CMV: women have gotten so used to poor treatment, many don't know how to respond when treated well

rakiim · 2023-11-27T16:58:33+00:00

They know how to respond when it's the right man, they just don't give a shit if you're not a guy they like.

gntlbastard · 2023-11-27T17:13:29+00:00

The bigger issue with what you posted was to have a discussion in a committee about it. It's very telling.

Safinated · 2023-11-27T19:29:52+00:00

The title of the video is “ghetto culture explained”, so obviously this is a minority view

Electronic_West_1831 · 2023-11-27T17:11:58+00:00

The average woman can rack up hundreds of likes in Tinder in a few hours and have an abundance of options for potent dates - if she’s getting “poor treatment” it’s because she’s consistently choosing shitty men and has nobody to blame but herself. But in all probability she’s choosing men who fall into the “bad boy” archetype over men she considers boring/creepy and that’s why she’s gets “poor treatment”.

obviousredflag · 2023-11-27T17:05:34+00:00

Funny you don't see the poor treatment the guy got from this women in your example.

sometimesthisisweird · 2023-11-27T17:07:15+00:00

I don't think not opening doors or bringing flowers is considered poor treatment, at all. I personally love flowers, don't get the whole door opening things, I can open the damn doors.

I usually dismiss most TikTok or these dating podcasts since most seem to be so damn silly.

But, I can definitely follow her thought process, although I personally would not have processed it the way she did. Her reaction could stem from having some damn high standards, that could be unrealistic or just be immature about the whole dating thing.

Most men are nice, great people, even if they don't bring flowers or open doors.

Junior_Ad_3086 · 2023-11-27T18:24:50+00:00

bringing flowers to a first date is not 'good treatment'. it's too much, kind of simp-like behavior.

if you hand out your attention, affection, validation, resources etc. like free candy, women won't value you because you don't value yourself.

women aren't necessarily into the bad boy type (although some definitely are), they just want a guy who's confident, assertive and doesn't put them on a pedestal.

Traditional-Good1724 · 2023-11-27T17:13:06+00:00

Do you think her reaction stems from something else?

yes

What do you think?

can't say because don't wanna get banned

silverhippo15 · 2023-11-27T17:13:42+00:00

The caveat here is that "poor treatment" is really just normal treatment. Why do women think they deserve to be treated better than everybody else?

Wooshie_Pop · 2023-11-27T17:55:45+00:00

So a guy treating a woman well and receiving poor treatment in return is somehow men’s fault? What responsibility if any at all does the woman here have for responding in the way she did?

babazuki · 2023-11-27T18:59:07+00:00

As a sexist, I agree this woman is messed up as an individual and it's not her own fault. She doesn't have the mental capacity to be accountable for her own behavior and attitudes.

It's always mens fault for the way women act. It's never the other way around. Men are way too cunning and shrewd to be dealing with women in general. Women should stay home to be protected by their families. They can't navigate society on their own.

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-11-27T17:04:00+00:00

Why do you think she’s a pure person? You guys don’t feel weird when you assume that women have default “ good” behavior?

Konoha_Shinobee · 2023-11-27T17:40:33+00:00

She is talks about how she was met on a first date by a guy who bought her flowers and opened her door for her etc.

Women don't care. That stuff just makes you look desperate and is more likely to turn them off.

Her first reaction was to get on group chat with her friends and say that the guy is weird.

See.

Women don't care how you treat them, it really just comes down to whether they're attracted to you.

pvtshoebox · 2023-11-27T20:44:47+00:00

Why is spending $12 on flowers considered "weird" by people who would likely expect her date to spend $30-$50 on her dinner?

LillthOfBabylon · 2023-11-27T16:55:31+00:00

women have gotten so used to poor treatment, many don't know how to respond when treated well

A wild nice guy has appeared.

thisreallyisnotok · 2023-11-27T17:16:53+00:00

If it’s a first date with someone you don’t know well, then you’d be right to be suspicious of someone who acted this way.

LillthOfBabylon · 2023-11-27T20:35:09+00:00

women have gotten so used to poor treatment, many don't know how to respond when treated well

Can we stop being condescending and treating all women like helpless victims? It’s fucking insulting.

