I’m not saying that you should settle for a partner who isn’t attracted to you. But I’ve seen a lot of guys here—naturally virgins or other less-experienced men—try to poke holes at the idea of a woman being attracted enough to have sex with them by gauging how much “visceral” attraction there is. Even when women talk about how attractive they find their partners, some people here take it as an invitation to ask gotcha questions to prove the relationship doesn’t meet some unspoken threshold of primal attraction. How does this line of thinking help anyone?

Fact is that in real life, even when there’s attraction at first sight, few people are going to feel it with the animalistic intensity that porn and cologne commercials make you think is commonplace. They’ll flirt, they’ll dance, they’ll do whatever’s appropriate for the environment they’re in. They may even have sex on the first date. But few people are going to be so incapable of helping themselves that they rip each other’s clothes off and fuck then and there. And that’s okay.

So if you’re the type of person seeking “visceral” lust, you’re just setting yourself up for failure. When you luck into a situation where a naked and willing woman is across from you, you’re going to be fighting self-consciousness and the standards that grass-avoidant redditors are setting for themselves, missing out on god knows how many opportunities for a satisfying sex life. 98% of the population who have sex just call the sex a win with no conditions. Be like them. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.