Guys who used to be rejected by women but worked on themselves and now are successful, do you feel little disgusted by the change in behaviour of women?

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-04-15T18:49:02+00:00

The ones who laugh at people that they think are beneath them? I have no interest in being with such a woman.

The ones that just weren't attracted to me because I didn't have my shit together? No hard feelings there. It's not like it was their job to fix me.

Kukantiz · 2022-04-15T18:42:44+00:00

No. I like this version of myself more than the old version. I'm thankful I leveled up.

Electric_kundalini · 2022-04-15T17:16:27+00:00

Not at all. Working on yourself is the highest form of self love.

kyrensolo · 2022-04-15T17:25:06+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Robofrogg1 · 2022-04-15T18:03:19+00:00

Hahaha no the only disgust I have is for how I used to behave in the past.

Canadian-Seductioner · 2022-04-15T17:18:03+00:00

Not at all lol just like we don't like uglies and fatties, they don't like losers and incels.

kettlebell_workout · 2022-04-15T17:16:27+00:00

At first, yes. I was disappointed in them. But then you realise that is a human nature to always want better.

johker · 2022-04-15T17:50:23+00:00

These day I don’t really give a crap what women think of me. I used to care so much but now I just have a strong, silent confidence about myself. The hard work, money, and accomplishments definitely helped me dgaf

2022-04-15T17:18:38+00:00

hell naw .. the breed of women that were rejecting me back then was when i was in high school but being grown and meeting a whole new breed of women that showed me love felt great ..

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-04-15T17:15:15+00:00

No, it's not their fault you were a wimp and a loser your whole life. The same way that if a fattie who no one paid attention to all of a sudden lost weight and glowed up shouldn't be feeling all butt hurt that men didn't like her before.

MihaiRau · 2022-04-15T19:01:54+00:00

No, because once I improved I realized that I was the problem and not them.

Spinuchi · 2022-04-15T18:44:43+00:00

No that’s weird bro.. self pity type shit.. just be proud of the fact you have improved

HyakuShichifukujin · 2022-04-15T19:07:19+00:00

No. Once you start being successful, you really don’t give a shit about things like this that don’t matter anymore.

If I don’t like a particular woman’s behaviour, I simply don’t associate with her, and that’s the end of that story or my thoughts about it.

Women as a whole will act the way they will act, you can take it or leave it.

FakeSafeWord · 2022-04-15T21:05:08+00:00

Got rejected by this girl I was obsessed with for months. She didn't just say no, she laughed at made me feel pathetic. It crushed me. Over the next year or so I got better in almost every way. Better job, Gym, tan, new clothes, fucked a bunch of women.

Ran into her while out one night with a hottie on my arm and it was obvious from first sight that she saw me differently and wanted my attention. When I didn't give it to her, she tried harder and then got mad and tried to insult me again. I just ignored it and she lost her shit and embarrassed herself in public, got thrown out of the bar trying to get dudes to fight me.

It felt great.

traybro · 2022-04-15T17:30:31+00:00

Are we guys not the same? Cmon man let’s have some self awareness

JK-Rofling · 2022-04-15T19:05:51+00:00

Nah I don’t think, it’s about maturing and figuring yourself out, self awareness goes a long way tbh.

DeJuanBallard · 2022-04-15T19:02:50+00:00

Yes, it's just as lonely as before , because I don't trust them.

nio5021 · 2022-04-15T18:36:14+00:00

Not at all. I feel like I've earned the privilege to date attractive woman by working on myself professionally and personally. It gives me a sense of pride and a sense of accomplishment that I didn't have before my self-improvement journey

Ribbet537 · 2022-04-15T18:47:29+00:00

Nope, but I was the overly nice guy so girls were friendly and never laughed at me

greedo80000 · 2022-04-15T18:55:23+00:00

No? Their behavior didn't change. You did.

Kronuk · 2022-04-15T18:37:12+00:00

If you work on yourself and become successful at women you will hopefully be past the anger phase. If women are still able to make you angry then you haven't worked on yourself enough.

VDKay · 2022-04-15T18:56:08+00:00

No not at all.

It is important to understand that women act mainly on emotion, and it is important to understand the emotions behind their actions. Once you do, everything makes sense: her actions then and her actions now.

