short of time?

That right there is pretty textbook anxiety. Now, anxiety is a sort of technical term in medicine, very well defined. I am naturally quite anxious from an abusive childhood. Lots of twitching, endless (and I mean fucking endless) mental activity, very high metabolism, difficulty getting to sleep etc. If you have anxiety, it could be so many things. Something is stopping you from relaxing, and you need to find out what that is and address it. It may be your environment, PTSD, trauma from any event in your past, or maybe even just a natural tendency. Whatever it is, trust me, every single aspect of your life will improve when you learn to start managing it, easing it, and just being calmer most of the time. If you know what causes it, think about that and find a way to overcome it. If you don't know, try meditation to go deeper into yourself. I used to be so scornful of meditation. Holy shit, life-changing moment the first time I felt my mind slow to walking pace. I felt like a logical God, compared to a lifetime of being amped up and anxious. Practice meditation and focus on everything that you fear, dread or are paranoid about.

You may also just be under a lot of stress generally. That's the most generic cause of anxiety. Again, meditation. If none of the above works, see a doctor or, if possible, a male, RP-like therapist. No female therapist can help you as a man, unless your issue is so generic that you don't need a therapist. They just do not understand our lives nearly enough.

[–]HearTheRaven15 points16 points  (4 children) | Copy

Not a question, I would just suggest that AutoMod post this thread daily.

[–]InvictusCor 6 points6 points [recovered] | Copy

Agreed but weekly, daily is a bit too frequent. We don't want too much clutter on the front page.

[–]HearTheRaven1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You may be right. Either way, I'd like to see one of these threads always visible on the TRP front page...I wouldn't want 5 different NSQ threads at once, but I also wouldn't want a weekly thread to get buried and forgotten until the next one.

If one NSQ thread is always visible, I think it would clean up a lot of junk.

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[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There was a sub /Manosphere that didn't really go anywhere. I also created but haven't really set up /RedPillAcademic, which will (eventually) be geared towards many of the same issues treated here but going into more depth, and with more sophisticated and detailed explanations than the pragmatic ones we see around here.

The biggest reason I haven't worked on my sub much is I don't want it to become a haven for pretentious pricks who think they're "too smart" for TRP, nor do I want any of the discussion to be unnecessarily dense or inaccessible to the public of TRP.

If you want a sub to exist, you can always create it yourself and put out a call for mods. If you come up with something decent and show dedication, I have no doubt that the mods here would be okay with a promotional post or two spreading the word about this new sub, once you've put a good amount of work in. Talk is cheap.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I say post a quality thread about that to start a discussion. I think most of the people here are interested about that as well.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The Misandry Bubble, while it has a couple discrepancies, is a great place to start.

[–]Alpha-Bromega0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Is it necessary for a man to sleep/plate many women before settling into an LTR?

Having found TRP whole in a relationship, I always wonder this. I didn't have much success with women in high school and early college. I work on myself every day and so far I've been really good at applying TRP to my relationship. Maybe older red pullers can shed some light on this issue.

Thanks in advance

[–]ManOfGrapes2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The usual advice is having experience with plates before moving into LTR. This is due to getting used to the shit/comfort tests employed by women, the more you get them the better you get at dealing with them.

Having said that, from personal experience, it isn't necessary for it to happen. TRP, as you've discovered yourself, can improve a relationship almost immediately. The catch is to apply it gradually and covertly, so that there isn't a giant backlash from your SO, i.e. you display too many alpha traits suddenly, she will seek her beta comfort elsewhere.

Lastly, having a higher n-count than your SO is something to consider. Obviously, you don't want a CC rider for your LTR, but when it comes down to it, she will not respect you if you haven't pulled women before her.

[–]Cpt_Charles_Rhyder 14 points14 points [recovered] | Copy

My stupid question, is TRP worsening the problem of finding quality women? For example, we moan the loss of loyal women who can pair bond and how terrible high n-count women are but then we go look for plates which increases the count in women even higher. Plus, if you're following all the advice, you're more likely to make her an alpha widow. It seems like we're making it worse for ourselves as TRP becomes more mainstream.

[–]FortunateBum0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Quality women marry wealthy men while they're still teenagers. The women are teenagers, not the wealthy men, necessarily.

So no. Quality women were never on the carousel to begin with.

Just my opinion.

Get rich, find a high school girl. Seinfeld almost did it. Musicians almost always do it. Lewinsky thought he was going to do it.

[–]TheGatherHunter1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, I guess this is true to some degree. But without that practice, you might not even be able to take advantage of that high quality woman and lock her down. There's also the case to be made that you're simply more likely to find one if you sleep with more women. Looking for a high quality LTR is a numbers game.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy

It's a good question, though not every man here concerns himself with it. For those of us who do, I made a post called The Tragedy of the Pussy Commons and why I apply the Camping Rule to relationships. As RP men, we can enjoy multiple plates and girlfriends, yet with the same amount of effort, either leave a trail of better-off women, or a trail of female wreckage.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (7 children) | Copy

But you're eessentially taking away value from her each time you fuck her And if you're the most alpha dude shes ever been with, you alpha widow her.

Seems contradictory to "leave her better then you found her".

[–]cockstantino0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

This is also the problem I have with TRP which is why I haven't used my newfound seduction powers for personal benefit (yet).

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Why not? Fuck these hoes. They love being ruined.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Exactly. Morals are something that hold you back. The only kind of moral code I have is about how I expect other people to treat me.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

Morals tend to be a pillar of male friendships. Don't have morals towards women tho.

Compassion is useful to form relations with men, its useless to form relations with women.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yes. I once taught kung-fu to a guy I just met for an hour. I expected to get nothing in return. He invited to the restaurant with his friends and it was one of the best nights of my life. With the right kind of man "give and you shall recieve" is true.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

This how I am. I have no reason to make enemies with other dudes unless they're on that hot shit & physically attack me. I'm generally a pretty nice, cool funny dude with guys. Girls will tell you I'm an arrogant asshole who doesn't take anything (them) seriously. Its a funny distinction

I see a lot of dudes who first get into asshole game and think that because it works on women, they should treat men like shit too. And then they wonder why they have no bros. TREAT YOUR BROS RIGHT, TAKE CARE OF YOUR GANG.

As for bitches? Treat them like the filthy disgusting whores they are. And they'll love you for it. Women hate compassion from men. When you're compassionate towards a woman it makes her think you're weird or low value, because she knows she's a worthless piece of shit so why would you treat a worthless shit good? They rationalize it into you placing them above you, and then they see you as beta for it.

Never let a bitch get in the way of your brotherhood. Dont be attached to these chicks, share them with your brothers etc.

[–]Shade_Raven3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If not you it'll be someone else. Modern women can't be saved

[–]vverons 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

One more stupid question. I can not get rid of my onities. I can't even hear the chicks name without getting my stomach in knots. Worst part is people tell stories about fucking her in front of me and I have to sit and pretend it doesn't bother me when it does. It's been 7 years and it doesn't go away? Any tips on making this go away?

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Time heals everything. If after 7 years you are still this way, it either means it was one of your first love and/or you didn't take action to forget her.

[–]Battle-Scars4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Come to the realization that she didn't give a second thought about you the day after you broke up. All the fantasy scenarios you've been dreaming up about her feelings for you or her returning to you were never true. Feel the pain of rejection, grind your soul up, cry, punch a wall, whatever. Then wake up and realize this:

You and only you have been letting her control your thoughts and emotions for 7 years and that has not allowed you to be free to be fully invested in a relationship with yourself or anyone else. Love and respect yourself more than that and know with your hard work you will find someone better suited to you. Find out why you relive the negative cycle of that relationship instead of exploring new relationships and stop punishing yourself.

It's difficult and only you can do it, but you can do it.

[–]Manmore1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

I don't know if this belongs in this thread, but here it goes: do you really think women have a lower sex drive than men? This is the only thing I've read here that I'm not convinced about.

Many times the girls I'm seeing want to have sex more than I do, and others I've talked to (old plates and random girls in relationships) often say their guys don't want to have sex with them as often as they'd like. At the same time, I'm wondering if it just is a way for them to keep their men around.

[–]Redasshole1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

They have a weaker sex drive because they have less testosterone.

However, because of what society encourages and because of feminism, girls love to have sex for fun. It's nothing to them. It's like playing a game of call of duty. They will do it because they are bored and want to pass the time. It's a default thing they do. They do it because they hav ebeen told that slutting around is the way to go. They want to feel the feelz. Biologically, they have a weaker sex drive but they seek it more than men because of all the other psychological reasons. Plus orgasm doesn't exhaust them like it does for men.

[–]1Entropy-72 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Women have higher standards compared to men. Wanting to fuck and who they want to fuck are two different things.

Women have ASD, men don't. They need plausible deniability of their n-count and how much of a slut they really are. It's all about appearances.

[–]bokehnikon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

  • Observe their actions and not their words more closely
  • Female desire for sex is like a volume knob, while for men it is an on/off switch
  • Female sex drive is different not lower or higher than a man's.
  • Women do learn early to use sex as a weapon/tool to control men.

[–]mexaboy4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nope, in my opinion that's a myth (kinda). I think they have as much appetite for sex WITH MEN THEY CONSIDER FUCKWORTHY as we do for hot babes. The difference is, they are much more resistant to lowering their standards than we are, but when they do land a guy they're genuinely horny for, oh man is it sometimes hard to keep up!

[–]KingKoopa18930 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy

Something else that confuses me is apologizing. I'm not really active here, but I get the feeling that apologizing is not looked to well at. Forget when dealing with a woman, when you are dealing with another man, and you KNOW you have made a mistake, do you not apologize? When another man wrongs you, do you not expect an apology because it's not the alpha thing to do, or do you call him out?

[–]Redasshole1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you made a mistake, you apologize ONCE.

But you don't apologize to a woman. Why? Theoritically, you don't have to apologize to anyone. But you have respect for your fellow men so you apologize to men. Women? They don't deserve to be treated with respect. Plus, the thing is, with women everything is a power play. It doesn't matter whether you were right or wrong, or if she was right or wrong, if you apologize, to her it's a sign you surrender to her frame. Even if to you it's only apologizing, to her it's a sign that you are submitting to her frame. So you never apologize to a girl, even if you are wrong. The exception being if you have something to lose by not apologizing.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Username is apt haha.

So you never apologize to a girl, even if you are wrong. The exception being if you have something to lose by not apologizing.

Each to his own. TRP is divided by questions like this, so while I agree that you apologise when necessary to men, it is up to OP whether or not he decides to offer the same courtesy to women, while following the rule that it is done only once, when really necessary, and then the matter is considered resolved.

I choose to offer women this courtesy. I find that it's harder to remain stoic and uphold an IDGAF mentality when I'm carefully trying to dodge conceding any points to a woman. I apologise concisely when I fuck up in a meaningful way. It doesn't happen often. Some behaviour toward the beta end of the spectrum works well as the thin velvet glove over the hard core of Alpha behaviour, for me and many others. Again, really it's up to OP what kind of man he wants to be. Either way is workable.

