Do any of the pills apply to polyamorous/nonmonogamous people?

Fit-Faithlessness149 · 2022-03-08T20:47:19+00:00

The red pill has a lot to say about poly. Red pill comments predict that poly will become more prevalent as women are mostly only hungry for top tier males. This will leave a lot of women with below average looks and a huge majority of males still wanting sex. Thus 8, 9 and 10 males will have multiple partners (face it they already do) with women that are 5 and up. And the remaining men will share below average women.

Tricky_Dog1465 · 2022-03-08T20:02:41+00:00

Honestly, I don't see where any of the pills fit into real life. They are what they are typed, and on social media, but in the real world?

That seems to be the issue at hand in general. Too many people need to get the heck off social media and go out and actually live.

LateralThinker13 · 2022-03-08T22:12:26+00:00

The Red pill is NOT advice, it is truths about existence.

If I tell you that women are hypergamous, that's RP truth. it doesn't tell you what to DO about it because RP is amoral. It doesn't advocate behavior. Oh sure, in light of various RP truths some courses of action are strongly recommended by its adherents, but they aren't RP themselves - they're RP-derived or inspired actions. It's a small difference but an important one.

So that said, yes, there can be and are RP people who are poly. My wife and I are. More than one successful writer I know is. Having RP knowledge in fact helps, because it gives you the tools to avoid unhealthy people for relationships, and wisdom regarding how to manage your partner(s). Without it, good luck passing the shit tests of one woman, let alone two.

Gigamon2014 · 2022-03-08T19:51:07+00:00

Kinda.

Tbh though I was more in kink and swinging...but HOLY HELL, the most redpilled community imaginable.

I personally think polyamory is for deluded swingers who still haven't gotten the memo or hippies who are into communal living. I came across many and I can only think of one woman in a couple who gave me a vibe a legit polyamorist. She was French though and I find the sexual mores of their culture are far more accomodating of extramarital relationships. I met her in a club and she was one of the few I didn't end up fucking within a few minutes of talking (which lended to her credibility...that environment did kinds open my eyes to how alcohol can really reveal women's nature, but maybe that's confirmation bias) and she said her husband and her had been doing it for twenty years. Swinging though is majorly redpill.

And anyone trying to argue is a fucking asshole. Because they're deliberately deceiving you. Especially because cuckolding and "hotwifing" is a massive part of the entire scene. One of the most popular in fact. I would say in frequency, the second most popular events and communities I participated in and attended were those that catered towards couples looking for a plus one to "spice up" their relationship. In many, many cases the couples who actually serious were those who were heavily invested in finding a guy who either had a big dick, was "gymfit"/hot or was black. There was definitely an AFBB thing and its crazy hearing women on here tell me it's a fallacy when I had sooo so many women complain about how events/clubs/sites were full of old fat man and it made finding suitable couples a nightmare, especially if they were bisexual (which many woman on the scene are). Don't let anyone lie and tell you otherwise. It's actually one of the last real sexual taboos out there so people don't like discussing it but i literally lived that community for years.

baresquad · 2022-03-08T17:21:45+00:00

No. Personally, I don’t think pills even apply to standard traditional relationships. So to me, they definitely don’t apply to poly or non-monogamous crowd

I’m ethically non-monogamous and I don’t ever experience anything this sub is talking about in real life. My dating life is perfect to me. I feel freer and happier than a lot of people

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2022-03-08T17:41:01+00:00

My poly friend was saying how they wanted to get through things with their other romantic interest but their current partner was melting down with it and they just couldn't deal with it.

I just said welcome to polyamory where everyone has feelings and you have to deal with all of them.

It's fundamentally different for poly people.

Vtridolla · 2022-03-08T17:17:22+00:00

Not that I’ve seen, they also do not apply to the LBGTQ+ community.

hearyoume14 · 2022-03-08T18:14:50+00:00

Maybe. There are sex differences,the fact dating is so hard supports this, that are both biological and environmental in nature. It depends on the individuals involved.

Ideally those in such a relationship would have good communication skills and strong sense of self. Though as many train wrecks as I’ve seen that is not always the case.

I’ve also seen non monogamous where a male partner doesn’t get as much attention as a female partner. Swingers and similar types talk about this often.Many have said the male/female ratio is skewed. Especially if you are singe poly/ single non- monogamous.

miminothing · 2022-03-08T21:29:55+00:00

Non monogamous people are probably more likely to be interested in sex politics… which means they’re probably more likely to end up here.

LowCreddit · 2022-03-09T02:47:44+00:00

TRP is poly. That's what plating is. It's a soft harem. I have even spent time in a male harem for a rich woman and TRP applies there too.

