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xfelugirlx
[–]adeecomeforthFDS Newbie 1074 points1075 points1076 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Good, I wish more people would be ashamed of their sons and help their daughter in law out, instead of blaming the ex wife or pleading with her to take their crusty son back.
[–]kungfucasserole 72 points73 points74 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Literally this. I wasn't married, but I once broke up with an ex (same one that I spoke about in a prior post who showed up at my house at 5 am and jumped in my car). Anyway, his mom showed up at my place of work begging me to get back together with her son, because he is "so sad" and she wants him to "go back to normal." Maybe you should consider getting him into therapy? Make him do some emotional labor instead of putting the burden on me to fix him? C'mon lady...
[–]dingopaintFDS Newbie 298 points299 points300 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Marriage is supposed to be a union of families. If more in-laws viewed each other as REAL family members, this would be the natural approach.
[–]dragoness_leclerq 50 points51 points52 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wish more people would be ashamed of their sons and help their daughter in law out,
My paternal grandma only started to see the truth about her son when she (and my aunt) threw my mom a graduation party to celebrate getting her Master's and my dad was too busy getting high somewhere to show up. She didn't like my mom but 100% felt putting on a big party showcasing her son's wife's success would impress our community and put him in a favorable light.
Now my grandma still coddled and infantilized my dad for several years but it was on that day I saw her face drop in shame for the first time and witnessed the façade cracking.
[–]thefutureisXX 41 points42 points43 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My husband told his parents we were getting a divorce and that it was his fault. At first, they said, "well, thefutureisXX had her issues!" My "issues" were being ignored and neglected by their son and not pulling his weight. It caused a lot of depression. Then when he made it clear(ish) that it was his fault and not mine...His mom (not knowing I was there) replied, "well you'll always be my sweet baby boy." And then smiled sweetly at him.
His sister said she was so sorry that happened to me. But instead of telling off her brother said she'd always be there for him. I was expecting his family to "take my side" or at least tell him off. But they did neither. So neutral about the entire thing. I'd scold TF out of my kid. I deleted them off Insta and quickly deactivated my account and I have a foreign number so no calling. I can just disappear into the background and lay low for a few months. LOVE it! I took the "delete and delete" method. Double protection!
[–]myheartisfullofloveFDS Newbie 590 points591 points592 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Now this is what I like to see. Sick and fucking tired of men ruining women's lives by impregnating them and leaving them at their most vulnerable and disserting the poor baby behind. It takes a village to raise a child, not just one struggling mother.
Society shames us so hard into becoming mothers and then once we do become moms, we are pushed out into the cold and tell us to deal with it on our own. Fuck that and fuck that man.
Bravo to the parents! They will make amazing grandparents to the baby!
[–]dingopaintFDS Newbie 206 points207 points208 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
And all single mothers are shortsighted immoral sluts, whereas single fathers are tRyInG tHeIr bEsT.
[–]jijitsu-princessFDS Newbie 57 points58 points59 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
Yup. I see it all the damn time. I’m a single mom, widowed. Run a business, work part time and train. No one pats me on the back. But as for the men who are single parents? All the sudden it’s this life changing trauma that we must lift them up and support them.
[–]The_Cat_EmpressFDS Newbie 28 points29 points30 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
EXACTLY!
Men and women...want sex and intimacy...Women have sex = child. (when men are the CAUSE for all unwanted pregnancies because they can't do without their precious orgasm)
Burn her at the stake!
[–]thefutureisXX 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Right? It's nuts. My ex has never paid child support and became shittier the older we got. He still lived with his dad. Like, he relied on his dad while simultaneously getting mad that I needed help financially raising a child. He's in his 30s. Protect your fucking womb.
[–]scorchedsouIFDS Newbie 68 points69 points70 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
We're all so isolated. There is no precedent of single mothers bonding with each other to help each other/raise their children together, even if it'd make things much easier. This isn't the kind of family society wants to see.
[–]DreamlikeNile 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Interestingly, I read about certain times in the past when men that treated women badly were much more shamed for their behavior. Actions like this are how we bring about change.
[–]millennialpink2000FDS Apprentice 558 points559 points560 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
WOW, some actually decent parenting!! WHAT A SHOCK
It's nice seeing people with integrity. Too bad their son didn't inherit it.
[–]vforvendetta87FDS Newbie 452 points453 points454 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
FINALLY someone not coddling their adult son.