[–]Red_Swords5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think the issue is that a lot of people, especially if they've been beta for years, decades - potentially their whole life - is that they apologize way too much.

It isn't that apologizing itself is inherently bad, but an apology is essentially communicating "I submit to the fact that I'm in the wrong, and your forgiveness is important enough for me to request it outright."

In some situations this is good. If you fuck up at work, for example, it's generally better to own your mistake, and do what's necessary to make it right. If you genuinely wronged someone because of a misunderstanding or miscommunication, it's usually better apologize, too.

But if you turn a corner while walking and suddenly find that you're in someone's way, you should say "excuse me," instead of apologizing when you've done nothing wrong. Or someone asks you for a cigarette, your answer should either be a yes, or a no, because you have no reason to apologize or explain yourself for denying a stranger's request.

It's not that apologizing is inherently bad - never apologizing for anything ever will actually damage your reputation, in many situations. But over-apologizing communicates a frame of perpetual weakness and submission. Context is key.

In regard to your other question, if I feel I deserve an apology and don't receive one, I general won't call the person out. I continue to be a cordial and act like an adult, and make a mental note that this person should never receive any of my help, my time, or my resources in the future.

Essentially, I just 'remove them from the tribe,' for lack of a better term.

[–]102117991075 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

Forget the "alpha" bullshit for a minute.

There is nothing wrong with acknowledging you made a mistake. If you are truly wrong, it shows character and you'll be respected.

When I made a big fuck up at work that cost the company thousands in customer payments, I owned it on a call with tons of directors and senior vps. I didn't say "uhm.. I don't know", or anything. "Everyone, we found the problem. It was my fault, it was missed during a config review. There is no excuse. It was human error." If this is not how you're supposed to do it then it contradicts my experience. Two directors emailed me after the meeting saying I I owned the meeting floor and nobody could shoot me down because I took ownership. To this day people talk about that day and how I handled it without collapsing with a hear attack being questioned by VPs etc.

Apologizing to another man is fine if you do it with humbleness but also not dragging it out. Apologize direct, short and sweet and learn from it.

With women, don't say sorry. Refer to the 16 commandments of poon. I say "I didn't mean for it to make you feel that way". That's it. Not "I'm sorry I'm sorry honey".

[–]KingKoopa18930 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks for rhe response. Glanced at some of the 16 commandments. Interesting stuff. Will give a full read after I finish browsing this thread.

[–]102117991071 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you haven't already, it's absolutely necessary to read all the theory posts posted by /u/redpillschool today and yesterday. Don't browse. Read all of it with intent.

[–]KingKoopa18931 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

What is TRP view of seeking professional help for relationships/life (therapy)?

[–]Redasshole5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't get a female shrink. Mine tried to fuck me up in the head even more and to steal my money. Don't give up all your defenses in front of the shrink and find a good professional person who will truly help you.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Therapy can be of great value, provided the therapist is good. Get a good grasp on TRP, then do your best to find a MALE psychologist who is fairly redpill. Psychologists associated with Robert Glover (Author of No More Mr Nice Guy) would be ideal.

[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't do it' you'll be pussy whipped. If you must spend money in counselling, throw 100$ at Chateau Heartiste and expose him your problem. That guy knows his shit.

[–]redpillyoda2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's a ton that you don't know about your own psychology that could be limiting you. Getting professional help like a psychologist can add a lot of insight that you didn't know about yourself.

[–]Dec30challange 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

Advice that is repeated here ad-nauseum is that guys should focus on themselves and women will follow. My question is how does one strike a balance between this passive approach and actively pursuing them.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

From the TRP handbook "don't even bother trying to approach girls until you are high value".

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

In the initial stages of your personal development, focus on yourself but be on the look out for targets of opportunity who give IOIs. Once you are in a groove then you can start actively deploying game, but don't sacrifice continued improvement until you reach the goals you set for yourself at the beginning.

[–]bokehnikon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Some degree of "pursuit" is required because in every culture, the man makes the move, the man escalates. However, you do it in a way that suggests you aren't supplicating her, trying to impress her, making her number one in your life. Rather, you are the prize. She is just a side distraction to you.

Hope the above doesn't sound too abstract. So, for a concrete example: Let's say there's a girl you're interested in. You're trying to nail down a date with her. She's a little wishy washy, says this Friday isn't good, how about next Friday? A guy that puts himself first will say, "Sorry, I have a business trip that whole week and I'm going to be exhausted. No good." Period. (Also, the "business trip" angle shows you're busy focusing on your career) A guy that puts girl first will be like "Sure! Sure! Let me clear my schedule because I want to be with you."

[–]mexaboy5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Pursue them on your free time.

[–] points points | Copy

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[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nope. It's unstoppable. Just be thankful you got the news, take advantage of the milk that the cows give for free, ride the pussy wagon until you find a worthy woman (they are still out there even though the numbers are dwindllng), make her work to earn your commitment, and raise your boys not to be pussies and your girls not to be feminists.

[–]RedSugarPill0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Is there some way to easily retrieve deleted comments? Sometimes there is a response to a post, but the original comment is missing. I understand there are at least 3 different kinds of deletions, including comment removal by the user, comment removal by a mod, and wholesale removal through banning, but I'm not sure about the last one. Are there any differences between these types of deletions (for the purpose of seeing what was written)? Is there a way to easily source deleted comments using 'Undelete', perhaps through some kind of plugin such as Reddit Enhancement Suite?

Edit: thought of a 4th possibility, wherein the user deletes his account, but I think those comments stay put.

Much appreciated..

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Question for successful plate spinners:

How often do you spend time with women? I have recently adopted a day-on-day-off rule, where every other day I don't have someone over. Anyone adopted a similar regimen?

[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Do whatever the fuck you want, try not to see each plate more than once a week or they get clingy.

Do you even have time for more than three girls?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


I own a small business that only takes up about 10 hours a week. I plan my life around my free time, so yeah.

[–]redpillyoda1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I hang out with a plat once every week and a half and I have three.

We usually grab ice cream or something and fuck at my place promptly after.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

So, you're seeing a girl once every 10-11 days, and you have three, so every 3 or 4 days you're seeing a girl?

[–]redpillyoda0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, about that much. I could see them more frequently, but I keep busy with my passions.

[–] points points | Copy

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[–]Redasshole1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

In high school, I began working out without telling anyone. I was wearing large clothes so almost nobody saw my body getting bigger. When I took of my shirt for the first time, I was with two girls. 2 weeks after they saw my abs I got a threesome with both of them. I never had sex before. But the best was when I got strong. I could press their hips with my hands, they would feel the strength and I swear to you, the look of fear/desire they give you is priceless. It's like "OH MY GOD THIS GUY COULD BREAK ME IN HALF...." and the girl is being turned on by it. Especially priceless when done on feminists.

[–]cockstantino1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm sitting at 140 pounds but I'm shredded af (9%). One day I happened to be at the pool around people who have never seen me shirtless. Let's just say everyone treats you different and it's a good thing.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Brain: "Oh look, he's talking to a girl. Heart, you know what to do."

Heart: "Got it, beating faster. Veins, you need some more blood bro."

Veins: "Damn, I feel that adrenaline."

In other words, my heart begins pumping really fast when I'm doing something as simple as socializing. This doesn't happen to all girls, just most of them. How can I calm the hell down?

[–]Poke_Red0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Read "The Charisma Myth" by Olivia Fox Cabane

Regarding social anxiety, she states to characterize each feeling and become comfortable (being uncomfortable) with each.

Practice. Feel each body part's rhythm when you're nervous. Stay like that and understand that's how you feel. Soon you'll expect those feelings and act despite them.

I found a quick summary here: http://thematinggrounds.com/the-charisma-myth-book-notes/

[–]Redasshole-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Go to a martial art class and get your face punched a few times.

Meditate every day.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Soldier through it for now. Experience and successes with women will make it go away automatically.

The quickest fix I could recommend, spin at least 2 plates in the SMV range you can manage, and use that sense of abundance as a foundation to reach for the higher SMV levels with a newfound internalized IDGAF attitude.

[–]WhySoRuff1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your body is simply anxious about what it has little experience with. The hotter the girl the more the brain thinks your not equipped to handle talking to her and the more anxiety you'll feel. Keep on approaching.

[–]vverons 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

How can I bring up sexual things in conversations to show my sexual intentions?

I have been trying to do simple keno like touching hands, lower back, legs, etc.. But I feel like it's going completely unnoticed and I feel the vibe is turned to just a basic conversation.

I am learning a lot here over the few year and I have been cold approaching more and more but never been able to get a f. Feeling like no matter what I do I can't get a win.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just relax, let go of everything and let the animal inside you to speak openly without worrying about what she will think and oh my god she is going to reject me.

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sometimes I will use a lot of innuendo and double entendres. Towards the end of the conversation the women will say things, then check themselves and back up because it could be taken sexually. It's a very round-about way of sexualizing the conversation but sets the stage.

[–]redpillyoda1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would recommend talking about relationships between friends or people you know and transitioning to sex that way.

"Mikes girl is crazy. I heard she wanted to drop candle wax on him. I would never want that shit done during sex." (expedited version)

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Try to engage women's emotions. Be a bit passionate, a little larger than life. Tease her any chance you get. Dominate and lead as much as you feel able (basically tell her what to do. takes practice to get this bit right). Do not appease, supplicate, care too much what she says.

Getting fucked by cold approach is harder than at parties and in your social circle.

Bringing up sex isn't that hard, but it's not necessary either. Girls will do it if excited or attracted. Emotions are more important, especially at first.

[–]saintjohn27110 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Hi can you go a bit more into engaging women's emotions. I have a problem trying to develop a connection with women when it comes to their emotions. I'm quite green-minded and I just feel like it always gets in the way of how to understand and make women happy, etc.

Any other tips to understanding their emotions?

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do read my first reply a bit more.

More than that.... it's about being emotionally stimulating. Which means you phrase things to appeal to the emotions rather than logic.

Female emotions aren't that different to men's.... but they're faster, more of them, and more necessary.

Basically you want to make her feel.... ideally non-artificially.... ie as a response to how awesome (and uninvested) you are, rather than artificially (by saying things designed to make her emotional). Although the latter is a lot better than nothing.

It's better to make her angry, indignant and outraged than to make her feel nothing.

[–]Momo_dollar4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah I've noticed this. If you don't mention sex girls will sooner or later and in different ways bring it up themselves. Almost like they want to remind you that they are sexual beings or get worried that you don't find them attractive

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Almost like they want to remind you that they are sexual beings or get worried that you don't find them attractive

It's because they're thinking about it, so it tends to creep its way into the convo :)

[–]Momo_dollar1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

What does it mean when a girl makes it obvious she is giving you the "I'm assessing you" look? Is she really assessing you, I always assumed girls do that naturally and if they were they consciously doing it they wouldn't make it obvious.