We all have our emotional triggers. I, for example, am turned on by independent women. Maybe I'll reject a girl with dead-end finances or emotionally clingy. And I am OK with it. If she happens to come back a few years later with a career, her own place and a car, she will be way more appealing. Not only that, but also knowing where she came from and how much work she had put in is even more attractive!

2022-04-15T19:00:16+00:00

Nope, when you are in the right state of mind, you just don't mind. This is not the same for when you have money, if you happens to win the lottery, fuck those bitches, hehe

2022-04-15T19:01:13+00:00

Kinda, but I do the same thing so can't really blame them

smug_beatz · 2022-04-15T19:12:06+00:00

Yes I smell hypocrisy and double standards from afar whenever this happens.

BudgetInteraction811 · 2022-04-15T19:52:04+00:00

It would be pretty counterproductive if you become bitter and resentful, and I think it can only come from a place of mild entitlement. None of are entitled to the attraction of the opposite sex, even when we are at our personal best. You probably didn’t spend your ugly duckling phase feeling bad for fat and hideous women either, you just didn’t consider them attractive. It’s not your fault you wouldn’t date somebody you think is ugly, just like it’s not a woman’s fault she isn’t attracted to a shlub.

LZoSoFR · 2022-04-15T19:52:24+00:00

No. Having it easier with woman is a bonus for being a better and healthier person. I wouldn't date the old me either

parahacker · 2022-04-15T20:58:40+00:00

If it were just double-faced shallowness, I could deal.

What bothered me when I got older and more successful with women was the fact that so many of them were cheating on someone else. Or openly tossing aside men that were objectively good people and good partners. The sheer unreliability I encountered burned me out. Younger women, older women, pretty, ugly, everything in between, they used men like fashion wear. I eventually just... stopped. Sex was great and all, but when the trust is completely gone that can put a damper on the drive.

Rispy_Girl · 2022-04-15T19:24:53+00:00

You should also ask this on purple pill

nevertextgoodnight · 2022-04-15T19:38:31+00:00

No, because part of "working on myself" is realizing humans do human shit

Or specifically, women do women things

I can't get upset at feminine energy as I choose to interact with it

I think women are beautiful, and having been dragged through the mud allows me to appreciate the really good ones worth my time

It was never women that needed to change, it was always me

CigarFrog · 2022-04-15T19:49:02+00:00

Nah ... Men or Women are attracted to people who have their Shit together... Which unfortunately many times is defined by society! I can only speak for myself, but I don't recall a time I've EVER been attracted to a woman who looked like Dumpster Fire! - ZenMachine

Mr_ambitiouz · 2022-04-15T19:54:54+00:00

I just hate the fact that they didn't appreciate the Nice person that I was.

moleratical · 2022-04-15T21:12:04+00:00

Not at all. I figure women can do whatever they want for whatever reason they want as they all have agency. Furthermore, I don't project the actions of one individual onto an entire group.

Maybe the woman that previously rejected me had a boyfriend at the time, or just broke up and didn't want company, or was grieving the loss of her dog, or didn't want to be bothered by men that night, or thought I wasn't attractive, or thought I smelled funny, or thought I was attractive but that other guy over there is more attractive so she thought she'd go for him.

Well then, that's all totally valid reason for rejecting someone.

What kind of incel post is this OP?

2022-04-16T00:00:29+00:00

Lol why? Men are equally as shallow if not more. The minute you lose weight or learn how to do makeup their all over you. Unfortunately you gotta look good to get the attention of the opposite sex. No point of being bitter about it 😂

third-breakfast · 2022-04-16T00:19:59+00:00

Absolutely not. Women can’t be blamed for who they’re attracted to or what is considered to be attractive. Most of it is hard wired into them.

If you did so then good on you for improving your life and putting yourself in a position where you’re desirable.

Women in general aren’t shallow or two faced because you moved from unattractive to attractive.

Keep working on yourself and enjoy the attention.

reddit_boxing · 2022-04-15T17:15:24+00:00

Well yes but if we're to ring true, I would also be disgusted in myself by changing for them. It comes full circle

LandscapeClear1630 · 2022-04-15T18:47:34+00:00

Yep.

But it is what it is.

kanyesbathroommirror · 2022-04-15T19:17:50+00:00

One can have standards without being a shallow person.

