Dating, Marriage, and life is full of Female Privelege

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-04-19T10:11:17+00:00

Removed for OP abandonment

EulenWatcher · 2022-04-19T05:04:16+00:00

So women get all these advantages, and the only cost they have is the occasional pregnancy and periods.

I don't think there's any point in trying to "change you mind", but I provide a few links just in case you'll actually read them.

Pregnancy and giving birth are risky.

1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed, 2.8% attempted). About 3% of American men—or 1 in 33—have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.

Some 47,000 women and girls worldwide were killed by their infimate partners or other family members in 2020. I know someone will bring up stats for men - and the numbers for killed men will be significantly higher and, of course, it's an issue too, but far less men are killed by their intimate partners.

The prevalence of major depression is higher in women than in men, in 2010 its global annual prevalence was 5.5% and 3.2%, respectively, representing a 1.7-fold greater incidence in women

One in 200 American women suffers from anorexia. Two to three in 100 American women suffers from bulimia. 1.1% - 4.2% of females suffer from bulimia nervosa in their lifetime. As many as 10% of college women suffer from a clinical or nearly clinical eating disorder, including 5.1% who suffer from bulimia nervosa.

https://www.mirasol.net/learning-center/eating-disorder-statistics.php#:~:text=One%20in%20200%20American%20women,who%20suffer%20from%20bulimia%20nervosa.

I do admit there's a major caveat in almost all of these stats related to men far rarer seeking help whether for their mental issues or sexual/domestic violence. Pregnancy risks are only women's though. Even considering that men's issues are heavily underreported it doesn't mean women don't experience these issues or that they aren't affected more by some of them.

Unrelated links that you might find interesting nonetheless:

A third of married women outearn their husbands.

Men aren't really happy about it, but they also feel the most pressure when they're sole providers.

But, no, outearning wives don't have higher divorce risks.

Most married mothers still work

Men’s disproportionate strain of divorce is transient, whereas women’s is chronic

gate18 · 2022-04-19T05:02:04+00:00

It's because the patriarchal system made it so that any woman that asked the man was considered a slut.
- I would bet that the cell and bro channels would agree with that
- work in removing this stigma and things will change.
so let's educate men to not fear rejection.
"hey baby, why would you not smile.", "don't act like you don't like male attention", "if you didn't want it why did you dress like that".
to hell with what they think their god-given right is, not all of them marry up. When a man is dating a woman, the woman is also dating the man! so the time they are spending together, yes, could be spent on each achieving self-fulfillment, plenty of people bo both, plenty of people can't so they pick one.
men are expected to be providers because of the patriarchy. Men, have to realize they are individual humans, hence, unless (as it has happened with women throughout history) men are being fiscally forced to be the providers then can forget the "virgin" and in cell crap and go for a mate that is of the same station as them.
- the article you provide says "Men are especially likely to place a greater emphasis on their role as financial providers. ... men are less likely than women to say the same about women.
  - so men are expecting men. So they should change.
"A Man should just as easily be able to marry up and live of a Woman's labor" I 100% agree with that but the red pill poppers and conservative machos disagree. Every now and then I argue with people that pretend "man is a provider because of nature/evolution".
Bull.
the 30-35-year-olds that are happily married will disagree.
exaggerated. But the solution is simple, don't have kids! The woman is the baby-maker, there's no way out of it. It should be a crime to make a human being grow something inside them if they do not want to. The laws around child support (I dought the issue is as messed up as they are made to be) should change if they are as bad as a father that can't afford child support is made to pay. If he can afford it... he was involved in the creation on the kid.
The reason why women have a strong fried network is that men are told not to share their feeling, they are "manly", so instead they bottle their feeling up, and, in my opinion, that's why they die early and why they commit more suicides (**I haven't researched it just a hunch).

I have a strong feeling if feminism gets the society it advocates for (not the one "Alpha-bros" tell you feminism wants), most of these issues would be fixed.

I'm a man, from what I hear from women, I would not want to be a woman in the west. Most of what you described are shitty but under my control. I can not settle for a woman that wants me to be a provider. I can not leave a woman pregnant (if she wants me to and I don't, I can not be with her).

I can tell the macho narrative to fuck off. I can find people that I can share my feelings with. I can go to therapy, I can leave the difficult jobs, difficult people (be they women) behind me.