[–]xfelugirlxFDS Newbie[S] 194 points195 points196 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It looks like a miracle
[–]mandoa_skyFDS Disciple 187 points188 points189 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
geez the attitude of the rest of their family - since when is a grandchild (and by extension the mother of the said grandchild) not a member of the family?
[–]millennialpink2000FDS Apprentice 115 points116 points117 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My grandparents didn't consider my mom family even though she was married to dad for nearly 40 years and had all of his kids (and their only grandkids). They didn't think we were family either. It's truly amazing these people exist
[–]LadyWizzardFDS Newbie 54 points55 points56 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's the remnant of the belief that the man is the seed and the woman is the dirt and as such she contributes nothing to the child because it's all father's genes creating it.
[–]dragon_wolf4FDS Newbie 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My father & father's parents & siblings have never considered my mom or me their family (they are all toxic abusives poses to us anyways). They got their son's marriage done so they can save their face in front of society, and not be seen as greedy people who only produced a son to use as their personal slave and atm (they totally are doing this, but don't want other people of think them like that).
[–]lolmemberberriesFDS Newbie 390 points391 points392 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wish more parents held their shitty sons accountable. This warms my heart.
[–]Geocities_SEO_ExpertFDS STRATEGY COACH 267 points268 points269 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I understand sticking by your family, because your family should always be there for you, but shitty men like this aren't ever family. They won't be there for you, quite the opposite. They are opportunists and predators, letting them loiter around your family is a disaster waiting to happen. This won't be the last shitty, dishonest thing he does in life.
[–]AnniaTFDS Disciple 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. Such selfish man won't be there to support their parents when they get old or sick, so why treat him like family? I'm sure his parents still love him as parent love is usually unconditional, but they did the right thing by standing by their former daughter in law and grandchildren who are also family and will probably be there for them when they need.
[–]millennialpink2000FDS Apprentice 86 points87 points88 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
100%. I wouldn't trust this guy even if he were my kid, he clearly has no integrity or loyalty
[–]softensonicFDS Newbie 30 points31 points32 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Right... this is the type of guy that'd probably abandon his parents in old age.
[–]CusterHadItComingFDS Newbie 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. There are so many women who end up doing the actual hard work of taking care of their in-laws in old age, while their husbands just stand around talking about how they’re taking care of mom or dad.
Edited for grammar.
[–]oscine23FDS Newbie 138 points139 points140 points 4 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
I bet side chick ain’t looking so new and shiny now. Done fumbled the bag. Bwahhh
[–]thefutureisXX 28 points29 points30 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Right? He left his wife and baby homeless. Did he just think he'd be like "yo mom and dad! so that will is still good right?! Me and my new gf wanna vacation and buy a place. The divorce was super rough and I need some help financially" Fucking delusional.
*wife rolls her eyes at him while making the baby's bottle in his parents' kitchen 10 ft away* lol
[–]whitefox00FDS Newbie 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
It happens though. My ex left the kids and I for his mistress. Apparently he immediately introduced the side chick to his family and they were FINE with it. They said all that mattered was that “he was happy”. At almost 40 years old he moved back in with his Mom. His family has fully supported him leaving us behind and have offered 0 support to me or the kids. Yet they are 100% enabling and supporting him. It baffles me.
[–]daisy_0720FDS STRATEGY COACH 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I almost downvoted this on instinct.
[–]whitefox00FDS Newbie 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ha! Understandable, it’s a shitty story. I share it in hopes I can help other women.
[–]oscine23FDS Newbie 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
I’m so sorry. That must be so hard on you guys. How could anyone do that, especially to their children? The parents in the OP are actually the anomaly, I think. Most parents are in that ‘whatever makes u happy’ shit.
Your ex has a boatload of karma coming his way.
[–]whitefox00FDS Newbie 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Funny you should say that, he got badly injured shortly after leaving us. He was showing off for the new girlfriend and it went badly. Now he has to attend physical therapy and the girlfriend gets to be his nurse. There are downsides-he can’t work so he’s paying 0 child support and he’s using the injury as an excuse to not see the kids, AT ALL.
Thank you for your kind words. I think there’s been way too much focus put on men “being happy”. It seems like 100 years ago men were expected to handle their responsibilities, and they were made to understand life isn’t always happy & easy. In my opinion, women understand that but men don’t. Women are also still expected to put in the effort and make things work no matter what-while men can & do leave. What do you think?