SecondEldenLord · 2023-11-27T21:06:44+00:00

Shittiest excuse I ever heard. It is not ones fault but your own for picking the wrong men. You have an almost endless pool of men that would date you but it so happens that you pick the wrong one just cause he is hot and once you get an actual good guy, then all of the sudden you don't know what to do? That is a shitty excuse just to not take any accountability for your actions and mistakes. I swear, accountability is like kriptonite for women.

fakingandnotmakingit · 2023-11-27T18:36:06+00:00

It is weird, because that's a lot for a first date.

It signals waaaay too much serious intent for a date that's essentially a "let's see if we should pursue this further"

Your bf doing that on the other hand wouldn't be weird. It would be romantic

MistyMaisel · 2023-11-27T17:13:30+00:00

I think there's some truth to it. I mean Taylor Tomlinson has a decent joke about thinking everything is a guy's "move" to get with them and get sex.

I know it was kind of unusual and I was quite wary of men by the time I was in my mid 20s. So I can somewhat agree.

KayRay1994 · 2023-11-27T17:16:44+00:00

it was a well known phenomena as a whole; you see this happen a lot with people who come out of abusive households or have had a string of abusive relationships. ie. good treatment feels wrong, or boring, or off putting because

1) you’re not used to it - so then the thought of a catch being involved or actively assuming the worst and acting on it to be ‘ready’ becomes the norm

2) the emotional highs and lows are the norm for you, you don’t know what moderate and healthy love is

of course, we aren’t talking about abuse here - but it is the same philosophy and psychology, albeit, in a smaller extent

macone235 · 2023-11-27T20:02:58+00:00

I'd say more so they prefer it. Women like chaos and excitement. A peaceful and caring man is a negative that will have to be made up for with other positive qualities such as physical appearance and money.

Geselshaft · 2023-11-27T20:37:26+00:00

This is just women making excuses for non-chads. “Chad”, the meme hot guy, is adorable with flowers. Melvin is a gross neckbeard, so flowers means he’s a rapist.

No matter what women here say, that’s all it means. Remember. It’s always lies.

This is just another “ick” thing women do to mess with men. Notice the games women play about opening doors, don’t open doors, pay for meals, don’t pay for meals, all just lies that always comes down to, if the guy is a handsome Chad meme it’s good. If it’s a not-handsome Melvin, it’s bad. So they can go to their friend group and claim they were wanted my Melvin and rejected him (social clout by rejections) or he was Chad The Romantic (social clout for being pursued by Chad).

No matter what they win. Then claim the bar is on the floor, which is just women lying some more.

In conclusion, all questions can be answered when you realize this, and stop listening to what women claim. It’s just lies.

DimensionVegetable37 · 2023-11-27T23:43:04+00:00

Women do not like simps. That simple. Women like status. Money, power, fame are all things that come from a status. Having status is how women compete with other women. Instagram is the battleground of status for women. When women marry a dude of status she often uses it as her own like she accomplished something.

So your question. Why do women like men who treat them poorly?

Because men of status have options. She has options. Treating her well is what simps do. Women don't like simps. Simps are like annoying fans. So a dude who treats her bad also must have and hate female simps too. It's a sign of status of you have more simps.

Why is chivalry dead? Because chivalry was the old world way of simping. So it's ironic women complain about men being simps while at the same time asking why men don't simp anymore. When they do more than ever.

If you want proof. Look at famous abuse cases. Women will stay with abusive men. But the abuse is only an issue when he rejects her. Because abuse isn't the problem. It's the man of status taking that status away from her.

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Vyan_of_Yierdimfeil · 2023-11-27T17:52:25+00:00

I think we're viewing these interactions through lenses as though we haven't come off a huge women empowerment movement in the past few decades.

It isn't that they're used to poor treatment, it's that they want to be treated as equals. Society has been telling women they deserve the pursuit of happiness as much as their male counterparts, and instilling the competence to achieve it without the help of a man. Then when they go on dates with dudes who try to coddle them, it almost feels like they're being condescended to. The dynamic worked when women were largely dependent on their partners, and these gestures were a trial run for the man to show his competency in performing them; but that dynamic is no longer relevant.