My reaction when it happened last week was genuine uninterest, even thou she is probably the hottest girl in the place I was consulting at. Basically I just looked and acknowledged her presence with a facial gesture, and then looked to my right to greet the person at the desk on that side.

[–]WhySoRuff1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Sounds like a shit test. She is saying "are you sure we play in the same league?"

If you get uneasy (body language), you just confirmed her suspicions. Next time, smirk and approach.

[–]Momo_dollar1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I could get relegated a few times and I'll still be several leagues above her.

[–]WhySoRuff1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Physically you might be, mentally and experience wise you may be lagging which comes through in your body language. At the same time she may be genuinely interested.

[–]Momo_dollar1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That was the first and only time I've seen her so far so will have to see if she's there next time I get work there.

[–]rpthrowitout0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

How to overcome a weird oneitis-like mind trap? I was involved with someone for a couple months I know through friends. It started with me taking her to an event and sleeping with her that night (so I did something right). We kept seeing each other until she very suddenly avoided me and my advances entirely. That was a little while ago now. I've only seen her a handful of times since then among those friends, but I cannot shake her from my mind.

Logically it makes no sense. I find her attractive but a couple of my friends assure me she's only decent. She was kind of weird, boring, damaged, closed-off, rude at times. Tons of serious red flags. The sex was pretty good but it never got too interesting. I had a hard time making the most of it since so many interactions could get awkward and she could be weirdly picky.

I don't know how to stop it. I think it's partly the suddenness and lack of closure, so I keep going over what went wrong. I've also convinced myself there was tons of untapped sexual potential, which is annoying. But I don't have other plates or enough game to simply move to the next thing. It's frustrating because I know she's not that great, it never got serious and I wasn't trying to make it serious anyway, especially considering the red flags.

Part question, part vent.

[–]rp_phoenix0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you're worked up about it because you haven't had anything like it since. Just try to get out more and meet new chicks, and you'll discover that there's a lot of interesting girls who probably have less red flags and are more enjoyable. Develop some abundance mentality, pretty much. Hope that helps mate.

[–]AnAbsoluteSith1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

TLDR: How do I fully swallow the pill if my personal experiences thus far don't always reflect what I've learned here?

Extremely watered down version of the story:

I have a woman who I have been close friends for years and has stuck around with me through my worst times (cancer and other things). She is the only woman in the past few years who I'd ever consider LTR'ing. She continuously displays good qualities and goes above and beyond for me in her actions. Unfortunately her and her family migrated so it never happened. We stayed close friends and she became my "international plate" ie: she sends me 1080p videos of her doing whatever I ask of her. She saved up and visited me some months back literally just to fuck me. Things continued that way until I stopped it. She starts med school and I start law school soon. Her hope was to keep me there until we're done school so we can actually get together.

The Point is: she has never done me any wrong. As a result I've never gone through the kind of hurt that some other guys in this sub experienced that really woke them up. Everything I've learned here in the past year makes complete sense, but when I factor her into the equation it gets all confusing. Call it "oneitis" or whatever you want but I think it's preventing me from swallowing whole heartedly. What do I do?


  • Take into account cultural differences. A lot of what I described probably sounds like alien hogwash to you because where I live is a post colonial society that is a lot more traditional and conservative compared to the US/western states. It is by no means perfect and hypergamy stirs restlessly in all women here, but there are still pockets of them who are decent.

  • AWALT. Trust me I am well aware of it. Her compliance and devotion for me thus far has only come thanks to finding TRP. If I don't do my part; hold frame, lead her, have higher than average social value, I probably would not have this loyalty. I am well aware that she can just say fuck it and go ride Chad's Dick AirwaysTM anytime she wants.

  • Going to the gym now to do squats. Lord knows I need it. All constructive response are appreciated. Thanks

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have a woman who...

Sure... but this isn't that unusual. She sees you as Chad. Try marrying her and see how long she stays sexual, charmed and interested in you. And you're assuming (but don't know) she's not been fucking other guys and encouraging guys to orbit her.

[–]sacbite-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're learning that all women are not like that. Just like all men are not like that. Red Pill is valuable as a tool for avoiding asshole women. But it's stupid to believe that decent, kind females don't exist. As many of them exist as do decent, kind men. And you've found one. Congrats!

[–]rp_phoenix2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Continue along with TRP principles, it's working for you. The only reason we all fully swallowed the pill was because we were hurt somehow. You haven't been hurt (yet) so it's understandable you're having qualms about going all the way TRP. This isn't to say she doesn't have the potential to hurt you, we didn't think we'd be hurt either. If you wanna forge into a LTR, make sure you have everything in order, continue improving SMV, and be her captain

[–]Future_Alpha2 points3 points  (35 children) | Copy

Question 1 Does one need to be an 'asshole' who doesn't care about those around him to succeed with women? I'm a pretty nice dude by nature and don't usually try to be an asshole to people who aren't an asshole to me first.

Is it possible to be Alpha as well as a nice dude who cares about the girl and keep her attracted to you? Or does one need to go full Dark Triad?

Question 2 I know what to talk about with other dudes (money, women, video games, lifting, philosophy, books, science, etc) but I have no idea what interests women. I don't find conversations about shoes, or who is fucking who to be particularly interesting. So what does one talk about with a woman on a date? I heard that women consider talking about 'smart' things to be boring. Is that true?

[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

You don't have to be a DT or "asshole" to attract women. However, to attract and manage the HOTTER women, the 8.5s and up, you have to not give a fuck about them. They have to sense that you do not give a fuck if they like you, and you couldn't care less if they left you.

This generally will make you feel like an asshole, but it's not really. It's actually you just not being affected by her beauty. Typically, only selfish assholes are capable of behaving this way, which is why they stand out from other male competitors and bag the hotties. But there's no reason good guys can't learn to behave this way and still remain "good guys".

She is going to test you to see how much you care and how much you get pushed around by her being a hot girl. For example, if you've ever pulled her back home and you two are having a good time, put she doesn't want to put out, she's giving you LMR.

What do you do?

I'll tell her that's fine, call an uber. I wake up at 6 to hit the gym so I need my beauty sleep. In other words, GTFO if you're not fucking.

She'll act offended, like I just slapped her. And maybe 75% of the time, we'll have sex. The 25% of the time, she gets offended, like truly upset, and I lose - but see, in that situation, I wasn't getting pussy ANYWAY.

So the not giving a fuck about her route gets me a 75% pussy-rate.

Now, what happens if I care? I say "it's ok I understand we can chat. Let's watch a movie." I make snacks, we watch a movie, the sexual tension eases up. Now, SOMETIMES I can restart the tension and we'll bang later. But usually once she shits on you by coming home with you and then acting like she "doesn't do" hookups, and you buy that and act like it's all good (when she knows you're sitting their wanting to fuck)... you're not going to get laid. I'd say you'll get laid like 25% of the time in that situation.

So being an asshole maximizes your pussy-rate. It really does. You can get laid without it - plenty. But with the hotter girls, when you want to minimize the BS you have to deal with and just beeline to the pussy, then have to FEEL how few fucks you give.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Thanks alot for your really in depth reply.

What I took away form your post was that one needs to be selfish with women.

The problem with being selfish for me is that I begin to feel bad after I while because I feel like I am 'forcing' them to act in a certain way and not taking into account their desires. It can also make me afraid to act because it will look crude or they might not like it. I know this is a problem, so how did you get over this?

[–]the_savvyhead0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Look, if they're still there and you don't have them tied down, they can always walk. If they're not walking, you aren't really forcing them to do much, because they have a choice to leave.

On the other hand, I think something that is important is that even if you're being selfish in some ways, you do need to be aware of their needs (noooot what they say they need lol) and take care of that on your terms. How much you do that depends on how much value she has for you...

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Q1: You need to be assertive, not an asshole. Take control of the situation, don't be a doormat, lead your woman. A prime rule of leadership I learned in the military was 3F: be Firm, Fair, and Friendly.

The other approach is to be that nice guy most of the time but maybe once a week (if you see her every day) or once a month (if you see the girl only on weekends) be selfish and unreasonable and assert your desires against her just to keep her on her toes.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent post. Much thanks. Very insightful. You should make a post on the front page about being firm with your desires.

[–]__Archaeus__2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy


From the answers I read to this question, it seems everyone is saying to find out what interests the women. But, to me, that is the wrong mindset.

What you want to do, is project your passions. You are getting women to be interested in YOU. And/or what your interests are. If they are, they will participate in the convo, or add what they see fit/are passionate about.

You don't want to supplicate to them. What I mean by this; you are looking for things to interest them. Why? You are the prize. And they should be qualifying to you.

As long as you have a positive passionate vibe, women will come to you. If not, perfect. You have weeded out the women that are not worth your time as a high value male.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Very good response. Thanks.

I have interests that I like to talk about, but when I share them with my mom, she says that I come off as 'pendatic'. Someone on here suggested I come off as 'neurotic'.

How does one present their interests in a 'passionate' light rather than a 'neurotic' light?

[–]__Archaeus__2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I used to lose people's interest in the stories I was telling too. And a friend finally bluntly told me; "Get to the point as soon as possible. If people are interested, they will ask for the details."

I have an ability to notice ALOT of details, and I used to provide them in my story telling, as (to me) they seemed relevant and interesting. But, alas, they are not, until you have show people the reason it's worth investing more time in your tale.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That's really interesting. Thanks. I will try that.

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[–]Future_Alpha2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Interesting. Thank you for your response.

I am really interested in science. I always talk about new information that I learn to my mom, but she always tells me women aren't interested in such stuff. So does that mean she is wrong? Next time I am with a girl, I will tell her about the new discoveries that interest me.

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[–]Future_Alpha2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

My conversations were 'neurotic'? I hadn't considered that.

I have no idea how to create an interesting story about some scientific concept. I just tell it like it is, and what I specifically found interesting.

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[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS4 points5 points  (12 children) | Copy

Is it possible to be Alpha as well as a nice dude who cares about the girl and keep her attracted to you? Or does one need to go full Dark Triad?

DT traits are somewhat fetishized by a certain percentage of guys here; they're not wrong in the sense that certain traits are attractive to large numbers of women, however, this is heavily skewed to the low self esteem side of the female bell curve. They become an impediment when trying to attract good LTR material, such as an intelligent woman with healthy self esteem from a good education and upbringing.

Does one need to be an 'asshole' who doesn't care about those around him to succeed with women?

This is a very salient question for those who come to TRP from the "reformed nice guy" categories of men. There are many different competing ideas of what constitutes the most evolved of men. Though many are mutually exclusive, most are not "wrong" per se because different men of different temperaments ascend to different peaks. To give two extreme examples:

  • The Dark Triad villain or dark hero who stands atop a pile of bodies and rules by force and fear

  • The benevolent King who is hoisted atop a pyramid of eager supporters, who lifts those around him to buoy himself ever higher and rules by charisma and respect

For another way of considering the differences, ponder the contrast between aggressive and assertive.

