Do men or women have a better understanding of the average dating experience of the other gender?

Marketing_Baboon · 2021-02-20T20:36:35+00:00

Hard to say. I think the average man knows it’s very easy for women to get dates, but underestimate how hard it is to find a quality guy to keep dating. I don’t think the average woman has any idea how hard dating is for the average man, just none whatsoever.

wtknight · 2021-02-20T20:44:57+00:00

I think that men have a better understanding, because women don't really pay much attention to the men whom they're not attracted to and their experiences, and this is most men. On the other hand, men don't pay attention to every woman, but they are much more likely to pay attention to average women than women are to average men, mostly because men want to have sex with those average women.

sorebum405 · 2021-02-20T21:55:40+00:00

I would say men understand the average dating experience of women more than the other way around.The reason why I say this is because men desire women far more than women desire men.So men are forced to understand what women go through in dating if they wanna be successful when dating women.

Women on the other hand are generally the ones being pursued,and it's the man job to impress them,and have "game".Women don't need to understand what men go through when dating because there the more desirable sex.

It's like when your trying to get a job.The employeer is not gonna care that much about your life,and what your financial needs are,but they definitely want you to know alot about the company.That's probably not the best analogy,but I think you can understand what i'm saying.

Severe-Pirate · 2021-02-20T20:46:09+00:00

Hard to say. In my opinion, I’d probably say men. In recent years, western men are starting to understand how relatively easy it is for women to secure a partner regardless of her looks, financial status, education, etc. Now, whether said partner is high or low quality is a bit more subjective. Also, women tend not to care too much about the plight of undesirable or average men on the dating scene. Thus, many of them don’t have a firm understanding on just how hard it is for certain men to attract members of the opposite sex.

Aldabruzzo · 2021-02-20T20:39:43+00:00

Men, by far and away.

The single biggest problem women have in dating is finding a sufficiently attractive man to stay with them long term. The female dilemma is:

The hot guys I like fucking won't stick around and aren't relationship material. The guys who do stick around and are relationship material aren't attractive and I can barely stand to fuck them.

Men keenly understand that dilemma. They understand intellectually that women have that dilemma, repeatedly explicate that understanding, and offer solutions, which women handwave and bat away as all insufficient and unsatisfactory.

I know this is women's biggest dating problem because every one of them complains about it constantly. Or has complained about it. Most of you married men you settled for and complain about that constantly.

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-02-20T21:19:23+00:00

I'm pretty sure that men have a better understanding in general because a lot of us have an "outside looking in" perspective. Most women will never really understand men's lack of options and success in dating because most women will never have to experience it. The only thing men will probably not understand about women is how hard it is to find what they're looking for.

Women are basically picking through a pit of shiny rocks to find the diamonds.

Men are basically having to gather the funds, tools and materials, find a suitable spot, and start digging, hoping to find something of value at all.

DrPete_Venkman · 2021-02-20T20:57:42+00:00

I'd say men understand the average woman's experience more, but due to male sexuality, they process it differently. Basically we each have a lens through which we view data, and that lens is going to showcase different dimensions. For example, if the atrocity that is social media and OLD has taught us anything, it's that the average woman in the US has an almost unlimited amount of options, especially if she is thin. Men view this one way, and women view it another. We're looking at the same data set usually, but interpretations will vary wildly.

2021-02-21T09:24:39+00:00

Women look at struggling men like upper class people look at the homeless.

So men easy

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-02-21T03:44:48+00:00

What's this "understanding" thing about? The fact is that males do not interact with other males as a female sex to which the males behavior changes to accommodate and (court/mate with/etc) the female - vs males interacting with other males talking about women with 'boys'.

They will never "experience" males like a female in the context of mating and vice versa. That is why males and females will NEVER agree on what an "asshole" is. The "asshole male" men see is not the same 'asshole' the female sees/gets when he is wrapped up all cozy in her legs at night.

moneygang4life · 2021-02-20T20:46:54+00:00

Men cuz they are the ones struggling with it so they are ones who put time into learning about it

vvvqvvv · 2021-02-20T20:39:17+00:00

I think men overestimate how "easy" it is for women. Women underestimate how "hard" it is for men.

ThisIsMyAccount146 · 2021-02-20T20:40:57+00:00

Women vastly overestimate by n count. Because I'm decent looking and horny. They usually guess 30+

eisenkatze · 2021-02-20T20:45:38+00:00

I think it is a rare individual who really tries to understand the experiences of others at all, especially dating. I think the best advantage is hanging out in an all-opposite gender friend group, but I don't know which gender does it more commonly. I think women's experiences are much more often reported in Western media, as women are probably more willing to talk about their emotional lives, but I don't always find it very insightful or realistic - lots of "fuckbois be like this amirite gurls" memes and not that much about building strong relationships which I find more important.

King8Kaista · 2021-02-21T06:27:53+00:00

Women most definitely don’t understand

fancy_leftovers · 2021-02-20T20:43:06+00:00

So many other things come into context.