Also

It's unlikely that I will be harassed.
It's less likely to be rapped.
I can jerk off all I want, leave anyone pregnant and no law would harm me. Unlike anti-abortion laws.
I am free day and night.
I can dress however I like and not be accused that "I was asking to be raped".

Overall I recommend being a man. Especially if you are self-reliant and 100% assured in yourself. If your identity is easily shaken by what others think then yes, we are living in shaky times.

Gone are the days when women had to get married or else bring shame to everyone in the family and (at best) be seen as strange by others.

Thank fuck for that.

doggiedoc2004 · 2022-04-19T04:47:29+00:00

I’m not sad women in western countries have gained our reproductive freedom. We can employ our Darwinian right to select for the fitness of our mates. This means providing resources (emotional, financial, and labor) in equal measure to what we bring to the table (which is now the same as men PLUS we bear children.) Why should we spend our reproductive, emotional and financial capital on people who think like this who would not be a net gain for us and our offspring?

the_lazy_orange · 2022-04-19T04:02:53+00:00

Seeing the men in this sub talk like this make me want to stay single and childless forever. Completely delusional that you think women, as a class, “oppress” men. In many societies, women couldn’t wipe their own asses without a male guardian say-so. Women are not the world leaders keeping men “down”. We, just like men, are just trying to figure out our best opportunities to survive in our ever changing world.

throwaway164_3 · 2022-04-19T05:09:09+00:00

Life isn’t fair.

Let go of the bitterness, hate, expectations, envy, jealousy and just try to accept and live in every moment in the brief time we have on earth.

Aliebaba99 · 2022-04-19T07:33:02+00:00

Im pretty sure being a man also has its advantages in life.

ruboyuri · 2022-04-19T07:36:41+00:00

The incentives exist because men like and want sex more than women

No one is forcing anyone to offer them; it’s carrots, not sticks

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-04-19T10:18:49+00:00

Men are systemically opressed into doing all the work. Men have to initiate

I agree. This is the burden of initiating. Some women would crumble at the amount of daily rejection men get, and then act like men don't have it hard.

The above also results in Women getting better deals

It does not. Statistically, everyone punches up. Whoever initiates tends to punch up.

This also results in Women having more self-esteem

Sure.

This self-esteem allows Women to do better in life;

Let's not pretend like women have advantages outside of dating. Men still have it made bro.

Women still think they have a God-given right to marry up, even though under 30 Women are outearning Men

This is only happening in major cities and only as recent as this year, and could be attributed to more women finishing degrees. But yes, high earning women overvalue their monetary worth as sexual market value.

On the flip side, most Women no longer have the domestic skills they used to

This is a bad argument because most men don't know how to do traditional man stuff anymore either. They can't fix cars, be handy, do carpentry, etc.

When it comes to physical attractiveness, Men rate Women linerally.

I think you mean "linearly", but yes I agree.

To add on, finding "love" at 30-35 after being denied in your formidable years is not love

If you've never loved, how could you define it for someone else?

A Woman can abort a kid, abandon it no questions asked, or raise it and extract a guy for child support. A Man has no say. If he wants the kid, he cannot stop the Woman from aborting

This is just a bad take, sorry bro. If it's not your body, you have no say. I don't care about your 'Christian values'.

And since Women have stronger friend networks (not sure why), can easily get a kid via a one-night stand or a sperm bank, they do not even need love as much despite having it so much easier.

Also false. Women want love as much or more than men.

Philip8000 · 2022-04-19T04:29:43+00:00

Given the experiences of many of the women I've known, I've got to disagree with this. My sister's been stalked more than once, had an ex who stranded her on the side of the road out of pure spite, and numerous other stories I don't intend to share. Another woman I know who spent her senior year of school being harassed, and more survivors than I ever thought I'd encounter.

Dating sucks for everyone and social skills play a big role in that, as I've said many times. I'm on the autism spectrum and painfully aware of how much it cripples me in daily interactions. But the idea that this is some kind of conscious strategy to oppress men is a load of nonsense.

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2022-04-19T04:25:53+00:00

True oppression is not having the girls you want pursue you?

doyoulikemywood · 2022-04-19T04:26:36+00:00

It’s sad that you fell into this trap. You need to fix this thinking before you’ll find a decent partner. If you went on a 100 dates, I don’t see any of them lasting more than 2-3 dates because this is your mentality. I’m sure the women you interact with can smell it coming from a mile away.