So what does one talk about with a woman on a date? I heard that women consider talking about 'smart' things to be boring. Is that true?

This is very true of party girls and CC riders who are only interested in a quick, no-connection bang. My dating funnel selects for intelligent, educated women, so being able to carry on intelligent conversation on a variety of topics will help you stand out from the crowd, IF this is the type of woman you're seeking. HOWEVER, don't forget AWALT; even the most nerdy woman will lose attraction if your balance goes too far toward beta. Being able to satisfy her craving for Chad Thundercock and going full caveman in the bedroom needs to always be part of your package.

[–]Future_Alpha1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

Thanks for your excellent post.

My parents were very educated and traditional and so introduced me to many 'classic' novelists at an early age. As I kid, I had exposure to the models of manhood suggested by authors like Ernest Hemingway, and Jack London. Even now these ideas influence my views on the matter, but in recent years I have begun to doubt myself. I thought that maybe the idea they present is merely imaginary. For example, one of my favorite short stories by Jack London is this: https://www.gutenberg.org/files/5737/5737-h/5737-h.htm#link2H_4_0012

If you have time to read it, I'd be curious to know what you think and how it applies to what TRP teaches?

This is very true of party girls and CC riders who are only interested in a quick, no-connection bang. My dating funnel selects for intelligent, educated women, so being able to carry on intelligent conversation on a variety of topics will help you stand out from the crowd, IF this is the type of woman you're seeking. HOWEVER, don't forget AWALT; even the most nerdy woman will lose attraction if your balance goes too far toward beta. Being able to satisfy her craving for Chad Thundercock and going full caveman in the bedroom needs to always be part of your package.

I always had the impression that more educated women are not as interested in sex and men that go full gorilla (I have begun hardening my character and getting in touch with the wild side of me...education beats it out of you). Are you saying that is not true?

[–]PoorlyTimedPun1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is completely not true. Often the tamest most demeur people have some of the more wild fetish/bedroom interests.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

I always had the impression that more educated women are not as interested in sex and men that go full gorilla

The ability to carry on educated conversation will set you apart in the dating market of educated women. Full Gorilla isn't always the best opener with these types, but it's fully appreciated and necessary as at least part of your behavioral repertoire. Some of my girlfriends/plates have included teacher, college professor, psychologist, NP, even a hardcore church lady. No matter how prim and proper their social facade necessarily was, all appreciated the hot caveman sex as well as the more simpleminded, hedonistic plates I've had. So, don't assume that!

[–]Future_Alpha1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

Ah I see. Much thanks.

A problem I have found for me with educated women, was we'd have an interesting conversation about intellectually stimulating topics. But when I wanted to turn things to a more sexual note, I did not know how to go about it. Suddenly saying dirty things/innuendos did not seem to be suitable to say in the situation/with the woman. How does one go about 'flirting' with an educated/serious woman and letting her know of my sexual intent?

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

How does one go about 'flirting' with an educated/serious woman and letting her know of my sexual intent?

The exact same way you flirt and build attraction with any other woman! Sprinkle your erudite discussion with standard kino and flirty advances. Many of their male academic peers are socially boring beta men. A man who can keep up with the conversation but bust out the Alpha when appropriate can really slay.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I see. I always flirting with an educated woman would be like James Bond flirting with Vesper Lynd the first time they met on the train in Casino Royale. I am not currently at that level, but to go to a more 'basic' type of flirting seems like it would be really 'jarring' to the conversation if you know what I mean?

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

I know what you mean, but the words of the conversation aren't where most of the flirting occurs; this happens in nonverbal ways during the conversation. Therefore, whether you've connected with a dialysis specialist with references to the inner workings of kidneys, a classical pianist over familiarity with the works of Bach and Handel, or a hippie basketweaver over the comparative merits of jute versus sisal, the way you meet and hold each others' gaze, orient posture toward each other, touch, and kiss have the same signs and cues, and the same behaviors.

Push-pull and escalation work the same with educated women; the words of the conversations differ but the subtext doesn't.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Ah I see. Never realized that flirting actually occurs at a sub textual level.

Also, how does one get to escalating with an educated woman through touch? It seems like they would be more sensitive to being touched and subtle escalation that less education would not notice, educated woman would notice.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Well, the words are definitely different, and the boundaries and timing of various elements of kino are subtly different across classes and cultures. However, the basic biology is the same, so where nonverbal flirting, push-pull, and escalation are concerned, AWALT.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Answer 1. Nobody need to be anyone or anything. You can be whatever you want, blue pill, red pill, white pill, whatever. Stop thinking in 'Alpha' terms. Alpha is just an image there, it's just an landmark. Different people who pass this landmark become different alphas. So yes, it's possible.

Answer 2. Different women are interested in different things. You need to practice. By the way how did you find out what are dudes interested at? You didn't wake up one day knowing all this. So you learn it somewhere. Now you need to learn somewhere about what is interesting for particular group of women.

[–]2PragmaticRedTruth1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's not that women perfer assholes, it's that there are so many nice guys, and barely any gentlemen that command, dominate, and control.

So be an asshole, or find the balance of the gentlemen who is a boss.

I use the 48 laws of power to uphold people's opinion of me, reputation is everything, you want to win people over.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

No. Be a nice guy to men, treat women like garbage.

[–]Self-elected_trainer2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Q2: Women talk about FEELZ™. Good topics to start from are also food, travel, sport, books, adventures etc.

What's more, no one like dates. Just go hang out/eat/have fun with her.

[–]Future_Alpha0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Food? I eat food for fuel, nothing more. Thus I don't understand people's fascination with food.

What kind of books? I like reading older (books that aren't well known by most women) by authors like Hemingway, London, etc. Would such authors/books be suitable to talk to with women? Or should I read '50 shades of grey' and other popular books to be able to talk to them about it?

Finally, whats the difference between a date and hanging out/getting food?

[–]KingKoopa18930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well you don't have to actually eat food to enjoy it. You can enjoy the way it looks (the way it's set on the plate. You may have noticed that desserts have a whole lot of "extra " going on), the way it smells, or just the process of making. There was a show on food network where one chef just went over the science behind a lot of cooking. Pretty cool stuff.

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (12 children) | Copy

I'm usually 7-8/8 1/2"-ish inches erect. I've been jerking off to porn a lot for the last few months, and only reach like 5"-6" now. I stopped watching porn a week ago. Besides that, what else can i do so my dick will go back to its original erect lentgth? Just give it time?

[–]mexaboy2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Troll. If not troll, find a doctor. (I'm a doctor, not the right kind for this question but enough to know that if this is true you should find one)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm not trolling. And I guess I'll talk to my doctor then, at my next check up.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well. if you max errection is 7-8 and you got 5-6 from porn then probably this is not the most interesting porn in the world. Or maybe you got problems - check your cholesterol level.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS4 points5 points  (7 children) | Copy

This sounds more like a case of biased measurement technique. Dicks aren't known to change by that large of a percentage.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

Nah. Used a ruler to measure it. I was usually 7 inches, 8+ if I was really horny. Even took a picture once to show a chick lmao, had the ruler in the pic.

And yeah I know its a lot, but i had been jerkin to porn A LOT, cause I've been grounded so I haven't been able to link up with any chicks. And I have a high sex drive so I'm constantly horny.

[–]Gawernator2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

3 inches off your length? Yeah right dude lol you were just measuring wrong

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I'm not fully hard any more either though. Before I used to get hard intense boners and now they're like 50% semi hard, semi soft.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm not fully hard any more either though.

Well that's a different ballgame. This is an issue for your doctor, not TRP. There might be an underlying health matter affecting this, and if none is found there are treatment options.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think its just Porn induced ED.

[–]Gawernator0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Exercise more and don't watch porn. And find a hot chick

[–]manlykeAbz1 point2 points  (13 children) | Copy

Severely lacking in social skills.I'm unable to hold a normal conversation in school. Anyone know a way to improve my social skills?

[–]1Entropy-70 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Joint he debating team. You learn to think on your feet, speak confidently and even bullshit, as well as learning about logical structures and argumentation.

[–]Red_Swords2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Assuming you're in college, the golden question is: "so what's your major?"

From that point, assuming they're interested in having a conversation, it's an easy transition to talk about your classes, goals, interests, and lots of other things. People love to talk about themselves, and if you're a good listener (use active listening), you can build rapport with people stupidly fast.

[–]BrunoOh1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ask them questions. People love talking about themselves, and you don't have to talk while they do.

[–]autoNFA1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is a good start. It's not for flirting, but works well for getting people to have at least a mildly positive view of you. A lot of conversation isn't about information exchange so much as it is about establishing common social ground.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Read books (from sidebar or from amazon.com) about improving conversation and social skills. There are plenty of them. Then think about what you've read and practice. And read again. Easy peasy

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Stop talking formally, watch the TV shows and the movies, have a common hobby, etc.

[–]KingKoopa18930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not talking formally helped me to at least get conversations to last longer. I learned about code switching, that no one way of communicating is appropriate at all times. I still have problems though. Dudes still rag me for my formal handshake, "we not in the office man." But my weakness is that I prefer formal to informal (for handshakes at least).

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Commit to practising.

Watch what other people do, learn why it works. Copy them to a certain extent, but only the bits you understand.

Maintain friends and family... also maintain acquaintances... and also practice talking to strangers.

Most people suck at the latter, so don't worry about it... but with practice you'll be fine.

Actually the better you get the easier it is - because when you get good, the other person is putting more effort in (due to your higher value).

[–]Ginormousglutes0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Short answer: talk more. What is it you're having trouble with in a conversation?

[–]manlykeAbz0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

My conversations are not interesting.

[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Make yourself more interesting. Easiest (if admittedly not cheapest) - travel. With a very interesting buddy if you have one, alone if you don't. If you travel alone, go to the most shithole place you can find that won't get you killed. That will get you some interesting stories.

[–]102117991075 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks to /u/redpillschool, everyone should be brushing up on all the basics by now. This enabled me to recap some theory and reflect on my LTR and how I believe it works, what I do that makes her till this day, love me(aka love me right now still).

I plan on starting a post or few posts with my observations and what I do. It won't be some googled psychology theory but things I do physically(and emotionally ) to keep the train going. I'm not perfect, just some guy implementing things that so far is working.

This is not a question but rather a thanks to this community. I'm also interested, when I post, on opinions on certain topics I'm unsure of and experiences of others.

[–]__Archaeus__0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm interested in this, and will be watching for it. I will chime in on what's working for me as well.

[–]manlykeAbz0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

any advice on developing game for a 17 year old?