[–]oscine23FDS Newbie 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I absolutely agree. We are the strong ones. We need to normalize women leaving more often, and not a decade into a shitty relationship/marriage.
[–]miloba_FDS Newbie 129 points130 points131 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So thankful parents like this exist. Way to hold the son accountable. I’m glad his wife and child will have the full love and support of the grandparents.
That said, I’m saddened for the wife and child, and I despise seeing yet another family broken by infidelity.
[–]DivineGoddess1111111FDS Newbie 146 points147 points148 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
My inlaws were awful. My ex husband cheated and got her pregnant and left us with a ton of debt he refused to pay his share of.
His family totally wrote me and our kids off. The kids didn't even hear from them for years. They took my shitty cheating ex and his baby mamas side in every way. This despite the exact same scenario happened to my mother in law, when my father in law left her for another woman.
If more in laws were like the couple in this post, the world would be a better place.
[–]whitefox00FDS Newbie 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sorry that happened to you, it also happened to me. What is with these families enabling these men to abandon their wives/kids?! I’m going to laugh when he abandons them one day, probably when they’re sick and need help.
[–]JaelismyhomegirlFDS Newbie 87 points88 points89 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is good to see ❤️
[–]aquietswordFDS Newbie 82 points83 points84 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nice to see but damn I'd hate to be a parent like this with a son like that. Feels like even good parents can't battle society's insistence of allowing dickheads all the audacity.
[–]Mimosa_usagiFDS Newbie 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's amazing how some people are so good and have such strong character and their children can still grow up to be trashy or monsters.
[–]Keepers12345FDS Newbie 75 points76 points77 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Appropriate, immediate, and severe consequences that are proportional to one's behavior aren't punishment - I hope that she and her husband continue being the light and strength that this woman and her child need to get through these years and beyond.
[–]ohmiraFDS Apprentice 67 points68 points69 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
God bless these parents. This is the most they can do to heal their son, anyway.
[–]Designer-SkyFDS Newbie 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My fucking husband cheated on me when I was 6 months postpartum and going through a cancer scare. He was also physically violent. His cheating was exposed and instead of taking responsibility he killed himself and his parents walked away from me and my son (their grandson!) completely. Literally, they moved across the country and I haven’t spoken to them in years now.
This story makes me cry. I have so many feelings for that vulnerable new mom. I am so happy to see that his family stepped up for her. That shit coming from everyone else must really hurt though.
[–]Bella_Keira23FDS Newbie 58 points59 points60 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is one of the few times I can say without sarcasm that I’m actually shocked! And very glad to see a woman taking care of the woman her NV son walked all over. I’m actually surprised. Well done, sis!
[–]shutup201FDS Newbie 56 points57 points58 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
How refreshing! Parents not coddling rotten kids.
[–]xfelugirlxFDS Newbie[S] 37 points38 points39 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Male ones, they are a lot that just blame girls for everything but if the boys do the same they just cover up
[–]shutup201FDS Newbie 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So true!
[–]Elena1684 15 points16 points17 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My new female boss did this to her son. Same scenario, DIL pregnant he cheated and then soon after it all blew up he died in a car accident. It took my boss 10 years to recover but I’m proud of how she handled it.
[–]modernmedusaaRuthless Strategist 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Karma in action
[–]and_here_i_beFDS Newbie 106 points107 points108 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Normalize cutting out toxic family members, even if they're your own son. Not that blood relations should matter when it comes to choosing family but the daughter-in-law and the grandchild ARE FAMILY! The grandchild is literally blood-related so by extension, DIL is too. Do the family members expect to just leave the grandchild hanging? What kind of logic is that?
[–]AnExpensiveDesire 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The ex-husband's parents are people of the highest possible honor and ethics. I wish I could reach out to them directly to let them know that and to tell them that the family members criticizing them are contemptible. That's far too mild a word to use, but I don't know what else to call them. The parents are taking responsibility for the monstrous actions of their son. I wish I could let them know that they should be proud beyond words of what they are doing. People of principle like that are very rare in today's world. They are invaluable. Instead of criticizing them, the extended family should be commending them in the highest possible terms and holding them up as an example for all the children in the family to follow.
Losing their son is no loss. He doesn't deserve them.
[–]MinMiddleEast 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is why I never wanted children. These two sound like decent people, and look at what their son turned out to be.