BeautifulTomatillo · 2022-04-19T05:10:26+00:00

Maybe I’m just completely socially inept but why are dating and sexual relationships so important to some men. To the point where you become so bitter and hateful. Why not centre your life around something meaningful and productive ? Why is romance so important ? Really would like anyone to answer.

Remarkable_Ad_2469 · 2022-04-19T07:04:02+00:00

It's only privilege to you cause you hold no more power or control. It's literally eating you alive.

dietwindows · 2022-04-19T03:49:31+00:00

If you examine the major world religions, you'll find one thing thats consistently considered a virtue is humility, (meaning the degree to which a person has the need to see themselves as better than others.)

Its often considered a cardinal virtue; perhaps the most important thing for a person to have a healthy mind. And if you examine people who have soft lives, you'll generally find an absence of humility.

Don't be jealous of people with apparently good fortunes, and don't be jealous of evil people. Life is rarely what it seems. Have gratitude for what you have and you'll be more blessed than those who you used to envy.

ScarAdvanced9562 · 2022-04-19T03:45:19+00:00

Life in the first world is full of female privilege as a whole. Dating and Marriage are not special and shouldn’t be regarded as special like what you’re doing.

sarkington · 2022-04-19T06:34:25+00:00

Men too could be privileged if they did what women do all the time —- say “no thanks”

Don’t wanna support a family? Then don’t

Don’t wanna make a first move? Then don’t; sex workers exist

I see no one forcing men to date and marry these horrible soulless creatures called women. I have no idea why you even want to spend a second of non-sexual time with them

Willow-girl · 2022-04-19T05:48:40+00:00

I can crochet, stich / embroidery a little, bake, and especially raise kids. I can raise kids better than any Woman I've met but because of my gender I'm systemically opressed into being a provider.

Umm, since you have all of these skills and think women have it so easy, why not switch teams? It's 2022; you can do that now, you know!

Available-Ad-9338 · 2022-04-19T06:30:15+00:00

Expecting men to make the first move is not "oppression" lmao. You clearly have no idea what that word means. Women finally having the advantage in the dating market after MEN have had the advantage for 2000+ years isn't oppression of men. Cry me a fucking river.

sunkized · 2022-04-19T06:45:35+00:00

Not worth it to deal with menstruation. I take pills to stop that from happening anyway.

If I was a guy I wouldn't even date. I would just work and see strippers/escorts. That's what most of my coworkers do now. The happiest I ever was is when I had the money for sw.

mmm_try_again12345 · 2022-04-19T03:51:46+00:00

Sorry you’re so discouraged. As someone who agrees with you on a lot of the problems of modern women, dating, etc...yeah it’s tough but having a defeatist attitude is not the way to go.

All great men have fought uphill battles, with the majority of their peers not understanding, ignoring, or flat out mocking the challenges they faced. You can do it bro. There is a good woman out there somewhere, just remember, carry yourself like a MAN.

Your attitude shouldn’t be ‘women have all the privilege and it’s tough for men’ (even though that is correct)...your attitude should be ‘women have privilege in modern dating but I don’t care because I’m going to be the best man I can be’. The women worth being with still respond well to traditionally masculine men.

Carloverguy20 · 2022-04-19T04:42:22+00:00

What in Incel tarnation are you on about lol.

Men benefit more in marriage than woman does, who runs the country men, who are majority of the buisnessmen, ceos, leaders: Men.

Redpillers, manospherians, mgtowers are so uninformed.

Women are still held to a higher standard in society, women are shamed if they have OF, single moms, are feminists, non-tradtional.