[–]mexaboy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If I could go back in time and say a sentence to 17 year old me, that would be, "don't be afraid to touch girls". So I guess that's my game advice to you.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

No, you don't develop game when you're 17 year old. You occasionally have one night stands or maybe you have some shitty boring girlfriend. Invest in different areas like getting education or holding a job or whatever. You're 17, it's time to grow and become the adult. Then you would learn game.

[–]Ginormousglutes1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Assuming you live in Europe you should hit the club every weekend for night game. Build your social circle there, there's a lot of cool people. You'll also get abundance mentality from the makeouts and pulls you have. Alternatively, just talk to anyone in class. Not just girls(the ugly ones too) also boys to get your social circle up, they might know really cool girls you can game.

[–]manlykeAbz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the great advice.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (23 children) | Copy

I have another one. I've had a couple opportunities to game some young women in the check out line at my local grocer. Every fucking time some post wall cunt is in line behind me and I've backed down because I was concerned about what their reaction would be. Im 40 but could easily pass for 35. Both opportunities have been with girls half half my age or more. I draw the line at 18, just saying. Should I be concerned with gaming young women in plain sight of post wall women? Or even other men for that matter?

[–]1Entropy-70 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

What is some "post wall cunt" in the check out line going to do? Unless you are in a biker bar and hitting on some Hell's Angel's little sister, what guy - a stranger - is going to get in your face about hitting on young women?

I'm 49 and I tend to pass for 10 to 15 years younger. I only date women 35 and under and have had a couple of dates with an 18 year old a couple of years ago (it didn't go anywhere).

My current GF is 27 and Chinese. We met for lunch and she shows up at the pizza parlor with her hair in pig tails wearing a mini-kilt, knee-high socks, runners and a hoodie. She looked like she was 16. I felt really uncomfortable for about 5 minutes until I gave my head a shake and thought "WTF?" Then I didn't care what anyone else thought.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Thanks for the feedback. I was really hoping someone around my age would chime in. Not to say the younger guys here aren't capable of giving solid advice - they obviously are. It's just nice to hear it come from someone who's been there.

And just like others have mentioned here, why should I give a fuck what others think? The answer is I simply shouldn't. So next time I'm pulling the fucking trigger! Post wall bitches and betas be damned. I only get this one life, I can either live it on my terms or try and live it as someone else. I'm choosing me.

Thanks again. Oh, can you send me a pic of your Chinese gf in her mini skirt and pigtails? It's for a research project I'm doing ;)

[–]1Entropy-70 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I can't seem to sign up for imgur. Maybe it has something to do with living in China.

A few weeks ago I got together with my GF and she had bought a sexy sailor/school girl outfit and wanted to do a photo session.

She put her hair in ponytails and then put a mask on. I'm not sure what was up with that but I assume that she assumed I would share the pics with someone at some point, but I have nowhere to post them and can't upload them directly to reddit.

In the meantime: :-)

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, absolute winner! Well played sir, well played.

[–]mexaboy2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Understand that age is not an issue for a lot of girls.

Personal example: I (35) banged the youngest chicks of my life last year, 21 & 20. (edit: yeah I was a beta with no game into my late 20's/early 30's)

Internet example: Go read Blackdragon's blog, guy knows his shit, most girls don't care.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]WhySoRuff1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Sounds like it boils down to him caring what his "peers" think. Post wall women being his peers.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Totally agree. But why should I care?

[–]WhySoRuff0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

The question is why DO YOU CARE? Figure that out and get over it.

[–]trancedj1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Wow man. You nailed it. I've never noticed it before, but I DO have an issue with post-wall women. Maybe this stems from my last 2 relationships plus my divorce we're all post-wall women. They sucked and I ended each of them. I guess I just expected more from women in their mid 30's or 40's. I would think they'd have some understanding of what it takes to keep a man. Or at least try. But my experience has been the opposite. They're more entitled than anyone. Young women seem to have less entitlement and most often a lot more femininity.

I understand that any relationship is a reflection of a man's leadership. But post-wall women seem to be the hardest to tame. What am I missing?

[–]BrunoOh1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I would think they'd have some understanding of what it takes to keep a man.

There's a reason they're single at 30 or 40 or whatever.

[–]trancedj1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent point. I never stopped to think about that.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh, and I meant I don't go under 18. Not above. I have 2 plates aged 47 and 50.

[–]FillingInTheSkanks1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You need to game all of of them to get to her. Charm the old hags while making fuck eyes at the girl of your dreams

[–]trancedj1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Oh shit! I didn't even think of that approach. You sir, I like you.

[–]futuretrackstar 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I'm much younger than you, but I can give you advice that I've heard from men your age who give talks at dating seminars: Your ego is in the way. Alan Roger Currie talks about a man's ego in his material, and basically says that egotism is the concern for how others perceive you. If you let your concern for others' perception of you affect your behavior, you are egotistical.

As men, we should not be egotistical. Alan Roger Currie tells stories about how he will be in a very public setting, like an airport or a party, and he will use provocative language with women and the women will yell at him and curse at him in front of everybody, and make a scene.

[–]trancedj2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Exactly what I don't want. Some post wall bitch creating a scene. What's the point of doing it intentionally as you described?

And fuck you! I don't have a ego problem! ;)

In all seriousness, my concern about what others think of me is definitely part of the problem. Are you saying I should say fuck it and make a scene?

[–]futuretrackstar 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

First, the women who make the scene in Alan Roger Currie's stories are the women that he wants to have sex with, not on-lookers. In your case, the post-wall bitch would be an on-looker. I don't think she would make a scene about you being sexually forward with the young hottie in front of you in the line.

No, I'm not suggesting that YOU make a scene. I'm suggesting that you stop giving a fuck about other people and their feelings.

And, frankly, I think the best advice to EVERYBODY on this sub is to GET THE FUCK OFF THE INTERNET AND GO OUTSIDE! Like me, right now...

[–]trancedj2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Dude. I am outside. In the sun. Having a cold beer.

But your point stands. Stop giving a fuck. Solid advice. Thanks. Enjoy your day!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

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[–]dimarond1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

"What if she gets pregnant, because of me? " Does any of you get this thought a few days after sex. Or am I just being paranoid?

And theoretically let's say that I get a girl pregnant and she wants to keep my baby. What can I do not to get fucked over besides getting a vasectomy yesterday?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Use condom. Or if you already fucked
  2. Change city.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Theoretically, you should've put on a condom.

[–]dimarond2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Always, even so APOE, there is no ifs ands or buts

[–]trancedj17 points18 points  (26 children) | Copy

Should I tell my 25 year old plate that I'm banging to forget about me and marry her fiancé? That I'll never commit to her and that if she wants a family she should marry her bb? It's not a morality question, just kinda feel like I should warn her that if she's looking to branch swing this branch won't hold her.

[–]FortunateBum0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I think it's prudent with almost all women to have an exit strategy. Without one, shit can get messy. So yeah, encourage her to marry the guy. Then she's someone else's problem.

[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You should make it clear that you're not looking for a LTR. Not because I'm a moralfag, but because you get really crazy chick behavior if you set yourself up in their mind to be their captainSAH and you cut them off. That's when they'll try to get you fired, fuck with your car, etc, and feel completely justified.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent point. Thank you.

[–]TheReformist9411 points12 points  (2 children) | Copy

She's cheating on her fiancée with you,and biologically potentially trying to cuck her fiancé, which is the female version of rape,making a man raise another child's for up to 18 years unknowingly.its called rape of commitment.

So fuck her til her eggs dry up then dump her when its too late for her to scramble.hopefully her BB will wise up and dump her so she's left with nothing. #wastehertime

[–]Bigjohnthug0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

... except entitlement to 1/3 of his earnings for 18 years.

[–]bornredd0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


Very RP song on this topic.

[–]mexaboy3 points4 points  (11 children) | Copy

I'm of the opinion that you as a guy who understands red pill should not destroy women. With no other information, it sounds like she's got some hope that you will somehow save her from marrying this betaboy, or that if she does you'll keep her sex life somewhat interesting. So do her and betaboy a favor, and end all contact with her.

[–]TheReformist940 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Why can't you destroy them? They enjoy destroying men through divorce men when they can just cut ties cleanly.

[–]mexaboy0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I'm not saying we can't, I'm saying we shouldn't. And I don't believe most of them enjoy it, they are just succumbing to their solipsism and hamstering, together with a narrative that tells them they have been wronged by us and should milk us for every penny. I have actually separated on amicable terms from a 12-year relationship, several years live-in girlfriend, and she PAID me money because we bought our cars together and hers was more expensive than mine.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

They do enjoy it. Women are sociopathic.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Why shouldnt you destroy women?

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I get what /u/mexaboy is saying. I reckon he has a similar philosophy toward women as I do to bikes.

I do all my own mechanical work including repairs and upgrades to my motorcycle. I know in detail how they work, and I derive joy from turning any bike into a better, faster, more reliable version of that bike, a gem among the general populace of vehicles. When I sell one of my bikes, I usually get much more than I paid for it, though I rarely get all my money from mods/servicing back. And of course when I ride, because I'm performing all my mechanical duties right I can do what I like and ride the shit out of it if I want.

That's a possible analogy for women. If I know how to make them happy (though this is not my primary goal, it is a consequence of being the firm masculine figure in her life), and I improve them as people, I can look back on a relationship/plate phase and say I improved their value.

It doesn't make you a bad person to ride the shit out of a bike, never maintain it and sell it for less than you bought it for. But man, I have an inborn need to be good at things, to try hard, and to improve any bike that comes into my hands. I can see how the same applies to women. However, this is entirely ethical and has to do with your philosophy of yourself and your place in the world. It's up to you if you want to just consume, or improve the things that come into and leave your life.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Thanks man. It's like the old saying "with great knowledge/power comes great responsibility." And I think you're spot on, she's given me the "I love you" look after sex. But just because I want to get my dick wet doesn't mean I want to go around hurting women in the process. It's not a morality thing per say. I have no problem banging married women, women with bf's, whatever. I believe as long as I'm clear with what I want (as someone else here mentioned) that will allow her to make her own decisions. And as you mentioned, I could simply end it.

Thanks for the feedback. If you'd like an update on what I decide to do let me know.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

Bro. Lose that morality. Women love it when you hurt tthem. Women are gluttons for punishment. They're sadomasochists who love to hurt beta men & be hurt by alpha men. The more pain you cause her, the more tingles she has, the more she loves you.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I'll admit this is the hardest part of TRP for me. I just find it hard to do. Too many years of BB conditioning I suppose. I am trying though.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah it's fucked up because it doesn't make sense. Women dot make sense. They're irrational.

They're emotional voids.

"If you look at her and see anything besides emptiness, fear and emotional hunger, you are looking at the parts of yourself which have been consumed to that point."

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Woah. That last line just blew my fucking mind. Beautiful.