Sexual orientation, location, availability, attractiveness, financial class, occupation my god. I think attractiveness and class makes a larger difference in dating experience than even gender.

I wouldn't even understand the dating experience of a woman my age who is healthy, wealthy, and lives in a diverse and well populated city.

superlurkage · 2021-02-21T05:08:36+00:00

They know but don’t care

Because people want what they want. A sizable minority of each gender is unabashedly exploiting the other, so no quarter or sympathy will be given

TypesWithEmojis · 2021-02-20T20:41:35+00:00

The comprehension on both sides will be pretty low. Perception is reality.

NotGoingoutofMW · 2021-02-21T02:31:54+00:00

On average men. Men are are going insanely long ways to get better at dating, at least in some point in their lifes. This includes usually to look it from the women's perspective. However most women don't even bother looking at all men, the strugglers are invisible anyway.

Also 99% of womens dating problems aren't women's problems by definition. This are problems caused by options which men would also have everytime they somehow get the sex problem temporarily out of the way and attractive men also have. They just don't overblow it like women or don't even see it as a problem at all (If you have to run away from the bear, you don't care if your shoes getting dirty). Of course this is from a rough general point of view.

MasterTeacher123 · 2021-02-21T11:15:31+00:00

One of the problems is that men/women have fundamental disagreements on what an “average” person of the other gender looks like lol.

Until you solve that, or come to an agreement with that, all these threads will look like shit shows

2021-02-21T14:03:25+00:00

Women do because they have more opportunities in modern society.

IcarusKiki · 2021-02-22T03:59:19+00:00

Both sexes have apex fallacy bad.

Caring_Cactus · 2021-02-20T20:35:56+00:00

Neither, that'd be hard to prove, we're all first and foremost humans regardless of gender.

King_D0ng · 2021-02-20T21:04:31+00:00

Honestly I don't think there's a right answer to this. Both genders greatly underestimate the problems faced by the opposite gender because they don't have any truly comparable experience. For example, I don't think most men can ever truly empathize with how much unwanted attention women get. It is simply too contrary to the male experience. On the flip side, most women can't actually empathize with the absolute lack of sexual attention a man can recieve even when they aren't doing anything "wrong" .

If I had to pick I'd say men understand women's dating problems better. Not because men are better at empathy, but because it's slightly easier to imagine going from nothing to too much of something than it is to imagine going from too much to nothing.

decoy88 · 2021-02-21T00:00:49+00:00

Both men and women are shit-tier at empathy skills.

Mimoxs · 2021-02-20T22:33:43+00:00

I don't get this whole "women have no idea how hard it is" thing, I think most women have a solid grasp on the fact that most dudes can barely ever get laid

I think one thing I haven't seen at all here yet from any of the men commenting - which kinda proves the point - is men do not at all think about safety/risk/fear factor for women. I think it just genuinely never crosses their mind.

Atlas__B__Shruggin · 2021-02-20T21:21:50+00:00

neither. male and female solipsism are adamantine in their ignorance of the experience of the opposite sex particularly in the most intimate of experiences

AutoModerator · 2021-02-20T20:27:06+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

SpaceS4t4n · 2021-02-21T14:12:49+00:00

Neither. We're all just throwing darts here.

SaBahRub · 2021-02-20T22:04:04+00:00

Doesn’t matter

There’s still not enough sex to go around

hesipullupjimbo445 · 2021-02-21T03:36:13+00:00

I think both understand each other’s experiences somewhat equally, the thing is neither one really cares. Women have no reason to care that most men can’t get laid. It does nothing for them and it doesn’t apply to the men they find attractive. Men don’t care that women may struggle to get their dream relationship because the average guy can’t get casual sex. However, men do have to be more receptive and sympathetic towards it or at least act that way. If they don’t they run the risk of a lecture on “toxic masculinity” and being called a misogynist. This isn’t even including the guys that will tell a woman whatever she wants to hear with the hope that she’ll have sex with him.

John_Oakman · 2021-02-20T21:57:48+00:00

Women obviously understand better at the tactical level (i.e. short term), hence them (especially the FDS kweens) generally able to extract what they want from the males with minimal effort & resources expended.

Strategically (i.e. long term)? It's a crapshoot. Especially since it's difficult to truly know if the most of the long term singles (of both gender) are actually happy as such or being all sour grapes about not bagging the 10 that they totally deserves.

Danger3214 · 2021-02-20T23:58:56+00:00

No one does.

2021-02-22T02:30:02+00:00

Women know everything. Men know nothing.

Title	Do men or women have a better understanding of the average dating experience of the other gender?
Author	PickleLine
Upvotes	37
Comments	344
Date	February 20, 2021 8:27 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/lofw4x/do_men_or_women_have_a_better_understanding_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-men-or-women-have-a-better-understanding-of-the.744519 https://theredarchive.com/post/744519

Comments