Female_urinary_maze · 2022-03-09T09:14:21+00:00

No, not really.

All the "pill" strategies tend to be built around the social scripts and normative behaviours of people who are monogamous and heterosexual. (or a misunderstanding of said scripts/behaviors)

Polyamourous relationships go off script by default. That's why poly people spend so much time talking things out and setting our own expectations in each relationship. We have to.

We've strayed far enough away from societaly defined norms and expectations in relationships that the only option is to make everything up ourselves.

Gender can still factor into poly relationships and dynamics, but it can't put the people into two defined roles in each relationship like it can for mono couples.

A lot of us are also queer so that's part of it too. I've never even met a polycule that consisted entirely of straight people. (queer relationships are even further off script for obvious reasons)

Anyway the fact that we're untethered from normative expectations is either the best thing about polyamoury or the worst thing depending on who you are and what you want.

If you want to use predefined strategies like what the "pills" suggest polyamoury isn't for you, but if you enjoy being able to build something from scratch (and have the communication skills to actually do it) it could work well for you.

rosephase · 2022-03-08T17:27:37+00:00

I'm polyamorous. TRP ideology and FDS ideology become even more transparently incorrect and harmful to the people who believe them. Because no matter how dumb they are about monogamy, they are even more nonsensical about non monogamy.

Yes, often poly men have a harder time finding people to fuck using OLD then women. It is much easier to find abundant low quality cock as a woman poly or mono. But I have three male partners and they all have more then one female partner. It takes me years and years to find someone I'm attracted to and compatible with, my male partners have a lot more "success" in dating then I do because I don't actively look for more partners.

Gigamon2014 · 2022-03-08T17:19:50+00:00

Nah. Polyamorous people are usually fat, ugly and extremely promiscuous. They’re existing in a different plane than us normies.

Crushed_95 · 2022-03-08T18:22:16+00:00

Of course the men have a way harder tie in poly relationships than women but, poly men still different vajayjay every once in a while and consider that a success.

w8juicelesspopsicle · 2022-03-09T01:36:41+00:00

Totally yes with cis het straight white men in poly (“poly”) nme dynamics for sure. Bonus points if 1) in grad school; 2) works in tech; 3) been in a marriage for 5+ years

DaphneDK42 · 2022-03-09T03:48:35+00:00

Its part of the red pill Enjoy the Decline. Nonmonogamous/polyamorous are steps you can enjoy on your path descending into the abyss.

2022-03-09T05:11:47+00:00

Yes it applies to those most because the whole dynamic that gave birth to these ”pills” is that marriage has been devalued.

2022-03-09T18:17:08+00:00

Tbh most "poly" couples are both below average, they are "geeks" who like star wars, and the girl pushes the poly thing so she can be with other guys and the boyfriend agrees cuz hes a beta and knows shes all he has.

Literally all the "poly" couples i see on dating apps lol

EugeneCezanne · 2022-03-08T20:48:32+00:00

Generally speaking, no. Most of the stuff I read here falls under "straight, mono people problems."

lingualistic · 2022-03-08T18:42:44+00:00

All the poly people I’ve known were emotionally damaged from childhood trauma. So there’s that.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-03-08T17:22:13+00:00

My wife and I are non-monogamous, I can fuck other women, she is bisexual and can also fuck other women , no other dudes ( and people always get in a hissy fit when I talk about this, no I'm not going to explain why there is a "no other men" policy when it comes to my wife, you'll just have to figure it out for yourself) who are cool with the terms and it works for us

How different is dating being nonmonogamous/polyamorous?

It's great, we have little rules but overall, I enjoy the connection and love and intimacy that I have with my wife but I don't have to just suppress my physical attraction to other women it's nice knowing that there's occasions where it's cool for me to act on it and not have to lie and sneak around like a cheater would.

Do any of the pills apply to being polyamorous/nonmonogamous?

To be honest I'm not into the pill thing in terms of labeling myself one, I get the general premise of most of them but it can get into pretty cringe territory lol only pill I take on a regular basis are my multivitamins

2022-03-08T21:58:48+00:00

Tradition Monogamous (unicorns) women are almost exstict in the West. So we are moving into some kind of polly. Spin plates is polly. Having multiple baby mommas is polly. The issue that Red sees with polly is our gelously instincts that are a feature, not a defect these effect cohabitation and inturn our children's up bridging.

Pilling_it · 2022-03-08T17:48:06+00:00

Basic knowledge of the pills can be distilled into any relationship because it's common sense.