Picture the least attractive woman you know and imagine her getting mad at you for rejecting her advances because all men are supposed to like sex. That's the energy this post gives off.

pdx4nhl · 2022-04-15T19:48:56+00:00

This is such a garbage view. Get over yourself and move on. You’re a better person now…stay that way without being a resentful dumbass.

aterrifyingfish · 2022-04-15T20:09:48+00:00

Like when you get attention from a woman do you have a thought that these kind of women used to ignore and laugh on me.

That's literal insanity. First off, women aren't a hive mind that all share thoughts about you. The women that are currently attracted to you are not the same people as the women that ignored and laughed at you in the past. What you said makes as much sense as hating a guy because he has red hair because a guy with red hair stole your lunch when you were in 6th grade. Secondly, you have preferences, so do women. If you don't meet those preferences, why would you be mad at the woman for having them. Do you think that women that you aren't attracted to should be mad at you for not being attracted to them? Probably not.Thirdly, calling someone shallow because they weren't attracted to you when you were unattractive is just... sad.Are you physically attracted to every woman in the world? Do you go on dates with women that you're not attracted to because you want to make the world more fair? Probably not. Why should women be expected to?I think you should probably examine why you've got these thoughts, work through them, and figure out why they're wrong and harmful.

ryux999 · 2022-04-15T19:08:44+00:00

nope

MeWuzBornIn1990 · 2022-04-15T19:09:36+00:00

Just be proud of where you are. Know that self-improvement is a never ending quest, so keep improving day by day. And learn and understand female nature.

Low_Fondant9911 · 2022-04-15T19:10:28+00:00

You need to become the man women want and that part of their nature doesn't require your acceptance or understanding. Same thing goes for women regarding desirable men. That "Its all about what's on the inside" is a bunch of disney bs. Keep increasing your value, my guy

2022-04-15T19:13:56+00:00

I’ve always heard it’s worse with women. Pretty privilege is definitely real for them.

2022-04-15T19:16:55+00:00

No I’m not feeling any type of way towards them because frankly I don’t want to date unattractive, unfit and broke women either.

Difficult_Ad_8299 · 2022-04-15T19:23:11+00:00

mrrooftops · 2022-04-15T19:31:36+00:00

Be disgusted with the person you were before and never go back there.

Queen_Aardvark · 2022-04-15T19:45:57+00:00

I'm disgusted by the lies and moralism.

cyrusol · 2022-04-15T19:52:03+00:00

People are born that way. You can't expect anyone to change that.

dcmathproof · 2022-04-15T19:57:04+00:00

Get enough work done on yourself and you won't bother to even think of it either way....

Allucardhelsing · 2022-04-15T20:04:52+00:00

Shallow and Double faced certainly isnt what i would say. What i find is, there is no such thing as unconditional love except the love you give yourself. When you think someone doesnt love the old you, you have to consider if the old you deserved that love.

There is a difference between love, affection, or compassion. These are just my ideas of what they mean. So no dictionary stuff.

Love from others comes from satisfying social requirements and fulfilling their emotional needs. That feeling of being vulnurable to someone and them back is only able to come about when u trust that person. So it is going to be hard to love people who don't deserve it.

Affection is something you find in friends. A sense of belonging and camradrie. Or at thr very least, acceptance. Its something we all seek in people we care about, but not evreyone has. It is hard to feel affection for a hateful person.

Compassion, is the universal empathy we have for living beings. It is free and can be given to all, even the most vile and toxic person.

The old you definitely deserved compassion. People should not rob you of human rights like agency, pursuit of happiness, or privacy.

Maybe you were deserving of affection. If you had friends, true friends, you can say you were a nice enough person that people wanted to be around you and give u their affection.

Love is the one that people obsess over. But it is risky. Its being vulnurable to getting hurt. Did people feel you were worthy of that trust? Probably not. Did you love yourself? Maybe , maybe not

I didnt love who i was. I couldnt even give myself affection and i refused my own compassion. I felt i deserved to suffer. It was only when i showed myself compassion and worked on myself did i start to earn my own affection and finally love. So was I shallow or double faced to myself? No. I simply was not worthy of it. I had the potential and i squandered it. But compassion, that is free. And that is what everyone deserves. Not love.

ruffyamaharyder · 2022-04-15T20:21:16+00:00

Yes, but it doesn't matter because I'm not keeping them.

kyle_fall · 2022-04-15T20:31:11+00:00

Sometimes. But then you think it over and it makes perfect sense. What's unique about you before you put a lot of work into yourself? Your unique style of self-deprecating humor? Your League of Legends skin collection?