Thank you very much.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS13 points14 points  (3 children) | Copy

He's the fiancé, it's not your prerogative to tell your plate to leave her Alpha Fucks (you) for Mr. Betabucks, or vice versa. I think this woman knows. If she attempts it and loses both, it's her mistake and consequences to bear.

[–]trancedj1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Thank you for helping provide some clarity. I believe you're right in all regards.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

  1. Alpha gives "tingles" not comfort. The fact he is the BB and you're the "AF" says it all.

  2. Let your actions do the talking.

  3. Enjoy while it lasts. She'll drop when the times right.

[–]trancedj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you. I plan to enjoy it while it lasts. Or as TRP would say, "she was already gone the moment I met her."

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well, it seems like you've been pulled in some crazy 'L'Amour des trois' psychological game. There is you, her and her bb who she is probably planning to marry. I recommend to get the fuck out of there.

[–]captainoftheosiris21 points22 points  (1 child) | Copy

Don't talk to her about her fiancé, but definitely be up front with her about what you want and don't want.

Don't think about it as "warning her" either. Obviously you don't want to commit to her, so make sure she doesn't.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (12 children) | Copy

I would like to ask about something I like to call "The Lebowski Effect." I struggle with cold approach due to a lack of social finesse from being in the USMC. I'm often told I'm too direct and intimidating in some ways.

Specifically, when I'm clean cut, shaved, dressed well and groomed I seem to regularly strike out. When I'm scruffy, unshowered, rocking a dirty t-shirt and shorts and sandals I seem to have a huge improvement in my success rate for cold approach.

What are some reasons this could be the case?

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Clean cut isn't the predominant sexy image for women these days. Outside of a professional office, they prefer stubble and a slightly disheveled look. Combine that with some sharp, casual clothes and I think you get the best of both worlds.

Why that is so probably has to do with women wanting a "rugged" and masculine man, and facial hair is an indicator of that but they still like a sense of refinement or savvy, and wealth indicators so going pure jock or lumbersexual might be limiting yourself.

Just some examples:

Charlie Cox aka Daredevil.

Tom Ellis aka Lucifer.

Or look at People Magazine "Sexiest Man Alive" issues for the past 15 years. Virtually all of the cover shots have the guy with 5 o'clock shadow or stubble and wearing a T-shirt and then the pics inside have them in a tux or something, but still not clean shaven.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

There is some reason why you cut, shave, dress and groom yourself. Yes, you want to improve your cold approach success rate that's why you cut, shave, dress, etc. You are too invested in 'winning the game' solution. That's create pressure. You become nervous.

When you're not unshowered you are not so interested in winning the game you have an excuse like 'She reject me but it was because I was unshowered' so less pressure here.

What I suggest? Cut, shave, dress, groom then made up some bullshit excuse. That's the solution.

[–]captainoftheosiris1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Great terminology. The Dude Abides.

When you look like you don't give a fuck, girls may think you genuinely don't. And you shouldn't. But that sort of casual attitude you're trying to exude when attracting women probably finds more success when you look more the part (dressing like The Dude) as opposed to being neatly dressed and well kept.

Many here argue that dressing too nicely will have a negative impact on your game, because you resemble that of a good boy beta provider.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Interesting... Well, summer is about to be in full swing, so I can certainly capitalize on this more and see where it goes.

I met another RP'er in the wild not long ago (first time ever, it was exciting as fuck) and we had a conversation somewhat related to this. He was a wealthy hispanic man who usually parties in Miami and dressed the part. Down there dressing to impress and standout pays dividends but further north he stood out in a not-so-great manner. Even though his dress conveyed wealth and status (the dude's watch is worth more than my truck) I watched him get shot down by every chick he approached.

Conversely, I managed to leave with 3 numbers that night besides being underdressed even for that place. I'm sure had I dressed like that in Miami I A) would not have been let into the bar and B) would have been ignored by every girl there.

It's just something that has caught my attention lately as something I should be more aware of and leverage in context to help improve my success rate. Understanding why and how it applies and where to employ it are major aspects of that.

[–]captainoftheosiris0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Finding another Red Pill male in person is great. It's a chance encounter that should not be wasted. However, every point you bring up resonates with a core principle often lost to TRP:

Everything is situational.

When you find what works for you, utilize it to the best of your advantage. But understand, what may work for you could (or will) not work for another.

This is why we discuss. We study tactics in order to better understand how to succeed.

Ask yourself, would Wealthy Hispanic Red Pill male do better with women if embracing The Lebowski Effect? Why/why not?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Absolutely not. He owned his persona. He was about 10 years older than me and has done very well with his business that started a little younger than me. He exuded calm machismo.

His main gripe that night was supplicating behavior of all the other men in the bar. He said it had created a dead zone and that it was basically a waste to stay there that night (it was). "Do you see any men touching a girl? Kissing a girl? Dancing on a girl? No. Every man in this bar is performing song and dance to get a woman's attention and it is failing all of them. Watch this."

He walked up to two girls and addressed one of them. I couldn't hear what he said over the music but his body language was on point. The girl shrieked at him that she had a boy friend and her friend wasn't feeling well and "to get away from them right now." I was stunned, nothing he did or possibly could have said deserved that reaction. But there it was. He shrugged came back to me and said that that basically described his whole night to that point.

He was tall, well built, immaculately groomed, and dressed very well. He was well-spoken and very relaxed and calm. But he crashed and burned where I would have imagined him to knock it out of the park. Had he been dressed like me, with his machismo, at his age it would have felt...off. It just wasn't his element I gues.

I didn't really approach either, whereas he waded in after specific girls. Two of the numbers I got from chatting girls up who were next to me while I waited on my drink and one was a girl my buddy brought that I hit it off with. Aside from that I had to agree with him that the energy was off. I got his number as well. The plan is to hit Miami once I'm out of school. I'm pretty excited about it. I've never had an older male in my life who was able to teach me this kind of stuff in person (in the context of women anyway).

It definitely is situational. I don't go to "clubs" for this reason. I can't work that environment, no matter how I'm dressed I have never pulled a girl from a club.

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I mean, an enormous aspect of alpha male behaviors ingrained in you in the Corps are designed to purposefully make everyone else feel small. That's why we're the cockiest motherfuckers on the planet. It definitely can be off-putting in more arenas than just approaching though. It has its utility, but maybe I should examine a more precise application rather than just a broadstroke default demeanor.

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Reading that makes me think of Frank Underwood. He has many qualities to admire but he is a slave to envy and vengeance.

This is the kind of social finesse I lack for sure though. It had never entered my mind that several of my closest friends have in fact taken to running me down, especially in mixed company, in the wake of my recent successes. I wonder if it is unconscious or intentional. In any case it is there.

I'm not really one to leverage my service to hit on women. It comes off as cheap because it is and worthwhile women catch onto that. If I can initiate genuine interest in a woman, her respect and admiration grow upon learning that about me. If I lead with it it becomes my identity in her eyes and I become just another G.I.

[–]futuretrackstar 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

Incongruence. Your manner of approach is probably more congruent with the lack of concern for one's appearance that is associated with the scruffy look.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

So...my dress unconsciously affects my mannerism, or my mannerisms, regardless of dress, are consistent but mismatched with a more groomed appearance? I could homestly see it being true either way.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I usually have no problems with approaching women, but my gym game is weak. It's difficult because they're always doing cardio or machines while I'm at the power racks or doing free weights. It comes off as unnatural and forced when I just walk up to a girl on the other side of the gym and try to start chatting.

What kinds of approaches do you recommend in a gym setting? Looking for replies from people with tried and true methods, not speculation.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't do gym game. Go to the gym for fitness-like activities. Gaming chicks in gyms is FUCKING CREEPY. Just don't. You seem like a retard. Wait till gym is over. Then practice game.

[–]DannyDemotta16 points17 points  (6 children) | Copy

In the gym, how do you tell if a woman is legit interested in you if she has in, and keeps on, her headphones, and isn't talking to anyone else? Like, you're minding your own business, lifting heavy shit, have on some sick threads, smile on your face having a good time, etc, and good-looking girls gravitate around you. You're doing cable push-downs - suddenly, she needs to do cable leg extensions. You're Benching - now some other girl is doing her ass/leg dumbbell routine 4 feet in front of you. Is she just fucking with you, irritated you won't acknowledge her presence like all the other lemmings - but as soon as you do, she'll just turn and leave?

Asking for a friend.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Just have him walk over and ejaculate on her spandex plastered ass. Then ask her for coffee.

[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

It doesn't matter. It's a common misconception that you need to wait for IOIs or signals of her being attracted to make a move, or escalate. That is what I call permission-boy game. A guy only wants to approach when he sees that she's eyeing him. That is requiring her to make the first step, and it's fine if it happens that way, but relying on it is bad practice.

Go in if you are interested. Who cares if she's teasing you or just fishing for validation or genuinely interested, or it's all in your head.

The ONLY way you can know for sure is if you go in.

Don't be an IOI junkie; that is basically just being fear-based. You're afraid of the rejection so you want to wait until you see her giving you a sign that says "I won't reject you if you approach".

That's fine for guys learning game, but at some point, you have to evolve past that. Make eye contact, walk in, say something, and if she's not interested, she'll make that clear. You can't be dependent on receiving the right social cue to go ahead.

[–]DannyDemotta0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, that helps a lot. F-for my friend, I mean. I'm sure it will help him a a lot. Once I tell him.

Jokes aside - yes, that's me to a tee - the part about being an IOI junkie still trying to 'learn the game'. I went from being an undesirable jobless nerd, to a long relationship, and now I'm single with a high-paying job and much better looking. But I didn't magically gain +1200 self-esteem in the process, and even if I did, social self-esteem is very different from approaching-random-women self-esteem.

I'm working on a few routines now - corny, I know. We'll see how they go. Just little things, like lifting something heavy and then saying "You enjoying the show?" or other smart-ass lines. Or just pretending to pull a muscle and having a cartoonish over-the-top reaction to try to make them laugh.

Its an everyday struggle reconciling who I used to be with who I am now, and where I want to be. I act 70/20/10 when it needs to be more like 20/50/30. Working on it!

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

You need to learn body-language signs of attraction. Also she is trying to show you her ass, or become nervous in your presence and starts to suck when she lifts. And this happens many many times. That's how you can tell with high probability that woman has legit interest in you.

[–]1ToSeeAndToHear8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well you escalate like you do with any other girl. If she's interested, she'll respond positively. If she's not, she won't.

If you don't escalate, she'll stay firmly in the "not responding positively" camp the vast majority of the time.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

She's probably just a tease. Maybe she looked so good in her spandex that your friend is infatuated with her.

[–]QPRCHOC5 points6 points  (7 children) | Copy

Is insecurity and lack of confidence something to be valued in a girl? This girl I've been seeing had a messed up childhood where neither of her parents took very good care of her and she clearly has issues with trust and confidence (she wanted to make sure I didn't have a girlfriend on our first date).