I want to cover my tracks by saying that this is not a one size fits all conclusion. Traditional women still exist and would love to be treated like the woman in the video. As always, to each their own. One way of finding a compatible partner is not inherently better or morally superior so long as all parties benefit and are happy with the outcome. I just think the woman in the video hasn't had the epiphany where she realizes she doesn't want that kind of dynamic of being coddled/pampered in her relationships.

SeveralLiterature980 · 2023-11-27T18:04:08+00:00

Typically, if you control for physical attractiveness, women prefer so called 'nice guys' over 'bad boys.'

Women prefer men they have high physical attraction for who treat them poorly to less attractive men who treat them well.

Not all women, mind you

WANT_SOME_HAM · 2023-11-27T18:28:28+00:00

If you hold women's intelligence in such contempt you don't think they know how to react to "being treated well" and have to do their thinking for them, you sure as shit aren't "treating them well".

And bringing a girl flowers on a first date is weird anyway.

bottleblank · 2023-11-27T18:42:40+00:00

Alright, and when men act unexpectedly or incorrectly when paid a compliment or asked out because their only (rare) experience of that has been that somebody's trying to scam/harm/insult/abuse/laugh at them...?

DapperDan1929 · 2023-11-27T18:43:56+00:00

In America anyway, flowers on a first date is a bit much. It’s usually the consequence of being given bad advice

East_Effort_9813 · 2023-11-27T18:53:01+00:00

No that is too much for a first date. A guy shouldn't put a woman on a pedestal . This is going to sound weird but you should treat a woman the way you would treat a woman cousin you haven't seen in a while. See what's going on in her life, poke a little fun and make a couple of jokes. Don't treat her like she's a goddess no matter how hot she is.

Zabadoodude · 2023-11-27T18:54:42+00:00

Flowers om a first date is weird because it breaks social norms.

Women (and men) with experience know that the best relationships are reciprocal. The guy that takes you to a nice restaurant and gets you flowers before he even knows you and has gotten no sign of affection from you, is not necessarily the best partner. He's probably just a little weird and desperate.

SlyStocks · 2023-11-27T19:09:33+00:00

Looks are far more important than treatment.

If a guy is super hot to her, any treatment will do, including flowers and what not.

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-11-27T19:38:07+00:00

It's what they chose, they prefer it.

Many times, friends and family, I've seen women chose the hot bad boy who treats them badly, over the nice guy when they are young and childless. They do it cuz they value what that man brings more than other men. Generally looks and fun times.

Sure they get use to bad treatment, but they also get use to amazingly hot sex, the thing they went for him for in the first place. Everything has trade offs.

anon-sucks · 2023-11-28T02:57:41+00:00

Women only get treated badly when they chase the bad boy. That’s not about how men treat women, that’s about self inflicted wounds.

WilliamWyattD · 2023-11-28T08:46:37+00:00

Women want dominant men with a masculine nature who are capable of extreme aggression, but control themselves except when needed.

At the end of the day, the flowers or holding doors won't make or break you. But they will cause her to immediately laser focus on your dominance and strength or personality levels. If you are weak, this behavior will highlite it and she will next you fast. But she would have eventually anyways. If you are strong, then when she sees that, the flowers and door holding will seem like charming, old school behavior.

Chemical_Major_1403 · 2023-11-28T18:27:31+00:00

What?! Now OP is just kissing women's @$$ for fun, how can someone not know how to respond to nice treatment ?! And how do you know she was mistreated?! Until we get rid of " Women = angel / men = shit " I don't think this sub will be entertaining?! .

If scarlet johansen cook for you on a first date wouldn't you find it confusing since she is the price , women aim way higher so when those men actually start acting nice even for a small time women definitely gonna be confused .

How can mistreatment and princess treatment be in the same ideology . MEN either simps who put women who don't want men no more on a pedestal or men are mistreating women , choose one and stop being a pick me OP

Title	CMV: women have gotten so used to poor treatment, many don't know how to respond when treated well
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	0
Comments	167
Date	November 27, 2023 4:48 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1857e43/cmv_women_have_gotten_so_used_to_poor_treatment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-women-have-gotten-so-used-to-poor-treatment.1239461 https://theredarchive.com/post/1239461

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