Then you learn a bit about biology and how natural selection works and you put together that not only does a female not have use for a low-value male but that male is also probably toxic and dangerous to her!

Only after you put a shit load of thought and effort into your life, skills and lifestyle do you really have value to offer to any human being; girls being one of them.

If anything it's a great service that girls do you by ignoring you when you do nothing, if they didn't what would stop us from smoking weed all day, playing video games, and still landing the girl of your dream?

DrixlRey · 2022-04-15T21:02:02+00:00

Nope. Face it, you change your behavior depending on the women too. Should you feel ashamed of that?

2022-04-15T21:06:22+00:00

Dudes treat hot girls vs ugly girls way different too. You bet your ass if a fat girl lost weight and became super hot, guys would suddenly treat her like royalty.

hobomojo · 2022-04-15T21:14:28+00:00

No, because that’s just human nature. I like penguins but I don’t call a sea lion evil when it eats them, it’s just in its nature to do that. Women are more attracted to men who can provide (have their shit together) and are physically in shape as that provides a better chance that their potential child will be better off for it. Better just to accept the animal nature in all of us and adapt with it than to rail against evolution and go extinct.

burncushlikewood · 2022-04-15T21:31:03+00:00

No I think women actually are pretty decent as most humans are, if she's rejecting me she has a good reason, I've improved my game significantly by just practicing and reading, it's not her fault that my game used to be bad

Muramasaika · 2022-04-15T21:41:48+00:00

Not at all. The woman I will love deserves the best version of myself i can become, the pathetic mess I was two years ago didn't deserve any attention because I didn't love myself.

ThatGuy_Nick9 · 2022-04-15T21:44:51+00:00

If you feel anger towards anyone who’s just living their life, you need therapy bud

2022-04-15T21:46:34+00:00

No..

I think its a blessing in disguise. All my past rejections have made me a better version of myself. And I am enjoying the self-growth as a man more than the sex.

TryingToForgetPi · 2022-04-15T21:47:08+00:00

Why would you be disgusted that a woman is interested in the parts of you that you're able to change?

Wouldn't it be more frustrating if she was only interested in you because of something you had no control over?

pepepoopoo567890 · 2022-04-15T21:49:51+00:00

No. You today are a better product than the loser you for yesterday. It's not wrong or weird for them to want you now since you're better. Ignoring is ok, I've never been laughed at so maybe that's different.

Thierr · 2022-04-15T21:57:39+00:00

nope

2022-04-15T22:05:06+00:00

I had a ahah instantly at the end

SlugTheToad · 2022-04-15T22:19:48+00:00

Do you find them shallow and double faced?

Partially. There are shallow and cruel women, who don't care about you truly, only about shallow outer things. If you have these shallow "shell" elements from the getgo you might not even realize how some women might treat you for who you are inside. And even if you are lame from outside, it might be true to your inner skills/values/ideas too, maybe you WERE lame not just in outer things, maybe cruel women laughed at you inner shortcomings too (e.g. thinking as a manchild, you should work on that, even if someone laughs at you cruelly about it). BUT, women, or more like humans in general come in a big variety. So hating them all because you think they are all double faced is stupid. Because women who were kind, clever or just bluntly true during rejection helped me in becoming a better social creature as a whole, which makes me not get disgusted by having more positive outcomes during social interactions with women.

BreakTheWallsDown95 · 2022-04-15T22:44:01+00:00

It's sent me into an absolute state of depression.

No woman I meet is memorable, (compare to the one-i-tis I once idealized) and I often feel like my value as a human being correlates to how I look.

We are not even talking about romantic attraction, but just people's overall attentiveness and treatment of me.

ofwgktathrow · 2022-04-15T22:46:08+00:00

No effect. Live life without disdain and judgment, it’s better that way.