Bearing this in mind, she's also the kind of girl I imagine I can wrap around my finger quite easily. Is this a desired TRP situation or am I misreading red flags?

[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If she's not mentally and emotionally healthy, then she's ONS / plate material, period. All girls are a little crazy, and all girls who grow up in our fucked up society are going to have a pretty fucked up self-esteem complex where they are simultaneously full of themselves yet very critical and very fragile. That is fine. But anything beyond that, anything that says she's damaged goods or just has too much baggage, etc, makes her plate material.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

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[–]QPRCHOC0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

No that is not the case. I enjoy her as she is. I raised this subject because I've had a few years out with some personal issues such as anxiety and have only recently started dating and employing TRP principles. I ask whether it's valued because to me this feels very desirable as I'm relatively inexperienced. I feel as though this will be harder for me to fuck up than if I was dating somebody else.

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Insecurity and lack of confidence can be valued in a girl because basically this is girls traits.

If you can imagine that you can easily wrap somebody around your finger it doesn't mean that you actually can easily wrap them around your finger.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Depends what you value. She will be more mercurial than your average girl, I expect. But if you can weather her storms, I would also expect her to be more dependent on you. This can be seen as a positive or a negative depending on what you want.

It's likely she has "daddy issues" and will see you as both a partner and a guardian. I prefer this archetype but it's certainly not for everyone. A certain level of stoicism is a pre-requisite for dating these types.

[–]BlackJ13 points4 points  (17 children) | Copy

What's the explanation to the commonly held belief that: "Women love assholes."?

Is it just masculine behavior being misinterpreted as "asshole behavior" due to the constant scorn of it in today's society?

[–]WhySoRuff2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Abundance mentality 》 take it or leave it attitude 》asshole behavior.

Women tie in asshole behavior with strength of character (IDGAF) which stems from a take it or leave it attitude (outcome independence) which is a byproduct of having lots of options (abundance).

They love assholes because they perceive them to have lots of other options.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

The "asshole" is a misnomer.

She can't say "Hello beta, I am really hot for alpha men, your job is to provide for me".

So she says "That last guy who fucked me raw bent over the table was a real asshole, you won't treat me like that will you? you'll marry me right? you don't just want sex? you'll provide for my children right?"

It's just female-speak for alpha / attractive.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Many women have masochistic traits - wants to be humiliated, fucked hardly like a slut, bad mouthed and etc. That's why they are attracted to assholes. Actually probably every woman wants this. That's also a secret. Don't tell anybody.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've been saying this forever. There's a myth of the "nice alpha" going around on trp. Women love alpha assholes. Women are sadomasochistic gluttons for punishment. They love hurting betas & being hurt by alphas. Nothing turns a woman on more than when you emotionally hurt her & disregard her. For women, pain = strong tingles. They rather feel negative than nothing at all. Also, women know that they're wortbless. That's why their self esteem is so low. So when a man treats them like they're not worthless, they think he's a soft beta pedestalizing idiot because he must be an idiot to actually treat them nice. Women don't respect nice.

[–]Curlosaur7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

deleted What is this?

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

Women love assholes. Women love dark triad men who don't give a fuck about them and are selfish and arrogant, and sadistic. Women love men like that because they are the same way. Women are sadomasochists, they love hurting betas and being hurt by alphas. Women are gluttons for pain. Assholes don't care about them, so they give them pain. Which is tingles. Its like those crime lords who beat their women and then make love to them. The pain and passion equals tingles. Women also love a challenge and assholes are a challenge. Do not believe that garbage about a nice alpha. Being nice is the best way to make a girls pussy dry.

Women do not like compassion or empathy in men.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

People who say that don't get it. It's not about being an asshole. It's about being a man with value. It's about being a somebody. If a man's creepy as hell, got no money to his name, don't know how to dress and don't know how to talk to people, he's a nobody. Being an asshole would make his life even worse.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

No its not. Women love assholes. Women love dark triad men who don't give a fuck about them and are selfish and arrogant, and sadistic. Women love men like that because they are the same way. Women are sadomasochists, they love hurting betas and being hurt by alphas. Women are gluttons for pain. Assholes don't care about them, so they give them pain. Which is tingles. Its like those crime lords who beat their women and then make love to them. The pain and passion equals tingles. Women also love a challenge and assholes are a challenge. Do not believe that garbage about a nice alpha. Being nice is the best way to make a girls pussy dry.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy

IMO this is an overused manosphere trope. Women don't love assholes. When guys act like assholes to "neg" women, it doesn't work and shows massive insecurity except on the dumbest of broads.

When people say "women love assholes", they really mean women love masculine men who don't back down, pander to women, or apologize. Think John Wayne. He's actually a noble guy at the end of the day, but he also doesn't take shit from anyone.

Because our society is so backwards, being an actual man is now mixed up with being an asshole.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Nah. Negging works on smart chicks too.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Girls can tell when you're working off some PUA playbook, trying to "neg" like an autistic faggot. If you haven't adopted masculine virtues it will show no matter what your strategy is. Just learn to be a man then be yourself...simpler, easier, more effective.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree with you on that. Don't be an awkward spergy beta. I'm very teasing with girls and playfully neg them and they love it tho. Besides the basics of pua that ive read up on, I've never seen the reason dudes use retarded shit like pick up lines or canned responses. Just let the convo flow. Like honestly, I havent read much about PUA. I just use natural game I guess.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (14 children) | Copy

What's the truth on monogamy? I haven't been monogamous for a good 9 months, am spinning 2-3 plates, and only vaguely see the appeal of getting in a relationship again (keeping someone sexually exclusive, satisfying my possessive insecurities).

Is monogamy fundamentally un-RP? I'm 30.

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

YMMV. Whatever works for you. RP is just a tool box to get what you want given current social circumstances.

If you need to be sold on the idea of monogamy, then that is a different issue.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

Monogamy is when you fuck 1 chick on day-to-day basics, polygamy is when you fuck different chicks. It's not related to RP. Sorry.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Polygamy is having multiple wives. You could have 100 wives and be a virgin for life. It's not related to sex. Sorry.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (9 children) | Copy

Monogamy is a pre-req for starting a family. Carrying on your seed is RP AF. Ending 10,000 years of ancestry is beta shit.

You don't need to settle down tomorrow, but your focus should be finding a keeper. Muh dik shouldn't be the driving force in your life.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

As an existentialist I respectfully disagree. Nature gets along just fine with few instances of monogamy. Monogamy and the nuclear family are constructs of religion and economy. You can sire plenty of children and continue your line without ever settling down. Its just a pain in the dick now due to family courts.

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Continuing your line" isn't really possible using an r-selection strategy if "your line" is intellectual and memetic as well as genetic.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree 100%. My reply was written in a Western context. If our country wasn't occupied by anti-Westerners and our court system wasn't totally cucked, my advice would be different.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

My sisters already have plenty of healthy kids, I'm not sure how urgent it is that I procreate.

It also seems highly likely that I will enjoy more sex outside of monogamy than within it. (TRP is sexual strategy)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

My sisters already have plenty of healthy kids, I'm not sure how urgent it is that I procreate.

If you want to actually raise your kids, you should probably start a family in the next 10-15 years. Wait much later and you're pushing it.

I wouldn't say it's urgent, but something to aim for, especially if you're smart. When smart people fail to reproduce, not only are they an evolutionary failure, but they actively contribute to dysgenics. Plus who wants to kill their ancestral line? Prior to degenerate modern society, this would (rightfully be) looked down upon.

It also seems highly likely that I will enjoy more sex outside of monogamy than within it.

There's more to life than enjoying sex. In your golden years you should be focused on building your empire, leaving your legacy, not who you're gonna fuck next. That's not to say you can't enjoy monogomous sex, but life has seasons and you need to know when to shift priorities.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

evolutionary failure, but they actively contribute to dysgenics

These aren't values I personally adopt. My purpose in life isn't to satisfy evolutionary protocols.

Plus who wants to kill their ancestral line

Aesthetically, sure. I see where you're coming from. But realistically, the neat thought of "continuing the ancestral line" isn't a compelling enough one to sacrifice freedom and hundreds of thousands of dollars to care for people you create.

building your empire, leaving your legacy

What empire? Alexander the Greats? Gone. Napoleons? Gone.

Life is about enjoying it. Legacies are overrated methinks.

"Summer grasses

All that remain

Of soldiers' dreams"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

You enjoy Western civilization, right? If Western people cease to exist, so will Western civiliazation. You are part of a people regardless of how much society has atomized you. Western countries are facing a demographic crisis. You can be part of the problem or part of the solution.

If you're outlook on life is fuck it, I'm in it to enjoy myself, then I feel bad for you and your people.

What empire? Alexander the Greats? Gone. Napoleons? Gone

Except you're still talking about them in 2016. There spirit, their legacies, their impact to the world lives on.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Good points. I like western civilization. I advocate deportation measures and child-bearing requirements that promote a healthy genetic composition in the population.

My siblings are beginning to have large families (much larger than the replacement level). If I was an only child I think I would think more seriously about passing my genes down. Thing is, they WANT to raise families. I don't.

I think activism in the political process with respect to demographics engineering in the west is more directly profitable to western civilization than it is to have kids. Or at least the political process seems to provide more bang for my buck.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think activism in the political process with respect to demographics engineering in the west is more directly profitable to western civilization than it is to have kids.

Agreed. All westerners must be doing one or the other or both if Western society is to live on. Apathy/inactivity are no longer options. The age of decadence is behind us.

[–]5639673252 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Read how to manage your bitches (sidebar). It explains the investment recommended on the woman's part to be worthy of an LTR.

[–]FarOrAMess1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

I got one - how should I go about being dominant in environments where masculinity isn't really admired?

For example, I'm currently studying music production in college, and while one of the students is a classic alpha (muscular, great with women, extroverted), yet he's not really socially successful in our environment because, well, he's the Israeli stereotypical equivalent of a dumb jock. While one of the more mysterious, yet super shy and introverted guys is probably the most socially "acclaimed" dude .

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

If masculinity is not admired in this particular environment then you might try to blend in with this environment. That's how you become environmental alpha.

[–]DannyDemotta1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

In this case, perception is not reality. What matters is what happens behind closed doors, or outside of the academic environment - not what happens while everyone is at work/in class.

[–]5639673252 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Which one gets laid more? There's your answer.

[–]cockstantino1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

How can I tell if she's a "good girl" or a slut without having to fuck her and accidentally alpha windowing what would have been wife material?

Recently i had a day where i was on fire. I've been getting intense IOIs from almost every girl I know on campus, in the bus, etc. but this one day several girls who I thought were innocent started talking really dirty to me (subcommunication) and making moaning sounds around me pretending they were tired.

I'm confused. It's well known around our engineering group that this one girl is impossible to get with and is a virgin with religious parents. And I get these signs from her. Not sure what do pls halp

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

If she is virgin she might be technical slut tops. You should do background check on her and also watch her behaviour. If there is no slut traits then she is not slut. That's really easy.

