I'm seeing a lot of posts about men being devastated when the stbx or ex drops the divorce hammer on them. I was one of them too.

I tried to save my marriage for 4-5 months before I finally agreed to the divorce. We lived together for 2 months after that until she moved out. Move out day really made me feel bad. Then a week or two later we went to get the final agreement notarized. We met at Postal Annex at the strip mall. She was cheerful. I was somber. 20 years of marriage. 2 kids, 2 labors, 2 hospitals. 3 cities. 5 apartments, 1 house. Kids going through K-12 plus both in college. And it all ends at a fucking Postal Annex at a strip mall. I have to say I was pretty down when I got back to my house, I wanted to get drunk but all I had in the house was Sprite.

Then I realized, she is not the woman I dated anymore. She is not the woman I decided to have two kids with. She is not the woman I bought the house with. She is now some completely different being, with her own selfish desires and not an ounce of love or concern for me.

Why should I be sad about someone who couldn't care less for me. Understanding this made me feel a lot better.