TanSuperman · 2022-04-15T23:04:19+00:00

Most women don’t laugh at you, they just don’t want to be with you. Those who use to laugh at me, they just aren’t in my field of anymore, as you develop as a person you realize they don’t matter. Those who genuinely were unkind suck, but part of becoming a valuable person in the eyes of a woman is that you no longer are held back by others opinions.

perern · 2022-04-15T23:07:24+00:00

I have changed by working on myself and my values.

The women I wanted earlier, I don't want them anymore so I don't care what they think of me. I'm feeling very good these days😁 Dating someone who likes me for who I am and have the same view on life as myself.

Arcchimedes · 2022-04-15T23:12:29+00:00

Not the attention, but the letting me fuck them with no effort part. Like damn girl all I had to do was talk some shit. You lose respect based on prior struggles, but try to just appreciate how far you’ve come. (It’s you being hot not them being slutty)

nk9axYuvoxaNVzDbtFhx · 2022-04-15T23:15:26+00:00

I remember watching a YouTube video where the guy would try to get a date with a girl and was rejected. He would leave and then drive up in his awesome car. He would then try to get a date and she would accept. He then opened his trunk and gave her a golden shovel and drove off.

Perfect_Brain_7964 · 2022-04-15T23:19:44+00:00

yes yea yea yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes god did i says yes?

fr tho. yes. i hate it it turns me off not being rejected sometimes in a weird way

itsyosariansnamesir · 2022-04-15T23:25:49+00:00

No! Everyone wants to be with someone who inspires them. Blaming the other is an excuse. Working on yourself and being the best you can be is life itself

jessiepc145 · 2022-04-15T23:38:37+00:00

Hitting it and never talking to them again makes me feel better

tropicsGold · 2022-04-15T23:39:24+00:00

I have never understood the whole concept behind being angry at women who not attracted to a guy. Why would that EVER be a thing? If there is any fault involved it is the guy for being weak.

OMGits_Su · 2022-04-16T00:12:13+00:00

I mean if you really worked on yourself, then their change of behaviour should not be a surprise or something to be disgusted about

ecish · 2022-04-16T00:17:13+00:00

Nah, i wouldn’t want to have dated me when I was younger either. I was a piece of shit.

Now that I’m clean off drugs and improving myself, it’s become a lot easier to find people who aren’t also pieces of shit. I feel better about myself and I think it shows when I talk to women now

Scorpio_Kiev · 2022-04-16T00:25:55+00:00

Imagine an obese girl you had no interest loses weight and is all of a sudden banging hot. Do you think she should be disgusted by your interest in her?

kphoenix137 · 2022-04-16T00:28:38+00:00

Yes, but that's just the way it is. No point in being salty about it. Just don't give them your seed or a ring

Joe_Doblow · 2022-04-16T00:33:59+00:00

You react to people romantically based on what you like. If you used to be unlikeable and became likeable in the general sense then what do you want people to do?

This goes for men and women or even organization. Imagine a dirty restaurant with a shitty manager and menu. You never go there. Then they get a new manager new menu new cooks and clean up the place so now you decide to eat there. Why would that behavior from the customer be disgusting. That’s reasonable

LevelUp84 · 2022-04-16T00:36:15+00:00

Nah, because I want the girl with big tits and a fat ass.

ld20r · 2022-04-16T10:16:32+00:00

I’ll let you in on a secret. You don’t need to “work on yourself” for the right woman.

Not everybody is going to like you and that is fully out of your control. All you can do is focus on those who do while continuing to move forward and not giving up but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go on a seemingly never ending journey of self improvement to impress someone.

If they are meant for you, then they will also be impressed by you and you won’t need to prove anything.

RStonePT · 2022-04-17T02:02:44+00:00

No. This is likely because a guy thinks it's him tricking people, and hasn't internalized his new value.

And if the girl falls for it, she must be stupid. How does she not know he's still the same unattractive dude?

So yeah, his problem isn't that girls changed behaviour, it's that he changed and doesn't believe that 'be yourself' can be better than 'used to be yourself'

Title	Guys who used to be rejected by women but worked on themselves and now are successful, do you feel little disgusted by the change in behaviour of women?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	255
Comments	131
Date	April 15, 2022 5:12 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/u4ctsy/guys_who_used_to_be_rejected_by_women_but_worked/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/guys-who-used-to-be-rejected-by-women-but-worked.1262003 https://theredarchive.com/post/1262003

Comments