Women do use dating apps, but they stop using them quicker than men because they work for them

szclimber · 2023-10-03T17:20:41+00:00

Anecdotally. At least half of women looking for a LTR find it in less than a week of online dating. Fat women or those with a lot of baggage can struggle.

wtknight · 2023-10-03T14:29:27+00:00

Of course, later they find out they have to share those guys, or those guys have no interest in commitment and family and marriage

So then they don’t work for women. They would get back on them if they thought that they would eventually work.

Opening_Tell9388 · 2023-10-03T14:15:12+00:00

Idk. I'm a man and I don't use dating apps. Also not acting like I'm morally superior to anyone. I just rather go and meet people outside.

DesertShifter · 2023-10-03T15:03:12+00:00

People keep bringing up dating apps as if there's a reason to discuss them any more. We know the abysmal rates for even getting a match, so the obvious answer is to just go outside and approach. It doesn't take much to get laid IRL because it's never been easier as a guy to stand out IRL. 45% of young men (18-25) have never approached a woman, so if you're at a bar with young people half of the competition just doesn't exist, the remaining half is likely fat and dressed like shit, so all it takes for you to stand out is to have the balls to approach strangers, be thin or fit, and dress well. Add in competent social skills on top of all that and you're practically set.

at least men get more than zero chances by swiping right with no effort

But you do have to make an effort, you have to spend time swiping and then texting a match that will likely go nowhere. Men flock to OLD because you don't have to approach, the fear of a hard rejection makes thousands of soft rejections tolerable but all its really doing is isolating you from the world.

Snalesdofeel · 2023-10-03T17:53:28+00:00

Women cruising through the dating life on easy mode. One day in a mans shoes and they¨d be curled up in the fetal position.

kevie_in_houston · 2023-10-03T22:25:13+00:00

Dating apps give the impression that women are able to access the types of men (men who look like male models, etc.) whom they never been able to access before in their life. In reality, most women are unable to retain these men or, even, date/meet these men in real life. Dating apps provide the illusion of choice.

Aromatic-Time3568 · 2023-10-03T16:40:44+00:00

It's false that women on apps only base swipes on looks. Maybe hookup seekers, but not those looking for a husband. Those that are serious about finding a LTR will do it based on a combination of looks and profile attributes. Those seeking serious relationships also tend to date slightly "down" when it comes to looks because they know that marriages where the woman is more physically attractive than the man tend to be happier, more stable marriages.

This is why men should swipe slightly above thier league, complete thier profiles, and make it clear that they are looking for something stable and long term (major bonus points if you want kids and highlight this on your profile). Swiping up in age also helps because as women get older, they get more motivated to settle down and have kids. Take advantage of their ticking biological clocks.

I can say that as a marriage minded app user, I intentionally swiped left on obvious "chads". Anyone with a 6 pack photo or gym selfies got auto left swiped. I also paid for premium so I could set strict filters and only be visible to guys that met my profile criteria. I valued profile substance over looks but still got lucky and ended up with a BF who's an equal level of attractiveness to me and who has the same goals.

Also, it's not just your profile that counts. Marriage/relationship minded women can easily be lost during the messaging phase. Keep things non-sexual, be kind, and don't go too long before asking her out on a date. Be assertive. We've dealt with so many lazy, entitled f*ck boys that expect us to chase them that being chased for a change is refreshing. Pick a specific date, time, and place and be the first to ask. I unmatched guys that just texted for several days and never asked for a date. Shows a lack of interest and initiative.

ReplacementPasta · 2023-10-03T14:16:11+00:00

From what I have heard, it's mostly just a waste of time. Most guys on tinder tend to look for ONS and are swiping right on everyone, others are just uninteresing and arent compatible with you and are swiping right on everyone, and some just lack basic social skills. Its like searching a needle in the haystack.

I know exactly 1 couple who met on dating apps.

Thatshygurl · 2023-10-03T14:56:25+00:00

Dating apps work for no one. Their interest is in making a profit, not in partnering people up.

It’s really difficult for women to know if they are attracted to a guy based on some photos and a couple prompts about them. We need to see how a man carries himself, how he interacts with others, how he walks, talks, etc. I can’t tell you how many times I thought a guy was ok in attractiveness and then when I’ve met him in person been WAY more attracted.

There’s a reason why the proportion of men to women on dating apps is so skewed. Women don’t find men attractive on dating apps, causing us to become more and more selective.