The pills themselves, or rather how the loudest talking about it are enough removed from reality to not be able to be applied at all, if you ask me.

sarkington · 2022-03-08T17:27:49+00:00

They don’t care if a man is getting sex, only if he isn’t

tired_hillbilly · 2022-03-08T18:09:03+00:00

RP does. The guy who needs RP's advice isn't going to find out he's polyamorous. Like, how can you know you'd like to date multiple women when you can't even get one?

Kilatypus · 2022-03-08T18:10:36+00:00

I can't say much about it, what I do know is that RP communities highly advise for guys to never open the relationship, unless it's only on the man's side while the girl remains monogamous. They advise this because it is rare that, in an open/polyamorous relationship, the man finds a secondary, and extremely easy for the woman to have a secondary or more. It also increases the likelihood that she will find someone she prefers to be with more than you.

2022-03-09T02:36:08+00:00

Not sure how it fits though I think the guy I'm seeing is poly but not the "looking for a fuck" type or a Unicorn Hunter, something I heard him say about relationships tipped me off and so I feel at ease with him.

SuspiciousRule · 2022-03-08T19:59:15+00:00

Muslim community do polymorous relationships all the time I don't see anything wrong with if since it has work for them.

wtknight · 2022-03-08T17:56:15+00:00

The pills apply to everyone because they describe human nature.

AutoModerator · 2022-03-08T17:04:05+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

AutoModerator · 2022-03-08T22:22:03+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Drive-By-Cuckers · 2022-03-09T14:54:57+00:00

Idk I haven’t tried to actually date anyone in a while I was in a ltr that became a ldr due to college. I’ve been single for like 4 months now and tbh it’s pretty enjoyable, I have sex just as often as I did when when I was with my ex before long distance.

There’s definitely like an aspect to being alone that is hard and it’s that I don’t feel like there’s anyone in my life who is like required to listen to me complain when I had a rough day. At the same time I’ve gotten a lot closer with a lot of different people and kinda have a couple less close relationships with varying degrees of intimacy.

I guess that’s not really polyamory though because I’m not really like committed to anyone or in love with anyone. I think that I probably receive less random attention than women I sleep with. Idk, who cares how many dms a woman gets from randos tho if she’s hitting you up on the weekend to hang out? Clearly that makes you the one she wants

HinduProphet · 2022-03-10T04:14:36+00:00

Polyamory is just Polygamy in most cases.

One woman multiple men are very rare, it's mostly one man paired up with two bisexual women.

YetAnotherCommenter · 2022-03-10T05:17:56+00:00

I think that poly/nonmongamous people are real but somewhat rare. Or at least that seems to be the case. Lots of people of both sexes seem to fetishize monogamy.

In the case of genuine poly/non-monogamous people they're outliers whom are not correctly described by the pill theories.

I think a lot of the skepticism about poly/non-monogamy in the RP space comes from the possibility of certain non-poly women pretending to be poly as a way to engage in completely open AF/BB behavior (thus exploiting the Beta).

IcarusKiki · 2022-03-10T22:57:53+00:00

Polyamory is a niche hipster nerd thing and isn’t mainstream enough to be talked about in the pill sense. Note that “polyamory” has different connotations than “polygamy” and “nonmonogamy”.

“Polyamory” typically is lib-left hipsters and more female centered and from what I’ve seen typically ends in drama and jealousy.

“Nonmonogamy” is usually just a couple where one wants to cheat or is bored and the other c#pes

marshmallowmeringue · 2022-03-12T19:01:38+00:00

Polyam and happily married for 14 years here. I think RP could apply to straight people in the ENM community. It doesn’t personally for my situation wherein my husband and I, and both of our partners are bisexual. My husband is the only male I am interested in. He has had a couple of casual situations with women but he predominantly dates other men outside of our marriage. Dealing with multiple egos and sets of feelings takes sophisticated communication and empathy skills. I can’t imagine a situation within ENM that would flourish if anyone’s motivations were reduced to their gender, because dismissing someone’s feelings is the fastest way to the doghouse. I can only speak for myself and my own experience. I consider myself moderate and absolutely accept inherent differences between the sexes. But when you’re functioning within an unconventional relationship structure, unconventional approaches apply.

Title	Do any of the pills apply to polyamorous/nonmonogamous people?
Author	platitudesaplenty
Upvotes	38
Comments	223
Date	March 8, 2022 5:04 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/t9lg5i/do_any_of_the_pills_apply_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-any-of-the-pills-apply-to.1106120 https://theredarchive.com/post/1106120

Comments