Happy to see them standing their ground, though. We need to see more of this in the world.
[–]avamansouri 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Why did this bring tears to my eyes omg
Just knowing how cruel men's families can be to daughter-in-laws and how unfair the circumstances truly are for women, it's so easy to see this going a completely different way. Like it's almost unbelievable that a woman would be shown this much grace and kindness. Why is it so rare for women and their babies to be treated with respect and dignity in a situation like this?
my lvm father hammered it into my head that being a single mom and your husband leaving you was the worst thing that could possibly happen to a woman, and that it was fully my responsibility to not end up like that. It's just insane becuase he literally had put my mom though that while she was pregnant with my little brother, and after he just used it to be like "see? see how bad it is?" Really evil stuff. What the family did for that woman and her baby would not even cross his mind as something that would even be a possibility if I were in that situation.
[–]The_Cat_EmpressFDS Newbie 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They just friggin' adopted her when she was left high and dry because of a scrote...
I'm crying...this is so great and I'm so happy the family was sweeter than the man she married...<3
[–]missaskia 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
When my ex tried to kill me his mum messaged me and asked me to help him figure out why he did it.
[–]kungfucasserole 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a courageous and selfless act of bravery. Imagine if this became the societal norm, the impact would be profound. It's so sad that men need financial consequences even beyond court-mandated child support in order to be deterred from acting like a degenerate.
[–]ThePatriarchyIsTrash 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's the kind of MIL I wish I had. When I told mine that her son had assaulted me she told me not to talk to her ever again because she loved her son. And? How is Ioving your child incompatible with telling them that they can't assault ppl? I even had messages that I showed her of him admitting to the behavior.
Thank fuck she had one of the good ones. The reason shit men exist is because of shit parents. Not always, but far too frequently. I'm just glad this MIL is taking care of the victim
[–]MeredeenFDS Newbie 43 points44 points45 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a fucking horrible family, what do you mean not family anymore? This child is their family member's kid! How can they be so heartless?
[–]Feline_Fine3 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All those enablers in their family! I’m glad that his parents recognize what a piece of shit he is.
[–]reflections-of 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This woman’s family is calling her and giving her heat in the hopes that she will what— kick out a 3 month old baby and the baby’s vulnerable mother? Shame on them. Glad to see some parents who have values and are willing to admit that their son is a bad person.
[–]szasriracha 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Based mother-in-law
[–]Mbg140897 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He probably thought he was going to ride through life easy breezy with everything in that will. I know since it’s their son it was an equally hard decision to make but this is what someone like him needs. Way to go on the parents for having compassion for the person he put through hell. I’m sure she was scared and felt like she would be thrown to the way side. Thank god for good people like these ones.
[–]zoruaFDS Newbie 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
An outsider? The mother of their grandchild is an outsider? People are awful.
[–]a_girl_with_a_dream 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Imagine the cultural shit that could occur if more parents were like this
[–]my3altaccount 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's crazy how even decent parents can raise the worst of the scrotes.
That poor woman, I'm just glad she has someone there to support her.
[–]found_thissubfinally 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is so beautiful. People like them gives me hope for humanity.
[–]megomyegoooooo 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There are plenty of people sticking up for his shitty behavior, you dont have to partake. Good for them. How the hell are they wrong for shaming their son for that? Thats their grandchild and the mother of their grandchild. I'd be angry too. Sounds like she didn't do anything wrong either... Not that it makes it okay to up and leave your child??
[–]mtan15FDS Newbie 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
AMEN! I barely got a phone call from ex-inlaws
[–]FDS-GFYFDS Newbie 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I am so worried that he will get a g*n and hurt them.
[–]spinsterchachkiesFDS Disciple 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
More people like this need to be in the world 😭
[–]FeminineprincessFDS Newbie 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
God is good
[–]MsXxSelfDestructxXFDS Newbie[🍰] 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
i mean they raised a shitty son, wonder if they're just trying to cover their own asses.
[–]imaydestroyyallFDS Newbie 40 points41 points42 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
From my experience, some people are just shitty no matter how they were brought up.
[–]ColdxConfectionFDS Newbie 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My grandparents, especially my grandmother, did this to my father when my mom divorced him for being abusive. They also helped my mom and helped raise us, my maternal grandma was a terrible parent and my paternal grandma became like the mother figure my mom always wanted. Grandma passed away in 2010 from cancer and I miss her all the time and am so thankful for her.
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