Ultimately dating apps work for no one. They don’t work for men to attract women and they don’t work for women to find a man. There sole purpose is profit, always keep that in mind.

iampenguing · 2023-10-03T15:41:02+00:00

Some Western women come back to dating apps when they realize the Chad they chose has other options and doesnt need to settle down with them. Then they go again with the next Chad and repeat until they reach their 30s or so. The pool of men that have all the relationships and sex in their 20s is increasingly smaller and the men that women often complain about are part of this small pool of men that get all the relationships and sex. Over 95% of men in their 20s I would say dont get relationships or sex anyway in developed Western countries..

I live in a very developed Western country and have had sex with one woman from my country in the last 3 years. Ive had sex with 3 women from other countries during this same time. But im sure that has nothing to do with Western women and its all in my head

Hot-Law2682 · 2023-10-03T16:52:14+00:00

Why do people have this idea that most successful men hate commitment and are all looking to sleep around? By successful men I mean social, decently attractive dudes with a solid job or future prospects. I am not referring to social media millionaires or pro athletes, they are on a whole different level.

First of all, only 30% of men report using dating apps for hookups so they are a minority off of that.
https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/02/key-findings-about-online-dating-in-the-u-s/

Additionally, 80% if sex happens within committed relationships (and poly/open relationships are still very rare). If we go by the redpill/blackpill idea that only successful men have sex this means most successful men are also in relationships.
https://datepsychology.com/how-many-sexual-partners-did-men-and-women-have-in-2021/

Also, theres just the fact that only 40% of young women are single so plenty have found someone willing to stick around.

Financial_Leave4411 · 2023-10-03T16:01:29+00:00

Women usually leave a dating app in disgust not because they have a date. Most women last about a week and then they run for the hills. Every few years women will try the app again forgetting how bad it really was and hoping it changed but it never does so they give up again. Wash rinse repeat.

mlo9109 · 2023-10-03T15:33:12+00:00

HAHAHA, no. I "take breaks" from dating apps as a woman because I get exhausted by them and need to do so for my mental health. I've been at this for 5 years and I'm fed up.

punapearebane · 2023-10-03T16:43:13+00:00

Its a waste of time even for women. Yes You get 100 matches and they are all chatting. But you have to filter out 99 of them over the period of a week because they arent serious in their intentions/they follow Andrew Tate and so on. And the one who is starts stalking you.

Its not all so black and white.

ratboi34 · 2023-10-03T14:40:20+00:00

It does indeed work for women that are wifey material and women that only look for hookups. Every woman that is wifey and uses daring apps will find a man very quickly. That's what I have seen with my female friends. The females with issues, bad personalities for relationships, that truly chase chads and always have this feeling that they could do better will become chronic online dating users.

richard_golbes · 2023-10-03T15:34:00+00:00

they work for them

&

Of course, later they find out they have to share those guys, or those guys have no interest in commitment and family and marriage

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januaryphilosopher · 2023-10-03T16:59:22+00:00

From what I can tell, they're deleting them without getting anywhere. Ask any woman why she tried apps and doesn't use them any more. The usual response: "I hated it".

januaryphilosopher · 2023-10-03T17:00:44+00:00

From what I can tell, they're deleting them without getting anywhere. Ask any woman why she tried apps and doesn't use them any more. The usual response: "I hated it".

thetruthishere_ · 2023-10-03T17:40:35+00:00

I stopped using an app years back when I tried one because it was a shit show. I didnt even make it a week.

Ok_Smile_60 · 2023-10-03T18:54:40+00:00

This. Women get a ton of willing dudes, pick some, and either get a good one or get burned.

Men just keep getting nothing and jumping at anything so they rarely reach either end of the spectrum

Over_North8884 · 2023-10-04T08:34:48+00:00

Most women quit dating apps because the attractive ones get demands for sex or nudes while the ugly ones get bullied.

obviousredflag · 2023-10-04T11:26:30+00:00

in fact most couples meet online now

Online, but not on online DATING APPS. That would be only ~12%.

In apps, women are blind to other features they may like in men if they use apps.

That is true for attractive as well as unattractive men. As you said, women have enough attractive men they match with, so they can only focus on that pool to find out about their other features. Attractive men are not less likely to have good features the women like. Unattractive men are not more likely to have good features that women might like if they gave them a chance.

Title	Women do use dating apps, but they stop using them quicker than men because they work for them
Author	Amiskon2
Upvotes	54
Comments	114
Date	October 3, 2023 2:03 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/16ysss4/women_do_use_dating_apps_but_they_stop_using_them/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-do-use-dating-apps-but-they-stop-using-them.1233882 https://theredarchive.com/post/1233882

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