[–]cockstantino1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What do you mean background check? I actually tried subtly checking for red flags and she's already admitted travelling with friends and sleeping over at a (girl)friend's house near campus after a formal event. That's all I could get out of her. She also can't cook.

Green flags are high though: she doesn't dress slutty (she started wearing tighter clothes after our encounter though). She's close with her family. Her dad is a manly religious man. She's never had a boyfriend. She has a rep for being a virgin. She didn't drink until recently. She cleans the house a lot. I know her family (family friends) and they're good people (and a bit too fluent in powertalk).

Unsure if she could just be innocent and untrained on how to cook yet.

[–]5639673252 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

What does it matter if she's a "good girl" or "slut?" Maintain frame and escalate.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (27 children) | Copy

Why is being able to drink lots and lots of alcohol at parties something admired by both girls and men? I don't drink alcohol and it always baffles me when they treat that as some kind of feat of strength and value..

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Drinking is a social bonding experience. If you are not drinking, you are not bonding, and you are not being social. This happens at teenage and college parties in America as well as (where I am) amongst middle-aged Chinese guys.

People who are drinking are shedding their inhibitions and "having fun": if you aren't drinking, you aren't "fun".

Alcohol tolerance is respected to the extent that losing control of your mental or bodily functions isn't cool.

After 10 years with the military engineers I could drink most people under the table. However, several years ago I decided to never drink when women are around. Then I cut way down on drinking socially with men, and I quit completely about a month ago (I have been on and off the wagon several times for 6 months to a year at a stint). I am back into lifting and once my BF% gets down where I want it then I will go back to drinking socially - but no more than one or two with women around.

If drinking alcohol seems like a social imperative then fake it. Bring near-beer (0.5%) in unmarked bottles; mix a 2L diet cola with lime juice and artificial rum flavor; pay off the bartender to water your drinks down.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm not a drinker either. It's interesting to be the only sober person in a environment where everyone's trying to out-drink each other. However, it's not my thing, so I avoid these types of events and social circles based around drinking.

Some subcultures have an anti-alcohol ethos; for example skydivers/paragliders, pilots, rock climbers, martial artists. There are plenty of places where alcohol isn't a de-facto requirement where you can grow social roots.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Some subcultures have an anti-alcohol ethos; for example skydivers/paragliders, pilots, rock climbers, martial artists.

I've practiced martial arts all my life. Heh.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's psychological game. Read the book 'Games people play'. Also I liked to become drunk because it's awesome not because it's admired by someone.

[–]truthyego0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Try Kratom. Way better imo. Get a Kratom buzz going before heading out, and u only need/want a couple drinks

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Protip: it isn't. I have struggled with alcoholism. Nobody likes "that guy." "That guy" doesn't get imvited to things, he tags along with people who were invited. Being able to responsibly partake can improve the mood of the situation, but the Jersey Shore "SHOTS!" lifestyle stops being fun after 22.

There is nothing more embarrassing to other adults than a man who can't hold his liquor, particularly a stranger. Women get a bit of a pass. This isn't to say a man should be able to tolerate loads of alcohol- he should be intimately aware of his limit and maintain it throughout the night. Let the women drink til they puke. Real men value their dignity too much to get sloppy drunk. Real men can be fun and interesting with or without the booze.

I wish I'd learned this shit a lot earlier in my life. I would have saved tens of thousands of dollars and hundreds of hangovers. All that time and money I could have invested reading, lifting, learning a skill, starting a business.

Have fun and enjoy your youth, but don't fall into the "FOMO" trap that somehow you missed out by not murdering your liver and kidneys and screaming about nothing with "Woo-girls."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Good point M1s4n7hr0p3. Similar I learnt from my Dad last year:

  1. Drink better alcohol, you will drink less.

  2. Get pissed drunk once and learn your limit (according to him most people's limit where they can behave their selves is 2-4 drinks)

  3. Pace yourself when drinking once you know your limit.

  4. Every now and then take a break to drink water or eat food.

I'm 24, going on 25 and for years I felt pressure to drink like everyone else in social settings.

since applying this and discovering TRP I rarely go over 1-4 drinks

Also switch drinks. I recently tried stout and although I like JWBL and Chivas 12 y.o. I have a soft spot for Jameson.

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Good points overall:

  1. You only drink less because you are spending more money. Drink less cheap stuff (Edit: that is, drink the cheap stuff rather than the premium stuff, but drink less of it) and you get the same effect while having more money in your pocket.
  2. Getting piss drunk repeatedly increases (I won't say "improves") your alcohol tolerance. There are a few stages that include a) behavior, b) slurred speech, c)straight walking, and then d) vomiting and e)passing out. You won't know limits a and b unless you drink with a sober friend who can debrief you later. Similarly, you won't remember e). Otherwise, 2-4 drinks for mostly non-drinkers, about 6 drinks for a fit male who drinks regularly, and then it goes up from there.
  3. Rule of thumb is one drink per hours, any more than that counts against your limit as per 2, above.
  4. Before drinking, line your stomach with fat. As little as a pad of butter will slow down your alcohol absorption rate considerably. A hand full of nuts or an order of fries works too. This information came to me from an MD who treated a kid for alcohol poisoning: the kid died after chugging a 26er of 80 proof on an empty stomach. Apparently, a pad of butter would have been enough to make the difference between life and death. If you are approaching your limit, then alternate between water and alcoholic drinks.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the heads up Entrophy-7

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I've been drinking JD for a decade now. I stick with it almost exclusively. It's far from top shelf but I don't get hangovers and it doesn't break that bank.

[–]1Entropy-70 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Triple-distilled vodka is, by alcohol content, the least likely to give you a hangover.

[–]DannyDemotta0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

People want to see a show, they want entertainment. You aren't required to be a part of that and women don't genuinely want you to be a part of that. No (attractive) woman wants to go to bed with a guy with whiskey dick, or is too trashed to fuck properly. Ugly women, sure, because that might be their only chance with you - when you're absolutely wasted.

The key to successful partying is nursing the same one or two drinks for as long as possible, and always mingling with new groups of people so nobody notices that you're doing it. "How many drinks have you had" "I lost count, ha ha!" (No you didn't, you're on your 2nd drink 4 hours into the party).

[–]1Entropy-71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have never had a problem with "whiskey dick". But if the chick is not her self drinking, then they don't want you smelling of booze anyways.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

Single glass, dark liquor, on the rocks. It comes out to 2-3 drinks worth and people can't believe you drink straight JD, even though I've actually consumed far less than they have. It was pretty interesting that the key to controlling my drinking was more liquor, not less. And who the fuck cares if they notice? I don't have to qualify my decision to drink how I do with anyone.

[–]DannyDemotta0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

It's equal parts so 'they' (the crowd who urges everyone to drink to exess, above and beyond enjoying yourself) don't notice - but also to keep moving around and not get stale. If the party is 8 hours, and you spend 6 1/2 of them in the company of the same 4-8 people, you're not going to develop many new connections, prospects, etc.

And it's, of course, much harder to escalate/isolate a girl if you're camping in the living room in the same chair for hours on end. If you've already been in 5, 6 rooms of the same house/building; inside, outside; on the roof; in the basement; etc.....you'll know what areas have a good ambiance for your intentions. Maybe you want to tease her first - so you go to the area with the most jokesters. Then you want to put on a masculine power/roughhousing display, so you go to the area with a few jocks/lifters. Then you want some alone time, so you take her to where there's few/no other people.

My point being, if you're moving around a lot, to different areas and around different people, nobody is going to make a note of how much you're drinking. Its only when you camp in the same area that one person, 4 people, 8 people will all talk about how you're barely drinking anything, and try to pour you shots, etc etc. You can be standoffish and defiant all you want when confronting this - I'd rather just avoid it in the first place.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Fair point. If you're spending 8 hours at a party, you're there far too long. If a party starts at 9, I would roll in around 11 and be out by 2, 3 at the latest. Making an appearance is important but 4 hours is about the max I would find myself stayimg in one spot.

Fucking drunk girls at parties comes with a list of problems as well, both legal and social. Is her ASD going to kick in if someone walks in on you balls-deep in her, pushing her face into the sink? Is her boyfriend/orbiter there? Is it a professional gathering? Is she going to call it rape in the morning?

Stay long enough to build some status and value, get a number or two and bounce. If you wanna fuck a girl from the party take her home and make sure people see her leave with you and have been privvy to her deciding to leave with you.

Meanwhile, anyone pushing alcohol on you isn't someone whose opinion you should care much about. It's a very shallow and immature behavior that belongs in junior year of college. You can politely decline without losing face. I don't shoot whiskey because it wrecks my stomach. I don't drink clear liquor or sugar bullshit on principle. Guess that leaves me sipping the drink I already have prepared. Oh, well.

[–]DannyDemotta0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Here, here. I'll drink to that! If you see me drinking heavily, it's a once-in-a-blue-moon privilege - not "Saturday". Even if it's free; even if i don't work tomorrow, or for several days after, have a ride home, etc - I just don't get down like that.

It'd be great to get a Peer Pressure post going on, and strategies to say no without appearing standoffish, prudish or "no fun" - but also, to maximize the effectiveness when you finally do say yes. For example, we'd generally agree that smoking 10-20 cigarettes a day is a bad idea, but if a girl you're interested in smokes you can let her 'talk you into' having some alone time with her, outside, smoking. So, controlling your indulgences, so to speak.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

Western countries have an occupied media. Binge drinking used to be considered low-life behavior. Now that we have a media/elite that wants to subvert Western society, they push binge drinking. Simple as that.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Thanks, I understand now. This coupled with the reject of virtue by women, and you end up with such behaviour being rewarded.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

This coupled with the reject of virtue by women

Women follow men, and men have set a bad example. Occupied media has brainwashed men, and women follow their lead down the dark path. We are the cause of female degeneracy and the only solution.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No, women just have no virtue.

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

The problem is, there is hardly anyone who can show men that there is another path than the one we are currently following. Men forgot don't even know things can be different.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah, in Western countries the propaganda is so thick we're like fish asking "what's water?" Most men don't even realize what's been done to their minds. That's why I highly recommend travelling to Asia or Eastern Europe to experience actual femininity. It's a transcendent experience. It strikes at your very core as a man and you immediately know it is natural and right and everything you were taught before is a big fat lie.

[–]Redasshole2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I live in europe. I never saw anything other than feminine women in my whole life. Then, I went to live in Toronto for 6 months.

[–]Devilsalwayscry0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

The fact someone can have a good time without using it as a crutch is a sign of confidence

[–]Redasshole0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I'm talking about those time where it's the one who can drink the most. Like when someone puts a pipe in your mouth and you drink as much alcohol as you can.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you don't drink at all, you don't belong at this type of party. And, it is a type of party.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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