DorianneGrey · 2022-04-19T03:57:41+00:00

u/flamingcoochies ? Is that you? No mention of cuck culture but I’m pretty sure…

spicysaucegood · 2022-04-19T05:19:55+00:00

But it's also easier for men, because they're raised and taught "this is the way it is". You guys are trained from birth to be the initiators, the tough go-getters. That's why we applaud women when they initiate without that expectation. That's also why we applaud men for being good fathers, because they weren't trained to care about that stuff, and because there's less of them than good mothers.
However, women do initiate too. And they also experience rejection. And it's also rare for women to find high quality partners. If you as a man feel that dating a particular woman is a "losing deal" then 1 don't date her, 2 if she truly is better-than-nothing then act like it! - be grateful, and be humble.
As women, it's common for us to compare our beauty to that of other women's. I believe there are more insecure women than confident women. For a good portion of women, that male validation they get, that you think is spoiling them, is their only means of feeling worthy of love at all. It isn't ego-inflation, It's women feeling not good enough without that attention. Bottom line is the idea that women are walking around with higher self-esteem is inaccurate.
I disagree about women having more self-esteem than men, or that women think they have a god-given right to any man. Women are more realistic and fair than you give them credit for.
I disagree again to your notion that women won't date down. I believe that the data showing women dating up is the result of women dating available men that they are attracted to, not a statement about what they think they're entitled to. Everyone accepts the best they can get. If attractive or successful men are available what is the problem with choosing them? Men also outearn women on average so naturally you will see that difference in income within relationships. I believe that this expectation that men should earn more is rooted in traditional cultures, where women are expected to be care-takers, while men are expected to use their natural advantage of strength and intelligence to provide and protect. There is some sense in it. And you can't blame women for having these ideals instilled in them from an early age. But I have seen many relationships where the woman is actually dating down. That is not unheard of, and you can find women that will date lower-income men if it brings you any relief.
There is flaw to both stereotypes when looking at people on a case-by-case basis. But these expectations are not stopping you from finding someone that's compatible with you. There are a lot of unconventional people out there. It will always be harder for unconventional people to find matches, but you have to get on with it and appreciate what you can get.
Both ugly men and women find love. But you need to accept that love is much like friendship, some people are just really bad at making friends. It's not the rest of the world's fault. It's not some flaw in the way god or biology designed relationships. It just is. Some people find love quite easily. I say the tradeoff is if something is rarer, you might appreciate it more. I'm finding the trend in my responses is advice to appreciate more. I feel that a lot of the hurt felt by comparing can be calmed by understanding that there are always pros and cons and tradeoffs. And happiness is quite relative. You complain that women won't love you, and that other men are getting it but you're not. First thing you can do is make the decision to stop comparing yourself to other men. Stop envying them. Stop thinking what they have that you lack is a reflection of your worth or a fundamental evil in society. Live in your surroundings, amongst the people in your vicinity, and do what you can with what you have and get on with it. It doesn't matter what you think the trend is among women, or whether you resent it. All you need is fortitude to try again in good faith. That's the only way to meet someone "off-trend".
It doesn't matter what you think the trend is, you could be wrong, you will probably be wrong, or you will find exceptions anyway.
I hope you do find a good partner. I hope everyone does, but it's unnecessary to make it a competition of who's most likely to get screwed. All you can do is the best. You won't always know how your partner will act down the line, it's RNG for everyone. Just be careful.
Everyone needs love, man. Everyone really really wants what you're talking about, and it's not sunshine and rainbows for the opposite sex.

Alternative_Room4999 · 2022-04-19T04:43:05+00:00

Yep I guess these are standard red/black talking points, I think you're preaching to the choir here. Any guy who has used a dating app has had to confront the reality that the birds and bees are not anywhere near equal. The average woman's quality of life is 10000% better than the average mans.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-04-19T03:36:56+00:00

This fucking incel post gets approved, but you fucking auto-filter my benign and funny posts? Wtf mods?

mandoa_sky · 2022-04-19T07:43:56+00:00

You can move to Texas, Florida and a few other places OP - abortion is banned there

ConfidentPain1834 · 2022-04-19T09:08:43+00:00

So many women today are BROKEN, at least partly because of this. Empty, soulless, loveless creatures roaming around destroying the lives of anyone who dares care about them. A man that acts like this will be told he has a personality disorder (narcissism). Meanwhile it's normalized or even encouraged for women

Give it time, though, things will change. A good start would be if people would STOP ENABLING this behavior (in women and men both). It is NOT human nature. It is NOT female nature

ConsultJimMoriarty · 2022-04-19T08:23:01+00:00

You say you're a woman, but if you are, I'll voluntarily watch the Kardashians.

chatterfly · 2022-04-19T09:32:40+00:00

This is a perfect example of how patriarchy hurts everyone. Gender roles/ Sex based behaviour expectations hurt literally everyone.

Not-Another-Jane-Doe · 2022-04-19T09:45:21+00:00

As long as I can safely do what I want and get what I wish for, I hope the same happens for everyone. But I can’t seemnto care further than that

Title	Dating, Marriage, and life is full of Female Privelege
Author	HateBeingAMan2
Upvotes	59
Comments	304
Date	April 19, 2022 2:57 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/u6uwpt/dating_marriage_and_life_is_full_of_female/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/dating-marriage-and-life-is-full-of-female.1112111 https://theredarchive.com/post/1112111

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